Like a Moth to the Flames
by AlexCastro
Summary: This short story explores the difficulties that Magnus' immortality presents for Magnus and Alec's relationship. Disclaimer: The Mortal Instrument characters belong to Cassandra Clare, and I claim no ownership over the parts of this story belonging to the Shadowhunters TV producers and writers. The rest of it is all of my own creation.
1. Chapter 1: What if I Moved in?

**What if I moved in?**

Magnus sighed deeply as he looked out the window to a sky that slowly turned from night to morning. The late winter sun hesitantly and rather shyly peeked above the New York skyline as if trying to gather the courage to shine even if it could not warm. Magnus held a cup of coffee in both hands, but its content, mostly untouched, had grown cold without him noticing. It didn't matter, he was not thirsty, and he held the cup more for comfort than for anything else. Only his body was standing by the window; his thoughts were elsewhere, meandering miles away and, at the same time, just in the next room; entangled in memories that were both centuries and just a few days old.

"What if I moved in?" Alec had asked four days ago, his voice full of expectation and promise; his features so young. The features of a man that has his whole life ahead of him, a life believed to be endless and thus easy to offer in years and decades of shared moments. The question still rang in Magnus' ear four days later, clear as the sound of water running between rocks, every syllable, every word, every gesture engraved in Magnus' memory, indelible and permanent. The question echoed other similar questions, asked in different voices, different languages, different times, each time the questions becoming a door that opened to a whole world of possibilities and to the certainty of inevitable loss.

Four days ago, just four days ago that the question came into existence, leaving the realm of the imagination to become reality. Five words that could not be taken back; five words that Magnus could not unhear. Four days since the question was answered –"a wonderful idea but for the future" –an answer that, like the question, could not be retrieved. And now the question and its answer lie in the midst of a battlefield, bloody and wounded by other words, other gestures, other silences, other abandonments.

Magnus turned and fixed his eyes on the wooden box on the side table, its contents painfully familiar, mementoes of times gone by, of lives outlived, of heartbreaks, farewells, wounds. "Immortals should not fall in love," Camille had told Magnus once, and now Magnus thought that perhaps she had been right. Love for immortals not only means to live with the certainty of unbearable loss; it also means to carry along a sometime endless chain of memories, heavy, painful and still precious. Despite the pain and grief, Magnus knew he would never give up any of those memories. Yet, now those memories hurt Alec, reminded him of his own mortality and of the certainty of Magnus's continuance; those mementoes were the painful reminder that Alec's life was fleeting and finite while Magnus' wasn't.

The box with its precious content had unsuspectedly become a weapon in this battle he and Alec were waging, Magnus' memories turned into double-edge daggers that indiscriminately hurt and cut. "If I am lucky perhaps one day one of my arrowheads will end up in that box," Alec had said, the words piercing the bubble, expelling them both from the blissful paradise in which they had lived for the last two months.

That night when under white crisp sheets, they reached for the lips and touch of the other, and their tongues traced paths already well travelled, there was something less and something more in bed with them. Alec could barely disguise a seething anger that had not been there before, an anger that made him unusually possessive, unusually greedy, as if the question and answer that now existed between them, had created a need to possess and dominate. That anger seemed to fill a space left by what was missing: the absence of the playfulness and intimacy that had always been part of their lovemaking, the absence of Alec's openheartedness that had always been the key that opened Magnus' heart and set the magic free.

Magnus had been frustrated and a few times that night the demon in him had been at the brink of breaking out from its containment, of exploding in thousands of angry gestures and words. But he had kept the demon tightly in check. Instead, he had told himself to be patient; that Alec was young and inexperienced; that he just needed to wait this difficult moment out; that Alec would understand one day that it was important not to rush; that with experience came patience. After all, he, Magnus, knew better; he had lived so long, gone through things like this before. But then, the next morning, after another argument, Alec had walked out and had not returned for three days, his absence a black hole in the middle of Magnus' life, and Magnus had known just how little he truly knew about heartbreak.

For three days, they had avoided one another, each licking their wounds, mending their pride, Alec upset that Magnus had treated him like a child; Magnus upset that Alec couldn't understand the burden of immortality and his need to live in this moment as if it could last an eternity. Three days of absence, yearning and desire. Then late last night Alec had stumbled drunk into their bed and when Magnus turned with an offering of peace, longing with every cell of his body for the touch of Alec's skin and the taste of his lips, it had not been only alcohol that Magnus smelled on him. Magnus had also perceived the scent of someone else impregnating Alec's skin, the foreign scent an invasion, an intrusion, an assault. Perhaps it was not just a foreign scent that Magnus perceived; but rather the energy of another life, something primal that Magnus, attuned as he was to Alec's body, could clearly perceive in the energy field that always surrounded the Shadowhunter.

Alec had fallen asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow and Magnus had gotten up a few minutes later, cursing his keen sense of smell, and the way his magic acted as a detection devise always attuned to Alec, always protecting, sheltering, reaching.

As he now run a finger lightly over surface of the box that contained his precious memories, Magnus asked himself whether it had been the question – what if I moved in? – that had been the first shot that declared the war. Was it the question or the answer he had given so reluctantly and cowardly that had started the crisis? Magnus turned back to the window and run a hand through his hair in a gesture of frustration and surrender. For he knew that, with every fiber of his being, he had wanted to say yes to Alec's question. Heck, many times in the last few weeks he had wanted to pose the question himself, ask "what if you moved in?" So many times, he had wanted to weave his life more tightly with Alec's; to share home, dreams, plans; to stake a claim on Alec; to call him his own and let Alec claim him also as his. Alec's question – What if I moved in? – had hung in the air for a fraction of a second, a generous offering that felt to Magnus like a forbidden fruit. He had yearned to reach and seize that sweet fruit, possess and own it with a greediness he had not felt in centuries. He had wanted to lose himself in the sweetness of love and in the promise of the life that Alec offered. In that split second, Magnus had foreseen years and decades of mornings waking up sheltered in the strong arms of the Shadowhunter, of Alec's off-tune singing while he made coffee in the kitchen, of intertwined lives and dreams, of belonging and possessing, of taking and offering in equal measure. He thought of long nights making love with abandon, losing himself in the sublime act of becoming one with Alec, of skins melting into one, of magic shared and spent in acts of love that fulfill and sate.

But when he looked up into Alec's expectant face, Magnus also saw just how young the Shadowhunter truly was, how inexperience, how innocent, how full of dreams. At that moment, other images came to mind: images of lost innocence, unfulfilled dreams, unspoken recriminations. He foresaw the moment when the illusion would shatter, when Alec would realize what it was really like to live with someone who didn't age, who stayed the same year after year, century after century. He foresaw the moment when, like other lovers before him, Alec would begin to question his life choices. Perhaps it would begin with a curiosity for the taste of other lips, or the feel of other skin; perhaps it would begin with a yearning to build a life with someone with whom he could truly grow old; perhaps it would be a desire to build a family, to have children, descendants who would carry the Lightwood name.

Magnus had experienced that shattering moment before, the moment when a lover realized that love was not enough, that life with an immortal was more than what they had bargained for. He had seen those lovers leave in search of another life, of other adventures, of other arms. He had seen them go and, for a while, had mourned those lost relationships, wallowing in a self-pity that made him close his heart for years and sometimes decades.

Magnus knew that in the past, he wouldn't have cared about the possibility or even certainty of heartbreak. He would have jumped at the opportunity to have, even if for a short while, a life that resembled a mortal life. But with Alec, things were different. Magnus had known it that first night when Alec invited the demon in Magnus to come out, to leave its prison and roam free in the certainty of unconditional acceptance, that first night when Magnus let his magic flow free and go in search of Alec. No one ever before had shown such an open heart, no one before had accepted Magnus so completely. That night Magnus had realized that this man and this love were unusual, like nothing and no one he had ever experienced before. For the first time in his immortal life, Magnus saw the end of his existence, the end that would come not as death, but as a permanent state of petrification. He understood that if he gave his whole heart to Alec, there would be nothing left of him if and when Alec broke his heart. In part, that was the reason he had said no when Alec asked to move in. He had been a coward and had wanted to delay the certainty of heartbreak a little bit longer. Foolish, he now thought, foolish and futile.

Now it seemed that his prophesy had come true. Alec had brought the scent of another into their bed, a scent that assaulted, polluted and spoiled that space that until now had been only theirs. The scent felt like a bomb exploding in the midst of his life, a bomb that destroyed the question, the answer, and Magnus' heart.

Magnus was angry even if he knew he had no right. He, after all, had said "a wonderful idea, but for the future." And, he had made a promise to Alec, a promise Alec didn't know about: to never clip Alec's wings, to never deprive him of life, to never curtail his freedom. Alec was mortal; he didn't have centuries to lose love and find it again. He was also loyal, and Magnus knew that if they moved in together, Alec would be faithful. They were similar that way, one heart-at-the-time kind of people. The problem was that Alec had only one life to give and Magnus had many. Magnus wanted Alec to live that life to the fullest, to experience everything life had to offer. He couldn't be so avaricious and deprive Alec of the chance to live a full life, to experience other loves, other arms, other dreams. Why then was he now so devastated by the knowledge that someone else, someone who was not Magnus, had left his scent on Alec?

"Magnus?" Alec called from the doorway, his voice hoarse and still full of sleep irrupting into Magnus' miserable contemplation; that voice that sounded so young and so endearing; that voice that Magnus knew would be indelibly engraved in his memory even after he had forgotten his own name. Magnus closed his eyes and, for a second, let the sound of his own name echo in the lovely voice of this man he loved with an intensity that still astonished him.

"Magnus?" Alec called again and, this time, Magnus knew he could not delay the future any longer, so he gathered all the energy left in him to plaster a smile on his face before turning.

"Good morning," he said. "How did you sleep?"

"Magnus, we need to talk," Alec said by way of a reply, and Magnus could see uncertainty mixed with something that was perhaps shame plainly written on Alec's lovely features. Alec run his hand through his messy hair in that gesture that always broke Magnus' concentration, and Magnus thought that if this was the end, the memory of Alec running his hand through his hair, and the way in which the morning sun illuminated his angelic face would be another memory he would carry in his heart forever. He knew that there would be no need for any other memento, no arrowhead, no picture. Rather, this image, the image of an angel just in need of wings, would be the reminder of love and loss.

"Sure," Magnus replied, calling on all his powers to maintain a cheerful tone.

"Magnus, I have done something I am ashamed of."


	2. Chapter 2 - Shame and Guilt

**Shame and Guilt**

Slowly and rather reluctantly, Alec became aware of the morning sunshine filtering through the window, its rays caressing his face with warm fingers and illuminating the inside of his still closed eyelids. The morning light seemed to be calling him, beckoning him to leave the sleeping world and return to the waking one but Alec was still unwilling to join reality. Instinctually and still half asleep, he turned towards the side of the bed Magnus always occupied and brought his nose to Magnus' pillow searching for the scent of sandalwood, mountain air and caramel that was undeniably Magnus. When his nose registered the familiar scent, he inhaled deeply and then exhaled with a loud sigh, feeling at home in this bed, this room and this apartment.

Suddenly, a cascade of memories and images from the night before fell on him, like an unwelcomed rain that quickly turned into an icy torrent that jerked him from his half-asleep state and abruptly landed him into a reality of shame and guilt, his heart pounding in his chest. He opened his eyes with a start and looked around the room, searching for the familiar sight of Magnus and when he saw that the room was empty except for himself, he laid his head back on the pillow and with unusual roughness run his fingers through his messy hair as if wanting to pluck out of his head the memories that caused him so much shame and guilt.

His head hurt, and he was queasy, evident symptoms of a hangover, but the discomfort was nothing in comparison to the abyss that had opened in the center of his being, a vast and expanding emptiness eating up the pleasure he had felt a few seconds ago when he had inhaled the familiar scent of Magnus. "What did you do Alec?" he asked himself, shame and despondency overcoming and obscuring all other discomfort. He looked at his hands, those hands that until a few hours ago he had thought were incapable of betrayal, those hands that until a few hours ago had only touched one man in the way a lover touched the skin of another. He felt an uncontrollable impulse to get up, run to the bathroom, get under a hot shower, and scrub himself clean, erase from his body and his mind the memories and the knowledge of his betrayal.

The shame felt like sandpaper scrapping the inside of his entrails and the guilt seemed to be squeezing his chest, crushing him against the bed, cutting the air from his lungs. He was disgusted with himself for he had made a terrible mistake and there was no hiding from it. Loyalty and faithfulness had, together with honesty and love, always been cardinal points in his moral compass, they were the qualities that allowed others – Jace, his sister, the Shadowhunters under his command – to trust his leadership and follow him blindingly into battle. Yet, his unconscionable behaviour from last night had shaken this moral compass making him doubt his own sense of who he was, his own sense of self-worth.

He swung his feet off the bed and, turning, sat for a minute on the edge of the mattress, his head in his hands, recounting the events of the night before, each memory returning to him and hitting him like acid, burning him, eating him up, the hole in his center filling with dread. After a minute, he stood, put on his boots, and walked towards the bathroom where he splashed some water on his face. When he looked at his reflection in the mirror, his own eyes were full of reproach. "What did you do?" he asked his own reflection once again. "What are you going to do now?"

The questions hung in the air for a second, as if in search of answers, but Alec knew already what the answer was. He had to tell Magnus the truth, he had to confess his mistake and hope Magnus would forgive him. He owed him that much. "I am not a child," Alec had told Magnus the last time they spoke, right before he walked out on him. He had been angry and frustrated because he felt Magnus was patronizing him, dismissing his fears about what it would be like to live a mortal life with someone who was immortal, to grow old and become a burden to Magnus, an old man holding on to the arm of a young one. And, now he had gone off and behaved exactly like a child, done what he never imagined himself capable of doing. Alec sighed loudly and looked at his reflection one last time before turning and going in search of Magnus, resigned to his fate, knowing that there was no alternative but to tell the truth and hope for the best. As he walked out of the room, one memory kept playing in his mind: Magnus' clear and lovely voice telling him "I am a one-soul-at-the-time kind of man."

He found Magnus in the living room, looking out the window, lost in thought or perhaps in memories, a forlorn expression in his beautiful eyes and a slight bow in his back, as if he was carrying an invisible but heavy burden. Seeing him there, looking out towards the distance, Alec felt his heart sinking even further and a knot took residence in his throat making it even harder to breath or speak.

"Magnus," he called to him, his voice shaking. Alec wanted to approach Magnus, wrap his arms around him like he had done so many mornings before, bring his nose to the side of his neck and breath in his enticing scent, feel him relax against him, strong and soft, familiar and mysterious at the same time. He wanted to feel the magic energy that always emanated from Magnus, and that sometimes seemed to reach towards Alec and caress him with the tender touches of feathers. He wished with all his heart he could erase the last four days, or at the very least the last twenty-four hours, to erase the mistake he knew he could not run away from.

"Magnus," he called again, and this time Magnus turned and smiled. But despite Magnus' efforts, the smile did not reach his eyes, those eyes that now looked at him with unfathomable and haunting sadness. Magnus said something, but Alec didn't hear what it was, for a voice full of guilt and shame was screaming loudly in his ears, telling him to stay quiet, to not relinquish the secret of what he had done, to keep the truth of his betrayal to himself. For a split second, he was tempted to say nothing, to walk towards Magnus, wrap his arms around him and pretend that nothing had happened. But then he remembered that honesty was also part of his moral compass, that even if Magnus never found out what he had done, he, Alec, would know. He would carry the guilt of not only having been weak and untrue, but also of concealing his sin. That lie, that concealment born of shame and fear, would forever stain their relationship.

"Magnus, I have done something I am ashamed of," he said before he could stop himself. Before the voice in his head could issue further protest and weaken his resolve, he dislodged the words from his chest, forced them pass his throat and expelled them through his lips. As he said the words, he looked into Magnus' beautiful eyes, those eyes that reflected the morning light in tones of chocolate and coffee, and he understood that even before the words were out of his mouth, Magnus already knew what he was about to day. If he had thought he couldn't feel any more shame or guilt before, he now knew he had been wrong, for his words not only made his betrayal something real between them, something indelible and likely permanent, but now with his words, he was wounding Magnus.

"Who is it?" was Magnus's short reply.

Alec forced the breath he had been holding out of his chest and realized there was no other choice but to plow through and tell Magnus everything. "No one of significance," he replied even though he knew the answer was trivial and trite.

Magnus' face suddenly transformed from the sad face of a second ago, to a mask of fury. "I doubt it is someone of no importance considering how guilty you look right now Alec. Who. Is. It?" he asked again, pausing after each word as if wanting Alec to know that there was no escape from the question.

"Another Shadowhunter," Alec replied and as he said the words he saw Magnus' face transform once again from fury to profound sadness and dismay. Alec always thought that Magnus was the strongest person he knew. The warlock with his magical nature, and his hard and glittery exterior seemed to walk through life as if his feet were barely touching the ground, as if what happened around him was trivial, something of little concern to someone who had lived for so long and had seen so much. Nothing seemed to ever bother or surprise him much or for too long, and that was in part what made Alec feel so insecure and inexperienced. The world, his world, and what happened in it, were very important to Alec. Perhaps it was because he was young and had only one life to live, only one life to build and prove himself, while Magnus had many and would have many more. One day, Alec knew, he would be just one memory among thousands of other memories, one more memento in Magnus's chest of remembrances, and that made him feel small, insignificant, as if the love, the only love he had to offer, the only life he had to give were not enough. But now, his words seemed to crack Magnus' hard exterior and what Alec saw underneath was the sad expression of a vulnerable child. Alec knew that he would do anything and pay any price just to erase that look of vulnerability from Magnus' eyes.

"Another Shadowhunter," Magnus repeated bitterly, "I should have guessed. How long has this been going on? Is this the reason why you have been acting out lately?"

"I haven't been acting out Magnus," Alec said indignantly even though he knew he had no right to feel indignation. Magnus still didn't - or perhaps refused – to understand the struggle he was waging, the immense sense of despair that overcame him every time he thought of how short and insignificant his very mortal life was. How small he felt every time he thought of the hundreds of years Magnus had lived, of the many lives Magnus had touched, of the lovers that had come and gone the way he too had entered and would leave his life one day. Magnus didn't understand the jealousy that overcame him every time he thought of those things Magnus kept in his box of memories; every time he thought that perhaps what Magnus and he did when they were together, those feelings and sensations that were so new to him, were trivial to Magnus, for he had done and felt those things with those men and women whose memories he treasured so much. Magnus didn't understand how insecure he felt knowing that he, with his fragile mortality and his inexperience, could never offer Magnus anything new. "By the Angel, Magnus, why can you not understand how hard all of this is for me?"

"Oh, don't turn this on me, Alec; you won't get off the hook that easy," Magnus replied, the bitterness in the words souring the air around them. "You cannot throw the stone and now hide the hand, you owe me the truth of what happened. How long has this been going on?"

"There is nothing going on," Alec replied. "It was just one misstep, one mistake, one moment of stupid weakness." Alec knew that there was no way out; that now that some of the words were out, he had to spill them all, laid the whole story for Magnus to see, so he told Magnus everything.

The whole things had been stupid really and had begun innocently: the feel of a pair of green eyes on a golden face that followed him as Alec walked along the Institute's corridors, a pair of eyes that rested on his face a little bit too long before turning away. There had been nothing more to it, just curiosity and recognition in a pair of eyes, just the unexpected sensation of someone's attention; just the hint of longing in another's features. Underhill had arrived at the Institute a few weeks ago, on temporary assignment, part of his Shadowhunter training which required him to spend time away from home. Alec hadn't given the young man a second thought after their initial meeting, but then a few days ago, Underhill had come to his office and had told Alec that he felt honored to serve under his leadership; that Alec was an example; that because of Alec, he felt he could be himself, come out of the closet and live a truer life. The declaration had surprised Alec and left him speechless. He had never wanted to be an example to anyone. In fact, right then he felt like a poor example of follow, so full of doubt and insecurity, so weighted down by his own mortality and by his incapacity to come to terms with what he thought were the unsurmountable differences between him and Magnus.

"I was so upset after our fight," he now told Magnus, "I felt that you were not able to understand what I was feeling; I felt jealous, small and insignificant." Those feeling had felt like a dark cloud hanging above Alec's head, making everything feel grim, tainting every memory of him and Magnus in a grey hue. "Anyway, last night I went to the Hunter's Moon. I thought I would see you there, but you did not come, and I felt a mixture of disappointment and relief. I didn't want to fight anymore, I didn't want to feel what I was feeling."

Alec told Magnus that he had sat at the bar and had asked Maya to pour him a drink. He wasn't much of a drinker; alcohol always went quickly to his head and made him feel out of control. He generally drunk only when he was with Magnus or Jace because with them he felt safe; he knew they would make sure he didn't do anything stupid.

"You should have called Jace and asked him to come and rescue you before you did something stupid and childish," Magnus said reproachingly.

"It is not an excuse Magnus," Alec said before continuing, the word 'childish' threatening to ignite their old argument. "Anyway, before I knew it, I had had a few drinks and Underhill was there, sitting beside me and we were talking, and he was flirting and no one else beside you had ever flirted with me before, and I didn't know what to do, how to react. I was dizzy, angry and sad."

"I think you had enough," Underhill had said taking the last half-empty glass from Alec's hand, taking him by the arm and walking him out of the bar.

"I never truly understood how different Magnus and I really are," Alec had said when they were outside, the cool air hitting Alec in the face and intensifying his state of drunkenness.

"We, Nephilim, are a special kind of people," replied Underhill. "When we give our heart to someone, we give it completely, for ever, and without reservation. That is why it is so hard for us to fall in love with people who are not like us, who may not feel love the way we feel it. That is why it is safer and easier to love another Nephilim." Underhill had taken a step closer to Alec, and when Alec looked into those green eyes, all the anger, frustration and despair he had felt in the last few days, all the feelings of inadequacy and inexperience had rushed back. Before he knew what he was doing, he had grabbed Underhill by the front of his shirt and had pushed him against the wall in the alley outside the bar, and Alec's mouth had come down on the young man's lips, the kiss desperate, angry, frustrated. Underhill had grabbed Alec by the waist and had pulled him closer, their bodies almost crushing against one another.

That is all it had been, one kiss, nothing more. For as soon as his lips touched Underhill's lips, the kiss felt terribly wrong, as if it was sour or perhaps poisonous. In that instant, Magnus' lovely face came to Alec's mind, his laugh at something that Alec had said or done, those luminous cat eyes, which Magnus didn't feel the need to glamour anymore when it was just the two of them. That image that was permanently edged in Alec's mind suddenly sobered him up and he pushed Underhill away. "This is wrong, I am sorry, I shouldn't have done that," he said while with one hand he wiped his mouth as if wanting to erase the kiss, the mistake, the shame.

Underhill looked into Alec's eyes and his rejection, shame and regret must have been clearly written there because he quickly gathered himself, stiffen his back and told Alec not to worry; that it had been him the one to misread the signals; that Alec should not concern himself; that no one would ever know what had happened; that he was sorry. "It is me who has behaved unconscionably; forgive me," Alec hastily said and then turned and walked away, his heart pounding loudly in his chest.

"That is all it was, Magnus," he now told the warlock whose face had remained impassive, a dangerous current running underneath an apparently calmed surface. "That is all it was but still I feel terrible. Although I know I don't deserve your forgiveness, I ask that you give me a chance to prove to you that this will never happen again. Please Magnus," he added, his voice pleading.

Magnus took a deep breath and forced his face to soften and look at Alec indulgently, the effort visible even to Alec. "That is what I meant when I told you the other day that the reason you were struggling accepting the memories I hold of other lovers is because you are too young and inexperienced. I am your first relationship and, of course, it is normal to wish to experience other relationships, to be young and wild for a while. It would be unfair for me to begrudge you your need to explore life more fully. It is not like we agreed to be only with each other."

It was now Alec's expression the one that went from shame to fury. Magnus was once again reducing all their problems to his youth and inexperience; he was once again treating him like a child. "Magnus, I am not going to justify my actions because there is nothing I could say that could excuse my behaviour – it was unconscionable and unforgivable – but please stop treating me like a child. Stop saying that what I did I did because I don't know better, or that my struggles with your immortality and with the weight of your past are the result of my inexperience. I am not a child and I know better; that is what makes my mistake something I cannot forgive myself for, because I know how I feel about you. I know my own heart, what I feel for you is real. Stop trivializing it!" His voice grew in volume as he poured into it all the frustration he had been accumulating over days of seething anger. "And please do not act like you understand the reason why I did what I did; do not give me the 'I-understand-because-you are-too-young' speech, or act as if you need to indulge me like one indulges a child with a temper tantrum. Be angry at me, so I can know that I matter, that I am not just one more of the thousands of people you have been with. Please." The last word came out almost as a whisper, as a plea he didn't want to make but could help himself making.

"What do you want from me Alec?" Magnus asked, his voice carrying a mixture of despair and anger. "Do you want me to tell you that I cannot forgive infidelity? Well, I cannot forgive it. I had to suffer through it all those years that I was with Camille and I told myself that I would never put myself through that again. The only thing that is stopping me from throwing you out of my house right now is the conviction that you are young and inexperienced and that I have no claim over you, no right to stop you from living or to tie you down. But, god knows, I am having a hard time looking at you right now."

The words felt like a slap across Alec's face, a slap he knew he deserved but that still stank. "I am sorry Magnus, please know that I am sorry," he said and took a step closer to Magnus reaching for his hand. Magnus took a step back, and the gesture felt like a punch right to the center of Alec's stomach. At that moment, Alec felt like the world was crushing down, the sky falling down in sharp pieces that cut his skin on their way to the ground.

"I know you struggle with my immortality," Magnus went own. "I know you struggle with the fact that I have lived other lives before you, but my immortality is not a choice, while your behaviour was. You could have stopped yourself but chose not to. You resent the fact that I have loved others, but I never lied to you about that and I would have never been with anyone else while I was with you. What were you thinking Alec?"

"I wasn't thinking Magnus," Alec replied. "I didn't plan this. I was angry and frustrated, mostly with myself because I was the one with the issue. I was feeling diminished, small, insignificant and, for a split second, I wanted to feel like a man and not a boy. But I was mistaken. Please forgive me," he said once again. He didn't know how many times he had asked Magnus to forgive him, but he knew there were not enough.

"I don't know if I can forgive you right now Alec," Magnus replied. Throughout this whole conversation, he never called him Alexander, for that was the name that he had promised himself to only use in the gentle tone of loving moments, and this was not one of those moments. "I think you better leave now; I need time to process all of this, and you need time to decide whether it is me, _all of me_ , immortality and all, you want to be with. Perhaps a relationship with another Shadowhunters, someone with less of a history, someone more like you, is what you really need."

"Magnus, come on, we can work through this," Alec said and took another step closer to Magnus, yearning for the touch of his hand, wanting to erase the look of betrayal and disappointment from the warlock's face.

"Please leave Alec," Magnus said, and he turned away from Alec and towards the window, his voice like a death sentence, final, and unmoving.

Alec let his head hang down his chest for a second, before he sighed, walked towards the door and left. Magnus turned when he heard the door close. He wanted to go after Alec, called him back, tell him that he forgave him, that it was not the mistake he had made the reason he had asked him to leave, but he called on all his powers to stop himself, to stay where he stood, his eyes on the door through which his happiness had just walked out.

Two days later, when Magnus was sitting on the sofa, his cat on his lap, his eyes lost in the distance as he contemplated the emptiness of his life, and the fleeting nature of happiness, his phone vibrated in his pocket making his heart jump with anticipation. He had been staring at the phone more and more often in the last couple of days, wishing that Alec would call him even though he knew he wouldn't. He knew that Alec would respect his request and stay away; the Shadowhunter was respectful like that and he would never want to intrude or impose. That was what Alec was like; he never thought himself important enough to be entitled to interrupt or impose. A few times in the last two days, Magnus had almost dialed Alec's number, but he had stopped himself. He had been a coward because he knew that as long as Alec stayed away, he, Magnus, would not have to come to terms with the fact that his heart was truly in danger when it came to the young Shadowhunter. He now took the phone out of his pocket, his hand shaking and as he looked at the screen, a message flashed on it: a message he had wanted so much to receive, a message from Alec. But the happiness was all too brief and quickly turned to sadness, regret and despair.

"Magnus, I am leaving for Idris. I hope one day you will forgive me," were the words he read on the screen. Each word a stab on his already broken heart. Just like that, Alec was gone, gone to where Magnus couldn't follow.

 **Sorry it took me this long to post a second chapter. Life is busy. This still needs some work, but I thought I would post it anyway.**


	3. Chapter 3 - Like a Moth to the Flames

**Like a Moth to the Flame**

After stretching the tension of yet another sleepless night out of his aching muscles, Alec's started up the winding trail leading to the hilltop. At first, he run at an easy pace, synchronizing his strides with the rhythm of his breathing. The early morning was clear, calm and quiet, and the trail was completely deserted, the only sounds came from the call of birds, the occasional tapping of woodpeckers on the tree trunks, and the odd rabbit or squirrel rummaging for food in the undergrowth. He breathed in deeply and the aroma of the spruce and oak trees under which canopy he run, of wet earth, and of the first wild flowers announcing the imminent arrival of spring reminded him of how far away from home he was. The morning was cold, winter had yet to completely surrender, and he could see his breath coming out in puffs of steam. The chill threatened to penetrate his light jacket, and the breeze felt icy against his face, but he felt no compulsion to use a warming rune. He wanted to feel the morning chill against his skin and wished the cold to push away the memories that never seemed to be too far away from his mind.

As he pushed up towards the summit, Alec's muscles begun to complain, and keeping an even rhythm in his breathing became more of a struggle. Still, he pressed on, increasing the pace, his feet hitting the ground harder and harder with a determination that at times felt like anger or desperation. He forced his mind to abandon all other thoughts except for those needed to keep the rhythm of his running, determined to be no more than movement, just the sinuous stretching and contracting of muscles, no thought, no past, not future, just this moment and the mindless exertion of his running. As his mind became singularly focused, a gust of emotions suddenly washed over Alec and his eyes filled with tears, the result, perhaps, of the adrenaline coursing through his system. It was as if the efforts to run weakened the control he constantly kept on his emotions, and the feelings he kept bottled up began to flow unrestrained and unchecked.

By the time he reached the summit, the muscles in Alec's chest and legs were screaming in pain, his face was washed in tears and sweat, and his breathing was ragged and laborious. When he reached the lookout that marked the end of the trail, he bent down and put his hands on his knees, gasping for air, his heart threatening to jump out of his chest. He tried to rein in his unruly emotions by taking a few deep breaths, inhaling through the pain in his chest and the burning in his throat. He dried the tears and sweat with the hem of his t-shirt and, reaching for the water bottle attached to his belt, took a couple of sips, the cold liquid tasting a little bit salty as it run down his throat carrying with it the last of the tears.

When his breathing had settled somewhat, he finally straighten and looked around at the magnificent scenery unfolding before him. This was one of Alec's favorite spots in Idris. From this lookout, he could clearly see the glass city below, a city that, except for the demon towers that kept constant watch, appeared still dormant this early in the morning. Alicante extended like a blanket from the foot of the hill towards the lake, as if it was permanently looking towards the water waiting perhaps for the return of the Angel. From this distance, the canals that run through the city resembled embroidered blue and green lines on that blanket, or perhaps even veins carrying life from the mountains towards the lake. In cloudless mornings like this one, Alec got a 360-degree view of the mountains far in the distance, their peaks permanently covered in white; of the dense forest that surrounded Idris with its magnificent and ancestral trees; of the lake with its crystalline waters; and of the farmlands that provided food to Alicante's residents. 'Nobody looking at this scenery should be unhappy,' he thought. Yet, despite all his attempts at concealment and the hard exterior he projected to others, Alec still felt as unhappy, miserable and heartbroken as he had been when he arrived in Idris six weeks ago.

"You cannot go now," Izzy had said when he suddenly announced that he was leaving for Idris. "You must stay and work things out with Magnus."

"There is nothing to work out," Alec had replied. "Magnus doesn't want to have anything to do with me. He told me to leave."

"But you have to work things out. Your guys love each other," she had refuted. "If you want, I can go speak with him. Tell him that you are sorry for whatever he thinks you did."

"No Izzy, just leave it," he had pleaded with his sister. "My mind is made up; I am going to Idris." He had felt a need to put distance between him and Magnus, leave the city to avoid the temptation of going to the warlock's apartment and once again beg forgiveness. Magnus needed time and he had to give it to him, even if that time turned into an eternity. Magnus had all the time in the world, after all, and weeks, months or years might mean little to someone who had all eternity to get over a broken heart. Alec wasn't fooling himself; he knew he had broken Magnus' heart, betrayed his trust. He had seen it in the depth of the warlock's eyes. Magnus was likely having as hard a time with Alec's mistake as he, Alec, was having.

"But what are you going to do in Idris and who is going to lead the Institute while you are away?" Izzy had asked.

"You know all the Institute Heads must take special training, and since we do not have a former Head to train me in New York, I have decided to go to the Idris Academy," Alec had explained. "Besides, things are quiet now and you and Jace can keep an eye on things while I am gone."

"But that training is more than two months long!" his sister had complained. "You cannot leave for that long! What is going to happen with you and Magnus while you are gone?"

"Nothing will happen, as nothing is happening now. As I told you, Izzy, Magnus doesn't want to be with me anymore." The statement had had a ring of finality and its truth pressed against Alec's chest and made it hard to breath, but there was nothing that Alec could do, except to honor Magnus' request and stay away. So, he had packed a bag and had arranged for one of the warlocks in Idris to open a portal for him. He had run into Underhill on his way out, and the young Shadowhunter had stopped, smiled and shaken his hand, not a thread of resentment in his expression.

"I will be completing my training here in the next few days and I will then head to the Sydney Institute for a few months before going to my new post in Mexico City," he had informed Alec, and Alec had congratulated him, apologized once again for that night at the bar, and wished him well. "You are a good Shadowhunter," he had said and meant it. As he watched Underhill walk away, Alec couldn't imagine what could have ever made him step over the line with the young man.

He had hoped that time in Idris would help heal his wounded heart, or at least grow a scab over the wound, so it could stop bleeding. But no matter how much time passed, how much training and studying he did, nothing helped. His heart hurt as much, or perhaps more as the first day. His first thought every morning was of Magnus and despite the long hours of combat training, lectures in Downworld diplomacy, Nephilim history, law, weaponry and strategy, the memories of the warlock still kept him awake at night. During the day, he struggled to keep his mind on his work, and found himself thinking of home, missing the feel of Magnus' arms around him, and his smile welcoming him at the door of his apartment. To keep his mind occupied, in addition to the grueling physical training expected of him, he had begun to run every morning, getting up at the crack of dawn, in an effort to tire his body and cure his insomnia. At first, he had run in the training center, but as soon as the snow began to melt, he decided to run outside, despite the cold, the rain and the wind. He had never spent too much time away from New York. As a result, except for the occasional run through Central Park, his feet were mostly accustomed to even pavement and asphalt. Thus, running on soft mulch and uneven terrain had added a new challenge and more than once, he had returned to his room with scratches and sore ankles. He avoided healing runes though, relishing for a while in the sensation of physical discomfort joining the constant aching of his soul.

Alec had also started spending his free time in the Academy's library going through its extensive collection of personal diaries and mission reports from former Institute Heads from all over the world, including those belonging to some of his ancestors. He had always liked history, but as he read those diaries and reports, he found himself searching for clues of Magnus' past relationship to the Nephilim, hungry for some knowledge about Magnus' past, some connection to the man he loved, even if it was across time, across decades and centuries. He missed him, with a yearning that pierced his heart and left a hole in the pit of the stomach. He missed Magnus with an intensity that left him breathless and adrift. He dreamed of him every night and every time his mind was idle, it inevitably went back to his memories of Magnus.

Now as he looked out towards the mountains and the forest in the distance, and at the deep blue morning sky, his mind begun to replay the memory that had awoken him this morning with Magnus' name on his lips. Despite its innocence, the memory was filled with sensations, as if it was not just his brain remembering it, but rather the memory was written in every cell of his body. It was the memory of the first time Magus looked at him, that sparkle in the warlock's eyes that despite being glamored, shone like beacons in the dimly light room of his penthouse. Alec had begrudgingly accompanied Clary and his siblings to the party and all the way there he had complained about the recklessness of the enterprise. As usual, he had stayed in Jace's shadow, ready to defend or support, content with his condition as the invisible brother, the one that never spoke, the one no one noticed. It was safer that way, easier to remain undetected, to conceal his insecurity behind a taciturn and impenetrable exterior. Alec knew there were things about him that not even he understood: feelings, emotions that always caught him by surprise and made him feel ashamed and different. Thankfully, Jace's golden personality created a shadow big enough for Alec to hide under, allowing him to go unnoticed and unquestioned.

Yet for some reason he could not yet explain or believe, Magnus had looked past Jace and his eyes had rested squarely on Alec's face. At that moment, Alec had felt like a spotlight had been shone on him, like a hand was pulling him out of the darkness and into the light, and for a split second, nothing and no one else existed but him and Magnus, his intense gaze on him, recognizing him, unveiling him, peeling the cloak of invisibility under which Alec hid. Magnus' gaze had been curious, searching and full of mystery, and its piercing intensity had awoken something fundamental in the center of Alec's being. It had been a brief moment, Magnus' eyes warm on his skin, seeing him in a way that no one had ever seen him before, and then his eyes looked away and Alec felt cold all over, as if the sun had set plunging him into darkness.

He had gone home that night with the memory of Magnus' gaze on him, warm, piercing and searching. For days afterwards, the memory of those eyes had haunted Alec, jumping out at him from dark corners as he walked along the Institute's corridors, waiting for him when he went back to his room at night, furtively peeking at him from half-closed doors, and out of the pages of books. Alec had found himself smiling every time he thought of those eyes and had yearned to experience that moment in the light once more.

He had returned to Magnus' apartment a few days later, when he could no longer stand not knowing the meaning of the warlock's gaze. He had told himself that the visit was a way to exorcise the demons that were keeping him awake at night unable to erase Magnus' face from his mind. As he waited for Magnus to open the door, Alec wished with all his heart to find nothing unusual in the warlock's eyes; he wished to confirm that the whole thing had been his imagination. That would be easy, he told himself, he could go home and forget the whole affair, and he could go back to his place in Jace's shadow. But then Magnus had opened his door and those eyes had rested once again on Alec, first with surprise and then curiosity before a coy and seductive smile lifted the corners of Magnus' lips and his eyes sparkled with renewed recognition. And that was all it took for Alec to realize that there was no going back, that that moment at the threshold of Magnus' home would forever be engraved in his memory.

"What a pleasant surprise young Nephilim," Magnus had said in a playful tone, a drink in his hand, the glitter in his hair reflecting the light from the hallway in tones of red and purple. "I was hoping to see you again. To what do I owe this visit? Are you in search of a love potion perhaps, or more missing memories?" Magnus had asked in a jaunty and flirtatious voice that had caused the color to rush to Alec's face.

Alec had shifted his weight from foot to foot unable to think of what to say, all the excuses that he had made up in his mind suddenly forgotten. He looked away from Magnus' blinding stare and involuntarily shifted his gaze downward, past Magnus' silk shirt, its deep red color a perfect match for the deep brown that glamored Magnus' eyes, and down towards his own boots. At that moment, Alec wasn't any longer a man in his mid-twenties, no longer a veteran of countless battles, no longer an experienced Shadowhunter. He was a child caught in mischief he couldn't explain, a child naked under the sun.

Magnus would tell him later that in that short moment of silence and hesitation, he had realized just how inexperienced Alec was, and that his nervousness and the look of open anticipation had softened somewhat the hard exterior Magnus usually wore as an armor. He had realized that open flirtatiousness was not the right approach, and that he needed to be gentle and give Alec space and time.

"I was about to make myself another drink, would you like one?" Magnus had said opening the door wider to let Alec in.

Alec had wanted to turn and run away, take one step and then another and forget that he had ever ventured to the warlock's apartment. But then Magnus had turned and had walked back inside and before he could stop himself, Alec had taken a step across the threshold following him in. He had promised himself that he would have just one drink and then leave. That had been the first of many such promises he would make, promises to stay away from Magnus, promises that for some reason he couldn't keep. That night, Magnus had not asked again for the reason for his visit and had behaved as if having a Shadowhunter sitting in his living room, a drink in his hand, was the most normal thing in the world, something perhaps even planned. They had talked about inconsequential things, their lives in New York, the food they liked, Magnus' latest mishap trying to create a magic potion for a client. He had asked Alec about his family, his plans for the future, the books and music he liked, and Alec had found himself relaxing and even having fun. Magnus behaved like a perfect gentleman and made no attempt to flirt again, and Alec was surprised to feel safe and content. At the end of the night, Magnus saw him off at the door and told him that he had enjoyed the evening and would not mind doing it again.

That had been the first of many nights that Alec showed up at Magnus' apartment. He couldn't stop himself, his feet seemed to behave of their own accord and insisted in taking him back to Magnus'. Sometimes, he called from the street outside Magnus' apartment; sometimes he just rung the bell, and Magnus always greeted him as if Alec being at his door was the most common of occurrences. Alec told him of his life, his dreams, the things he liked, his relationship with his siblings, his missions, and Magnus never pushed and never gave him any indication that he wanted anything more than just friendly conversation over a shared drink. Alec felt like the moth that despite the danger keeps coming back to the flame, and as days went by and spending time with Magnus became almost a routine, he began to imagine reaching and running his fingers through Magnus' hair, or holding his hand. It was as if a magnetic force kept him in Magnus' orbit, and he didn't know how to break away from it, or how to break through it and finally close the distance between him and the warlock.

"What are you doing?" he had kept asking himself. "This is dangerous. What would you family say if they found out?" Still, he couldn't stop thinking about Magnus, the shine in his eyes, the weight of his gaze, his coy smile, the openness and sincerity of his laugh every time Alec said something funny. And then one night, as if by accident, Alec had touched Magnus' hand when the warlock was handing him a drink and the touch had been electric, sending shivers down Alec's spine, as if through the touch, Magnus had transferred some of his magic to Alec and it was now coursing through his veins and wracking havoc with his self-control. It had been just that: a fleeting touch, less than a second, but full of danger, promise and possibility. That night Alec had dreamed of the touch of Magnus' hand and the scent of his skin, and he understood that he was standing at another threshold, and that if he took a step across it, there would really be no going back. He had hesitated because he was afraid. The Nephilim could be judgmental, bigots, conservative. He was not only having feelings for a man, but also for a Downworlder. If he crossed that threshold, he would be breaking moral conventions as much as Nephilim's rule to keep the Downworld at arm's length. And, he would be putting Magnus in danger of being hurt by his people's bigotry and rejection. Alec knew that Magnus was hundreds of years older than him and was likely used to Nephilim closemindedness, but he felt unaccountably protective of Magnus. He did not want to be the reason for his suffering.

So, he had told himself that he would stop, that he wouldn't return to Magnus' apartment, that he could not disappoint his family, that a life in secret was a better option. For three days he had stayed away and had not called Magnus, and Magnus, respecting his space, had not called him either. For three days, he had lived with a permanent knot in his throat, and with the feeling that he was forcing something that had been square but that was now round back into a hole that no longer fit. By the fourth day, he couldn't stand the absence or the yearning anymore and he knew he had lost the battled with himself. Defeated, he had surrendered and had made his way back to Magnus'.

Magnus had opened his door, and for a split-second Alec thought he saw surprise and perhaps relief in the warlock's eyes. But then Magnus reined in his emotions and greeted him as if it had not been four days since the last time he had seen Alec. And without giving it another thought or saying a word, Alec had reached and taken Magnus' hand in his. He had then shifted his gaze from Magnus' eyes down toward his lips. For a suspenseful moment, he had gazed on those lips with an unreserved desire that surprised even him, before closing the distance that Magnus had respectfully kept between them to give Alec space and had kissed him. Alec had never kissed anyone before, he had never desired to kiss anyone, and now he was glad he had waited, for the taste and feel of Magnus' lips on his were like nothing he had ever experienced. The kiss had been gentle, sweet and full of promise, and it was as if every nerve ending in his body had concentrated in his lips, as if he could feel the touch of Magnus' lips in every cell, as if every inch of his skin was coming alive in millions of goosebumps.

Magnus had initially been surprised; Alec could tell in the way in which his back stiffened as if a gush of cold air had suddenly blown in his direction, but then his posture had softened against Alec, and his other hand, the one that Alec wasn't holding, was suddenly making a slow and gentle journey along Alec's arm. Alec broke contact for a second, wanting to gaze upon those enticing and inviting lips once again, wanting perhaps to catch his breath and to give Magnus the room to decide whether he wanted to pull away, but then those lips were like magnets pulling him back and he had, once again, surrendered to their pull. This time and as if by instinct, he had enticed Magnus to open his lips for him, and Magnus had done as he silently asked, and Alec thought he would die of surprise and pleasure as the taste of Magnus' lips invaded his senses and clouded his mind. With the tentativeness of those who for the first-time venture into new territory, Alec had let his tongue leave his own mouth and with a careful and gentle motion he had run it along Magnus' lips, and Magnus had rewarded him with a loud intake of air and his hand had fisted on Alec's sleeve, as if wanting to make sure that Alec would not fly away.

Alec had never imagined that a kiss could contain so much emotion, so much tenderness, so much promise, so much. He never imagined that a kiss could have the power of erasing all doubts, and to change him forever, altering his life course, and opening a whole new universe for him to explore and experience.

"Alexander," Magnus had whispered after a minute or an hour, Alec didn't know, and the name, his name, had sounded new in Magnus' lips, as if by calling him by his full name, Magnus was beckoning him to become a new man. Wanting to extend the moment a little longer, Alec had brought his lips to Magnus' mouth once again, and this time he lifted his other hand and entangled his fingers in Magnus' hair the way he had imagined doing so many times. At that moment, Alec realized just how limited his imagination had been; for the feel of Magnus' hair between his fingers, the sensation of his body leaning against his own, the soft feel of his lips and the way his breathing seemed to catch in his throat was like nothing Alec could have ever imagined or predicted.

"Alexander," Magnus had said again, a little bit more determination in his voice this time, and fear had suddenly creeped into the state of bliss Alec had been in a second ago. Perhaps, he though, he had made a mistake and misread the signals; perhaps the kiss was unwelcomed; perhaps the kiss had been unpleasant to Magnus. After all, he had never kissed anyone before. But then rather than pulling away, Magnus had rested his forehead against Alec's, as if not wanting to let go, and he had regaled him with a dazzling smile, a smile that had quieted Alec's apprehension.

"Was that okay Magnus?" Alec had asked wanting reassurance, his voice breathy and no louder than a whisper.

"It was the most perfect kiss in the history of kisses," Magnus had replied, his voice husky and deep. "But are you sure of what you are doing?" he asked, and his smile faltered momentarily, as if afraid that Alec would change his mind and pull away. Even at that moment, like at every moment before and after their first kiss, Magnus had given him the freedom to stop, to walk away, to set the terms and pace of their relationship.

"I want this Magnus," Alec had replied. "I have wanted it since the first time you looked at me."

Thinking back to his months with Magnus, Alec realized how much he had learned from the warlock, how little he had known and how much he had discovered about himself and about the world with Magnus. Yet that first kiss remained the most perfect of moments, as if Alec had known precisely what to do, as if he and Magnus had invented a new art of kissing. And now, Alec thought as he sighed loudly, the morning chill seeping into his bones and bringing him back to reality, he had lost Magnus, and all he had left was the memory of that first kiss forever engraved in his mind.

"You taught me so much Magnus," Alec whispered into the wind as he gazed towards the distance, "from world history to how to touch you; from literature to the art of kissing you. You taught me so much, but you didn't teach me how to live without you."

After a last glance towards the beautiful landscape that had become his refuge for the last six weeks, Alec turned and started back down the hill, running once again, hoping the exercise would quiet the memories; resigned to spend another day in a hopeless battle with his own despair.

Guinevere, the young Shadowhunter who acted as the Inquisitor's assistant, approached him as Alec was making his way towards his bedroom to take a shower before his first morning class.

"A fire message addressed to you passed through the wards this morning," she said handing him a folded piece of paper, a sigil on its front acting as a seal that only his stele could unlock. "You know that magical forms of communication need to be approved by the Inquisitor," she added in a stern tone that contrasted with her youthful demeanour.

"I apologize; I will make sure it doesn't happen again," Alec replied, taking the message and heading for his room. He didn't recognize the hand that had written his name on the message, and he was certain that it was not from his sister or brother. He had scheduled teleconferences with them every other day at the communications room, and they were unlikely to use unauthorized fire messages even if there was an emergency. There were other more efficient and less troublesome forms of communication nowadays between Idris and the Institutes. As soon as he got to his room, he took his stele from his night table and applied its tip to the sigil that sealed the message. As if by an invisible hand, the paper unfolded and a single sentence in a neat cursive handwriting that reminded Alec of times gone back, appeared on the page:

Alec, please come to New York; Magnus is in terrible danger and needs you.

The note was signed by Catarina Loss.


	4. Chapter 4 - The Memories of You

**The Memories of You**

"I am really not that lonely," said Magnus to the coffee mug on the kitchen counter. It was Alec's coffee mug, a simple white and indigo ceramic cup that Alec had claimed for himself when he first started coming around to Magnus' apartment all those months ago, the one that Magnus did not let anyone else use. "So, what if you left four weeks ago?" _Or, was it five?_ Magnus thought but did not ask out loud for fear that the memory of Alec – the one that seemed to be at home in every room in the apartment, the one that glanced at him from the corners of the terrace and made him jump in anticipation every time he heard someone out in the hallway – might begin to think that Magnus was losing touch with reality. "As long as I remember you, you are not really gone," he added and turned to the coffee maker on the counter, the one he bought when Alec told him that he was uncomfortable drinking the coffee that Magnus magically stole. Since Alec left, Magnus had been trying to use the machine because he missed the aroma of freshly made coffee, but so far all he had been able to produce was a concoction that resembled and tasted like tar.

More and more often since Alec left, Magnus had found himself conversing with the things that Alec left behind. In addition to this morning's conversation with Alec's coffee mug, he had had very challenging discussions about the state of affairs in the world with Alec's toothbrush in the bathroom and debated music with one of Alec's t-shirt hanging in the closet. He knew, of course, that anyone listening to his chatter would think that he was losing his marbles. It was just that his memories of Alec had become relentless companions, companions that spoke loudly in their silence. The memories were intrusive and unavoidable presences that seemed to occupy more space in his house than Alec, with his quiet, shy and unassuming manner, ever had.

He was about to ask Alec's coffee mug what it thought of the unusually wet weather they were having when the buzzer rang alerting him that someone was downstairs wanting to see him. He pushed the bottom that released the door without bothering to check who it was. There was only one person who would so unceremoniously interrupt his coffee so early in the morning.

"I came to see if you are still talking to the furniture Magnus," Catarina said when Magnus opened his front door a few seconds later. On her way in she handed him a paper bag, Ess-a-Bagel printed on its sides, and the aroma of freshly baked bread emanating from its interior. Catarina had started coming over every couple of days since Magnus called her to tell her that Alec had left, showing up at his door with take-out after work, even though she was usually exhausted after a twelve-hour shift; offering to stay to watch TV or to go to a movie, even though she preferred the theatre and the opera; or inviting him for a walk at the park or for a drink, even though she wasn't much of a walker or a drinker.

"I don't talk to the furniture," Magnus replied, in a tone of indignation that sounded insincere even to his ears. "And why are you here? I thought you were on the day shift."

"That was last week," she replied and looked at Magnus with undisguised concern; "this week I am on the night shift. I told you that when I called yesterday, don't you remember?"

"Of course, I remember," Magnus replied even though, for some reason, he wasn't completely certain he did. "Anyway, to what do I owe this honor?"

"I thought we could have breakfast before I go home and sleep the day away, and I wanted to know how you were holding up," she replied as she made her way to the kitchen, grabbed two mugs from the cupboard and using a simple spell made coffee materialize out of thin air. Catarina refused to drink what she called the "experiment" that Magnus made in Alec's coffee maker arguing that she was exposed to enough biological hazards at the hospital; she didn't need to be poisoned by Magnus. Magnus sat across from her, took a bagel from the brown bag Catarina had handed him and began to break small pieces out of it and put them in his mouth, pretending more than actually eating it.

As she put sugar in her coffee and spread cream cheese and jam on her bagel, Catarina talked about her shift at the emergency room. Magnus listened in silence, glad for both the company and her friend's lack of expectations that he participates in the conversation. When he looked at Catarina, he saw just how tired she was. His friend was strong, probably the strongest person he knew, and she liked her job at the hospital, but night shifts were hard on her and it was obvious that she was sleep deprived. _She needs a vacation_ , he thought and wondered whether Alec would mind if he took Catarina to Paris, or perhaps even Peru for a few days. But then he remembered that Alec was gone, that he was free to go wherever he wanted, and suddenly felt no desire to go anywhere. _What is wrong with you?_ He asked himself not for the first time as his gaze drifted towards the window, Catarina's chatter becoming no more than background noise. Getting away, changing scenery, had always been his way of dealing with painful breakups. He had left London soon after his epic breakup with Camille and there had been Peru all those centuries ago. Travelling had always been a good remedy for heartbreak, but now he felt no desire to go anywhere.

Perhaps the reason was that the more Magnus thought of an adventure that could take his mind off Alec, the more he realized that there was nothing left in the world, safe for perhaps going out in space, that he had not already tried, no places left to see, no adventures left to go on. He had lived so long, seen so much, met so many people, done so many things that when he searched for something new to do, to look forward to, he could not think of anything. Life had become terribly predictable, unsurprising, unappealing, and wandering the world no longer exited him. In the last few weeks, in fact, he had found himself more than once thinking that he had lived too long, and that life no longer held any promises. He knew, of course, that it was dangerous for an immortal to feel this way but, hard as he tried, he could not snap out of it.

"How are you really doing Magnus?" Catarina asked from across the kitchen counter after a moment of silence in which she observed Magnus with the attention she usually reserved for her moribund patients. Magnus, who had been silently looking out the window with a lost expression, turned to look at her and, for a moment, Catarina thought that he had forgotten that she was there.

"I am fine," he replied as he had answered the hundreds of times his friend had asked the same question in the last few weeks. Except for asking how he was doing, she never asked directly about Alec and waited for Magnus to talk if and when he was ready. But Magnus knew that Catarina – his one friend that never seemed to concern herself about anyone other than her patients, the one with the tough exterior and the sharp remarks – was seriously worried about him.

"Magnus, why don't you call the Nephilim boy once and for all and stop moping around the house?" Catarina suddenly and pointedly asked, breaking their unspoken agreement not to talk about Alec. "You are miserable, and I am getting tired of seeing you sulk and do nothing about it."

"I do not mope or sulk," Magnus replied barely feigning outrage, "and as I told you, Alec is in Idris where there are no phones. Besides, he did something unforgivable."

"First of all, Magnus, the lack of phones has never stopped you before. Come on, you are an all-powerful warlock and you were born before telephones even existed! If you wanted to get in touch with Alec, or portal to Idris, you could do it no matter what kind of mundane obstacles, angelic wards or demonic magic tried to stop you. Second of all, you know very well that Alec kissing that other Shadowhunter barely counts as a mistake and that you forgave him even before he took a step out of this apartment. You know, and I know, that was not the reason you asked him to leave." Catarina gave Magnus one of her schoolmaster stares, a stare with the power of freezing a boiling volcano.

"And what, I pray, do you think is the reason I asked him to leave?" Magnus asked, trying once again for outrage, but coming out more wounded than angry.

"You got cold feet!" she replied, her voice gaining in intensity with every syllable. "You realized that what you feel for the boy is more powerful and profound than anything you have ever felt before for anyone. That terrified you, so you did what you always do: find a reason to run away. I know you Magnus. Please don't do this to yourself, or to the Nephilim boy, neither of you deserves it. Alec loves you and you love him. Do you know how rare it is to find someone who loves you as much as you love them? Why are your throwing that love away?"

Magnus realized that this was the longest speech Catarina had ever given him about Alec. In fact, since he first started going out with the Shadowhunter, except for a few sarcastic remarks about Magnus' getting involved with a Nephilim, his friend had remained rather silent on the matter of his recent love life. This was also the first time that she had expressed any positive thoughts on his relationship with Alec. And, there was a wistful tone to her voice, a tone that reminded Magnus that Catarina had loved in the past and that she had not always been loved back or accepted for who she was.

"You don't understand," he replied, giving up on sounding outrageous and letting sadness color his words. "Alec wanted to move in, he wanted to build a life with me, but he was having issues with my immortality, with the fact that I have shared other lives before. I saw the signs, Catarina. I wanted him to move in. I wanted it with all my heart, but what if he realizes in a few months or years that he cannot do it? What if one day he regrets being with someone like me, someone who is half demon?

"Let me get this straight," Catarina interrupted him. "You wanted him to move in, but instead you pushed him away. And, you didn't want to lose him, so instead you left him. I thought you were contrarian, Magnus, but this one takes the cake!" she added throwing her hands up in the air in a gesture of evident frustration.

"He went off and kissed someone else!" Magnus added, fully aware that he was grasping at straws. "I promised myself after Camille that I would not put up with infidelity."

"Is that really the reason Magnus?"

Magnus looked down at the bagel on the counter, the one he had been systemically destroying with his fingers. "Did you know that I am Alec's first relationship, first everything, Catarina?" he asked with a sigh after a long moment of silence. "That is scary. How do I know that he will not realize one day that he is missing out in life by committing himself to me?"

"So, to avoid potential heartbreak you put up your defenses and pushed him away," Catarina stated. "No wonder the poor boy went off the rails. What scares you so much?"

"I couldn't stop thinking that if he stayed, one day I would lose him. He would either leave or die one day. I don't think I can lose one more person I love, Catarina. I just can't. I don't know if…"

"In the centuries that we have been friends," Catarina interjected, her voice full of sadness, "I have learned that the loneliness and loss that are unavoidable conditions of immortality have always been hard for you. You don't do well when you lose people because underneath all that glitter, makeup and hairspray, you have a tender heart, and every time you fall in love, you give all of yourself. But the fear of loneliness and loss is no reason to avoid loving someone, Magnus, especially if they love you back. You know what happens when immortals like us begin to push people away, when we stop searching for connection, when we stop caring. I am worried about you, Magnus. You know what I am talking about; you are too young still to go there."

"I will be fine, Catarina," Magnus said, trying his best to reassure his friend. "You'll see; I will be back to my own self before you know it. Now, stop fretting, go home and get some sleep. Sleep deprivation is horrible for your complexion."

"I have work as an excuse; what is your excuse?" Catarina rebuked, trying, Magnus knew, to sound facetious.

They spoke of other things for a few more minutes until Catarina finished her coffee and then Magnus walked her to the door.

"Please listen to me, Magnus, and call Alec," she said again before she left. "You are lucky to have someone who loves you. Do not waste your time second guessing Alec's intentions. And call me if things get bad."

"I will call you if I start climbing the walls, I promise," Magnus said and, taking Catarina by surprise, hugged her.

Once Catarina was gone, Magnus went to sit by the window and watched her as she left his building and walked off down the street towards the subway. Catarina, as usual, saw right through him. The intensity of his feelings for Alec had frightened him; they have come on so fast that they had caught him by surprise. It was as if Alec had exerted some magic over him; as if Alec had awoken something deep inside Magnus that had been dormant all his life; as if in his usual quiet and stealthy way, Alec had managed to jump over all the walls he had erected around his heart. By the time Magnus realized what was happening, Alec had already staked a claim on his heart, his life and his soul. In fact, Magnus had been hopelessly in love even before Alec had kissed him for the first time. And how not to be? Since that night that he stood at his front door, looking like the dear in the headlights and unable to think of an excuse for being there, Alec had slowly but with surprising determination managed to disarm and surprise Magnus at every turn.

Magnus had been with many people, men and women, downworlders and mundanes. He had been the initiator or had taken the driver seat in many of those relationships. But he had never been with a Nephilim, and certainly not with one so innocent, someone still discovering who they were. With Alec, he had felt compelled to be gentle, to not push too hard or fast. Slowing things down had surprisingly allowed him to enjoy the pleasure of slowly discovering the taste and feel of Alec's lips, the scent of Alec that was particularly strong in the hollow of his collarbone, the playful and rather tentative way in which Alec planted kisses up and down his neck. Each gentle touch of Alec's lips had awakened every nerve ending in Magnus' body.

Magnus had also rejoiced in the sensation of Alec's hair between his fingers, and the way in which thousands of goosebumps rose on Alec's skin when Magnus kissed and whispered little sweet things in his ear. New love was wonderful, full of discoveries, of new touches, tastes and aromas, and Magnus had endeavoured to enjoy each new sensation without expectations or haste, and in the process, he had handed the wheel of their relationship over to Alec.

Taking things slow had been more pleasurable that Magnus ever imagined. It was like stepping to the edge of an abyss and feel the anticipation one feels just before jumping; it was like seeing and smelling a particularly exquisite morsel of food but stopping just before taking a bite. It was delayed gratification taken to such an extreme that it, itself, became pure pleasure. When Alec went home every night, Magnus remained with his heart in suspense, and he spent the time until their next meeting in a constant state of aroused anticipation.

Alec had been, from the start, easy to love: gentle, curious and generous. As he gained confidence in his relationship with Magnus, he had become more audacious, taking more risks, testing, at times, his own limits. Despite their differences in age and experience, he could not help being protective of Magnus, always making sure not to do anything that Magnus did not like, always asking if Magnus was okay. That quality had softened even more Magnus' heart, for he could not remember the last time someone had treated him with such tenderness. He was a powerful warlock and most people expected things from him: services to which they felt entitled and for which they seldomly felt compelled to be thankful. Rarely, had he been at the receiving end of the kind generosity, tenderness and care that Alec so freely and naturally offered him. And now Magnus had sent Alec away and it was as if the ground under his feet had crumbled and there was nothing stopping him from plummeting into the abyss. Without Alec, Magnus felt adrift.

"You need to get out of this apartment," Catarina had told him the first time she found him talking to the empty room. Magnus had reassured her that he was fine, and that he had been going out, and in truth, he had. A couple of days after Alec left for Idris, he had called some old friends and gone out with them for drinks, dancing and even to a show. He had repeated to himself the mantra that he had used many times before: that he was immortal, and immortals should not get bogged down by the comings and goings of those who have fleeting and short lives; that this was not his first heartbreak and would likely not be his last, and that the sooner he got over it, the better for everybody.

Yet, Magnus couldn't shake the memories of Alec even when he was out. They sat with him at the bar; they moved with other shadows on the dance floor; and reached to take a morsel from Magnus' plate the way Alec always did. And, every time Magnus returned to his apartment, the memories of Alec were waiting for him, smiling at him from the sofa, lying on the side of the bed that Alec always occupied, whispering to him in his sleep. Memories of Alec were everywhere in his apartment, just out of sight of visitors. They were relentless, distracting him when Magnus tried to work and meddling in his conversations with clients. They invaded every corner of his life taking the joy out of doings the things he had always enjoyed doing. So, Magnus had decided that he wasn't jet ready to be out or to move on, that there was no use trying to outrun the memories. Instead, he surrendered to their tyranny and resigned himself to live with them until they too decided to leave as Alec had done.

Even now, as soon as Catarina left, the memories of Alec came out of their hiding places and began once again to occupy every nook and cranny of the apartment. There was Alec standing by the window smiling at something Magnus had said, the morning light forming a halo around him that made him look even more like an angel. There was Alec in the kitchen washing dishes or searching for something in the fridge, and on the sofa leaning against him, the way he had done during so many evenings spent together.

There was Alec walking through his front door, silent and with determined steps, taking Magnus' hand and kissing him for the first time, that first unforgettable kiss, that kiss that burned like fire at the same time that it caressed his soul with the touch of an angel's wings. And then, there was Alec that night a few weeks later when they had been kissing on the couch, Magnus' hands tightly fisted in Alec's shirt holding on as if Alec was a life raft and he was adrift in the ocean. Alec had stood up suddenly and had extended his hand towards Magnus. "Take me to bed, Magnus," he had said, and the surprise had been such that Magnus had to exert an inordinate amount of self-control to stop the glamor under which he concealed his warlock mark from burning away. "Are you sure?" Magnus had asked. "There is no rush; we can take things slow."

"I want you Magnus with all my heart, body and soul," Alec had replied, "I have never been with anyone before, and I may not know how to be with you, but I am willing to learn if you are willing to teach me."

The words had burned down the last of the wards Magnus had erected to protect himself. For Alec was putting himself in Magnus' hands, and in the process showing such trust, generosity and openheartedness, that Magnus knew he would do everything in his power and more to never betray the trust that Alec was placing on him.

"You don't have to do anything you don't want to or with which you are uncomfortable, Alexander," Magnus had said, taking the hand Alec proffered. "There is no need to rush into things."

It had been Alec the one to guide Magnus by the hand towards the bedroom. "I trust you, Magnus," he had said, "and you can trust me; I will not do anything to hurt you."

That night, Alec had slowly but with determination and increasing passion peeled Magnus' clothes off, planting gentle kisses, savouring him, running soft fingers along his skin as he disrobed Magnus not only of his clothes but also of the last remnants of his defenses. Alec's touches had been light but also full of heat, and he had mapped the geography of Magnus' body as if Magnus was a newly discovered and virgin land and Alec its first explorer.

Magnus had done the same in return, and as he touched Alec's skin for the first time – the curves and plains of his bare chest and back, the hard and strong muscles of his legs and arms – he had felt that he was the luckiest man alive. That night, Alec and Magnus had made magic together, each offering himself to the other without reservation or inhibition, each taking and giving without expectation or greediness. Until then, Magnus had thought that relationships, specially relationships between men required certain amount of negotiation, a moment in which power, control and surrender were asserted or decided. But with Alec, nothing of the sort was necessary. For from the very beginning, theirs had been a relationship between equals, in which each gave themselves to the other with a generosity and reciprocity that increased the pleasure exponentially.

When hours later, Magnus had finally collapsed on top of Alec, his breath coming out in loud and ragged gasps, his body trembling uncontrollably, his mind clouded, he had felt that Alec had just taken him to the very gates of heaven. "Are you okay Magnus?" Alec had asked between ragged breaths of his own as he wrapped his arms protectively around Magnus, his body also trembling from the aftershocks of their shared climax. "Did I hurt you?"

Magnus had looked at Alec with surprise and seeing the shine and the look of concern in his eyes, had felt an uncontained desire to pour his heart out, to tell Alec that even though he had had sex thousands of times, he had never truly made love before until that night. He wanted to tell Alec that after hundreds of years of searching, he had finally found a home in his arms. But not wanting to burden Alec with confessions that he might think were too premature, he had simply kissed him.

After that first time, they had spent many nights and even days in bed getting to know one another, talking, laughing and, of course, making love with increasing hunger, longing and desire, and each one of those unforgettable moments were now replying all around Magnus as if time, past and present, had melted into one.

So stubborn and relentless were Magnus' memories of Alec that they had a will of their own. Lately, they were no longer content with invading his house just by themselves. They also invited other memories and, suddenly, the room was full of people, ghosts from times gone by, figures dressed in Victorian clothes, in intricate Georgian fashion, and in the low waisted dresses and bobbed hairstyles of the 1920s, sometimes speaking all at once, evoking memories Magnus had not recalled in decades and centuries.

In the late 1920s, Magnus spent some time in Spain, and there he met and became friends with Salvador Dali, the painter. On one long evening of shared wine, Magnus and Dali talked "hypothetically" about what it would mean to be immortal, about the weight of carrying an ever-growing baggage of memories of times, places and people long gone. Sometime later, Dali painted his most famous work – the Persistence of Memory, and years later, through a friend he had in the art world, Magnus managed to arrange for the painting to be brought to New York. Every once in a while, Magnus visited the painting now at the Museum of Modern Art and every time he saw it, he thought that no one had ever captured what it meant for an immortal to remember the way Dali had.

Now as the memories of Alec invited others to join them, the present became full of the past, the future disappeared, and time melted away like the watches in his friend Salvador's painting. Seconds became decades full of memories, and hours a millennium of times gone by, of lost loves and lives, of places left behind. Magnus who had promised himself centuries ago that no matter how much loss he experienced, he would always look towards the future, that he would never let the sorrows of the past weight him down, began, because of the memories of Alec, to live in a place full of the past, floating in a sea of remembrance, unaware of time or space, frozen, immobile, petrified like a tree which roots had dug deep underground.

After three days of calling Magnus without an answer, of finding his door locked and warded every time she came by, in a state of anxiety, Catarina decided to use a spell to break through the wards around Magnus' apartment and enter. She hoped to find it empty, perhaps a note on the table letting her know that Magnus had finally decided to take her advice and go after Alec. However, her hopes were quickly crushed. As soon as she opened the door, she knew that her concerns had been warranted. For there was Magnus, sitting by the window, wearing the same clothes he had been wearing the last time she saw him, his eyes milky, his blind gaze lost in the distance, a dark magic shroud covering him like the web of a sinister spider, keeping him suspended in time and space. As she had feared the last time she saw him, her friend had surrendered to the malady that afflicted so many warlocks when they felt they have nothing left to live for. Magnus was rapidly petrifying, his mind meandering somewhere she couldn't reach him, and Catarina feared that it might be too late, that he might be gone to a place from which there was no return.

 **Sorry it took me this long to post this. I was travelling.**


	5. Chapter 5 - Dark Magic

**Dark Magic**

Alec showered, packed his bags and was out the door before the ashes into which Catarina's fire message disintegrated had even been blown away by the breeze. His heart was pounding, adrenaline fuelling the ever-increasing anxiety that had taken hold of him, but his mind was surprisingly sharp and focused on a single thought: _Magnus needs me_. He was still buttoning up his shirt when he stepped out of his room and his hair, wet from the shower, fell in haphazard strands down his forehead, dripping water down his face and shoulders. He didn't care. He had never cared much about his appearance and now it was not the time to start.

"Where are you going?" asked Guinevere when she run into him once again in the hallway. She thought it had not been more than five minutes since she had handed him the sealed message, and now here was Alec, still wet from the shower and taking off in an obvious rush.

"There is an emergency and I need to go back to New York," he replied hastily as, with decisive steps, he started down the hallway towards the exit that led to the Guard where the only portal in Idris was located.

"Can't Jace or Isabel handle it? You still have a few weeks left of training," the Inquisitor's young assistant asked.

"No, this is a personal emergency," he replied turning back to look at her but without stopping. "I am the only one who can handle it."

"Can't it wait?"

"No, I am sorry, it can't," Alec stated. _Magnus is in trouble and needs me,_ he thought. Catarina's neatly written words echoed in his mind as if they were marbles rattling around his skull, obscuring all other thoughts but those that beckoned him to Magnus. _Magnus is in trouble,_ he repeated again in his mind as he walked out of the academy's living quarters, quickened his steps and headed up the hill towards the Guard.

Through one of the panoramic windows that surrounded the living quarters, Guinevere watched as Alec walked off almost at a run. She thought, not for the first time, that the new Head of the New York Institute was one of the handsomest and nicest men she had ever met: taller than most Nephilim she knew; lean and with a body to die for; a kind face and a dazzling smile on those occasions he did smile, which were rare; and a unpretentious attitude, as if he didn't know that he was in possession of those kinds of looks that made women, and men, turn their heads. She knew what they said about him, that he was not into girls and that he was in a committed relationship with a powerful warlock no less. But that had not stopped her from developing a terrible crush on him, and now he was leaving, and Guinevere doubted she would see him again anytime soon. Too bad, she thought as she saw him disappear into the Guard, the good ones are always either taken or unavailable.

A few minutes later, and after having threatened the Shadowhunter guarding the Idris portal with the seven fires of hell if he didn't let him pass, Alec was emerging out of a portal to the astonished face of the young recruit guarding the roof of the New York Institute. He stopped just long enough to greet the young man and ask him to please take his bag to his room, before he was off at a run again, down the stairs, pass the situation room, out the institute's front door, and down the street towards the subway and Magnus' penthouse. Jace, who at that moment was handing out patrol assignments to the Shadowhunters on duty, saw Alec walk by but his parabatai was gone even before he even had time to greet him.

Catarina wrung her hands in an attitude of evident distress as she paced back and forth in the foyer of Magnus' penthouse. Her face betrayed, not only her state of apprehension, but also the long days and sleepless nights she had spent watching over Magnus and trying to find a cure to his condition. _Magnus, stupid troublesome warlock, why didn't you call me?_ She silently asked for what was likely the thousandth time, as she turned and gazed towards the place where, surrounded by an eerie, cold and expanding gloom, Magnus sat silent and immobile. She was about to look at her wristwatch, as she had done every couple of minutes since she sent the fire message to Alec, when the doorbell rang startling her despite the fact that she had been waiting for it.

"Catarina, what happened?" Alec asked as soon as she opened the door, his apprehensive expression mirroring her own.

"Come in Alec," she replied and stepped aside to let the young man in. Calling on all her years of training as a nurse and on all the experience she had gained from the thousands of times she had had to give bad news to her patients' relatives, Catarina trained her voice and expression to remain even and calm. She knew there was no way of explaining what was happening to Magnus without showing Alec, and that there was no way to prepare the young Shadowhunter for the blow he was about to receive. The only thing she could do was to show Alec that she was there to support him and Magnus.

A shiver run down Alec's spine as soon as he stepped into the apartment, the result, not only, of the chill and darkness that had begun to overtake the normally warm and bright rooms, but also of the sinister and dark energy that seemed to permeate the very air around them. For a moment, he felt like he was walking into a demon nest and had to fight the instinct to reach for his bow and quiver. Magnus' apartment looked the same; its bright-colored furniture was in the same place he remembered; its expensive artwork and antiques still hanged from walls or laid on tables; and its windows still framed a stunning view of the New York skyline. Yet, Alec had a hard time recognizing the place in which he had spent so many wonderful days and nights with Magnus. For it seemed that a veil of dark and evil energy blanketed everything, making all colors appear dull, and keeping away the light and the heat of the spring sun. It was as if a hostile force was pushing him away, the sensation raising the hairs on the back if his neck and on his arms.

"I know exactly how you feel," Catarina said observing Alec's reaction. "I feel it too. I can barely stand being in the place. But it is safe, I promise."

"What is going on? Where is Magnus?" Alec asked, his anxiety rapidly reaching the level of panic. He took a few steps towards the living room and had to exercise all his self-control to resist the impulse to turn and run. The curtains were drawn back, and he could see through the windows that the sun shone outside. Yet, the room was plunged in shadows and resembled a cold and wet dungeon. Everything in the apartment seemed to be screaming at him to get out, as if the walls, the furniture and even the air had become alien and dangerous.

Alec's eyes swept the familiar, yet unfamiliar, room searching for the man he loved and for whom he had longed for more than six weeks. He recognized his silhouette by the window in a spot from which all the gloom that covered the room seemed to be emanating.

"Magnus," Alec called as he rushed towards the armchair in which Magnus sat, his impassive face turned towards the window, his unseeing milky eyes lost in some unknown distance. He stopped abruptly before Magnus and looked from the warlock's face to Catarina, a thousand questions written on his astonished expression. "Magnus, Magnus, I am here," Alec said softly but urgently as he crouched in front of the warlock and took his hand in his. Magnus' golden skin, so familiar to Alec, felt now cold and foreign, as if Magnus had turned into a marble sculpture, a sculpture that retained color and texture, but froze them in stone. "Magnus," he called again, and he brought his lips to Magnus' hand, planting kisses, beckoning Magnus to reply, his heart shattering a little more with every unresponsive second.

"I don't think he can hear you," Catarina softly said as she approached and placed a comforting hand on Alec's shoulder. "He is beyond the reach of your voice."

"What happened? Who did this?!" Alec asked, standing up and facing Catarina in an attitude of defiance or perhaps desperation, his voice gaining in intensity and urgency. At that moment he knew he was capable of killing whomever had done harm to Magnus, not matter who it was or what it took. Alec knew without the shadow of a doubt that he would go to the end of the earth and farther if necessary to find whomever had hurt Magnus.

"No one did this," Catarina replied. "Or rather, Magnus did."

Seeing that Alec was about to bombard her with more questions, she put her hand up to silence him and went on: "I found him like this a week ago. We, warlocks, don't know much about this condition, but we call it petrification. It happens to some of us when we have lived too long and cannot longer handle the loss, loneliness, sadness or predictability that comes with immortality; when we stop caring about life; when we stop hoping for new things. The process is rather a mystery. We very rarely talk about it and, in fact, everyone I have asked has given me some rather elusive answers. No one, as far as I know, has ever recovered from it, so what causes it and what happens to warlocks' consciousness during the process is something we don't know anything about. I have been consulting some of our texts and I have asked a few warlocks I know, but it seems that the topic remains either a taboo or the knowledge there is about petrification is covered in secrecy. All I have found out so far is conjecture."

"This happened a week ago, why did you wait until now to call me?" Alec asked, his eyes shining with yet unshed tears. "Why didn't you call me when you saw the first signs of trouble? I may have been able to stop it."

"I urged Magnus to call you, but he didn't listen. You know how stubborn and troublesome he can be," Catarina said, and her voice finally broke in the last couple of words. "I didn't think things would get so bad so fast. I kept an eye on him, visited almost every day. I truly thought he would bounce back, that this was just an episode of melancholy and that he would eventually snap out of it. I have been looking for a cure for the last week; I have tried everything I could think of, but nothing has worked and everyone I have asked has given elusive or unhelpful answers." Catarina's run her thump over her cheek to dry the tears that had rebelliously fallen down her face. The tears were not only of sadness but also of frustration; for in the last week, she had come to realize just how reluctant her people were to even speak of petrification. She even suspected that the topic was prohibited and even dangerous to pursue. After one of her contacts cautioned her against asking too many questions, and specially warned her not to ask the warlock leadership, she had decided to stop for fear that she might be stirring trouble for herself and Magnus. There was something about petrification that frightened her people, and her people with all their powers were pretty hard to frighten.

Alec felt guilty for reproaching her not calling him sooner. He didn't know Catarina very well and his dealings with her had always been mediated by Magnus. She was one of Magnus' closest friends and it was obvious that she was as upset as he was. And, she was correct: Magnus could be stubborn. What was worse, she was not the one to blame.

"Magnus is like this because of me," he said, the full weight of the guilt threatening to crush him. "I did this; I hurt him; I shouldn't have left, I shouldn't have let him send me away. I should have camped outside his door until he forgave me. I should have been here."

"Don't blame yourself, Alec," Catarina said and once again rested her hand on his shoulder. "We don't know enough about petrification to know exactly what provokes it. There is no use assigning blame right now."

Alec reached and brushed a lock of hair off Magnus' forehead, and with all his heart, he willed Magnus to look up at him and smile the way he had done so many times before. "What happens to warlocks who petrify?" he asked, crouching and taking Magnus' hand again, resisting the impulse to recoil when his hand came in contact with the warlock's icy cold skin. He had heard rumours about petrification before but had never thought of asking Magnus about it. There was so much he didn't know about warlocks and their powers, and he had always accepted that there were things about his boyfriend that would forever remain a mystery. Mystery was, after all, part of what made his relationship with Magnus special. Yet now he wished he knew more.

"We are immortal, Alec, but that doesn't mean we cannot die," Catarina said carefully, making sure Alec understood the full extent to the problem. "As I told you, warlocks don't talk much about petrification; it is a topic that everybody avoids like the plague. But there seems to be agreement on one thing: petrification eventually leads to death, or at the very least death of the body. Again, I don't know what happens to consciousness, but unable to move or feed, the body stops functioning, dries up, or turns into a sort of fossil, eventually dying. It may take weeks, months or years, but, as far as I know, all warlocks that petrify eventually die."

"What can we do to bring him back?" Alec asked, his voice no longer able to disguise his desperation.

"I am not certain we can," Catarina replied.

"What do you mean? There must be something, Catarina, anything. Just tell me what to do and I will do it. I cannot lose him, not like this, not like this, please." Alec's voice now carried all the force and despair of an imploration and his eyes finally relinquished the tears he had been holding back.

Catarina had had to give bad news to so many people in the hundred years she had been a nurse, so she recognized in Alec's voice the willfulness with which loved ones held on to hope, even when there was no hope left. "I have an idea," she tentatively stated, "but you must know that the possibility of success is very _very_ remote, and I would need to do more research before I even consider it. The results will depend on whether the little I have been able to learn about petrification is correct. So, I cannot promise anything."

"Okay, what do you need? I can get you access to the Institute's library, or I can call in some favours and get you into the Idris' central archives. Whatever you need, just tell me and I will make it happen." Alec's voice suddenly carried a determination and willfulness that convinced Catarina that Alec would do the impossible to save Magnus, no matter the consequences.

"Thank you," Catarina replied and gave Alec's shoulder a gentle and grateful squeeze. "But there is only one place where I may be able to find the information I need: the archive of the Spiral Labyrinth. The archive contains some of our most obscure and secret documents. Thus, it is hard to enter and very few warlocks are allowed access. I suspect that some trickery will be required and perhaps even some breaking and entering. Luckily, I know someone who is currently doing research there, a friend of mine and Magnus'."

"Alright, let's go then," Alec said standing up once again and facing Catarina, renewed determination in his expression and posture.

Catarina couldn't help but admire the young man's bravery. She had never been too keened on Magnus' relationship with a Nephilim, on account of her hundreds of years of experience dealing with the superior attitude, prejudice and bigotry of the Children of the Angel. At the beginning, she had been suspicious of Alec's feelings for Magnus because she had a hard time believing that the young Shadowhunter could break with thousands of years of animosity between the Shadowhunters and the Downworld. But now, as she saw Alec's eagerness to go to the end of the world to save her friend, not matter the consequences, all remaining doubts on the veracity of his love and commitment to Magnus finally dissipated.

"Very few people have ever been given access to the Spiral Labyrinth's archive, Alec," she explained. "It is heavily warded with the most powerful and destructive of magics. Only warlocks can approach or enter it, and only with permission from the Highest Warlock. Trying to access it without permission is even more dangerous. Warlocks guard their secrets fiercely and bringing a Shadowhunter along would be more an obstacle than a help."

"But you don't have permission either," Alec observed. "How are you planning to enter?"

"I am counting on my friend's help," Catarina replied, "even if she doesn't know it yet. That is why I have to go alone. I need you to stay and watch over Magnus."

"But I must do something, Catarina," Alec retorted. "I cannot just sit here."

"You will be doing something," Catarina reassured him. "Magnus should not be alone; in his current state, he is defenseless. You must look after him and protect him. Besides, I won't be long."

"You think Magnus is in danger," Alec said, a statement, not a question. At that moment, Alec realized that Catarina was concerned not just about the petrification. Something else worried her, some threat coming from elsewhere.

"I cannot be sure; call it instinct," Catarina explained. "I may be overreacting, but every time I have tried to get information in the last week I have been stonewalled and my questions have been met with rather intrusive questions in return. I am beginning to think that there is a powerful reason why warlocks refuse to speak about petrification. There is only a matter of time before other warlocks begin to wonder why Magnus is not answering calls. Let's be cautious just in case and keep Magnus' condition to ourselves. The fewer people that know, the better."

"Okay, whatever you need Catarina," Alec said, his voice resigned.

"I have set some spells that will raise protective wards around the apartment as soon as I leave," Catarina informed Alec less than an hour later as she was about to step through the portal she had just opened. "The wards may interfere with phone signals, but you and Magnus should be safe. I will contact you through fire message if I need to."

"Thank you, Catarina," Alec said and held Magnus' friend in a half embrace. "I will keep Magnus safe until you return."

As soon as the last sparkles left by the closing portal died down, the apartment was plunged in even more silence and shadows, the result, Alec thought, of the protective wards that kept all noise out as well as the ever-expanding dreariness that emanated from the place where Magnus sat. Hadn't Alec trusted Magnus implicitly, he would have been even more disconcerted by his surroundings, but he knew that Magnus would never intentionally harm him. So, he made the effort to push away the anxiety that seemed to be gripping him and fought with all his will against the impulse to leave this dreadful place. Instead, he pushed one of the armchairs next to the one on which Magnus sat.

"I guess it is just the two of us for now," he softly and lovingly said, crouching before Magnus. He smoothed the front of Magnus' red silk shirt, adjusted the many silver necklaces hanging around Magnus' neck, and brushed once again the rebellious lock of hair away from Magnus' forehead. He knew that his boyfriend cared a great deal about his appearance and even if he was not aware of his surroundings, Magnus would not like it if he didn't look his best. Catarina had told Alec that Magnus had been like this for at least a week, but nothing in his appearance seemed out of place or dishevelled. It was as if the warlock was frozen in time and place and nothing, not even dust could touch him. "I guess it would be too much to ask that you wake up for me now that we are alone," Alec said as he sat beside Magnus. "Please Magnus, wake up."

Alec knew, of course, that if Magnus had been able to hear him, he would have woken up even if just to scold him for being in his apartment uninvited. At that moment, he would have welcomed the worse of Magnus' wrath, and perhaps even the cold anger he showed him the last time they argued, if that mean that Magnus was back.

For the next several hours, Alec sat in silence, surrounded by the ever-expanding gloom that colored everything around him in a relentless shade of grey. He kept Magnus's hand in his, determined to transfer body heat to him, wishing with all his heart, his mind and his soul for Magnus to feel his presence. If his phone rang or anyone came to the door, he didn't hear them. It was like Magnus' apartment had become suspended somewhere outside reality and time. Like the impenetrable wall of thorns that surrendered sleeping beauty's castle, the penthouse had become encased in the bubble created by the dark energy emanating from Magnus.

When the shadows began to block the last remnants of daylight, he turned on a lamp and when the chill in the air began to reach the very marrow of his bones, he reached for the blanket Magnus kept on the sofa and wrapped himself in it. Alec was determined not to move or let go of Magnus' hand no matter how frigid the air around him got. If he kept losing body heat, he thought, he would activate his warming rune.

Every few minutes, Alec looked at Magnus, his face beautiful despite the white film that covered his eyes, and the vacant expression on his face. He had gazed at his golden features many times before, shyly, covertly and surreptitiously at first, more openly once he and Magnus had become involved. He had always enjoyed watching Magnus when he slept or when he was unawares, concentrating on his work or reading. Sometimes when he woke up next to Magnus in the middle of the night, he had run his fingers gently along his well-defined lips or along his brow committing to memory the warlock's features, and he had always been in awe at how strikingly attractive Magnus was. His was not a superficial beauty; it was not just the striking shape or color of his eyes, or the fashionable three-day stubble that never needed shaving, and certainly it was not the makeup, the hairstyle or the glitter. In time, Alec had learned that all those things were just part of the image Magnus projected as the High Warlock of Brooklyn; they faded in the intimacy of their time together leaving just a natural and unassuming beauty behind. No, Magnus' attractiveness was the result of possessing a good and warm soul despite the feisty, sassy and at times sarcastic image he projected.

"I am sorry, Magnus," he said with a sigh when the silence began to feel like a weight pressing against his chest, and he couldn't any longer stand the burden of his own guilt. "I behaved like an immature spoiled child. I will never forgive myself. I have no excuse, but you must know that I regretted that kiss the instant it happened. I was jealous and stupid. I couldn't stop thinking about all the men and women you have been with, all the people you have loved. I felt small and insignificant beside all those wonderful people that came before me. Magnus, my life is so insignificant, and you are so glamorous and worldly; you sparkle and shine. When you looked at me that first night we met, I felt that, for the first time, someone was really seeing me. And then, stupid me, I became insecure, I started to think about those memories of the men and women with whom you have shared your life, and I felt that I could never measure up to them."

"Please Magnus, I beg you, come back to me," Alec pleaded. "I will never forgive myself if you don't come back. Please Magnus, even if it is to scream at me and tell me that you never want to see me again. I will leave and never come back if you tell me to, but please, please wake up." Alec lifted Magnus' cold hand to his lips and, turning it, brought his nose to the inside of his wrist, searching for the familiar scent and warmth of Magnus, closing his eyes and beckoning the warlock to heed his call, wishing with all his heart to reach him in whatever place Magnus was now lost.

Many hours later, in the small hours of the morning, something called Alec's attention back to the here and now: an insistent tapping like an icepick against solid ice. He looked around the room searching for the source of the sound. He found it in a corner of the ceiling: a bird made of blood red paper, resembling origami, its beak tapping insistently against the invisible barrier of the wards Catarina had erected. Alec lifted his hand in the air signaling for the fire message to proceed to its destination. As if a small section of the invisible barrier had melted, the paper bird penetrated the protections and flew into Alec's hand, unfolding itself as it landed.

Rather than words on the page, as the paper bird unfolded, a booming voice echoed throughout the apartment, a voice that carried the force of a thousand voices reverberating in the silence.

"To all warlocks in New York, by order of Celestina Rays, the Highest of all Warlocks, and under penalty of expulsion, you are ordered to surrender Magnus Bane and Catarina Loss to the custody of the Spiral Labyrinth to stand trial for crimes against the most sacred laws of magic. Anyone harboring these fugitives will be subject to the full force of the law."

As the last echoes of the words died down, the paper in Alec's hand caught fire, red flames consuming it, its ashes blown by an invisible wind. Almost at the same time, the whole apartment began to shake as if an earthquake or a hurricane was trying to rip the whole building from its foundations. The lamps and artwork on the tables rattled and some fell, shattering in hundreds of pieces. Magnus' favourite painting fell from its place on the wall, its antique wooden frame splintering.

Alec immediately sprung to action. He stood up and in a swift and sinuous motion, reached for his bow, nocking an arrow in less than the blink of an eye. He positioned himself in a defensive posture in front of Magnus, ready to do battle with whatever was about to attack them, determined to defend Magnus with his very life. He turned in a semicircle searching for the place from where the attack might come, stopping when he faced the doorway and saw a bright silver light that began to expand in a whirlpool of energy. He thought it was a portal, but of a kind he had never seen before. It had the consistency of quick silver, the light it projected was almost blinding, and the energy emanating from it seemed determined to demolish the whole building. Suddenly, as if by a great force, two figures were thrown through the portal, crashing against the opposite wall just a split second before the portal dissipated in a last and deafening sound that forced the building back on it foundations.

Alec pointed his arrow in the direction of the one of the two figures that began to stand up. The other was obviously unconscious and resembled a rag doll thrown on the carpet.

"Wow, wow, Alec, do not shoot" said a soft female voice with an English accent. "I am Tessa Gray, a friend of Magnus; I am here to help."


	6. Chapter 6 - Speculations

**Speculations**

"I am here to help, Alec. Don't shoot," Tessa Gray repeated, her hands up, palms out, in a gesture intended to be defensive rather than offensive. She hoped that the remnants of the magic she had just mustered to open the portal would not show in silver sparkles between her fingers and that the young man training an arrow on her would not interpret her posture as a threat. Shadowhunters were generally weary of warlocks' hands, the usual conduits for their magic, but there was no other gesture Tessa could think of to reassure Alec. She wished they had had time to send a warning to Alec of their impending arrival. But alas, things had been too chaotic and any attempt at communication too risky since Catarina had appeared at the door of her small visiting scholar office at the Spiral Labyrinth ten hours ago.

She looked at the young Shadowhunter intently in the eyes, attempting to communicate in all possible ways that she was a friend. She recognized in his features and expression gestures and features of much-loved faces from times gone by – the striking eyes, black hair and fair skin, the tall and slim figure, and the warrior's bearing – and a pang of nostalgia and pain hit her. As much as possible, Tessa avoided the Nephilim because, despite the passage of time, memories of her lost Shadowhunter life still hurt her. She had not visited Magnus since she learned that he was involved with a Lightwood. She wouldn't confess to it, but she had stayed away because she feared an encounter with someone belonging to a family that brought such fond and such sad memories. She would have kept her distance for a while longer had not Catarina showed up at her door asking for help, despair written all over her face, telling her that Magnus needed them. Tessa had not thought about it twice. Magnus was one of her closest friends, a steadfast connection to times in her life in which she had been the happiest and the saddest. Magnus and Catarina were family; perhaps the only family Tessa could count on.

Alec hesitated for a moment, unsure of what to do. Meanwhile, with a low rumble, the building finally resettled on its foundations and the walls and furniture gradually ceased their shuddering. From the corner of his eye, he saw the slumped figure on the ground and recognized the blue skin and long silver hair of Catarina Loss, and decided to take a risk and trust that Catarina would not bring someone into Magnus' apartment who was not safe. Besides, the young woman in front of him with her dancing eyes and her innocent open face seemed harmless enough. So, he lowered his bow but kept his eyes fixed on the new arrival and his protective stance in front of Magnus.

Visibly relaxing and apparently deciding that Alec was unlikely to shoot her, Tessa turned, promptly lifted her arms in the air and began to wave them in swift and purposeful semicircles, blue, orange and red sparkles streaming from her fingers as she reinforced the wards that Catarina had erected around the penthouse. She then walked in the direction of the unconscious Catarina, and crouching, brought her hand gently to her brow trying to ascertain the extent of her friend's injuries. Healing had never been her speciality, but snapping her fingers, she mustered the remaining of her magic powers and sent waves of healing energy towards Catarina. After a moment, the other warlock took a deep breath and stirred, and a second later, she made to stand though she was evidently still a little disoriented.

"Take it easy, Catarina," Tessa said calmingly. "We are safe at home, but you took a nasty blast of magic to the back, and the journey through that portal was difficult."

"Have you got it?" Catarina anxiously asked looking at Tessa with still unfocussed eyes.

"I dare say that I have," Tessa replied reaching for her back where a backpack that had obviously been magically concealed suddenly solidified. From it, she produced a big old book, its dark brown leather covers worn, and its pages yellowed with age. She handed the book to Catarina who gently took it and hugged it to her chest.

Alec came to join Tessa, his initial distrust abating, and together they helped Catarina to her feet and onto the couch. As some of her strength returned, Catarina donned her usual glamour, and the blue hue of her complexion began to fade, her skin returning to her habitual dark golden tone and her hair to its usual black. Once she was settled on the sofa, Alec went to the kitchen to get a glass of water.

"Here, drink this," he said gently and handed the glass to Caterina. "What happened?" he then asked looking fixedly from one woman to the other. "I have never seen a portal that looked like that or that exerted that kind of power. I thought the building was going to crush to the ground."

"We had to open a portal capable of breaking out of a heavily warded fortress," Tessa replied. "And, we were under attack. I suspect that some of the magic they were blasting us with got caught in it. Shall we agree to never do that again?" she added turning to her friend with a conspiratorial smile and running a hand gently along her arm.

"Which part," Catarina asked beginning to sound more like herself again, "the breaking and entering, the stealing of an ancient spell book, or the escaping from a heavily warded Spiral Labyrinth?"

"All of it, I must say," replied Tessa, her smile denoting relief at seeing that Catarina was regaining some of her strength and wit.

Alec thought that Tessa's voice did not only carry the inflection of an English accent, but also the cadence of long-ago words. When he spoke of his many adventures and the many historical figures he had met along the centuries of his life, Magnus sometimes spoke in that old accent and Alec felt transported to a time of horse-drawn carriages, oil lamps, full skirts and top hats. Listening to Tessa now, Alec experienced a similar time displacement and could not help but relax a little and trust this young, quiet and apparently unpretentious woman.

Now that Catarina was safe, Tessa looked around at the dimly lighted room for the first time since their abrupt arrival. As the adrenaline that had been running through her system began to ebb, the dreariness and cold that permeated the very air around them finally hit her. "I see what you mean, Catarina," she stated as an involuntary shudder run down her spine and goosebumps rose on her skin. "There is a dark and sinister energy building up in this room."

She stood up from the sofa and walked towards Magnus who had remained completely oblivious to the shaking of the building and the arrival of his friends. "Oh Magnus, what did you do to yourself? And, why didn't you call me?" she quietly and gently asked crouching in front of Magnus, taking his hand in hers, and repeating the same questions that both Catarina and Alec had asked before.

Alec took advantage of the fact that Tessa was intent on Magnus to observe her with more attention. Magnus had mentioned Tessa many times, always in relation to shared adventures, never disclosing any of his friend's secrets. While Alec didn't know what he had expected, he knew it was certainly not a young, slim and bookish looking woman with the appearance of a librarian or an art major. Tessa wore tanned ballerina style flats tied around the ankles with thick pink ribbons, ankle-high blue jeans, a loose white cotton tuxedo shirt and an open and slightly oversize silk vest with an intricate design in grey, purple and cooper that anyone would think was a good replica of Victorian fashion, but that Alec suspected was authentically old. Her reddish-brown hair was long, and she wore it in a braid that fell down one shoulder, and her apple-face, devoid of any makeup, was the face of a young woman not older than perhaps 25 with well-defined lips and striking grey-blue eyes. Overall, the mixtures of fashions reflected in her outfit, the vintage earrings and bracelets adorning her ears and wrists, and the regal way in which she carried herself made Tessa appear ageless, as if she existed outside time and could, therefore, easily transport herself to any era. She was objectively beautiful in a way that projected both vulnerability and strength, as if innocence and experience, youth and maturity could be encapsulated in one person. Alec knew Tessa was a warlock and that in the past she had had closed relationships with the Nephilim, including members of his own family, but the particulars remained a mystery. It was hard to believe though that this young woman was over a hundred years old.

"Who were you escaping from?" Alec asked turning to Catarina after a minute of silent contemplation.

"The team of warlocks that guards the Spiral Labyrinth's archive," replied Catarina getting up and going to stand besides Magnus. She placed a hand a couple of inches above Magnus' forehead as if trying to ascertain whether Magnus had a fever. "I guess they didn't take kindly to me breaking into the archives after the Highest Warlock denied me access and stealing one of their precious books," she added gesturing to the old tome on the sofa.

"That reminds me," stated Alec and he then proceeded to recount the arrival of the red paper bird with the message directed to all New York warlocks instructing them to surrender Magnus and Catarina and warning them against harboring them.

"I am not surprised," stated Tessa, walking towards Magnus' desk by the window, and grabbing a piece of paper on which she magically scribed a few words. With a wave of her hand, she made the paper fold itself and with another, send it flying into the air. The paper hovered for a moment and then disappeared swallowed by magically conjured flames.

"Who is the fire message for?" Catarina asked.

"I am contacting Jem. I suspect Celestina will add my name to the most-wanted list as soon as she finds out that I helped you break into the archives Catarina," Tessa explained. "It is just a matter of time before they discover the reason behind our very illegal actions. If what we suspect is correct, we are in danger and magic wards will not be enough to protect us; we need Silent Brother wards."

"Am I correct to assume that you found what you were looking for?" Alec asked trying to keep his frustration in check. He didn't like being in the dark, and so far, nothing of what he had been able to ascertain from Catarina and Tess's conversation was very explicit in terms of a cure to what was afflicting Magnus. Everything sounded like conjectures and more conjectures. Furthermore, it now seemed that members of the very secretive and, by what he gathered, very powerful Spiral Labyrinth were after them. The situation seemed direr now than before and Alec was concerned that he would not be able to protect Magnus, and Magnus could obviously not protect himself. He was also getting tired of waiting, not knowing what to do, or rather unable to do anything to bring Magnus back. He was a warrior; waiting while others, not matter how powerful their magic, risked their lives was not something to which he was adept.

"We still need to do more research," replied Catarina, "but I am confident that we found the right spell book."

"Catarina must have told you that petrification is a taboo topic among warlocks," added Tessa. "It is more than a taboo really; it is rather a forbidden topic. Yet, as a result of my interest in the history and origins of warlocks and the sources of our powers, it is one of the topics I have been researching though, I must say, not always with much success. Every time I think I have found something, somehow the information eludes me, I am denied access, or told not to ask any more questions. Naturally, that has only piqued my interest even more."

Tessa joined Catarina, placing her hands above Magnus' shoulders, in a gesture that Alec thought suggested that they were examining Magnus, attempting to diagnose or identify the forces that were keeping him in his frozen state. Alec stood close by and observed them intently, not wanting to interfere but ready to step in if needs be. The faces of the two warlocks reflected a mixture of concentration, curiosity, concern and puzzlement, but they didn't seem to be in any discomfort. After a moment, tendrils of dark, grey and charcoal magic began to emanate from Magnus reaching for Catarina and Tessa's hovering hands. As they did, the color seemed to drain from the two warlocks, as if a grey film, or perhaps a dark veil was engulfing them. The room grew even colder, and the sensation of menacing danger seemed to expand. It was as if a movie that had been in full warm color a second ego had suddenly transformed into frigid black and white.

Alec had always admired the multicolor ways in which Magnus' magic manifested – red, green, blue, purple, orange – each color signaling a different force or power. His favorites were red and blue because they were the colors of the magic that sometimes escaped through Magnus's fingers when he touched Alec, and the touch was warm and cold at the same time and awoke every nerve ending on Alec's skin. The magic emanating now from Magnus was completely devoid of color and warmth, and rather than projecting energy, it seemed to be draining all color and life from the room.

"Humm," said Tessa pensively after a minute as she removed her hands.

"Do you see what I mean?" asked Catarina also removing her hands.

"Yes, this seems to correspond to what I have deduced from the pieces of information I have gathered," replied Tessa, concern and a trace of panic drawing in her face. "It is like a black hole that sucks all energy and light from its surroundings," she added meditatively. "And you say that the effect is growing stronger?"

"Yes," asserted Catarina, "it has definitely expanded in the time I was gone. I worry that in time, I might drain all energy even the energy from the wards protecting us."

"No wonder Celestina is in such a panic," Tessa said, taking a further step away from Magnus and hugging herself as if trying to stop heat, or perhaps her own powers, from escaping her.

"Guys," Alec stated, trying to call the two women's attention, his voice a bit louder than he intended. He was at the limit of his patience, and his body vibrated with the tension, desperation and panic accumulated in the ten hours of waiting. "I am going crazy here. I am not a warlock, so can you please explain in simple and complete sentences what is going on?"

"I am sorry Alec," Catarina said with a gentle and reassuring smile, as she approached Alec and placed a hand on his shoulder in a gesture meant to comfort him but that did very little to calm his anxiety. "I know this is hard, but we are also trying to understand this thing. Let's sit down and we will explain what we know so far." She then gestured for Alec and Tessa to sit on the couch, some distance away from Magnus and the dark shadows surrounding him. "I need a coffee," she added, and with a hand gesture, summoned three mugs from a kitchen cabinet and magically filled them with hot dark liquid. "Tea for you Tessa?" She asked adding milk to Tessa's cup.

The three of them sat wrapping their hands around their mugs, trying to gather warmth. The temperature in the apartment kept going down and soon, Alec suspected, would be as cold inside as the dark late winter night was outside. He had never felt alone when he was with Magnus. Magnus could be lively, glamourous, and sometimes bigger than life. Yet, the intimacy of the time and space they shared was generally quiet and he and Magnus could sit for hours in silence each reading a book or the news or listening to music. The private Magnus could be so different from the public one: quieter, gentler, tender. It was as if behind closed doors Magnus shed the High Warlock costume and became just Magnus, young, loving, vulnerable somehow. However, the last ten hours spent with an immobile and distant Magnus and surrounded by ever-expanding sinister shadows and cold now made Alec glad to have company, to not be alone with Magnus.

"This is what we know," Tessa began, in the tone of a scholar explaining a new and yet unproven hypothesis. "And, I must clarify that a lot of it is speculation. I just hope the spell book we stole will confirm our assessment and provide an answer. The hypothesis that makes the most sense to me proposes that petrification is a disease caused by a weakness in our magic immune system, if you will. That weakness allows for a sort of evil infection to creep into our system and take control of our powers. As it takes hold, the infection lures the affected warlock into a darkness more profound than any we know cutting them off from reality. The infection causes the darkest and most demonic and sinister part of our magic to take over, feeding on the power and energy of our darkest thoughts and memories while keeping us in a state of permanent inertia. As it expands, it begins to also drain energy from the surroundings, becoming a sort of black hole that drains all magic from the environment."

"Warlocks do not produce magic Alec," added Catarina noticing the look of puzzlement on Alec's face. "We feed on the forces of nature around us, the good and the bad, the dark and the light, and manipulate them to accomplish what we want. Petrification seems to turn warlocks into a sponge that attracts, absorbs and eventually converts those forces into something else, something evil and dark. We cannot be sure, but it is conceivable that the petrifying warlock becomes a conduit that allows demonic forces to reach into our realm and feed on the energy we usually master for our magic."

"What happens when all the energy is drained or converted?" Alec asked wistfully looking towards Magnus.

"We are not sure yet," replied Tessa. "What I do know is that petrification terrifies our people so much that the Spiral Labyrinth has a team of warlocks whose sole mission is to stop anyone from learning about petrification and, I suspect, to make petrifying warlocks disappear before the disease takes its course. Magnus is in danger," she declared looking at Alec with an intensity meant to make sure the Shadowhunter understood the whole extent and urgency of the situation, or perhaps to give him a way out if he thought he had become too involved in a problem that didn't concern him.

At that moment, a blue and green paper butterfly appeared in a corner of the ceiling, fluttering its wings gently as if wanting to call attention but without making any noise. Tessa lifted her hand in a gesture that mirrored Alec's earlier gesture towards the red paper bird. The butterfly gently penetrated the wards and made its way to Tessa's hand, unfolding as soon as it landed. Tessa read the fire message, a suggestive smile drawing on her lips, as if the words were written in a secret code that imbued them with double meaning. She then folded the paper, and as she did, a slight tremor shook the room and the pressure in the air suddenly changed, as if the whole apartment had been submerged in deep dark waters. The silence became even more profound, and the city lights visible through the widows turned even more faint and distant as if now barely visible through a thick hazy glass.

"Jem has added concealment and protection wards on top of the ones already in place," Tessa explained. "He will keep watch and continue reinforcing the wards from the outside as we do the same from the inside. We are safe for now."

"Alright, what now?" Alec asked, the information about dark memories, evil infections, magic black holes swimming in his mind, and a thousand unanswered questions in the tip of his tongue.

"Now Alec, we must find a way to cure your troublesome boyfriend," said Tessa with a reassuring smile.


	7. Chapter 7 - Into the Shadows

**Into the Shadows**

"Aldous Nix was a conniving evil maniac, but no one can deny that he was also a powerful and knowledgeable warlock genius," Tessa stated, her eyes fixed on the spell book in her hands and a reluctant admiring smile on her lips. "And that he kept excellent notes," she added turning to Alec and Catarina who at that moment were walking into the room. She noticed the sorrowful look in Alec's face, the last vestiges of the tears that he had obviously attempted to wipe off, and the bleary eyes, evidence of grief, guilt and, she suspected, exhaustion.

Alec had silently walked out of the room a while ago, leaving Catarina and Tessa to their research. The two warlocks had not noticed his absence, engrossed as they were in their search for a way to unlock the secrets of the spell book they had stolen from the Spiral Labyrinth. Catarina had gone in search of him when she noticed that it had been a while since the last time he had spoken. She had found him sitting on the edge of Magnus' enormous bed, his face in his hands, the weight of the weeks of absence, and the last several hours of waiting and watching over Magnus bending his back.

"Catarina, I beg you, give me something to do, anything," he had pleaded in response to Catarina's suggestion that perhaps he should lie down for a while. She was worried that despite his stamina runes, Alec was at the limits of his strength. "I cannot sit idly any longer. I have to do something. I cannot watch Magnus slip further and further away without doing anything."

"You need to rest, Alec," she had insisted. "You will be of no use to Magnus exhausted."

"I can't," the Shadowhunter had replied. "Remorse does not let my mind rest. I did this, I caused this."

"Yes, you did," Catarina had replied sharply, exhaustion and apprehension interfering with her capacity to hold her temper in check. She was not the most patient person at the best of times, and Magnus had always said that her filter was somewhat non-existent. Seeing the despondent and wounded look that Alec gave her, she wished her sharp tongue had not gotten the best of her once again, and that she could take the words back, but it was too late. The thoughts were already out, and it was better to push through and say what was in her mind. "You are lucky to have Magnus, Alec. He is a wonderful, loyal and generous man. When he loves, he does so with all his heart. Do you know how hard it is for an immortal to risk their heart every time they fall in love, to know without the shadow of a doubt that no matter the outcome, all love will end in loss and heartbreak? Why do you think we shy away from love? Why do you think we put such a hard facade or hide behind glittery and nonchalant exteriors? We do because love for us always hurts. But precisely because love hurts, and we try hard not to be taken by love, when we do fall, we fall hard in love; we love without reservation."

She tried to ignore the tears that threatened to scape Alec's eyes and pushed on. "It doesn't matter what you think Magnus did or said to you, Alec. You behaved like a spoiled child. You went into a temper tantrum because you couldn't deal with the fact that Magnus had a life before you and, by so doing, you did to Magnus what he would have never done to you. You hurt my friend," she affirmed, emphasising each of the last words to make sure Alec understood their significance. "No matter how you think you were wronged, it was you the one who did the wronging and there is no excuse for that."

"Yes," Alec replied, his voice low and full of emotion. He looked down as his hand folded on his lap in a gesture of constriction. "Yes," he repeated, "of course you are right. I have tried to excuse my behavior, but it has no excuse. There is nothing I can say that can justify my actions."

"We may be immortal, and we may have magic, but we are not indestructible. You thought that immortality was hurting you. You never stop to think how much of a burden it is to us," added Catarina. She realized, of course, that her words contained more than just anger towards Alec. They contained the accumulated resentment she felt towards all those she had met in the centuries of her life who couldn't see beyond the image of the powerful warlock, who couldn't understand the weight of immortality, and the burden of carrying demon blood in your veins.

"Catarina," Alec said, looking up into the warlock's eyes, his voice carrying a mixture of determination and guilt, "you have to believe that I love Magnus with my body, heart and soul. If we get him back and he allows me to, I will spend the rest of my life atoning for my mistake."

"I believe you," said Catarina. "But you must also know that Magnus is, first and foremost, my friend and that if he decides not to forgive you, I will not do anything to try to change his mind. There are hundreds of years of distrust between your people and mine," she went on, more harshness in her voice than she had originally intended. It was as if a dam was breaking and an uncontained anger which depth she had misjudged was spilling out. "I have given you a chance because Magnus loves you, but don't push your luck and think I will overlook another blunder on your part. Magnus's love is a rare gift. Do not squander it, or you will lose more than his respect."

Alec nodded in understanding, his eyes fixed on Catarina as if conveying that he appreciated the full meaning of her words. At that moment, he realized that Catarina's friendliness towards him had been her way of supporting Magnus and he respected her even more for it. Her loyalty was so unwavering that she had looked beyond the differences that separated the Nephilim and Lilith's Children, the long history of mistreatment and abuse, the bigot and disparaging mindset of his people in order to support her friend. "I will do whatever it takes to regain yours and Magnus' trust," he stated, his words acquiring the tone of a solemn oath.

"It is not my trust that should concern you. You have not yet seen an angry powerful warlock like Magnus," she stated, her voice a little less harsh, a smile involuntarily suggesting itself at the corners of her mouth. She couldn't help it. She believed that Alec's remorse was genuine. He was young and, unlike many of the Nephilim she had met, he seemed to carry his heart in his sleeve. "Anyway," she went on, "I think we are close to unlocking the secrets of the spell book." Catarina hoped the assertion was accurate, and that she was not overestimating hers and Tessa's abilities.

The spell book had proven reluctant to relinquish its secrets. Powerful spells hid its darkest contents behind almost unintelligible cyphers and obscure magic safeguards. More than once in the last few hours, Catarina had had to restrain her impulse to go and shake Magnus awake. After all, out of the three of them, Magnus was the expert in deciphering obscure texts and unravelling complicated locking and disguising spells. Deciphering the spell book was like trying to extract water from solid rock. In fact, it had taken them more than an hour just to learn that the book had once belonged to Aldous Nix, the ancient, enigmatic and now deceased former High Warlock of Manhattan.

Catarina and Tessa had tried everything they could think of: powerful counter spells, unlocking magic symbols, an old plain dictionary, and even some of the tricks that mundane archivists used to decipher hieroglyphs in ancient texts. Their latest attempt was a potion that Tessa had concocted using the blood of a demon, crushed shell of a dragon's egg, a powder made from the desiccated heart of a fairy and some other ingredients that Tessa had produced from an old bottle she carried in her backpack and that she indicated that she rather not describe or discuss. The resulting concoction was a mass that resembled mud and that hissed and turned into black smoke as soon as the spell book was submerged in it.

Tessa had not been raised a warlock and, in fact, she had learned she was a magic-maker rather late in life. She was unique among her kind, the offspring of a demon and an unmarked Nephilim and, thus, she carried the blood, magic, creative and destructive powers of both species. She had also lived among the Nephilim for many years. Perhaps because of her upbringing and her association with the Children of the Angel, magic of any kind had never been a significant part of her life, and she had certainly never shown any interest in, or affinity for, dark magic. Catarina, on her part, had always shied away from the dark arts, preferring healing and mending over any magic that could be at all destructive. Yet, now they had had to resort to dark magic to unlock the secrets of the book they hoped would help them save their friends. Catarina still felt the effects of the baleful spell on her. It was as if she had just dipped her hands in putrid mud.

Thankfully, as she now walked back into the living room, Alec a step behind her, Tessa's face and words suggested that the potion had worked and that they had finally unlocked Aldous Nix's book of spells.

"Who is Aldous Nix?" asked Alec as he approached Magnus and brushed a lock of hair away from his forehead, a loving expression on his face, an expression that Tessa thought illuminated his whole face and erased some of the sadness from a second ago. The expression reminded her of the way her beloved Will's face had illuminated when he looked at her.

"Aldous Nix was a very ancient and, thus, very powerful warlock," replied Tessa. "I never met him, but by all accounts, he was at least two thousand years old when he died in a magic spell that went terribly wrong during the 1920s."

"Unfortunately, I did meet him," added Catarina. "He was a nasty character who dabbled in the darkest of crafts: necromancy, black spells, curses capable of killing, or worse, of transfiguring people into monsters, demonic summoning, pestilent potions, Satanism, blood bindings, and what mundanes call left-hand path. In sum, Aldous was into the kind of magic that taps into the most malevolent of forces, the kind of magic that got many of our people in trouble in the past, landing us in witch-hunts and trials that cost many warlocks their lives."

"It seems," added Tessa, "that after his death, the Spiral Labyrinth confiscated his belongings including his book of spells which they have zealously guarded ever since."

"What does he or his book have to do with petrification?" Alec asked still standing beside Magnus, apparently unconcerned about the dark forces that emanated with increasing intensity from the warlock.

"According to his book," Tessa replied, carefully flipping back through some pages of the old book in her hands, the pages sounding both brittle and heavy as Tessa handled them, "Aldous studied and experimented with petrification and kept detailed notes. If there is a way to reverse Magnus' condition, I am convinced we will find it in this book. We still need to do some deciphering and research, but I am confident we will find something."

"Okay," said Alec with a sigh that sounded reluctantly hopeful. He barely dared nurture hope. Things still looked dire and an old book written by a maniac warlock who dabbled in necromancy was hardly reason for optimism but at least it was something, not a light at the end of the tunnel yet, but at least the promise of a light.

"That is a very dangerous proposition," stated Tessa a few hours later, as she paced back and forth along the length of Magnus' living room. "Are you sure Catarina that is what Aldous wrote?"

"Yes," replied Catarina from where she was sitting at Magnus' worktable where Aldous' book now rested, her face showing exhaustion and resignation, "it is apparently the only way that Aldous found. We have no other choice but to believe that it is the only one that exists."

"What does the book say?" enquired Alec who at that moment was at the kitchen counter making coffee and toast for everybody. He was not hungry, but Catarina had insisted that he needed to eat and after several hours of non-stop work, he suspected the two warlocks were in need of coffee and food. The light that barely filtered through the window suggested that it was morning again. He had finally fallen asleep in the early hours, on the armchair beside Magnus, lulled by the low and sometimes unintelligible conversation of the two warlocks, exhausted after almost 48 hours without sleep. He had tried to keep up with Tessa and Catarina, but his limited knowledge of magic, spells and warlock powers had made the conversation sound foreign as if it was being held in a strange language. In more than one occasion, he had kicked himself for not having asked Magnus to explain magic to him, and he had wished with all his heart to have the opportunity to undo that oversight. At the end, the long watch, and the undeniable effects of the draining powers emanating from Magnus had finally gotten the better of Alec and he had fallen into a restless sleep. He had woken up a couple of hours later, his hand cold from holding Magnus' frigid hand, still exhausted.

"In the last centuries of his life," started Catarina, "Aldous was obsessed with opening a portal to pandemonium in order to journey there, to go back, as he argued, to the place where he truly belonged. Petrification was apparently one of the methods he explored."

"According to his notes and the research we have conducted," Tessa continued, "during petrification, warlocks get trapped in their minds while dark forces feed on their memories and fears, weakening their immune system, and using them as a conduit between this realm and another. It seems," she went on, "that he discovered a way to enter the mind, to go, if you will, to the place where petrification traps the affected warlock."

"Something happened during one of those experiments though," Catarina observed, her eyes following her finger as it pointed to a passage on the book, "something that scared him deeply, and that made him abandon the experiment. However, he did leave detailed notes about the procedure."

"And you think that by going into Magnus' mind, we can bring him back," Alec said, the words meant to sound both as a question and a statement.

"Aldous never tried to bring anyone back from petrification," replied Tessa, "but his notes do suggest that he made contact with the warlocks he studied."

"Okay, how do we replicate Aldous' experiment?" asked Alec, trying not to hope, but failing. This was the something to do he had been praying for, the light at the end of this very dark tunnel. The possibility of finding a cure to the disease that kept Magnus frozen in time and place, his eyes unseeing, his mind lost in some unknown distance or, worse, trapped in some unimaginable hell, increased the sense of urgency that had kept him at the edge of his seat since this whole ordeal began.

"The process requires a carefully balanced and rather volatile combination of potions and spells," said Catarina cautiously.

"But do we have what we need?" asked Alec handing cups of coffee to the two women and refusing to acknowledge the look of concern in Catarina's face.

"I would need to contact Jem and ask him to send us a few things," replied Tessa, "and we need to still decipher the spells Aldous used, but I think so."

After a few more speculations, the two warlocks returned to their work, while Alec divided his attention between making and bringing them breakfast, keeping an eye on Magnus, watching for any change in his condition, and listening to Tessa and Catarina's low conversation, attempting once again to keep up with their reasoning. Catarina and Tessa worked well together and seemed to greatly respect one another despite their different personalities and temperaments. Yet, Alec suspected that they both wished Magnus could take part. They were friends because they shared their friendship with Magnus and, thus, their connection to one another seemed to be missing a leg now that Magnus was, for all intent and purposes, absent. Alec understood how they felt; for he too felt incomplete, a stranger in this house in which he had shared such wonderful times with Magnus, a ship which sails had ripped and that now drifted without destination or purpose.

"That is way too risky Tessa! There must be another way!" Catarina suddenly raised her voice above the low and polite tenor that had until then characterized her exchanges with Tessa, each word gaining in intensity and force alerting Alec that the warlocks were at an important crossroad in their research. In the long hours they had been cloistered in this ever-colder and darker apartment, Catarina and Tessa had many times offered different perspective on an issue, but they had rarely disagreed. It was as if their commitment to help their friend superseded all differences. However, in the last few minutes they seemed to have gotten locked in a battle of wills, each pulling in different directions. Catarina showed increasing concern about the dangers of a course of action that Tessa argued was the only option with even a remote possibility of success. "What Aldous proposed could kill Magnus and whomever goes into his mind, or worse," Catarina pleadingly added.

"I know," Tessa responded, lifting her hands with her palms out in a gesture of appeasement. "But there is no other option, Catarina, and since it is risky, I should be the one to try it."

"Absolutely not," interjected Alec, more determination in his voice than in any other of the interventions he had made in the last few hours. Until then he had been listening from the sidelines, trying to keep up with the debate and the information about the risks of Aldous' experiment, but now he was sure that his time of idled waiting was coming to an end. "I will do it."

The two women turned to look at Alec, their faces betraying a mixture of panic, unease and surprise. "It is too dangerous Alec," argued Tessa and Catarina's nodding head suggested that, while the two of them might be in disagreement about the course of action, they were of one mind in their assessment of Alec's capacity to take part in the procedure.

"You would be defenseless," added Tessa, "your Nephilim abilities would be completely useless in that state, and you would be at the mercy of strong demonic forces."

"But for what I gather," Alec refuted, "so would yours. There is no guarantee that your magic powers would work once you enter Magnus' mind. Catarina, Tessa, I am the right choice, the only choice," he added looking from one warlocks to the other. "I have a close connection to Magnus. He will listen to me. Besides, Magnus needs the two of you to mix the potions and perform the necessary spells. I cannot be of any help in that regard."

"You don't understand," Catarina said, her eyes fixed on Alec who at that moment stood beside Magnus in a protective stance that had become routine since he walked into the apartment all those hours ago. "If Aldous's notes are accurate, petrification lures and then traps warlocks in their darkest memories and thoughts while the demonic infection takes hold. That is how it manages to feed on their magic and create a conduit between pandemonium and our realm. You risk getting trapped with Magnus in whatever dark place he is currently lost. If that happened, the disease would also claim you. We don't know what that kind of demonic poisoning would do to you."

"The procedure is very dangerous," added Tessa wringing her hands in a gesture that denoted more anxiety than Alec had seen since she abruptly arrived at Magnus' penthouse. "Not only to Magnus, but also to whomever goes into his mind as well as to the warlock performing the spell. The forces that have taken hold of him will resist and will try to drag you and us into the darkness. If you don't find Magnus in time and convince him to fight back, you will not be able to resist, and, at the end, we could all end up trapped in a hell like no other you could ever imagine."

"The more reason for me to do it," Alec stated, a stubborn inflection in his words. "I can bring him back and, since I am the reason he is in that state, it is only fair that I am the one to take the risk."

"You may not like what you find once you follow Magnus into the darkness," Catarina repeated in a warning tone. "We are children of the dark and the light, Alec. As such, we carry good and evil, light and dark forces within. You may not like the darkness you see in Magnus."

"There is nothing dark or evil about Magnus," Alec stated. "Or at least nothing that could ever turn me away from him. I don't care what it costs me. I will bring him back, you can be sure of that."

After a moment of silent reflection, Tessa and Catarina looked at each other, and Alec wasn't sure whether what he saw in that look was resignation or silent agreement, but one thing was certain: he had won the argument.

They next hours were spent in swift preparations. Once the decision had been made, the need to put the plan in motion became even more urgent. If what they were seeing in Magnus and reading in Aldous' notes were true indications of the course that petrification took, they had little time to bring Magnus back. Tessa spent the time researching and rechecking the spells they would use to transport Alec's mind to whatever place Magnus' mind was now lost. Meanwhile Catarina, using the ingredients that Jem magically sent them, mixed the potions that would put Alec into the state of inertia needed for the magic to work. Alec, in the meantime, was instructed to rest. This was hard to do. Alec's mind had been in a constant racing state and, no matter what he tried, he couldn't manage to quiet it long enough to regain his strength. So, instead, he sat next to Magnus whispering to him, recalling for him happy memories of their time together, telling him in countless ways how much he loved him and how much he needed him back.

"Do you remember Prague Magnus?" he asked quietly. "It was one of our first dates. We spent the evening strolling along the city, walking among other couples. I wanted to hold your hand so badly, put my arm around you, whisper in your ear how lovely your hair sparkled in the moonlight. But I was still scared, terrified really, that we would run into other Shadowhunters and my secret would be out. You understood and respected my need for secrecy, but I was a coward. I wasn't ready yet, but now I wish I had put aside all my fears and my insecurities. Now I wish I had stopped you, put my hand on your cheek and kiss you, there in front of everybody, the way I wanted to do." Alec took Magnus' hand in his in the loving gesture that had been Alec's line of connection to Magnus since he came back from Idris. "If you come back to me Magnus, I promise to never again hide my feelings for you. I will scream to the four winds that you are the rightful owner of my heart and soul."

"It is time, Alec, we are ready for you," Tessa's soft voice interrupted Alec's declaration of love.

"I swear I will bring you back Magnus, or I will die trying," Alec whispered in Magnus' ear. He then stood and gently kissed the warlock on the forehead, before turning and walking towards the couch where Catarina was waiting, a glass in her hand, a dark metallic grey liquid swirling in it.

"Drink all of it," she said handing him the glass once Alec was sitting down. "The first couple of swallows will taste vile but soon you won't notice it anymore." She gave him one of those smiles he was sure Catarina used with her small patients, a smile he could not resist returning.

"We will keep you under for only a few minutes the first time," Tessa told him, placing a hand on his upper arm in a gesture of reassurance. "Think of this apartment when you hear my voice calling you back."

Catarina had been right, the first gulps of the potion were absolutely revolting, as if he was drinking something that had been extracted from the ass of a dead demon. But soon he couldn't taste the liquid anymore, for whatever the potion contained numbed his lips and tongue, the numbing sensation spreading down his throat, and from there expanding through his veins, causing his skin to tingle and making him lightheaded. Alec handed the empty glass back, barely aware of the hand that received it, and then looked around the room. The faint lights that illuminated the apartment began to grow a halo, their shimmer bleeding into the air, blinding him at first and then dimming once again, plunging the room into more darkness. He could hear Catarina and Tessa's voices telling him something, and he thought he saw blue and red magic sparkles dancing between Tessa's fingers. But he could not hold on to his thoughts long enough to make sense of the words or grow concerned. It was if he had a hole in his skull through which all thoughts and ideas rapidly escaped.

Alec had never done drugs, very few drugs had any effects on the Nephilim, but at that moment, he thought that this was what being high must feel like. But then that thought too flew away from his mind, its escape so swift that he didn't have enough time to turn it into words.

Suddenly, the room became crowded, shadows moving in the corners, eyes peering at Alec from behind curtains and closed doors, some sad, some menacing, eyes that looked like the eyes of a hundred cats. Mouths, some moaning, some sneering, joined the eyes, their presence so startling that Alec felt his heart jump and loudly beat against his ribs. He tried to warn Tessa and Catarina of the presence of the spying eyes and the sneering mouths, but the words came out in a slur of sounds, unintelligible even to him, muddled as his thoughts. He tried to point in the directions of the shadows but, as the numbness reached every last corner of his being, he lost control of his muscles.

"I think he is hallucinating," Catarina said to Tessa, as she placed a hand behind Alec's head and gently helped him lie down on the cushions. "The potion took effect faster than anticipated." Tessa simply nodded in acknowledgement as she tried to keep her mind singularly focussed on the spell she was conjuring up.

Alec heard the words, and for an instant the words made sense, before they too became like water running through rocks, rushing along with other sounds, sounds of screams, moans and laughs that flooded his mind, making it even harder to hold on to his thoughts. Alec felt that he was suddenly in a crowded and loud room, a room too small to hold so much noise. He closed his eyes to keep the sounds out and as he did, everything went abruptly silent, as if the noise had been cut by the swift motion of a sword, leaving just an echo behind, an echo bouncing against the walls. As all noise died down, Alec became aware of the loud sound of his own rapid breathing. He cautiously opened his eyes and looked around, and suddenly found himself no longer in Magnus' apartment. Instead, he stood in front of an old and heavy wooden door, its hinges and handles made of solid black iron. Knowing that there was no turning back, to return without Magnus, he reached for the door handle and pushed hard. Once the door gave way, he took a deep breath and stepped into the shadows.

 **This still needs a bit of work…**


	8. Chapter 8 - Black as Hell

**As Black as Hell**

"Alexander! Tessa! Wait!" Magnus desperately called out as he hurriedly pursued the echo of voices and the hints of movement around yet another dark corner. Even though he couldn't make out the words, he was sure it was them he had heard: Alec's unmistakable gentle voice, and Tessa's musical and old-fashioned accent. But as he took the last turn, he run almost head first into yet another dead end. Frantically, he searched for another path but all he saw were dark green hedges, closely intertwined creating an impenetrable barrier, reaching up so high that Magnus could not see where the green ended, and the black sky began.

As Magnus pondered for the thousandth time how long he had been trapped, wandering and lost in this endless maze, he run his hands through his hair, its ends standing in all directions, proof of his increasing despair. Hard as he had tried, he had a long time ago lost his sense of time and direction and could no longer tell whether it had been a thousand days or a thousand years since he had entered this field of punishment. If someone asked, he was not even sure he could remember how or why he had been trapped here.

Magnus had just wanted to take a break, to quiet his thoughts and his unruly feelings before making a decision about what to do with his relationship with Alec. He had wanted to stop hurting and yearning for the Shadowhunter long enough to sort out his feelings and contemplate his future. He had not intended to completely let go of his grasp on reality. Perhaps he had misjudged the depth of his sorrow. For as soon as he allowed the memories to embrace him, to shelter him in what he thought was their healing cocoon, they had overtaken him, invited other memories along, other loses, other absences, other sorrows. Before he could stop them, the memories and the sorrows had dragged him into a frigid world full of shadows.

That is how his torment had begun: with the sweet temptation of soothing memories, memories that lured him into this confusing labyrinth. Once he was trapped, the memories turned bitter and dark before being swallowed by a demonic and ever-advancing fog, a fog conjured up by his father as punishment for Magnus' rebelliousness. In his effort to protect that which he most cherished, Magnus had been forced to run farther and farther into the maze, escaping from a darkness that quickly consumed the world around him, looking for a way out or a way through. As the fog advanced taking more and more, relentlessly rewriting his past, his world became smaller and his memories less certain. A few times, he had taken a wrong turn and when he had tried to retrace his steps, he had found that the fog had already devoured the place he had just left. So, he was forced to keep pushing on, unable to turn back, lost, disoriented and at the mercy of unpredictable and ever-changing twists in his path.

However, disorientation, entrapment and the futile search for an exit were not the worse of the punishments his father had prepared for him. "You have finally come back to your creator, demon's son," his father, Asmodeus Prince of Hell, had said by way of greeting, when he first appeared to Magnus, a cold expression in his black pitiless eyes, contempt in the facade that masked his true face.

"I am not here by my own desire," Magnus had replied, trying his best to conceal his surprise when he took a turn in the maze and found himself unexpectedly in a large stone room illuminated with torches. His father, dressed in the French fashion of the 1700s – black coat, lavishly decorated wine-red silk waistcoat, knee length black breeches and a black lace jabot tied around his neck – sat on a large and intricately carved wooden chair, surrounded by some of his courtesans, demons wearing eerie masks. Asmodeus' attire or his presence should not have surprised Magnus. After all, it had been the early 18th century when a young Magnus had finally liberated himself from his father's chains and had vanished him to Edom. And, his father was probably the most vindictive of Lilith's princes. Magnus had known immediately both that his father was the reason for his troubles, and that things would get considerably worse before he could even hope for them to improve.

"Is this how Magnus Bane, High Warlock of Brooklyn, greets his father to whom he owes his powers, his immortality and all his achievements?" his father had asked with a smile that was half a sneer. "After all your offenses and betrayals, after you consort and engage in carnal sin with the Nephilim, our enemy, after you vanished us to this forsaken place, can you not even manage a modicum of humility when in the presence of your father and creator?" Some of his minions standing around the room had made noises of apparent outrage.

"Let's not attempt to deceive ourselves, father," Magnus had stated, the word father passing through his lips as if he was trying to spit out an unwittingly swallowed bitter poison. The reference to his relationship to Alec sent a shiver down Magnus' spine. He should have known that from his place of banishment Asmodeus would continue to keep taps on him. "First of all, if I ever owed you anything, I paid that debt dearly a long time ago, and, secondly, there is no love lost between us. Our last encounter is sufficient proof of that. What do you want from me?"

"I can see that you remain ungrateful and unrepentant," replied Asmodeus, the smile gone, replaced by a look of profound hatred, a hatred that made his eyes turn a smoldering red that resembled lava. Magnus could clearly remember a time when those eyes had made him quiver in terror. While those eyes still unsettled him, especially in his current surroundings, they now provoked him more contempt than fear. "You will be disappointed to know that there is nothing I want from you. I already have what I want. After three centuries, I finally have you in my grasp."

"So, it is to you to whom I owe my unexpected trip to Edom," Magnus said, imbuing as much sarcasm as he could muster into his words. He was determined not to show weakness, not in front of his father. "I am always happy to take holiday, but I prefer sunny and warm places, you know, sand, beaches and, certainly, much better company," he added weaving a hand around the room.

"No, my son," replied Asmodeus, a disdainful smile lifting the corners of his mouth. "You owe your present predicament to your own self. Your weakness, your lovesickness for that deceitful Nephilim, and your inability to overcome your insufferable human tendency to grieve what you have lost is what has afforded us this rare opportunity for vengeance. They are also the key that will free us from this place. You see," he added rubbing his hands together in a gesture of anticipation, "my vengeance is also my salvation. The longer you suffer, the stronger I will become. When there is nothing left of you but a pile of dried bones and an empty mind, I will finally be free. We could not have asked for a sweeter vengeance."

Asmodeus' words caused another shiver to run down Magnus' spine, a shiver that reached the very marrow of his bones and caused the hair in the back of his neck to stand up. Magnus rarely felt terror. He got scared, like most people did, but very few things ever terrified him. Yet, his father's words were a bad omen, not just a threat, but rather the certain preamble to catastrophe. "Once again, you underestimate me, father," stated Magnus, his tone mirroring the hatred and disdain in his father's voice, his mind singularly focused on not showing his fear.

"Not this time," interjected Asmodeus, sinuously standing and taking two steps towards Magnus. "This time it is you who underestimates us. Not only are you not completely correct about your location; for you are not precisely in Edom. We also know exactly what your weakness is. We will take everything you hold most dear. One by one, we will take your most cherished memories and thoughts. We will pluck them one by one, as one plucks the wings from a butterfly, until there is nothing left of you, but an empty conduit leading us to the mundane realm, that realm you have tried so hard to protect from us. Now, run, Magnus Bane, run for your life and for the life of those whose safety and love you value so much. Run!" he repeated, his voice gaining in intensity and volume with each passing second. The courtesans standing around the room began to chant the word over and over and louder and louder.

As the word echoed in tens of voices around the room, Asmodeus gave Magnus an evil smile before lifting his arms and turning his face to the sky, his mouth agape. From it a black fog emerged, a fog that descended upon the room, obscuring his father, his minions and menacingly advancing towards Magnus. As the fog approached, Magnus saw that it was not just darkness trapped in it. Skeletal faces, their empty sockets fixedly looking at Magnus, and the horrific tentacles and leathery wings of unseen monsters floated in the black cloud. So, Magnus had no other choice but to run.

Since that first encounter, Magnus had been constantly on the move, trying to stay ahead of his father's vengeance, hoping against hope to find a way out. It had not taken long for

Magnus to grasp the meaning of his father's words. For they had not yet ceased to echo in his ears when Magnus took a turn and found himself in another room, the maze abruptly gone. He looked around momentarily disoriented, and saw that he was in a wooden, low ceiling edifice, not really a cottage, but more like a shack. A fire burned in the hearth, and a lighted candled on a rustic holder rested on a black wooden table surrounded by two chairs. The place was silent except for the call of cicadas outside the only window.

"Do you think this will do Mr. Bane?" came a deep-toned and nervous voice from behind Magnus. Startled, Magnus turned and came almost face to face with his old friend James. His black eyes, those eyes that always seemed to contain wisdom than exceeded his years reflected the light from the fire and accentuated his youthful beauty. James was adjusting a white cravat around his neck and smoothing the front of his linen shirt and black jacket. Magnus suddenly realized where he was and what night this was. He had not thought about this night in over a hundred years but now the memory was unexpectedly clear. This was the night that he had helped his friends Harriet and James escape South Carolina to the slavery-free states in the North.

James' hands trembled, and his eyes shifted from Magnus to the door, afraid, Magnus knew, that they would be caught before they even had the chance to begin their journey to freedom.

"It will do well enough," Magnus replied as he remembered doing all those decades ago. And, then, as in all those decades ago, Harriet came into the room, an equally nervous smile on her young face, her bonny and calloused hands – the result of a life of hard labour – holding up her skirts to avoid getting mud in them. Magnus stifled a sigh. He hadn't remembered just how young Harriet and James had been, not even twenty yet, but with the weight of centuries of violence and injustice on their shoulders.

"It is quiet outside," Harriet whispered, "everyone has retired for the night. We should go." Magnus remembered then that James' bravery and determination had only been equal to Harriet's. The young woman was fierce, and her mind was sharp like few others Magnus had met.

They had been planning this nights for weeks, ever since Magnus met James during a trip south and the young man spoke of his dreams of freedom. But the plan had acquired unexpected urgency in the last few hours. James had been sold this morning at the slave market in town and in the morning, he was to be shipped to a plantation hundreds of miles away. Harriet, whom James had secretly married, had been condemned to stay behind, carrying their yet unborn child. Faced with James' look of desperation and the certainty that the young man would do something unwise just to avoid his brutal fate, Magnus had agreed to help, to use his magic and risk being discovered by the warlocks that sold their services to slave owners and hunting parties. This night, he would use his powers to glamor James and Harriet, to conceal them under white faces: a father and daughter travelling with a Dutch merchant. They would make it all the way to New York and Harriet and James would live a long life, a life of hard work and sometimes hardship, a life of helping others escape similar fates, a life of freedom. Magnus would visit them often over the following decades and would see their children grow and become good men and women. Sometimes over the years, he would arrive at their home with other equally desperate people searching for escape from this brutal time in history.

At least that was how the events of this night were supposed to have happened. His father, with his unquenchable thirst for vengeance, had other plans, and the memory did not have the same ending. As soon as they got on their way, a hunting party descended on their tracks, a warlock with smoldering red eyes assisting in the hunt, and they were quickly captured. Magnus could not protect his friends. As hard as he tried to muster his magic, his powers didn't work. He felt, for the first time in his long life, completely powerless and defenseless.

That was not were his punishment ended. Asmodeus forced Magnus to witness James and Harriet being tied to the whipping post. The cracking sound of the whip as it came down on skin, the horrible screams and cries for mercy – screams and cries that soon turned into low moans and then into nothing – pierced Magnus' ears, and cut his heart to shreds. A memory that had been one of Magnus' warmest turned vicious and ugly. A child who was meant to grow up free never had the chance to be born. A couple who was destined to live in love and generosity left their lives and their dreams for freedom tied to that infernal post before the fog came and swallowed them. The last thing Magnus heard as he began to run again was his father's sarcastic and booming voice: "this is what happens when your creator takes away what he so generously bestowed on you."

That had been the first of countless blows, of countless memories recalled and destroyed, of moments of joy scratched and rewritten by his father's relentless pen. "This is not how it happened," Magnus kept repeating at first, but as time in the maze stretched without end, and as his father made him recall so many of the faces and events that had populated his long life, Magnus began to doubt his own mind. George, whom Magnus had loved with a love that had felt eternal, left for war promising to return. But instead of knocking at Magnus' door one unexpected sunny morning, all Magnus got was his inert body, his chest pierced by a bayonet. His friend Isabella, no longer held her newborn child, but instead looked at Magnus with hate in her lovely green eyes.

"You killed my baby, you demon spawn," she screamed holding the unmoving bundle against her chest.

"Isabella," Magnus pleaded, "I am sorry, I tried."

"Everything you touch dies, for you are the child of death. Leave my sight demon!"

Every time, with every savage mutilation of his memories, Magnus grew more and more helpless and hopeless, unable to change the outcome, unable to save those and that which he loved. That was his father's vengeance: to give the deceiving gifts of memories – of faces from long ego yet still remembered, of smiles long departed and yet much yearned for, of touches long faded yet still beloved – just to take them away. And as Magnus kept going father and father into the maze, trying to stay ahead of the fog, he began to fear and doubt his own capacity to recall.

Once in a while, Magnus heard Alec's voice, gentle and loving, calling him, and he thought he saw his silhouette just as it turned a corner. But every time Magnus called for Alec, every time he went after him, he received no answer and found only another twist in his path. In time, he realized this was also part of his father's punishment: to keep him hoping just to take that hope away. Asmodeus wanted him to experience what is was to get a glimpse, but never a touch of what Magnus loved the most.


	9. Chapter 9 - As Dark as Night

**As Dark as Night**

"Aaaaleeec," his name sounded like the call of a mermaid reaching towards him from the dark depths of the unknown. "Aaleec," he heard the voice again a second later, nearer this time, and his name was no longer a call in a mermaid's lips but long tentacles reaching and coiling around his ankles. He thrashed around in a panic, kicking his feet and flapping his arms, struggling to pull himself up, his lungs screaming for oxygen, his eyes blind in the greenish blackness, his mind confused. With all the strength left in him, Alec resisted the urge to open his mouth and inhale, certain that if he did, the water would finally claim him. "Alec," the voice called a third time, and his name was now a rock that pulled him down and down towards the bottom. Almost at the same time, he felt a pair of hands grabbing him by the shoulders, shaking him gently at first and then more forcefully. "Alec!" the voice called one last time and he finally lost the battle and opened his mouth in surrender, certain that his lungs would fill with water. But they didn't. Instead, he gasped like a newborn taking his very first breath, and his lungs filled with oxygen before a fit of coughing gripped him.

Startled, Alec jumped and sat up abruptly, almost hitting his head against Catarina's who was shaking him awake. He swung his feet off the sofa and coughed violently into his shaking hands, a mouthful of water rushing out from the very depth of him. He took another deep and ragged breath more thankful than he had ever been for the gift of air. He then put his face in his still shaking hands and tried to bring his rapid breathing under control and stop the shivers that run wild throughout his body. His heart beat with such speed and loudness that Alec was sure Catarina could hear it drumming in his chest.

"You are okay," Catarina reassuringly said, wrapping a blanket around his shoulders and patting him on the back. "You are back Alec."

Alec wrapped his arms around himself and was surprised when he felt that, except for a thin layer of sweat, he was dry. He looked around the room, making sure that he was, in fact, back in Magnus' apartment. His eyes stopped when they came to rest on Magnus, still sitting on the same chair by the window, his eyes still lost in the distance. Despite his condition and the shadows that surrounded him, Magnus' presence felt like a reassuring certainty, an anchor that grounded Alec to this reality. 'I must get you out of that place Magnus,' he thought. 'I cannot leave you there.'

"How long was I under?" Alec asked out loud, making every possible effort to settle his nerves and control the shaking of his hands. He didn't remember the last time he had experienced such fear or anxiety and the adrenaline running through his system made every cell in his body scream at him to fight or run.

"No more than fifteen minutes," replied Tessa from the armchair next to him, and Alec realized that it was her voice the one he had heard calling him back to the here and now. He shifted his gaze from Magnus to her and saw the exhaustion plainly written on her face. Tessa run a trembling hand along her brow drying an invisible sheen of sweat and, taking a deep and relieved breath, leaned her head back against the armchair. Alec recognized the symptoms, he had seen them in Magnus several times when he had done too much magic and his powers were depleted. Tessa had used considerable energy trying either to keep Alec under or to bring him back. Alec was not certain which and, frankly, was afraid to ask.

"Take a minute to catch your breath," Catarina instructed and walked towards the kitchen in search of drinks.

Tessa closed her eyes and with her thumb and index finger squeezed the bridge of her nose as if to stifle a headache. Alec hugged himself more tightly and run his hands up and down his arms, trying to warm himself and get hold of his emotions. He stood up and on still unsteady legs went to Magnus and took his hand in his, the certainty of the touch reassuring and comforting. He pushed the images from a minute ago out of his mind and replaced them with happier and more soothing memories: the sensation of Magnus' arms around him; of his body relaxing against his own; of Magnus stifling a laugh because of something Alec had unwittingly said or done; of Magnus looking down in contemplation, unaware of Alec's gaze on him, his black hair reflecting the sunlight in tones of red, ebony and blue.

"Magnus, I will get you out," he whispered, the oath solid and certain on his lips despite his apprehension.

"Are you okay Alec?" Tessa asked, opening her eyes to look at him.

"I am doing as well as you," he replied noncommittally, turning and giving her a hesitant smile. "Drink and food usually help Magnus replenish his powers. Do you want me to mix you a drink or make you something to eat?" he offered. Alec didn't know enough about magic or how warlocks master it, and what he knew he had learned from Magnus. As a result, he didn't know whether there was a standard remedy for power depletion. Magnus had told him once that he didn't actually make magic, but rather commanded it by calling on the forces of nature and willing them to obey him. The process used up energy and when the warlock used too much of it, his capacity to command nature's powers diminished and the body weakened. Once again, he wished he had overcome his hesitation to appear too curious and asked more questions.

"I have never been much of a drinker," Tessa replied. "I will be fine after I have some chocolate," she added and reached in her bag for a chocolate bar.

Catarina rejoined them and handed a glass to Alec and another to Tessa. Suddenly thirsty, Alec took a few healthy pulls of the clear liquid. His eyes instantly filled with tears and his throat caught fire. He had expected to taste water, but instead the bitter and strong taste of alcohol flooded his mouth. He struggled not to go into another coughing fit and forced himself to swallow, the liquid scorching his chest as it made its way down to his stomach.

"Are you okay?" Catarina asked patting him twice on the back. "Careful, it is soda and vodka."

"I am fine, I am fine," Alec replied, giving up the struggle against the cough. "A little warning would be great next time. There is hardly any soda in this drink," he added trying to catch his breath.

"I am sorry, the drink is a little stiff," Catarina said with an apologetic smile.

"Understatement of the year," Alec replied drying the tears with the back of his hand. He took another considerably more careful sip, the heat easing up and becoming warmth as it spread through his body.

"Do you want to tell us what happened, what you saw?" Catarina asked once Alec's coughing ceased and he settled back in the sofa. She took a confident pull of her own drink, which Alec suspected was even stronger than his own. For a second, he wondered whether she could drink Magnus under the table if the occasion called for it. "We can wait if you need to take a break. You are still a little pale," she offered looking at Alec with an expression and attention learned through centuries of caring for the sick.

"No, I am okay," Alec replied. He wished he didn't have to speak about his recent experience, but he understood that he had no choice. "We have to get Magnus out of that place," he added, renewed urgency in his voice.

"The more you tell us about what happened, the more we can help," Tessa prompted.

"It was dark and unnerving," Alec started, certain that the words were insufficient to capture the feel of the place from which he had just barely escaped. "And it felt very real and solid, you know, tangible. It wasn't like what I imagined being in someone's mind would be like."

"Hmm," exclaimed Catarina, and she and Tessa exchanged a worried look. "Perhaps your mind went to a place that is connected to a real place, or that has a stronger connection than we had originally suspected. But let's not get ahead of ourselves. Go on Alec."

"At first, I thought I was hallucinating," Alec continued. "The room spun, and I saw shadows and heard voices in the room. But then, suddenly, I was no longer here, but somewhere else standing in front of a door. The door led to a long and damp corridor. At least I think it was a corridor; it was very dark, and I could not really see farther than a couple of meters."

In truth, it had been hard, at first, for Alec to ascertain the dimensions of the place. It had felt like it was both too large and too small at the same time, both empty and crowded. The air was stifling and old, as if it had been trapped there for centuries. When he looked up or towards the distance, he could not see a ceiling, bend or ending to the corridor. There were no windows or doorways, but just shadows and the smell of old trapped air. When he extended his arms in search of a wall, his fingers touched nothing. Accustomed, as he was, to venturing into dangerous places, he had stepped lightly and stealthily, and had automatically reached for his bow and quiver. But he didn't have them and when his hand went for the stele he carried in his pocket, it too came out empty. He had experienced a moment of panic when he realized that he was unarmed and had wished that Jace, Magnus or Izzy were there, for he was unaccustomed to going into battle alone and without weapons.

He had been walking for a few meters, the stone ground wet and slippery under his boots, when he heard light and fast footsteps, like the steps of a small person or perhaps a child, running a few meters ahead of him. The steps were accompanied by faint giggles, definitely a child's, their echo bouncing against the invisible walls. He trained his eyes on the source of the sounds and thought he saw a small and slim silhouette disappearing into the shadows.

"Who is there?" he whispered just loud enough, hoping not to alert anyone else but the child of his presence. He was certain the silhouette turned, and for a second thought he could see the shine of a pair of eyes, but then the silhouette turned its back on Alec again, continued running off and soon disappeared.

"You have done it now angel's son," a low and booming voice pierced the silence, its sound also echoing in the room making it impossible for Alec to determine from whence it came. "If they didn't notice the righteous stench of the angel on you before, they certainly heard you now."

"Who are you?" asked Alec hoping that by keeping whomever spoke talking he could detect their location. He mentally calculated his options for fending an attack. His hand-to-hand combat skills were very good, but they would only help him if the attack come from a close distance. Without weapons he had no chance of defending himself against an attack from afar. "Can you help me?" he added, "I am looking for someone."

"I am sure you are," the voice drawled, its origin still a mystery. "Only someone desperate enough would venture here looking for someone," the voiced added and the statement was punctuated by a mocking and malevolent tone.

Alec lifted his arms in front of him, and stood his ground in a defensive posture, turning slowly from side to side attempting to assess the situation and predict from where an attack might come. Another sound, a scuffling noise, like the sound of a thousand insects stepping on rock, their wings rubbing against each other, irrupted into the silence. Alec looked up towards the place from where he thought that latest sound originated, and thought he saw movement in what he assumed was the ceiling. It was not a clearly discernible movement, but rather a disturbance in the shape and movement of the shadows, like ripples in the black surface of a still lake.

"This is the place where things come to get lost, angel's child, not found," the voice spoke again, and this time it came from just behind Alec, as if whomever had spoken was standing right behind him whispering in his ear. The words and the feeling of proximity made the hair in Alec's arms and the back of his neck stand on end and an involuntary shiver run down his back. "And now you are lost too," the drawling voice added. "A Nephilim in hell, how delicious." A low, malevolent and sarcastic laugh followed this statement.

Alec had turned swiftly, ready to confront whomever was taunting him, but just at that moment, the scuffling noise from above intensified and quickly morphed into the flapping sound of wings taking fly. Something brushed against his cheek, close enough for Alec to feel the unnerving sensation of warm leathery wings against his skin.

"I am sure it was a demon," he now told Tessa and Catarina who had been listening to his experience without interrupting, their expressions reflecting increasing concern. "And it was not alone," he added. Alec had called on all his willpower to keep the fear that was squeezing his chest from turning into full-blown panic. He had also become even more painfully aware that he was completely unarmed and alone.

"Can I ask," Catarina tentatively said, her voice measured, "is the possibility of having to face demons alone and unarmed something you are afraid of Alec?"

"Yes," Alec replied, a hint of hesitation or perhaps embarrassment in his voice. "I think it is a fear common among the Nephilim. We are demon hunters. Yet, we are also just human. We have no powers others than those bestowed on us through runes, and we depend on each other and on the weapons handed down to us by the Angel." This was only partially true, Alec thought but didn't say. Nightmares in which he was forced to confront unknown and unseen enemies without backup or weapons had been a recurrent condition of his growing up. Even now, anxiety still gripped him when he and his team went on missions with insufficient preparation or planning. While Jace run into situations head first and many times without a plan, Alec's way of dealing with his anxiety about the unknown was to be cautious, not fearful but careful. He had also assumed the role of the protector, the one always prepared and ready to defend, the one to devise attack strategies. It was in part this combination – Jace's impulsiveness and Alec's caution – that made him and his parabatai a formidable team. And, it was Alec's attention to detail and his capacity to foresee potential risks that made him a great leader. Yet, he knew that underneath those laudable skills there was the old anxiety that populated his childhood nightmares.

"Go on," Tessa prompted, her tone reassuring and gentle despite the unease plainly written on her face. She filed away Alec's answer, hoping that at the end, she and Catarina would be able to make sense of the forces that had Magnus in their grip.

"As I said, it was dark, but I could still sense movements in the shadows and I was certain that there was more than one being in the corridor with me. Suddenly, a few meters ahead and somewhere above my head, I saw a pair of red eyes shining brightly in the darkness, a pair of red eyes, disembodied at first, intensely looking at me." As Alec's eyes adjusted to the darkness, the face that framed those sinister and malevolent eyes became discernible among the shadows, an enormous horned head covered in grey leathery skin and with a mouth full of sharp black teeth. Alec had moved slowly to one side and the face turned, its movement inhuman, following him with its unnervingly intense red eyes. For a second that felt like an eternity, he and the beast looked at one another, as if each was trying to take the measure of the other. Likely deciding that Alec was not much of a threat, the shadow detached itself from its surroundings and took fly, the flapping of its winds disturbing the relative stillness of the air, creating a breeze that blew Alec's hair. As the shadow became solid, Alec could get a first impression of the size and strength of the beast. It was enormous, its body also completely covered in grey and black leathery skin, with enormous claws and sharp talons at the end of its short legs.

"I run," he stated and, looking from Tessa to Catarina, run a shaking hand through his hair. He hoped the two warlocks would understand and ultimately forgive his inability to hold his ground. Betraying all that his training had taught him, Alec had run because he understood that there was nothing he could do to defend himself. Not only was he unarmed, but it was also evident that the red-eyed demon was not alone. For as soon as it took flight in Alec's direction, the scuffling noise above Alec's head intensified signaling that other beasts were joining it. "I was half blind, so I kept my hands extended trying to avoid crashing against a wall while I swerved from side to side to avoid the demon's talons and teeth."

"Magnus!" Alec had called as he run, no longer concerned with being silent or stealthy. "Magnus!" he called again hoping that in whatever corner of this hell Magnus was, he would hear his call and come to him. Soon, Alec's lungs were burning from the exertion and his hands were scratched from the few times he stumbled and fell on the cold stone ground or almost crashed against a wall. He could still not see a way out in the darkness, no window or doorway that could offer an escape route. He had begun to think that he would lose his race against the beasts pursuing him when, suddenly, the corridor took a sharp turn to the right and there a few meters ahead, the small figure of a child, not older than four or five, was standing by the only door he had seen since he had walked into this miserable place. Except for a round face, a face that still held some of the features that characterize babyhood, the figure was almost invisible in the dark corridor.

Alec didn't have enough time to ask any question or pay attention to any more than the pair of dark brown eyes that looked at him, eyes that shone with unusual brightness in the darkness, and that seemed to speak loudly despite the child's silence. With swift movements, he grabbed the child by the hand and with the full weight of his body pushed the door, hoping it would give and let him escape. Unfortunately, the door did exactly that; it opened swiftly and without struggle, and Alec suddenly felt that there was nothing beneath his feet, nothing but air and emptiness. He experienced a brief moment of weightlessness before he went on a free fall, his stomach trying to escape through his throat, the sensation of vertigo adding to the panic. As he plummeted down towards the unknown, he could no longer feel the child's hand in his. He didn't know how deep the abyss was. But soon, he hit cold dark water and had just enough time to take a short breath before it pulled him under.

"I was drowning when you got me out," he concluded before downing the remaining of his drink, the alcohol making his head swirl a little.

"That explains your reactions when you came to," said Catarina, "as well as your refusal to breath during the last three minutes you were unconscious. I will take a wild guess and say that you also have a fear of drowning."

"Would I have drowned if you hadn't gotten me out?" Alec apprehensively asked, the question indirectly confirming Catarina's conjecture. "Can Magnus die in this realm as a result of whatever he is going through there?" He looked towards Magnus and silently repeated the oath he had been making since Catarina first summoned him back from Idris: to put his very life on the line to save the man he loved.

"We cannot say for sure," replied Tessa, but Alec thought that her eyes betrayed more than she was willing to say. "We have to do some further research."

"I need you to send me back there right now," Alec stated, determination in his voice despite the exhaustion that made his body feel heavy and slow.

"We will send you back, but first I need at least two hours to regain my strength and for Catarina to prepare a new potion," Tessa replied. "It took a considerable amount of power for me to first keep you under and then bring you back. Also, we have slept very little in the last two days. You need some sleep and so do I and Catarina. Magnus will hold on for another two hours."

"Okay," Alec reluctantly replied and did his best to keep his impatience out of his voice. "Two hours."

"What is this last strawberry worth to you?" Alec asked with a seductive smile, holding the chocolate covered fruit between his thumb and his index finger and bringing it closer to his own lips in a taunting gesture.

"Humm, let me think," replied Magnus, a playful and coy smile lifting the corner of his lips and illuminating his unglamored eyes. "It is the first day of winter. I could portal us to Iceland to look at the northern lights. That and a kiss?"

Alec shifted his eyes from Magnus' face to his bare chest, his golden skin brilliant in the morning sun, a thin sheen of sweat adding to its golden beauty and reminding Alec of the delicious exertion of their lovemaking a few minutes ago. His eyes continued down over the crisp white sheets that covered Magnus' naked body, and the memory of that body moving against his own reawoke the butterflies in the pit of his stomach. "I have a better idea," he replied and put the fruit between his teeth and came closer to Magnus, tempting the warlock to bite.

Reading his suggestion, Magnus did as Alec proposed and when their lips finally joined, the fresh and decadent flavour of fruit and chocolate invaded both their mouths increasing the pleasure and sensuality of the kiss. Alec pulled back a minute later and seeing the craving in Magnus' eyes, bit his lower lip, the gesture one of desire and yearning.

"Don't do that," Magnus whispered.

"What?" Alec asked, imbuing false innocence into his voice.

"You know what," Magnus replied. "You know I cannot account for my actions when you bite your lower lip like that."

"You mean like this?" Alec asked and repeated the gesture.

"Yes, just like that," Magnus replied and kissed Alec again, even more hungrily, his tongue exploring, tasking, taking and giving. Alec leaned back on the pillow and Magnus leaned against him, almost the whole weight of his body on Alec's. "How do you manage it Shadowhunter?" he asked a while later, his breathing shallow, his eyes on fire, his whole body calling for Alec.

"Manage what?" Alec whispered in Magnus' ear after planting kisses up and down his long and slender neck, stopping for a moment to kiss his Adam's apple.

"To make me want you with ever increasing intensity no matter how many times we make love," Magnus replied and this time it was him the one to bite his own lower lip, the gesture having the same effect on Alec as his did on Magnus. "I don't remember the last time I went so long without sleep, and no matter how tire I feel, I still want more of you."

"I know the feeling," Alec replied, and he pulled Magnus to him, inviting him to make love once again.

Magnus chuckled softly and gently. "You are going to be the death of me, Alexander" he said, "You have stamina runes; I, on the other hand, will keel over from exhaustion."

"You are all-powerful, warlock. I am sure you can manage," Alec retorted and placing his hands on both sides of Magnus' face pulled him to him, knowing full well that any resistance on Magnus' part was futile.

Alec opened his eyes and disoriented looked around the dark room, the dream still vivid in his mind and wracking havoc with his emotions and self-control. He turned on the bed and faced the side that Magnus always occupied, his spirit sinking when he saw that it was empty and cold. He picked up Magnus' pillow, brought it to his nose and inhaled deeply, the faint scent of Magnus – fresh mountain air and something else – taking him for a split-second back to the dream.

It wasn't really a dream, but rather a memory; a memory of a morning a few weeks after they had started dating; a morning spent in each other's arms, still learning the geography of each other bodies; a morning that had been the continuation of a night of making love without restrain. When hunger had become impossible to ignore, Alec had gotten up and gone to the kitchen. He had come back with cups of coffee, toast and a plate of strawberries. Using a quick spell, Magnus had magically covered the fruits in dark velvety chocolate and they had fed them to each other, each bite sensual and full of promise.

It had been like that during those first few weeks: the two of them making love as if the world was coming to an end, as if they were drinking water after weeks of wondering the dessert, as if they could not get enough of each other. It had been weeks before either of them got more than a couple of hours of sleep and when they finally slept a full night, they had done so entangled together, their bodies fused, golden and moon white skins fading into one another, making it almost impossible to see where one ended and the other began.

Thinking of those memories now, Alec missed Magnus with even more intensity than he had when he was in Idris. Despite Magnus being just in the next room, his absence hurt anew, as if it was a fresh cut. Feeling Magnus so close and yet so far; to hear his breathing but know him to be lost in some distant place was punishment like no other.

Unable to stand the weight of the memories and the absence, Alec got up and headed for the bathroom to brush his teeth and wash his face. When he looked at his watch, he saw that he had slept for three hours, one more than he had intended. He had a mission to complete, and there was no time for thinking about the past. He could only hope for a chance of reviving it once he got Magnus out of that horrific place.

He quickly glanced at his reflection in the mirror and couldn't help noticing the bags under his eyes. He reached for his stele and activated the last of his stamina runes and couldn't help smiling as he remembered the memory that had awoken him. "I swear Magnus," he whispered as he walked out of the room, "If you want me to, I will bear a thousand stamina runes, so I can spend centuries making love to you."

He walked back into the living room and the first thing he did was check on Magnus making sure his condition was no worse. After kissing him gently on the forehead, he went in search of his friends. Catarina was nowhere to be seen and Alec suspected she was either still resting or working on the potion. He found Tessa out in the balcony, looking at the illuminated New York skyline. The lights shone eerily behind the heavy glamor and wards that protected the apartment and kept them out of the reach of the warlocks from the Spiral Labyrinth, as if the city was visible through a thick layer of glass.

"You are awake," Tessa stated when she heard him approach.

"Yes, I thought you were going to wake me after two hours," he replied.

"You needed your rest," she said by way of explanation.

"Have you recovered?" Alec asked and the dark shadows under Tessa's eyes didn't go unnoticed to him.

"As much as can be hoped for under the circumstances," Tessa replied with a faint smile. "I will manage."

Alec thought that Tessa was the kind of person who never lied, no matter how hard a truth was. She could have said that she was fine, but instead, she chose to tell the truth and Alec respected her for that. "Are you ready for another attempt?" he asked.

"Are you?" she replied.

"I have to be ready," Alec stated with determination. "I must rescue Magnus or die in the attempt."

"You truly love him, don't you?" Tessa asked and turning to Alec brought the full weight of her eyes on him. Alec was certain that in the same way she spoke truthfully, she expected nothing less from those around her.

"The moment I met Magnus, my life changed forever," Alec said, and he looked at Tessa with unwavering certainty. "Just a look, Tessa, just a look of those eyes, even if they were glamored, and I was in love. That was all it took for me to know that, after years of stumbling around in the darkness; of uselessly searching for myself; of insecurity, shame and self-doubt, I had finally found what I was looking for: someone with whom to feel at home, someone who saw the truth in me. Magnus didn't only teach me to love, he gave me a gift I can never repay: he gave me myself. After that first encounter, there was no way back, no matter how much I tried to deny it. I knew deep down that I would love Magnus for the rest of my life, even if he didn't love me in the same way."

"Don't give up on that love," she said, her expression wistful. Alec's words echoed other similar sentiments, sentiments expressed long ago in voices of loved ones long gone but whose absence still felt like a black hole in Tessa's heart. The kind of love that Alec so unselfconsciously declared was rare and should be lived to the fullest. "And trust me," she added, "you are as good for Magnus as he is for you. You deserve being happy together."

"Despite what I did?" Alec asked.

"Alec, we all make mistakes," she stated, her voice full of conviction and wisdom. "Some of us have lived hundreds of years and we still make mistakes. Your mistake and Magnus' mistake are not big enough to warrant continuing dwelling on them. Mortal life is too short to waste in regrets. Take my word for it. Besides, while I wish it wasn't your burden alone to bear, I am certain that you are the key to getting Magnus out of this impasse."

"The potion is ready," Catarina interrupted from the door.

"Great," Tessa said and smiled at Catarina. "Ready?" she then asked turning to Alec.

"Yes," was Alec's short and definite reply.

 **This could still use some more work. Sorry if it is too long.**


	10. Chapter 10: Into Fire and Into Ice

**Into Fire and Into Ice**

Alec's return to the realm in which Magnus was trapped was considerably easier and less unsettling than his first journey. It was perhaps the fact that he was better prepared and knew what to expect, or perhaps it was that this time he did not fight the hallucinations and confusion that were the preamble to his departure.

"Perhaps the demonic disease can not only feed on Magnus' worse fears, but also on yours," Catarina speculated as they prepared for Alec to go under a second time. "There is no other explanation for what happened to you before. It is likely that the demonic disease will detect your presence again and try to feed on those fears."

"That might explain why Aldous got so scared that he stopped his experiments with petrified warlocks," Tessa added as she consulted the ancient warlock's spell book for what seemed like the hundredth time.

"If that is the case, what can I do?" Alec asked looking from one warlock to the other, apprehension tightening his features. Alec was a strong warrior, brave and selfless, but he was not fearless. Or at least, he didn't think he was. Just until a few weeks ago, he had been terrified of his loved ones' rejection of if they ever found out his true identity and his feeling for Magnus. In fact, most of his life, he had hidden his true self behind a reserve, hard, and sometimes acerbic exterior for fear that those around him would guess his secret. Even now, the prospect of losing Magnus was enough to send him into a state of near panic. What was worse, he suspected that, deep within him, he carried fears of which he was not even aware.

"You must do whatever it is in your power to get a hold of yourself and stay calm" Catarina replied. "Do not panic or let your fears show. You may find yourself unarmed once again, but you are not defenseless Alec," she added, resting her hands on Alec's shoulders and giving him one of her intense stares. "You have your wits and your Shadowhunter training to rely on. Remember that Magnus needs you."

"Okay," Alec said with an uncertain sigh, but then he turned to look at Magnus and his face acquired a look of determination. "I will find him and bring him back Catarina," he added right before downing in one gulp the potion that Catarina placed in his hand.

"Remember," Tessa warned as she snapped her fingers to command her magic powers, blue, purple and red sparkles coming to life at the sound, "when you hear my voice think of this room and do not linger. You should not stay longer than necessary, or I may not be able to bring you back."

Alec simply nodded, the gesture noncommittal, for he was determined that this time there would be no coming back without Magnus. He would go to the very depth of that hell in which Magnus was trapped and snatch him from the very grip of whatever demonic power had him. He would fight Lucifer himself if necessary to free Magnus. As the potion began to take effect and the room began to fade, Alec looked once again towards the still figure of his lover, wanting to carry that lovely face engraved in his memory as he set off on his journey.

Suddenly, like before, all sounds around him dissolved into dead silence and when Alec looked up, he was back in that sinister place, the same dark wooden door daring him to either proceed or turn back. Knowing that there was no other option for him than to push on, Alec took hold of the doorknob and pushed with determine strength. This time, while the corridor was as dark, cold and eerie as before, it was not empty. The same child that had stood by the exit door before was waiting for Alec a few meters into the corridor, and now he did not run off. Instead, he looked at Alec straight in the eyes and placed a finger in front of his own lips urging Alec to be quiet. Alec thought that the face of the child, open and rounded, with his big brown and serious eyes and still babyish features, looked almost serene despite the uncanniness of their surroundings. Perhaps he had been waiting for Alec and did not fear him, or perhaps it was the setting that no longer had the power to fright him.

The boy made a small gesture for Alec to follow and set off down the dark corridor, his bare feet making almost no noise as he walked. Alec followed close behind, using all his Shadowhunter training to remain alert and stealthy. About a hundred meters down, the boy stopped, turned to Alec and pointed up with a slender finger, signaling that they were about to enter the section of the corridor where he had previously encountered the demons. Alec trained his ears and eyes on the invisible ceiling, trying to detect any movement or noise and soon heard the faint sound of breathing and of bodies brushing against one another in the darkness. The demons were likely asleep, or they were still oblivious to Alec's presence. Alec and the boy proceeded even more cautiously then, Alec painfully aware that any sudden movement or sound would reawaken the demons. The next three hundred meters felt like three thousand, and by the time the corridor made a turn to the left and they reached a dark doorway that Alec had not noticed before, he was covered in sweat and every muscle in his body ached from the accumulated tension.

Without hesitation, the boy pushed the door open and entered, and Alec followed him, glad to leave that dark endless passageway. They emerged into a room full of light, the sudden change momentarily blinding Alec. As his eyes adjusted, he saw that they were in an open and airy sitting room surrounded by windows covered in white gauzy curtains that billowed in the gentle freeze. The windows looked out onto a green tropical scenery, the daylight acquiring a yellow-green tone as it filtered through the trees making it impossible for Alec to determine what time of day it was. Still silent, the boy walked towards a corner of the room where a young slender woman with long straight black hair and golden skin – her features and posture surprisingly familiar to Alec – sat in a rattan armchair lovingly rocking a small bundle wrapped in white linen in her arms. She softly sang a lullaby which words Alec could not make out.

Alec thought the woman was beautiful, her beauty accentuated by the love and devotion clearly visible on her face. He was tempted to call to her, but the silent movement of the boy and the way he looked at her told him that this was a scene he was expected to witness without interference. He also suspected that the woman was unaware of their presence and perhaps could not see them. So, he simply stood still, watching as the boy looked upon the mother with her baby, his face full of a mixture of sadness, love and wonder. In the light of the room, Alec had a chance to better see the boy, and he realized that he wasn't as young as he had originally thought. Rather, he was skinny and small for his age, as if he was malnourished rather than young. The bones in his wrists and shoulder blades stood out, and his tattered clothes and bare feet suggested that he was uncared for, alone and abandoned. Yet, he had not lost the capacity for tenderness which now Alec could see clearly in the way the boy looked at the mother and her baby.

Unexpectedly, the woman screamed, and when Alec gazed back at her, she was looking at the baby in her arms with a startled expression of bewilderment and horror. With a hasty movement, and as if the baby in her arms had suddenly been transformed into something alien and terrifying, she stood up and unceremoniously dropped him in the bassinette nearby. She then run out of the room, calling to someone in a language that Alec could not understand, but which he suspected contained words of horror and shock.

The boy slowly walked towards the bassinette and peered inside and then he looked from the baby to Alec, his face no longer serene or wondrous but full sadness. Alec imitated the boy's movements and too came to peer inside the cradle, but even before he looked upon the face of the small baby there, he knew what he would see: the beautiful golden and green eyes of a cat, their slit pupils looking up at Alec with a look of recognition.

"Who is this?" Alec asked, speaking for the first time since his consciousness left Magnus' apartment. "Where are we and why are you showing me this?" he added, the questions stumbling into one another. But the boy didn't answer, he simply gazed at the baby one last time and then turned and walked out the same door thought which the woman had just left. After a second of hesitation and a final glance towards the baby, Alec followed, and soon they were in another corridor, not as dark or as long as the first.

After a few meters, the boy guided him through another set of doors and there, in a wooden panelled room, they came upon a tall man, his short blond hair, his white skin, and his crisp white shirt contrasting with the darkness of the room. He spoke harshly, his face full of rage, to an older version of the baby they had just left. This time, the child was no much older than a toddler and he sat at a heavy wooden desk, his short legs dangling towards the floor, an enormous bible in front of him. The book was so big and the child so small that his face barely reached the pages. The man pointed to a page in the book with one finger, while in the other hand, he menacingly held a bamboo stick.

"Read boy!" the man commanded. "For the sake of your soul, read!" and the boy, his face full of shame and fear, tried to sound the words. But the words got entangled in a tongue that was still too young and too small. The man lifted the bamboo stick and brought it down on the boy's back, the stick making a whooshing sound as it made its way through the air.

Alec felt a sudden surge of rage. He had never been able to tolerate cruelty or violence specially towards children and before he could stop himself, he had lunged towards the man, reaching for the stick before it came down a second time. Yet, at the moment he thought he would grab the man by the lapel of his linen jacket, his fingers passed right through and all he touched was air. Bewildered, he looked at the older boy, his face full of questions, and what he saw was a look of resignation before the boy silently turned and walked out.

"Wait!" Alec called and when the boy did not turn or answer, he followed him out onto the corridor once again. "Whose house is this? What are you trying to tell me? Where are you taking me?" he asked, the questions rushing out yet finding no answer. For the boy seemed stout in his silence. Or perhaps, Alec thought, he could not speak. Eventually, he stopped asking and resigned himself to the company of his serious and silent companion, as the boy took him from one room to another, each one a tableau of new cruelties, rejections and abuses. As they went from room to room, Alec saw the same toddler, perhaps a little older, dressed all in black, cradling a blood-stained lace shawl in his arms; the same child, his clothes soaking wet gathering a few belongings in a canvas bag before walking out into the night; the same boy begging for food and sleeping on the cold stones of a lonely alleyway.

When Alec thought he could not take anymore and had begun to think that he was destined to wonder through an interminable succession of miseries, forced to witness but unable to do anything to help the child, they came upon the last door.

This time, the boy did not walk through first as he had done until then. Instead, he hid, scared and uncertain, behind Alec as Alec pushed the door and stepped through. As soon as they were in, Alec knew they had arrived at the end of the path and that this room, so different from the others, with its stone walls and its iron chandelier hanging from a high and dark ceiling, contained new and yet unimaginable horrors.

As soon as they were inside, the child run off and disappeared behind a column and when Alec looked back, he could not see him anymore. 'It is just me then,' he thought and, after taking a deep breath to settle his own nerves, Alec took another tentative step into the room.

Almost immediately, Alec knew that the room was far from empty. Dark figures lurked in the shadows just beyond the reach of the candlelight. Their stares made the hair in the back of Alec's neck stand on end, and a sudden fear squeezed the pit of his stomach. Remembering Catarina's words, he willed himself to not show just how scared he was. As he cautiously made his way towards the center of the room, Alec looked from side to side and got a glimpse of bodies dressed in the fashions of times gone by: full skirts, corsets, long coats, white wigs.

Suddenly, music came to life, as if someone had switched-on a turntable that had already been playing a record when it was switched-off. The music resonated throughout the room, dissonant at first but becoming more harmonious as the turntable gained speed. Cautiously at first, the figures began to step into the light moving to the rhythm, coalescing with one another, as if an invisible force was pulling them together until they became a single mass of bodies moving closer and closer to Alec. As the music intensified, they began to collide, to touch one another with increasing suggestiveness; kissing mouths and necks; running fingers and hands down faces, backs and chests; pulling dresses off shoulders and unbuttoning shirts; lifting skirts to runs hands up thighs.

As Alec walked by them, trying to get to the other side of the room where he hoped to find an exit, the figures looked at him and mockingly sneered, showing decaying teeth and black tongues, their eyes full of desire and hunger. As they got closer, Alec began to push by them, trying to stay away from their bony hands and the disgusting touch of their bodies. But it was to no avail and soon hands and arms were on him, pulling at his shirt, reaching for the belt loops of his pants, running hands through his hair. When he squirmed away, they laughed, terrifying and evil laughs. The volume and intensity of music increased even more until it became almost deafening. As it did, the faces turned even more menacing and voracious and the hands no longer caressed him, but violently clawed at him, trying to tear his shirt and skin to shreds.

As the mob intensified their assault, drops began to fall from the ceiling, crimson, fat and heavy drops that landed and tainted their ashen faces red. Alec looked up and saw with horror that blood was dripping down from the chandeliers as if they were no longer made of iron, but of bleeding veins. Some of demons turned their faces up and opened their mouths to catch the drops with their wild tongues, laughing terrifying laughs as blood touched their cheeks and entered their mouths.

When Alec thought he was for sure lost and that he would die at the hands of that demonic mob, a roar resonated throughout the room. The music immediately ceased, and the demons turned their expectant and fascinated faces towards a spot in the dark rafters of the room.

"Oh, you did it now boy" said a stocky demon in a long red silk jacket and a white powered wig, his skin and eyes a sickly yellow that resembled jaundice. "You woke him up with your raucous," he added and excitedly rubbed his hands together, as if he was about to witness a much-anticipated spectacle. His words were followed by the sound of leathery wings flapping in the air and when Alec looked up, he saw a dark silhouette detached itself from the darkness and take flight, growing exponentially as it approached. The monster flew once around the room and then, with the sound of claws and talons on the stone floor, landed in the space the demons had made for it, a few meters from where Alec stood still surrounded. Once on the ground, the monster folded its wings and transformed into a cloaked figure, its face hidden under a thick black hood. Its only distinguishable feature was a pair of red eyes, as red as rubies, catching the light from the candles and shinning with unusual brightness.

"All hope abandon, ye who enter here!" the stocky demon announced in a booming and formal voice as he tapped a heavy wooden cane twice against the stone floor. Every one of the demons turned where they stood and, straightening their clothes and smoothing their hair, faced the new arrival.

"A child of the Angel dares entering our realm?" the cloaked figure said, the statement acquiring the tone of a question. The deep and drawling voice echoed in the enormous room, commanding the mob surrounding Alec to immediate silence. "You must have a very powerful motive, Nephilim, to come into our domain. Explain the reason for this unforgivable impertinence."

The statement was followed by the mocking sniggers and snarls of the mob. A few clawed hands reached for Alec in a threatening gesture forcing him to move away and take a defensive posture, prepared to fend a new attack. The hooded figure turned his head from side to side to look at the demons and, feeling the full weight to that incandescent stare, the demons parted, retreating back into the shadows leaving Alec standing alone facing the monster.

"Our Prince demands an explanation, Nephilim," the yellow-skin demon, who now stood to one side of the hooded figure, said, almost spitting out the last word as if it was poison or an insult.

Determined not to show fear, Alec willed his heart to quiet its fast beating and his breathing to settle. He looked straight ahead at the still hidden face, making every effort not to be intimidated by the glare of those red eyes. For a moment, he thought those eyes expressed surprise or perhaps astonishment, likely at the audacity of having a human refuse to show terror. "You know why I am here," Alec stated, the defiance in his expression also coloring his words. "If you release Magnus Bane, we will leave without making any trouble."

"Magnus Bane?" the drawling voice asked with a feigned tone of confusion. "What makes you think we know who that is or that we have him?"

Alec took the posture of a soldier at ease, his hands interlaced behind his back, his body and head straight. He was determined not to betray the torrent of emotions and anxieties that threatened to overcome him at any moment. 'Do not show fear,' he silently repeated as he had done countless times since he had come back to this place. Another voice began to also echo in his mind, the faint call of a mermaid calling his name from a long distance. Tessa was beckoning him, telling him that it was time to come back to the human realm. He pushed the voice out of his mind, determined not to heed its call, not to think of Magnus' living room where Tessa and Catarina were waiting for him. 'There is no going back without Magnus,' he repeated in his mind, the words a renewed oath.

"You know perfectly well the one of whom I speak," Alec replied with a steady and assured tone, his eyes on the hooded monster unyielding and cold.

"Do not presume, Angel's son, to tell us what we know," the demon stated. The scornful words prompted a wave of gasps and whispers from the figures standing in the shadows.

"Let's not play games, demon," Alec replied. "Tell me what you want in return for his freedom."

A low and deep chuckle came from underneath the hood and the red eyes suddenly shone with even more malice. The demon lifted a pair of cadaverous and bony hands towards the hood and, with a slow and deliberate motion, pushed it back revealing a skeletal face with hollow cheeks and thin blue lips. The demon's skin had the appearance of death, ashy and grey, the only color came from those terrifying red eyes. "Hum," he said pensively, "perhaps we should entertain your inquiry if only for our amusement. We wish to hear a description of the one you seek. Perhaps we might discern whether we know, have seen, or at the very least heard of the creature capable of making a Shadowhunter comes into the depths of hell."

Alec took a deep and annoyed breath and for a split second looked down, trying to bring his emotions under control. He understood that he was not in his element and, what was worse, he was unarmed and alone. If he had the faintest hope of leaving this place with Magnus, he had no other choice but to go along with the demon's game. Once again, Tessa's faint call threatened to distract him and, once again, he put all his concentration in the task of remaining where he was. "He is the High Warlock of New York," he began, "his eyes resemble the eyes of a cat, and…"

"Desist," interrupted the demon with a dismissive gesture of his hand, the drawl momentarily gone from his voice. "We have heard no more than three words and we are already bored. We wish to be entertained. We have not heard poetry since that human was here, what was his name again?" the demon asked turning to his yellow-skinned assistant who still stood a few steps to his side.

"Shakespeare, my lord," replied the other demon, his voice full of deference. Another wave of whispers, this time of recognition and perhaps anticipation, run through the crowd.

"Yes, that is the one," the demon drawled. "How did that sentimental poem go?"

The yellow-skinned demon cleared his throat and began to recite:

" _Take him and cut him out in little stars,_ _  
_ _and he will make the face of heaven so fine_ _  
_ _That all the world will be in love with night..."_

"Yes, yes, I remember now," the demon assented, an ugly and malicious smile curving his lips. "We wish," he said turning to Alec, "for a true representation of this Magnus Bane's character. What does he mean to you?" he asked waving a hand in Alec's direction in a commanding gesture. "But beware that we crave poetry and prose in this dark forsaken place, and we wish you to entertain us with a description of your beloved."

Alec sighed loudly and closed his eyes for a moment, trying to gather his thoughts and device a strategy that could hopefully get him out of this mess. With every fiber of his being, he felt the danger in the air and knew that he was at a considerable disadvantage. His only way out was one he was not willing to take. He would not return to his realm without Magnus. At that moment, he decided that there was no other option but to play along, that he had too much to lose, that too much was at stake, to refuse the demon's demand. So, he opened his eyes and steadily looked at the red-eyed demon, hoping his face would not betray his increasing desperation.

"I am not a poet," Alec began, his voice steady, his posture unmoving, "and I am certainly not skillful at providing entertainment. But I can tell you that no matter where Magnus stands, he is always the light of the room and I his shadow. It is not just the makeup, the cat eyes, the glamour, or the High Warlock persona he wears like a second skin. It is not just the snazzy remarks or the flirtatiousness, and it is certainly not just the magic. Do not get me wrong, all those things make Magnus beautiful and special. It is just that Magnus shines like a star in a dark sky, with fire and warmth that come from within, from the depths of his soul. Magnus shines so bright that he can illuminate all my days and all my nights. Since the very first time he looked in my direction, I was hopelessly caught in his magnetic pull. Without him, my world is in darkness."

"Before I met Magnus," he continued, suddenly oblivious to the demons in the room and to the mocking eyes of their leader, "I was impervious to any emotions that were not anger or self-doubt. I was a ship at the mercy of a raging storm, without port or anchor. Magnus came into my life like a calm and fair breeze, a freeze that swelled my sails and gently and without rush pushed me forward. Without him, I am lost at sea, at the mercy of fickle winds, without origin or destination. That is why," he finally added, his gaze fixed on those red eyes, determined not to waver or show weakness, "I will give you anything, make any bargain, in exchange for Magnus' freedom. Name your price, demon, I will pay it for I am nothing without Magnus."

"Such strong and forbidden feelings for a Nephilim to harbour, especially towards the son of a demon," the demon said, a tone of awe in his voice that Alec wondered whether it was genuine. "What would your people say if they heard you speak of such forbidden, degenerate and abominable passions? What would they say if they knew your sin? Would they vanish and dishonour you?"

"It doesn't matter to me what they do or think."

"Hum, and will you truly make any bargain in exchange for the warlock's freedom? Would you offer your own freedom in return?"

"Yes," Alec replied without a vestige of hesitation, "as I said, name your price." He still hoped to get himself and Magnus out of this place, and, he was afraid, terrified really, of the prospect of being trapped forever in this infernal place. But when he examined his options, he realized that he would not think about it twice. He had told the demon that his life without Magnus would be dark and that he would give anything, pay any price for Magnus' freedom. Now he understood that that freedom meant more to him than his own happiness and that he would gladly stay in a world full darkness if he knew Magnus was free.

"What do you say to that Magnus?" the demon asked in a louder voice as he raised his face towards a spot in the dark ceiling above Alec's head. Someone somewhere released what sounded like chains and as Alec followed the demon's gaze, he saw that an iron cage was being lowered to the ground, its shape and contours becoming more discernible as it came within the reach of the candle lights. With a clank, the cage landed a few meters to Alec's right, just out of his reach. Imprisoned in that cage was the man that Alec had so fiercely searched for since he entered this demonic realm.

Even though his expression remained impassive and he stood with his back straight, Alec's first impression was that Magnus was tired, or rather worn out, as if he had been battling some unknown enemy for days or had used too much of his powers without having a chance to replenish them. Yet, to Alec, Magnus looked as handsome and fearless as ever and his heart threatened to stop the moment that Magnus looked at him. Suddenly the room seemed less threatening and sinister as Alec's heart swelled like a balloon full of hope and love.

"Do not say anything more Alexander," Magnus said, his tone a warning, and his eyes fixed on Alec, their golden incandescence burning with unusual intensity.

"Magnus!" Alec exclaimed and attempted to take a step in the direction of the cage, desperate to reach and touch his lover; desperate to make sure that those were truly his eyes looking at him and his hands gripping the iron bars. But when he tried to lift his feet, he found that an invisible force had him trapped in place. It was as if invisible tendrils had suddenly coiled up his legs pinning him to the ground. "Let me go!" he demanded turning towards the demon, his eyes fierce and pleading.

"What do you think about the Shadowhunter's offer, son?" the demon asked turning to look at Magnus, ignoring Alec's protest.

'Son?' Alec thought, the word halting his attempts to free himself from his invisible bonds. He looked from the demon to Magnus, his eyes full of questions, questions that Magnus quieted with a slight shake of his head. Magnus' eyes were un-glamoured and Alec thought he saw in them a mixture of fear and relief, as if Magnus was uncertain whether to be happy to see Alec or anxious about the circumstances of their reunion.

"You already have what you want, father. I am here," Magnus replied looking away from Alec and facing the demon, whom Alec now knew was Asmodeus. "There is no need for the Shadowhunter."

If he had not known each one of his gestures, Alec would not have noticed the way in which Magnus trained his face to remain impassive and not betray any feelings, not even the anxiety Alec had seen in his eyes a moment ago. Following Magnus' example, Alec made a similar effort to push the relief he felt to have finally found Magnus deep down within him along with the urge he felt to run to Magnus, stand between him and Asmodeus, and protect him against all the dangers that surrounded them. Still, his heart beat at a thousand beats for minute, threatening to jump out of his chest, as a result of the mixture of surprise, relief and uncertainty he felt. Alec began to assess the situation, surreptitiously looking for an exit route, desperate to get Magnus out of this horrid place.

"But the offer is so tempting," Asmodeus stated, the drawl in his voice so pronounced that Alec thought that if cats could speak, they would speak in that same manner. "Understand Magnus that in the time you have been with us, you have provided us with an immense source of enjoyment and strength. We could not have asked for a better punishment for your rebellion and betrayal. But the Nephilim can offer us so much more. He has already said that he would make any bargain in exchange for your freedom. Would he offer his own life? we wonder. Imagine what it would be like to have a Shadowhunter to entertain us." The last sentence was followed by the excited whispers of the demons in Asmodeus' court.

The words sent another wave of shivers down Alec's spine, and the hairs all over his body stood on end. For with each word, Asmodeus was stifling all hope to leave this place with Magnus. This was a 'one or the other, but not both" kind of situation and Alec understood that no matter the outcome, at the end he would be alone.

"That is not necessary," Magnus interjected. "I already told you that I would stay. Besides, you do not want to antagonize the Nephilim."

"It is okay Magnus," Alec stated, "I can stay."

"Silence!" Asmodeus stated abruptly and the word provoked gasps of surprise and fear among the demons in the room. "Do not speak as if you have a choice. We will do what we want. And what we want will give us immeasurable pleasure, for it will strengthen us, give us the chance to have one of the Angel's chosen, while we ensure that you, rebellious and treasonous son, receive the worst of punishments. This is a perfect win-win situation. Imagine the torture of knowing that the man you love is forever lost and at the mercy of my unmerciful hospitality. What a delicious vengeance." Asmodeus' eyes danced with amusement and he rubbed his hands together as if the anticipation was too much to bear.

"Father, I will do whatever you ask of me," Magnus spoke, his face no longer impassive, but full for anguish. "I will stay with you for all eternity if you just let Alec go."

"You see, my vengeance is already bearing fruits," Asmodeus said with an evil chuckle. "Your love and concern for humanity has always been the worst of your weaknesses, son, and now I send you back to the mundane realm to live with the effects of that weakness for all eternity."

"Father please," Magnus pleaded, and he now extended his arms through the iron bars, reaching towards Alec.

"It is okay Magnus," Alec said imbuing a tone of reassurance into his voice and pushing down the terror that threatened to make his knees buckle. "It is okay. I will be fine. You will be fine."

"Alexander," Magnus called to him.

"What do you say?" Asmodeus asked speaking now to the demons in his court. "Should we allow the star-crossed lovers to say a final goodbye?" The question was met with another surge of excitement and whispers that run through the crowd. "Well then, let it be known that we are magnanimous," Asmodeus said in answer to his own questions. He then snapped his fingers and the top of the cage vegan to slowly lift to let Magnus out.

"Or perhaps not," Asmodeus added offhandedly, as if at the last moment, he had changed his mind. He quickly snapped his fingers again and this time the stone floor under Alec's feet began to shift, opening to reveal a trap leading to a dark bottomless abyss.

"It is okay Magnus," Alec repeated as he looked from the shifting ground to Magnus and smiled attempting to reassure him that he would be, in fact, okay. As he lost his footing and began to fall, Alec reached for Magnus hoping for the touch of his hand one last time. He saw Magnus running towards him, his hands extended, his fingers snapping as Magnus attempted to call on his magic to stop him for plummeting down towards the dark unknown. But it was too late, and the last thing Alec saw before the darkness swallowed him was the desperate expression of the man he loved like he never thought possible to love anyone, reaching down towards him, the faint sparkle of red magic flickering and then going out between his fingers.

"Alexander!" Magnus called, oblivious to the demonic laughs that echoed through the room. He fell on the ground and extended his arms trying to command the magic that had refused to obey him since he first set foot on this place. "Alexander," he called again, his voice full of desperation, as he saw the face of his lover disappear in the darkness of the trap.

"Alexander!" and now the name sounded heavy in his lips, as if it had become a rock stuck in his throat. He called for Alec again, and this time his voice sounded as if it had an echo that resonated in two places at once, as if the name was being torn between two worlds.

He no longer heard the laughs or the raucous of the demons in Asmodeus' court; the sound was replaced by a faint but insistent tapping, like rocks thrown on a roof. Suddenly, his body felt so heavy that he could barely move. It was as if all his muscles were stiff from lack of use, and when he tried to call for Alec one last time, his voice came out hoarse and no louder than a whisper. Abruptly, his vision shifted, and he could no longer see the dark hole that had swallowed Alec or feel the stone ground underneath him. Magnus knew then that he was no longer in Asmodeus' court. The blurry image of the city lights shining through his window confirmed that he was back in New York, the sensation of his magic powers reawakening and resurging with unusual strength the only relief he felt.

"Magnus," Catarina called to him, as she placed her hands on his shoulders, shaking him gently. "Thank the Angel, Magnus, you are back," she said with a deep sigh of relief.


	11. Chapter 11- The Seventh Circle

**The Seventh Circle**

"Wha-wha-what happened?" Magnus stammered in a rasping and barely audible voice as he struggled to get the words past his chattering teeth. He tried to hug himself and rub his hands up and down his arms, to warm himself and control the powerful shivers that were running wild through his system. But the movement intensified the pain in his extremities and the stiffness in his muscles made his arms feel like they were made of lead. He blinked a few times trying to clear the webs that still clouded his vision and took a couple of deep and ragged breaths to settle his rapidly beating heart.

He was confused and disoriented and his body was out of control, cold and hot, shivering and sweating at the same time. His magic, dormant and unresponsive for so long, was now suddenly awake, and it rushed through his veins, gushing like a torrent from the center of his being towards his fingers, looking for a way out. It was as if every cell in his body had abruptly come alive, reawaken with a startle; as if an explosion had gone off in his chest releasing all the magic that had remained bottled up for weeks. At the same time that his magic sought release, it also sought replenishment, reaching with invisible tendrils through his skin and the bottom of his feet, searching for sources of strength in the invisibles forces of nature that fuelled his magic. The conflicting need to release and replenish made him feel simultaneously bursting with and starving for magic, the sensations adding to his confusion.

"Wh-wha-what is happening?" Magnus asked again, desperation threatening to become full-blown panic.

"Just breath," replied Catarina who at that moment was wrapping a blanket around his shoulders. "Your body is going into shock because you had an abrupt awakening. Drink this, it will help, and please direct your fingers away from me. I don't fancy being turned into a dog right now" she added placing a cup in Magnus' shaking hands and giving him a reassuring smile.

"Alexander!" Magnus called out, panic and desperation winning over the shivers. The image of his lover's face with his arm extended towards him a second before Alec disappeared in the dark depths of the demon trap abruptly came back to Magnus' mind, vivid and clear in all its devastation.

"Do you have him?!" Catarina asked turning urgently to Tessa who at that moment was struggling to stay on her feet beside where Alec laid on the couch. Tessa was sending silver and white streams of magic into Alec's chest, but her powers were rapidly weakening. "Tessa, do you have him?" Catarina asked again as she moved to stand beside Tessa.

"No," Tessa replied after a moment and her powers sputtered a couple of times like an engine running out of fuel and then went out completely. She staggered back and would have fallen had Catarina not supported her. "He has passed beyond the reach of my magic."

"What!? Oh no, no, no," Magnus exclaimed and tried to stand up, his legs refusing to obey him, his head spinning, wild tendrils of magic flowing from his fingers and threatening to set the room on fire.

"Get a hold of yourself Magnus," Catarina ordered, her voice steady and forceful – the voice of a nurse used to working in the emergency room – "or you are going to set the apartment on fire and we have no way to scape." She then helped Tessa to the armchair. "The potion I just gave you will stop you from going into shock, drink it," she added, her tone an unquestionable command.

'Come on, get a grip,' Magnus told himself as he held the cup tightly with both hands and concentrated in stopping it from shaking as he lifted it to his lips. The liquid tasted bitter and sweet on his tongue and seemed to dull his senses a little as it went down. He then stood, and half walked, and half stumbled to where Alec laid, motionless and unconscious on the sofa, his face impassive, all color drained from it.

Suddenly, a blast of demonic energy, like a black cloud, gathered above their heads where it floated for a few moments before it began to swirl like a whirlwind, its vortex pointing straight at Alec's sternum. The whirlwind picked up speed and then abruptly disappeared into the Shadowhunter's chest, as if it had been sucked by a dark power emanating from Alec. Alec gasped, his chest swelling rapidly, his back arching against the sofa before relaxing and going completely still once again.

Magnus snapped his fingers trying to command his magic and reach with it towards Alec, to pull him back from wherever he was. But it was to no avail. The tendrils of magic found nothing to hold on to. He tried again, and with even more desperation projected tendrils of magic into Alec's chest, pushing the love he felt for the Shadowhunter along with his magic, searching for a thread, or even a sliver of Alec's soul, something, anything to grab onto and pull but found nothing. Unwilling to give up, he tried a third time and this time he imagined that his powers were a fishing line he was throwing into the void searching for anything to hook his magic to, any piece of Alec's beautiful soul. But even as he did, he knew it was futile. As Tessa had said, Alec had passed beyond the reach of simple spells.

"Magnus, you are going to wear yourself out," Catarina said as she came to stand beside him. She placed a gentle hand on Magnus' shoulder. "You won't get him back like this, and you may hurt him instead. We need time to come up with a better plan." She placed her other hand atop one of Magnus', the gesture meant to stop any further attempt to send another surge of magic towards Alec.

"What did you do Alexander?" Magnus' asked, losing the battle to stay on his feet. He fell on his knees, took Alec's hand in his, and buried his face in it, more despondency and desperation in his voice than Catarina had ever heard. "Tessa, Catarina, why did you let him go?" he added turning to his two friends who at that moment were looking from him to Alec, a mixture of sadness, horror and exhaustion in their expressions. He was not sure what he was asking; whether he was reproaching Tessa and Catarina for having helped Alec go rescue him, or whether he was blaming them for not having brought Alec back.

"I am sorry," Tessa replied from the sofa, "I tried to hold on to him as long as I could, but no matter how much I called to him, he refused to come back."

"What are we going to do now?" Catarina asked, an unusual tone of uncertainty in her voice. "We need another plan."

Just at that moment, a sound that resembled thunder echoed throughout the room, releasing what looked like lightening that illuminated the contours of the protective wards that surrounded the apartment. Magnus realized that the noise resembled the faint tapping sounds he had heard right before Asmodeus sent him back, except that this sound was closer and more powerful.

"Not now," Catarina exclaimed with a deep frustrated sigh. "She doesn't give up, does she?"

"What is going on?" Magnus asked, his voice a bit less hoarse. He looked up and saw how the lower layers of the wards, which were the oldest and thus the weakest, began to burn away.

"We are under attack," stated Tessa in a tired voice. "Celestina Rays didn't appreciate us stealing Aldous Nix's spell book from the Spiral Labyrinth."

"They have been trying to break through the wards for the last hour," Catarina added. "Thankfully Jem reinforced them with Silent Brother runes, or they would have broken through by now. Still, I don't think we have much time."

"You stole what?!" Magnus asked incredulously, his mind still having a hard time keeping up. "And you involved the Silent Brothers in this madness? One cannot go away for a few days without you getting yourself in trouble and dragging my boyfriend along." The intervention of the mysterious Nephilim order complicated things considerably. For that and the unusual presence of the Spiral Labyrinth in New York was bound to bring Shadowhunter attention.

"We did not involve the Silent Brothers," Tessa replied looking at Magnus with an expression that told him that she too understood the situation. "Just Jem, and he has been keeping watch from a few blocks away this whole time."

"Even his wards won't resist this attack for much longer," Catarina added as another blast resonated throughout the room.

"We have to get out of here, get Alec to a safer location," Magnus stated, standing up on still unsteady legs. With shaking hands, he reached under the collar of his shirt, looking for a small silver medallion he always wore hanging from a silver chain under his clothes. He felt weak and his head swam and all that kept him from keeling over was the adrenaline that had begun to flow through his veins and unused muscles. That and the desperation to keep Alec from further danger until he could figure out his next step.

"We are trapped," Catarina replied, "we cannot portal through the wards, and we have no hope of repelling Celestina's team of warlocks, not just the three of us."

"I can get us out," Magnus stated, renewed certainty in his tone. "Do you think I would live in a place that has no escape route?" he added in response to Catarina's dubious expression. "I have a portal that will get us out of here."

"But the wards…" Tessa started to say.

"This portal can pierce the wards," Magnus interrupted. He was removing the medallion from around his neck. It consisted of two circles, a smaller one on top of a slightly larger one. The top one resembled a small dial, an arrow engraved on it pointed to minute symbols on the edge of the larger circle. He placed the medallion in the palm of his hand and turned the dial three times to the left, one to the right and two to the left again, as if her was working the combination in a lock. As he did, a bright light began to shine in the palm of his hand, which he directed towards the middle of the room. "Come on," he instructed, "gather what you need, we are leaving."

With his free hand, Magnus directed a stream of blue and green magic towards Alec, lifting him off the sofa and carrying him towards where the energy emanating from the medallion was now becoming a fully formed portal. A minute later, as Magnus was about to step through the event horizon after Tessa and Catarina, an even more powerful blast of energy hit the roof burning away the last of the wards. Right before disappearing into the portal, he conjured up a spell that magically locked up tight all the places in his loft where he kept his most valued secrets and possession. If the spell held, the Spiral Labyrinth would be unable to gain access to his things. With his magic still hard to control and his body stiff, the effort to move Alec and activate the spell increased his dizziness and nausea.

As soon as Magnus emerged at the other side, he turned the medallion in his hands once again and the portal closed with a loud clank and a few sparkles of light. He then bent down and for a moment rested his hands on his knees trying to catch his breath and regain some of his self-control.

"You carry a portal around your neck Magnus?" Catarina asked astonished as she looked around the unfamiliar room. "I didn't know portals could be that small, or that they could pass through wards," she added as she guided Tessa to a stuffed white armchair and helped her sit down, the other warlock looking paler by the minute, suffering, Catarina was certain, from extreme power depletion.

"It is an old one." Tessa's soft voice was almost a whisper. "Old portals are very sturdy even if travelling through them can be bumpy. I had not travelled through one as old as this one since Will and I used to visit his parents more than a hundred years ago. I didn't know though they could be carried in something so small."

"Technically, portals can be of any size, for in truth, they have no dimension. I made this one soon after Henry Branwell and I created the first portal. Like all old portals, it can only travel between two places," Magnus explained as he straightens up and turned to make sure Alec was properly settled on a long white sofa. He spread a wool blanket over him and felt his forehead for any sign of fever or cold. Once he was sure that Alec was as comfortable as it was possible under the circumstances, he sat on the edge of the sofa, leaned his elbows on his knees and rested his head on his hands. He felt terribly exhausted and his mind was still full of cobwebs.

"Where are we?" Catarina asked looking around once again. The portal had deposited them in a spacious, airy and bright open concept room, decorated in white, buttercream and blue colors and adorned with nautical details and ocean blue carpets, which gave the room the impression of being a cottage by the sea. To one side, there was a modern kitchen and dining area and on the other, French doors led off to other rooms. Enormous uncovered glass windows looked out onto a landscape barely discernible in the early morning light. She could not see the sky even though light outside had begun to change from black to blue, as night slowly relinquished to morning. But she thought she heard the gentle sound of the ocean no far in the distance.

"This is my secret hideout, my treehouse by the sea," Magnus replied. "We are on a remote island on the west coast, about two hours by boat from the city of Vancouver in Canada," he added in reply to Catarina's still questioning expression.

"I didn't know you had a cottage in Canada. I didn't even know you liked cottages," Catarina said.

"It wouldn't be much of a secret hideout if people knew about it. We are safe here," Magnus said. "Not only is the forest around us very ancient and very dense, but it is also protected by wards. The only way in or out is through my portal. About a hundred and fifty years ago and in recognition for some services I provided, I got permission to build here from the Coast Salish peoples to whom these lands belong. Now tell me what happened. How did Alec end up in my father's court in Edom?" He gently brushed a lock of hair away from Alec's forehead and smoothed his shirt a little, the gesture loving and intimate.

"You father? Well that explains a lot," Catarina said looking from Magnus to Tessa, a mixture of surprise and dawning understanding in her eyes. "No wonder petrification got such as strong hold on you. But before we get into that, we need coffee and food. Tessa is about to keel over, and you don't look much better Magnus. I assume you have food in this hideout of yours," she added as she headed for the kitchen.

"Why did you let Alec go after me?" Magnus asked a few minutes later as he sat with his two friends at the kitchen counter, a half-finished cup of coffee and a half-eaten bagel in front of him. Tessa was washing down the remaining of a chocolate muffin that Catarina had conjured up from who knew where with the remaining of an enormous cup of hot chocolate, the drink and the food returning some of the color to her cheeks. Martinis and steaks had always been the remedy for Magnus when his powers were low; for Tessa it was chocolate while Catarina preferred Polish food and vodka.

"Did you think we could have stopped him?" Catarina asked. "You know very well he would have found the way to get to you, as you would have done the same for him. Besides, he was the best chance we had."

"I understand, but you don't know what that place is like," Magnus stated, his voice flooded with anguish. "I would have preferred to stay in that hell for an eternity to knowing that Alec is there now at the mercy of my father. My father was right, this is a worse vengeance and punishment than anything he might have done to me in his realm."

In the last few minutes, Magnus had quickly related the experience of having been trapped in Edom, giving just enough detail for his friends to fully understand the danger, keeping to himself the worse of his father's punishment. Tessa and Catarina, on their part, had told Magnus about Aldous Nix's spell book, his experiments with petrification, and the capture order Celestina Rays had issued against the three of them. They had also explained the methods they had used to send Alec's consciousness to Edom, including the effects of the first attempt on the Shadowhunter.

"Can we not use the same method with use with Alec to send you back there?" Tessa now asked.

"I don't think that is going to work this time," Magnus replied. "You were right, petrification traps its victims in order to torture them by making them live their worst nightmares and feed on their worst fears. What you don't know is that when you sent Alec to Edom, it wasn't his consciousness you sent; it was his soul. Petrification traps the soul and as the soul gets more and more entangled and lost, it and the body become a conduit, a gateway of sorts, that eventually allows demons to travel freely between hell and here. Only when the soul is completely defeated, can the demons be free to roam between the two realms." Magnus had gained that knowledge in a piecemeal way, as his father and his minions had unwittingly relinquished small morsels of information. In fact, it was his father the one to give him the first clue when he had said that through petrification, he would both take vengeance on Magnus and gain his freedom. Now Asmodeus was likely torturing Alec and there was nothing that Magnus could do to stop him. He looked at Alec's inert figure on the couch and thought that if it wasn't for the ever-growing dark cloud of magic and cold that seemed to be surrounding him, he would look like he was peacefully sleeping.

"That explains why Asmodeus took advantage of your momentary weakness to infect you and take hold of your soul," Catarina stated. "He will never forgive you for vanishing him and he has likely been trying to get back for centuries. And, it explains why he took Alec. Using a Nephilim soul as a gateway would give him a powerful weapon not to mention access, not only to the mundane world, but also, eventually, to Idris and the Nephilim."

"That also explains why the Spiral Labyrinth has gone to such lengths to keep the secrets of petrification hidden. Petrified warlocks are dangerous, and I would not be surprised if Celestina has ordered petrifying warlocks killed in the past," added Tessa. "But why can we not send you there like we did Alec?"

"First of all, my soul cannot access my powers, which means I would be defenseless and unable to fight my father," Magnus replied. "Secondly, I doubt Alec's soul is still in Edom. My father sent it to an even deeper level of hell. As I told you, I saw him fall." The memory of Alec's face, of his arm extended towards Magnus, of his brave attempt to reassure Magnus that he would be okay while his eyes could barely disguise the terror he felt would forever haunt him and he knew that all eternity would not be enough for him to repay Alec's sacrifice.

"Alright, what is the alternative then?" Catarina asked. "For I assume you have a plan in mind."

"I think I know where Alec is," Magnus stated. "He is trapped in the Seventh Circle. I plan to go there in body and soul." Magnus saw how puzzlement gave way to dawning understanding and then to full-blown fear in the faces of his two dear friends.

"That is madness even for you Magnus!" Catarina exclaimed, her cup half way between the counter and her lips. "Do you know how dangerous that is!?" she asked, the cup accentuating the urgency and alarm in her question with a thump as Catarina put it on the counter with a little bit more force than needed.

"I will go with you," Tessa stated, her voice calmer and less alarmed, even though Magnus could still read the apprehension on her face.

"Do not encourage him, Tessa!" Catarina's voice had quickly acquired the tone of a headmistress. "You do know what they say, don't you? That when Dante wrote the Inferno, he was not imagining, but rather describing what he had seen in hell. If that is true, the Seventh Circle is a barren and burning landscape, filled with murderers and blasphemers who have been condemned to cook in rivers of boiling blood and fire and to wander through a dessert of burning sand and burning rain. There is no guarantee that anyone can enter it at will, let alone that anyone can be rescued from it."

"The more reason for me to go" Magnus rebutted. "Imagine what that place can do to a Nephilim, full of demons, murderers, and necromancers, some of which were put there by Shadowhunters. Besides, I know how to get there, Catarina. Don't forget that I am my father's son. I have powers and knowledge beyond those of most warlocks. And, I will go alone," he added turning to his other friend. "Thank you, Tessa, but the Seventh Circle is no place for a half-Nephilim warlock. I need you here. In fact, my plan depends on both of you helping from this side."

In truth, Magnus' plan was still only half a plan. There were many details that he had yet to figure out and many others that he would have to leave to chance. But he would not let those details delay or discourage him. Even if there was just one in a million chance of entering into the Seventh Circle without Asmodeus noticing and of finding Alec and bringing him out, he would still go ahead, and he would not fail, no matter the cost.

"Magnus, you can barely stand," Catarina observed. "Just a few minutes ago you were going into shock and do not tell me that you have recovered. I know you. I can see the shaky hands and the unsteady legs. You are hanging on by a thread and at any minute you will fall over. How do you propose to master enough energy and strength to attempt this mad endeavour?"

"Catarina has a point, Magnus," Tessa said. "We could all use a rest. You can barely control your unruly magic. Just a minute ago, you were involuntarily shooting magic sparkles from your fingers and almost burning holes in the carpet. You were in a state of petrification for over a week. You need time to regain control, and neither I nor Catarina will be much help if we continue working without rest."

"I will be fine," Magnus argued even though he knew that his friends were correct. He had never felt so unsettled and out of control since his powers first started manifesting in childhood. It wasn't that his powers were depleted. In fact, he could feel more energy than usual coursing through his system. Rather, it felt like after days of his soul being trapped between places, unable to access his magic, he was having a hard time grabbing the reins of his powers. He felt like he was riding a wild horse, except that the horse was him.

"You know," Catarina said, and a smile began to curb the corners of her lips, the gesture suggesting that she had given up on the argument. "You and Alec are made for each other. He was eager to jump into the fire without certainty that he would come back. In fact, he even refused to return when Tessa called him. He did all that with only the small hope of getting you back. You are now willing to do the same. I don't understand the reason for your fight if you are so obviously in love with one another." Catarina threw her arms in the air in a gesture of frustration and surrender. "But I will not agree to do anything until we all, and specially you Magnus, get some rest. I am not inclined to have all of us dragged into hell just because we went in unprepared and in a rush." The warlock's last words were categorical and left no room for debate.

Magnus looked towards Alec, his peaceful sleeping face not betraying any feelings or emotions. Yet Magnus feared, with a terror that he had no words to express, that Alec was at the moment trapped in a hell he even had a hard time imagining. The possibility of ending up in the Seventh Circle of hell had always been a prospect that had kept warlocks from getting into too much trouble, and now he was planning to voluntarily go there. Yet, he would not have it any other way. Alec had gone to Edom for him, and now he would go get him back.

"Why did you and Alec fight?" Tessa asked three hours later, picking up where their earlier conversation had left off.

She and Magnus had spent the last three hours in quiet companionship in the living room while Catarina napped in one of the guest bedrooms. Tessa had alternated between periods of dossing off in one of the armchairs, consulting some of the books on magic in Magnus' library and checking in on Alec. Meanwhile, Magnus had done a complex series of exercises meant to reinforce and tune-up his mastery over his powers and had spent the rest of the time studying Aldous's spell book and comparing it to his own. Except for a quick shower and a much-needed change of clothes, which Catarina had insisted on by unceremoniously telling Magnus that he stunk worse than a skunk, he had remained in the room at all times, keeping constant watch over Alec, paying attention to even the most minute of changes. He was now once again sitting on the edge of the sofa on which Alec laid, and after resting a hand against Alec's cheek for a moment, he brushed a lock of hair off his forehead.

Tessa observed her friend's caring and loving gestures and marvelled at how much they mirrored Alec's earlier ministrations towards Magnus. She knew that while Magnus had a great investment in appearing distant, glamorous and sometimes aloof, he was in fact a gentle soul, someone who craved the affection that he had been denied as a child. As a result, he was a generous and caring friend. She had experienced that generosity and care first hand at a moment in her life in which she felt utterly devastated. Yet, he had never seen him express so much love so openly to a partner or lover before.

"In the grand scheme of things, the reason seems trivial now," Magnus replied as he shifted his gaze from Alec to Tessa. "The truth is that what I feel for Alexander scared me, and I think his feelings for me scared him too. As you know, it is not easy to fall in love and commit to a mortal. I suspect it is equally challenging to commit to spend one's life with immortals like us. For things appear so perfect at the beginning but, sometimes, the certainly of loss at the end of the journey, of being separated by years and death can become daunting. I faltered because I didn't think I could handle losing Alec at the end of it all. I took advantage of a mistake, a moment of confusion on Alec's part, to run away, to save myself the agony that the certainty of losing him would cause me. I didn't know that the reality of being without him so soon would be worse."

As he finished speaking, Magnus looked out towards the green and blue landscape outside the windows. The morning sunlight filtered through the trees in tones of yellows, blues, and greens illuminating his features and making him seem younger and more vulnerable somehow, nothing like the powerful warlock image he always tried to project. Tessa followed his gaze and admired once again the beautiful scenery that seemed to melt into the room.

Once the sun had come up, Tessa had finally understood why Magnus called this a treehouse by the sea. The cottage was somehow suspended tens of meters above ground and was nestled among the canopy of some of the oldest and tallest trees in the continent. Some of the them were almost a thousand years old and their age was reflected in their thick trunks and great heights. Just a few meters from their window, the forest came to the edge of an inlet, its waters calm and deep blue. Magnus had mentioned that during certain times of the year, he could see from his window families of whales swimming in the peaceful waters. Odd, thought Tessa, that someone who was so comfortable in the hustle and bustle of a city like New York, could also be so at home in this quiet and almost unspoiled setting. Yet, when she thought about it now as she observed Magnus, she realized that this was an appropriate setting for someone as old as him. For sitting among such ancient trees, tress that had already been mature when her friend was born, could certainly provide perspective and grounding.

"You know very well how much I can related to your fears and feelings," Tessa gently said as she placed a hand atop Magnus'. "You and I are similar in that respect: loss for us is hard specially when we love so intensely and deeply as you love Alec and I loved Will. But Magnus, loves like the one that you and Alec obviously share come only once in a lifetime even for us that live so long. Don't spoil it with unnecessary doubts. Catarina is correct: you and Alec love each other so completely and so openly that each one is ready to go literally to the end of the earth for the other. That is priceless."

Magnus looked away from the window to Tessa and smiled. "You are right, of course. Once I get Alec back from that place, I will…"

But Magnus did not have a chance to say what he would do once he got Alec back, for at that moment, Alec gave a loud and ragged gasp, his chest swelled, his back arched against the sofa, and his face became a mask of intense pain. Magnus stood up with unbelievable speed and looked with horror as the skin on Alec's face and arms turned red and began to blister, big and ugly red blisters that quickly covered almost every inch of him, as if an invisible fire was burning him alive.

"We are out of time," Magnus exclaimed in a panicky voice as he snapped his fingers and directed healing and cooling streams of magic in Alec direction, his magic still a little wild. "I have to go get Alec right now."


	12. Chapter 12 - Red Hell

**Red Hell**

"Just a few more steps, Alexander, and we will take a break," Magnus said, imbuing as much encouragement as he could into the words. He half carried and half-dragged a limping Alec along, pushing past the exhaustion that seized his own muscles. The arm that Alec had wrapped over Magnus' shoulders was hot and slippery with sweat and his body felt unusually heavy and tall against Magnus' body. When Alec stumbled on a rock, Magnus had to tighten his grip around Alec's waist to avoid them both falling on the dry and scorching sand. The movement caused Alec to gasp in pain, the air making a wheezing sound as it entered his lungs. By the time they reached the small crevice in the rocky face of the mountain, Alec's head sagged against his chest and his eyes were barely open. As soon as they were inside the small shelter, Magnus helped him lean against the rock and slide down to a sitting position on the ground.

Magnus examined Alec more carefully then and saw with apprehension the red and angry burns and blisters that covered his face and arms, and the deep cuts that had ripped his shirt and the skin on his chest and back. Telling by his difficulty breathing, Magnus suspected that Alec also had at least one broken rib. When he lifted the right leg of his pants, Magnus saw with unease that Alec's right ankle was terribly swollen and bruised, likely the result of a fracture from when one of the demons Alec had been fighting grabbed him with its sharp and strong talons.

"I cannot heal you or ease your pain right now, Alexander," he said, his voice full of anguish. "We need all my powers to make it to the exit point and get out of here. Can you manage?"

"I will be okay, Magnus," Alec said, his voice as reassuring as he could manage considering the pain and exhaustion he was feeling.

"I know you will. You are tough and strong." Magnus rested his hand against Alec's soot-covered cheek and smiled, admiration and concern coloring the smile. He wanted to kiss him, tell him how glad he was to have found him, how much his heart was bursting with joy now that he could look into his eyes and touch his face, but he restrained himself. The memories of the terrible desolation they had just witnessed was still fresh in his mind and if he was going to kiss Alec, he didn't want to do it in this place or while holding those memories. Besides, they were far from safe, had still some distance to go, and were bound to find even more perils on their path.

"I knew you would come for me," Alec said, his voice strained and his breathing shallow, yet his eyes were still warm and gentle. "I saw it in your eyes when I fell down that hole. I knew you couldn't be that mad at me to leave me here."

"Of course, I was going to come for you," Magnus replied as he sat beside Alec and took his hand. "And, I am not mad at you. Even if I was, I could never be mad at you for long, you know that."

It had taken a couple of attempts for he, Catarina and Tessa to figure out the right spell and the correct configuration of the pentagram that opened the doorway through which Magnus came into the Seventh Circle. Even as he stepped into the flaming pentagram they had drawn on the floor in the center of the room, Magnus still remained uncertain whether this one would lead him to the correct destination.

"You know what you have to do," he had told Tessa and Catarina, reminding them of their plan, hoping his friends' powers would not fail them at the end. The last thing he had seen right before the orange flames became a wall of fire and the gateway opened into this barren, hot and crimson landscape, was the anxious faces of the two women.

Magnus had entered the Seventh Circle at a point in which the barrier that separated this realm from the mundane world was at its weakest, a spot located near the petrified trunk of a long-dead tree about a kilometer from the foot of a tall rocky mountain. As soon as he had stepped through the doorway, Magnus had looked around and had instantly known that he had arrived at the correct destination. The endless sky was a deep and scorching scarlet, completely devoid of sun, moon or stars, the red interrupted only by occasional black clouds. Between the clouds, winged demons flew in circles searching for pray. The ground was a similar tone of red, covered in sections with loose hot sand while in others, the parched hard soil was cracked in long and deep furrows that were a hazard to anyone walking through them. Rivers of boiling rock and lava scorched the terrain as they flowed down from the mountain. The rivers, together with the rock formations and the skeleton of burned trees scattered around the immense landscape, were the only landmarks that distinguished scarlet ground from crimson sky. Overall, the landscaped was an endless wasteland. The air was so dried and hot that Magnus' eyes felt like they were cooking in their sockets and his throat and lungs burned every time he took a breath.

Magnus had taken a moment to get his bearing, trying to figure out where a Shadowhunter might seek refuge in this interminable and inhospitable place. He had surveyed the sky once again and had seen that, far in the distance, in a place between what looked like a riverbank and a rock formation, a flock of demons flew in circles like vultures circling dying pray. Every so often, one or more of the demons dived down while the others continued their macabre dance of death. Suddenly, one of the demons issued an agonizing cry of pain which the rest of the flock echoed with cries of their own before renewing their attack on whatever target was putting up a fight on the ground. Something had told Magnus that that was the place where he would find Alec, that if Alec found himself in a place surrounded by demons, he would never go down without a fight.

With nothing else but that speculation to support his decision, Magnus had adjusted Alec's bow and quiver across his back and had set off at a run in the direction of the demons, hoping, first, that his hunch would pay off and, then, that he would arrive on time. Before leaving, he had cast a simple spell to mark the place where he hoped he would be able to reopen the doorway that would take him and Alec home. The spell was tied to his own magic and was designed to act as a homing beacon guiding him back.

Magnus was unaccustomed to carrying weapons, having always relied solely on his magic, and while the bow and quiver remained closely fasten to his back, he still felt their weight and bouncing every time his feet hit the ground. Tessa and Catarina had questioned his decision to carry the weapons, but he had argued that Alec would need them to help him fight their way out of the Seventh Circle. He had known all along that Asmodeus would not let them leave without a fight and that he and Alec would have a much better chance if they were both properly armed. Besides, he doubted that Alec would simply stand aside and let him face his father alone, and he, Magnus, would feel much better if Alec had a means to defend himself.

He had run as fast as he could through open terrain, trying to avoid being detected by either the winged demons or any other creature lurking or rummaging on the ground. He had known that if he was going to succeed, he needed to remain undetected by his father or the members of his court for as long as possible. For that reason, he had relied exclusively on his physical prowess, avoiding using magic for fear that his father would detect the variations in the energy field that the use of warlock magic was bound to create. He also knew he would need all his powers to get himself and Alec out. He was in good shape but after a while of running in the almost unbearable heat, through uneven and hazardous terrain, and without magic assistance, his muscles had begun to scream for a break.

Magnus had kept a close eye on the ground to void stumbling and falling on the sand, or breaking a foot, or worse a leg, on a crack or rock. But every few moments and in order to make sure he was going in the right direction, he had looked up at the gleamingly crimson sky and at the winged demons that remained locked in the battle with whom Magnus hoped was Alec. After what felt like an eternity, he had finally reached the massive rock formation behind which the demons were intensifying their attack. Keeping his back flat against the rock, Magnus had begun to slowly follow its curb hoping the demons would not detect his approach.

And there, at the other side of the rock formation, Magnus had finally found Alexander Lightwood, his Alexander, cornered between the rock and the riverbank, locked in battle with a flock of murderous monsters. Alec held a long makeshift lance in his hand made from a tree branch and what looked like sharp stone pieces tied at both ends with strips of leather from his Shadowhunter jacket. With swift, sinuous and powerful movements that were elegant despite his fatigue and injuries, Alec swung the lance back and forth, alternating between blocking and charging with all his strength. His back was to the rock face, which, Magnus suspected, offered Alec protection from attacks from behind.

Despite his swift movements, Magnus had clearly seen the exhaustion and pain in Alec's expression. His face was covered in a mixture of dirt and sweat, and his hair stuck to his forehead and to the back of his neck. He was also injured. Deep scratches crisscrossed his chest, shoulders and back. The skin in his arms and face was also covered in red and blistering burns, and as he moved from side to side, he limped. Still, he fought fiercely and with unnatural agility, a look of determination, concentration and ferocity in his deep brown eyes.

A quick survey of the terrain had told Magnus that Alec had, so far, had some success. For the bodies of at least two monsters were strewn on the ground, ichor seeping from deep stab holes and staining the ground black. At least two of the flying demons also exhibited holes in the membranes that covered their leathery wings.

Magnus had barely had enough time to let go of the breath he had been holding ever since he had seen Alec fall through his father's demon trap, and to ascertain that, while Alec was fierce and brave in battle, he was also weakening fast. Careful not to distract the Shadowhunter, Magnus had taken the bow and quiver from across his back and, using magic for the first time since he had entered the Seventh Circle, jumped atop the rock and set off at a run in Alec's direction. If Alec saw his approach or felt his presence, he didn't give any sign of awareness or surprise, focused as he was on repelling the attack of a demon that was trying to sink its enormous talons in his shoulders.

As soon as he reached a spot atop the rock that was directly behind Alec, Magnus had snapped his fingers and had sent a powerful surge of magic that instantly dispatched the demon intent on grabbing Alec. Immediately after that, he propelled himself off the rock, and as he summersaulted in midair, he sent the bow and quiver in Alec's direction with a short burst of magic, before firmly landing on the ground right between Alec and the demons.

Alec had let go of his makeshift weapon and, extending an arm over his head, had caught his bow and quiver in midair with surprising agility and accuracy. In a swift and practiced moment, he had then wrapped the quiver around his back and nocked an arrow.

As soon as his feet touched the ground, Magnus had allowed himself the briefest of glances back towards Alec. Alec had rewarded him with an equally brief smile and nod, before coming to stand beside Magnus and turning once again towards the demons, and arrow already trained on their enemy.

Anyone watching Alec and Magnus in action would have been surprised by how easily and fluidly Alec moved with Magnus' powers, how sinuously and harmoniously magic and arrow moved together. It was as if Shadowhunter and Warlock were locked in a dance they had memorized so well that each could anticipate the move of the other a split second before it happened; as if they could read each other's minds and bodies to such an extent that they could predict the direction of their thoughts and the movement of their muscles.

Over the next handful of minutes and in quick succession, Alec and Magnus had dispatched three of the demons, their arrow-pierced and magic-burned bodies hitting the ground with loud thuds amid the cry of their comrades. A fourth one had attempted to, once again, grab and lift Alec by sinking its talons in his shoulders before Magnus turned and sent a stream of red hot magic into its midsection, causing the demon to explode in thousands of burning pieces. When the biggest of the demons dived down, its enormous wings fully deployed, and its sharp talons fully extended, Alec had released an arrow that Magnus propelled with hot streams of magic in the direction of the demon's chest. The monster issued an agonizing shriek when the red-hot arrow pierced him from side to side. It then exploded, and his body hit the ground with a loud crashing sound. The remaining of the flock had flown away amid cries and screeches, either in swift retreat or in search of reinforcements.

Once he was sure the monsters were sufficiently far away to no longer pose immediate threat, Magnus had turned just in time to see Alec fall on one knee, an arm wrapped around himself, obviously exhausted and injured. "Alexander!" Magnus had called as he run at full speed towards the Shadowhunter arriving just in time to stop Alec before he completely collapsed to the ground.

"Magnus," Alec had said, between wheezing breaths, "You sure know how to make an entrance."

"I've got you," Magnus had responded and smiled, happier and more relieved to look into Alec's beautiful eyes than he had been in a long time. Alec had begun to cough, his breathing coming even more raggedly as the last of the adrenaline in his system burned out. Magnus had patted him on the back while he tried to catch his own breath. He considered using some of his powers to ease Alec's pain, but realizing the uncertainty of their situation, had decided against it. "We have to go, Alexander," he had said after a moment of surveying the sky. "The demons are bound to come back with reinforcements, and it is likely that Asmodeus already detected my presence. Can you walk?"

"Yes," Alec had said, his voice a ragged whisper and as he stood, the expression of agony on his face breaking Magnus' heart. "But I cannot run. We need to find cover, or we will be too exposed."

They had agreed to head straight for the shelter of the mountain's shadow and from there walk along its foot towards the spot where Magnus had opened the gateway. Their progress had been slow and hazardous, each step bringing Alec more intense agony and increasing his reliance on Magnus for support.

As they slowly and painfully made their way, Magnus, who had previously been singularly focused on finding Alec, had had a first chance to look around. What he saw filled him with horror and dread. For there, across the dry and hot terrain, hundreds of bodies were walking along, half-naked bodies that were no more than shadows, exhausted and emaciated, their skin marked by the scars of horrible burns, the bones in their back and shoulders sticking out, their eyes sunken, the expression in their faces vacant and listless, the sparkle of life completely gone from them. They dragged their feet along the crimson landscape aimlessly and seemingly without destination, apparently no longer caring about what they had left behind or what awaited them, pushing along towards nowhere and coming from nowhere, completely and utterly resigned to their fate. Magnus couldn't say whether those poor souls were alive, for they had already crossed the threshold that separated life from death. Yet, neither could he call them dead for death was supposed to bring a relief that they had been denied.

"This is hell," Alec had quietly said, as he observed Magnus' anguished expression. "These are the souls that get trapped here: torturers, rapists, murderers and serial killers who have been condemned to endless wondering through this terrible place."

Suddenly, one of the shadows had detached itself from the crowd and had half walked and half stumbled towards Alec and Magnus, her eyes brighter and more focused and her clothes less ragged than that of the others. "Help me!" she had pleaded extending her arms towards them, reaching for Magnus' hand or perhaps the hem of his shirt. "I don't belong here, I don't know why I am here, please take me with you. Please, I just want to go home. I will give you anything!" she begged between desperate sobs.

Seeing the look of hesitation and compassion in Magnus' eyes, Alec had squeezed his hand, recalling his attention. "We cannot help her," he had said between gasps of pain. "Trust me, Magnus, I have tried. We would only call more attention to ourselves," he had added when Magnus turned to look at him, an uncomprehending and pained expression on his face. Alec had smiled, a smile so sad that it tugged at something deep in Magnus' heart. He had then gently coaxed Magnus to move away and continue walking.

A moment later, a loud shriek had echoed in the sky and when they turned and looked up, they had seen a demon dive down, its talon extended towards the woman. The woman had issued a loud cry of terror and cowered on the ground. "Please, don't let it take me," she had begged, looking at Alec and Magnus with a desperation that had yet to turn to hopelessness, and Magnus had recognized in the expression the last remnants of the sparkle of life.

Magnus and Alec had crouched close to the ground trying to blend in with the terrain. "Help me please! Don't let it take me!" the woman had cried out again as the demon sank its talons on her shoulders and lifted her off the ground, taking off with quick and powerful flaps of its leathery wings. About a hundred meters out, the demon had let go of the woman and as she plummeted towards the boiling lava of one of the rivers, she screamed, a scream of agony and terror that overpowered all other sounds. Yet none of the other souls had looked up or seemed to notice as they continued their drifting going nowhere and coming from nowhere.

"We need to keep moving," Alec had said calling Magnus' attention back to him, and when Magnus had looked into his eyes, he had seen more experience and knowledge there than anyone, not even a Shadowhunter his age should ever have. Magnus had realized at that moment that Alec would leave a major part of his innocence in this terrible place, and that he would forever be changed by his ordeal. He just hoped he, Magnus, would have enough years to fill Alec's life with joyful memories that could perhaps sufficiently obscure these ones, even if he could never erase them.

Now they had finally reached a place where they could allow themselves a short reprieve. As Magnus sat beside Alec inside their small rocky shelter and held his hand, he kept a close eye on the rhythm and frequency of his breathing and hoped that, no matter how much the Seven Circle marked him, Alec would at least get a chance to come out of it alive.

"How much longer Magnus," Alec asked, his voice betraying all the exhaustion his body felt.

"About a kilometer," Magnus replied, the spell he had left to mark their exit point tugging at his magic with increasing intensity. "But from now on, we have to proceed across open terrain. The spot is about a kilometer from the foot of the mountain."

"Okay, but you must promise me that you will keep going even if I fall behind, that you will take the exit even if I do not make it."

"I will promise no such thing," Magnus replied, outrage winning over exhaustion in his voice. "You know very well, Alexander, that you would never make such a promise either. Either we both leave, or neither of us leaves."

Alec's reply was a loving smile and a simple nod, and the smile and the nod soften Magnus' expression and warmed that place deep within him where he kept his most profound feelings for the Shadowhunter. At that moment he knew the two of them were entering into an unbreakable pact, a pact that bound Alec to push beyond his human strength, and Magnus to carry him as far as was needed until they both made it to the finish line.

"Now Alexander, I need you to picture something," Magnus said and gently patted Alec's hand a couple of times. "Do you remember the night of Izzy's birthday?" The smile that rose to Alec's lips told Magnus that the Shadowhunter remembered perfectly. "Do you remember what we did and where we went that night?"

It had been a memorable night. It was also the first and only time Magnus had taken Alec to his treehouse by the sea. Izzy had decided to celebrate her twenty-fifth birthday with a sushi and cocktails party on the terrace of a fashionable restaurant in Manhattan: a place run by Downworlders but that also catered to mundanes and that overlooked a stunning view of the city. Izzy had invited many of their Shadowhunter and Downworld friends and, at the beginning, the Nephilim had been reluctant to mingle because many of them were unaccustomed to associating with Downworlders. But as the music played, the alcohol flowed, and the food cheered people up, the gathering had become lively and even raucous. Alec who was usually reserved and rather serious, and who rarely engaged in public displays of affection towards anyone, not even Magnus, had had a few too many sake martinis and had soon been laughing openly, and his hand had several times reached for Magnus' hand.

At one point, feeling a little drunk himself and searching for some quiet, Magnus had wondered off towards the concrete and glass balustrade that surrounded the terrace. Alec had joined him there a few minutes later. He had approached in his usual quiet and stealthy manner and had wrapped his arms around Magnus, resting his chin on Magnus' shoulder. Magnus had leaned against Alec's tall and strong body, and Alec had tightened the embrace trapping Magnus between his body and the railing. After a minute in which they both had looked towards the distance, and completely unconcerned about anyone who might be watching, Alec had kissed Magnus on the spot where his neck met his shoulder and had then began an enticing and exiting journey upwards planting kisses as he went. "I would make love to you right here right now, if I could," he had whispered when he reached Magnus' ear.

"Wouldn't that be a scandal, what would you mother say?" Magnus had responded in a teasing voice, glancing towards the lively gathering, and seeing Maryse Lightwood there. He had then turned his face searching for Alec's lips, the taste of alcohol mixing with the unmistakable taste of Alec making the kiss all the more seductive.

"Take me someplace secluded then if you don't want scandal," Alec had said when their lips momentarily parted.

Magnus had not thought about twice. In fact, he didn't think he had thought about it at all. As Alec continued exploring his mouth, his tongue inviting Magnus' tongue to dance, his body so strong and close, his hands slowly starting a journey under Magnus' shirt, Magnus had reached for the medallion around his neck. By sheer instinct, he had turned the dial, producing the portal and puling it close, as one dons a coat or a cloak, the portal engulfing them. They had left the party without even taking a step in any direction, and as soon as Magnus could no longer feel the balcony's railing against his body, he had turned and entangling the fingers of one hand in Alec's hair, and the other in his shirt, he had given himself completely to the sensation of Alec's body awakening against his own. He had stepped backward pulling Alec along until he felt the edge of the bed against the back of his legs. He had then turned them both and had pushed Alec's gently onto the bed. That night, Alec had lighted the match and Magnus had caught fire and they had become lost to the world, just two bodies rejoicing in the incredible sensation of being young, free and in love; two bodies locked in a dance as old as time itself, searching together for the most sublime and sweet of ecstasies.

Hours later, a bumping sound in the darkness had awoken Magnus, a bump followed by an ouch in Alec's unmistakable voice. "Alexander, what is going on, where are you going?" Magnus had asked as he fumbled in the darkness searching for the light switch on the night table. When he had not been able to find it, he had given up and instead had snapped his fingers and created a flame that bathed the room in a soft blue light.

"I am trying to find the door to the bathroom. Where are we Magnus?" Alec had asked looking around the room with an expression of confusion, his voice thick with sleep, his eyes half closed.

"We are in my cottage," Magnus had replied. "The bathroom is through the door at other side of the room. That one leads to the closet," he had added with a sleepy smile. Magnus had finally found the light switch and had flip it on and had then observed as a naked Alec walked with sleepwalk steps towards the other side of the room and then through the door leading to the ensuite bathroom.

"I didn't know you had a cottage," Alec had said when he came back to the room and climbed back on the bed a few moments later. He had scooped behind Magnus and had wrapped his arms around him, Magnus jumping a little when he felt Alec's cool and still a-little-wet-hands against his skin. "Sorry, I washed my hands with cold water," he had added in a whisper. "How did we get here?"

"Don't you remember? You asked me to take you someplace quiet. It doesn't get any quieter than this."

"Yeah, but I thought we had gone back to your apartment."

"You were obviously distracted," Magnus had said with a coy smile as he snapped his fingers to turn off the light. He had then wrapped Alec's hands in his own and had brought them up to his lips and kissed them, the feel and taste of his cool skin refreshing and enticing.

"That is your fault, warlock. You were the one distracting me," Alec had whispered in his ear and had then kissed him gently but oh so seductively on his neck, the feel awakening every cell his lips touched on Magnus' skin and sending shivers down his spine. Alec had freed one of his hands from Magnus' gentle grasp and had run it with feather-like fingers along Magnus' chest and abdomen, drawing enticing and maddening circles as it slowly made its way down and down and down Magnus' naked body, giving indescribable and infinite pleasure with each millimetre of the path it travelled. As he did, Alec planted a string of kissed up and down Magnus' neck, his breathing sending a gentle freeze against his skin.

Magnus had gasped loudly when Alec's hand reached those places in which Alec knew he felt the most pleasure and had leaned even further against Alec's body, wanting to melt into the strong body of the Shadowhunter, surrendering to the exquisite sensation of Alec's hands and mouth exploring him. The sleepiness of a moment ago was all but gone, replaced by the incredible feeling of every cell of his body responding to the pull of Alec's desire.

"Oh Magnus," Alec had exclaimed, the words interrupted by loud intakes of air passing through his lips. "You are so delicious, especially in the middle of the night. Having you in bed just like this, naked and wanting me feels… I have not words to describe it." He had then enticed Magnus to turn his head, so he could claim his lips for a deep and passionate kiss, parting his lips and inviting Magnus' tongue to claim his mouth.

"Alexander, you never cease to amaze me," Magnus had replied a long while later. "I don't know how you do it, but you do it every time. I can never have enough of you." Almost by instinct, Magnus had begun to move against Alec, slow and blissful undulations that enticed Alec to relinquish his self-control at the same time than Magnus let go of his own. In moments, they had been moving at unison, completely unaware of their surroundings, of the stars that had momentarily peeked between the clouds and looked down on them through the skylight above their bed. Magnus had called Alec's name, loudly and full of passion and devotion, and Alec had done the same as they both had come undone in each other's arms, each of their orgasms breaking like waves against one another. Afterwards and as their breathing settled, they had laid on their backs and gazed through the skylight at the night as it slowly began to turn into morning.

"Do you remember that night?" Magnus now asked as he looked at Alec with a loving and caring smile. He fixed his eyes on the exhausted eyes of the Shadowhunter, enticing him to recall. "You said that you would love me even after there was no life left in the world and the oceans and rivers run dry."

"And you said," Alec added returning the smile, his voice barely disguising the exhaustion and pain that seized every inch of him, "that you would love me even after there were no longer moon and stars to shine in the sky."

"That's right," Magnus replied with a sigh of relief, his smile becoming even wider. "It is imperative that you remember the place where we went that night Alexander. Picture it as clear as you can in your mind, as if you were there right now. We need to get back there," he added. He didn't mention the cottage, or its location, because he didn't want his father where they were going. Standing up, Magnus wrapped one of Alec's arms around his own shoulders and pulled him to his feet, each inch of movement an agony. Not for the first time, Magnus wished that Alec had a stele, so he could draw a healing or strength rune on himself, even though he knew that angelic magic did not work here.

They were soon walking away from the mountain, and as they advanced, they picked up speed, pushing beyond exhaustion and pain. Alec kept an eye on the sky surveying for any threat, painfully aware that there were now completely exposed. Meanwhile, Magnus searched for the petrified tree he had first seen upon entering the Seventh Circle, the magic homing signal calling to him with increasing intensity.

"There," he said a while later as he pointed to the skeleton of the tree that stood about two hundred meters away. He pulled Alec along with even more determination, eager to close the distance between themselves and their exit route, almost tasting freedom. When they were about thirty meters away, he swiftly snapped his fingers and began to send a series of short bursts of magic, silver and white, into the middle of the tree trunk, following the sequence he, Tessa and Catarina had agreed on, signaling to his two friends that he and Alec were ready to go home.

"Here we go," Catarina said at that moment, as she stood up from the armchair in which she had been keeping watch and looked up at the faint blinking lights that come out of the pentagram and momentarily shone on the ceiling.

Hearing the pronouncement, Tessa approached Alec's inert body on the sofa, and bringing to his lips the fortifying potion that Catarina had prepared, poured it into his mouth, using magic to ease its passage down Alec's throat.

Alec's body was in bad shape. The blisters, bruises, fractures and deep cuts that had been appearing on him for the last several hours gave painful testimony to the punishment that his soul was enduring. Using a damp cloth, Tessa dried the perspiration from Alec's brow as she sent a final prayer to the Angel asking for Alec's body to remain strong through the remaining of his ordeal. When she was certain that the potion had begun to take effect, she took a step back and extended her arms wide, seeking and searching for the forces of nature that fed warlock magic, pulling the threads of magic she found towards herself as she absorbed the vital substances they carried, hoping to build enough power to perform the incantations needed to pull Alec's soul out of the Seventh Circle and back into his body.

Meanwhile, Catarina lighted the dozens of white and silver candles scattered around the room, keeping one in her hand as she waited for the moment in which she would light the mixture of black power and magnesium with which she had delineated the shape of the pentagram. She knew she would need to be quick, that the success of their plan depended on bringing Alec and Magnus out almost at the same time. She just hoped that Magnus and Alec would be the only ones to get out, that no demon, and certainly not Asmodeus, would try to hitch a ride.

"A few more meters," Magnus said as he lent more and more of his strength to Alec, prompting him to keep going, to not lose hope.

"Did you really think we would let you leave our realm with the Nephilim?" came Asmodeus' already familiar drawling voice from somewhere behind Magnus and Alec. The words and the voice sent a chilling shiver down Magnus' spine and he had to stifle the gasp that rose to his lips. Without letting go of Alec, and still supporting the majority of his weight, Magnus turned. There, no more than five meters away, stood the man, or rather the demon, that had once fathered Magnus, the monster that had once given Magnus' mother a gift so terrible that she had cut her own life short just to run away from it.

"Keep going Alexander," Magnus whispered just loud enough for Alec to hear. "Just a few more meters and you will be home free. I will be right behind you."

But Alec refused to go. Instead, he mastered all remaining strength left in him to take a step away from Magnus, remove the last two arrows left in the quiver that Magnus was again carrying strapped to his back and take a defensive position, his feet firmly planted on the ground, one arrow in each hand as if they were blades, ready to defend or attack. At that moment, they both remembered the promise they had made, that they would escape together or not at all.

"Alec and I are leaving this godforsaken place," Magnus stated, his voice firm and full of conviction, his arms in front of his body ready to call on his powers. "You cannot stop us, father." The word father seemed to get momentarily caught between Magnus' clenched teeth.

"Do you really think that we would not notice your presence?" Asmodeus asked in a mocking tone, seemingly unconcerned about the threat that an exhausted warlock and an injured Nephilim might pose. He paced back and forth, one skeletal hand behind his back, the other on a silver cane at his side. He no longer wore a cloak but rather an impeccable black suit that accentuated even more his gaunt features. Despite the black glamor he had donned on, his eyes retained their evil glare. "We felt your presence the moment you stepped into our realm," he added. "We could have stopped you sooner, but it was just so entertaining to see you holding on to hope that we wanted you to hold on to it until the last possible moment. The more you embrace that silly human sentiment, the sweeter our vengeance when we take it from you."

"We are leaving," Alec stated firmly and, putting a hand on Magnus' elbow, pulled him backwards. "Come on Magnus."

"Ha, and how do you intend to do that Angel's child?" Asmodeus asked looking at Alec for the first time, a malevolent grin on his face. "Do you really think that your angelic body will accept your soul after it has been irremediably tainted and spoiled by hell? Neither of you is going anywhere: Magnus because it is our desire that he shall return to our side, and you, Nephilim, because, through you, we will regain our freedom. Just imagine the havoc that the demonic poison circulating through your body is wreaking, and that is just the beginning." Asmodeus' face was full of glee and his body seemed to vibrate with anticipation. "It will soon be completely in our control. Just one more blow…" Asmodeus trailed off as, with a swift movement of his hand, he sent a blast of blackened red energy in Alec's direction.

Reacting on pure instinct, Magnus took two blindingly fast steps and came to stand in front of Alec, his magic already alive between his fingers. With one rapid movement of his own arm, he blocked the blast and redirected it back towards Asmodeus. Asmodeus took a step to one side to dodge the blast and the ball of magic flew past him and hit a rock, the heat melting it into lava.

Anticipating the demon's move, Alec swung an arm back and threw one of the arrows in the direction towards which Asmodeus stepped, knowing that as soon as the arrow left his hand, Magnus would fortify it with magic. The arrow flew through the air – a purple and red tail trailing behind it – and lodged itself in Asmodeus' chest. Before the arrow even hit its target, Alec grabbed Magnus by the back of his shirt and began to pull him backwards towards where a blue and silver light had begun to shine on a spot on the ground near the tree trunk. They moved at unison, careful not to turn their backs on Asmodeus.

"Stupid boy," Asmodeus said as he looked down at the arrow in his chest. He then pulled it out and broke it in two, the two halves falling on the ground at his feet. "Do you really think that you can injured a prince of hell?" He propelled himself upwards, wings unfolding as he took flight, his eyes no longer black, but a burning red, his body half demon and half man. As he did, he began to release a rapid succession of magic blasts in their direction, blasts that Magnus blocked and redirected with blinding speed and dexterity, as Alec continued guiding him towards the exit.

They were no more than five meters away from their target, when Asmodeus, using both hands, released two separate blasts of deep red demonic energy. One of them hit Magnus directly in the abdomen and he felt on one knee; the other caught Alec in the chest, lifting him a meter off the ground and propelling him backwards. As he fell and hit the ground, Alec felt like every cell in his body was catching fire and that a blast of electricity was burning every nerve ending and knocking the air from his lungs.

Magnus allowed himself the briefest of glances back towards Alec, just enough to ensure that he was still breathing, before turning back to his father. Still on one knee, he brought his hands closer to the ground, tapping on the energy flowing through the soil, allowing it to build and flow within him until he felt like a volcano ready to explode.

"Get up Alexander," Magnus spoke, his voice a command, his eyes still focused on his father who at that moment was circling above their heads, his expression full of satisfaction. The demon could have finished them right there and then, but Magnus knew that his father needed them alive as long as possible. He also knew that it was in his father's nature to extend the agony of his victims, that to him, Alec and Magnus were no more than play things. That was, after all, Asmodeus' most enduring weakness.

Hearing the warlock's voice, and after a moment that felt like an eternity in which he laid on the ground unable to move or breath, Alec called on all the remaining strength left in him and got back on his feet. In a no-so-gracious movement, he stood, his legs shaking and threatening to give out, his breathing even more difficult, a persistent burning covering every inch of him.

"Your arrow Alexander," Magnus instructed once he saw from the corner of his eye that Alec was back on his feet. He then locked eyes with Asmodeus and began to speak the words that three centuries ago his stepfather had made him repeat over and over as he tried to exorcise the demon from the child Magnus had once been. "I banish you, Satan, the inventor and master of all deceit."

Upon hearing the words, the smile froze on Asmodeus' lips and a look of surprise, disbelief and perhaps humor rose to his eyes. "Humble, demon, under the powerful hand of god," Magnus went on as the energy building under his hands reached an all-time high and threatened to overflow. "I invoke the secret and terrible name of god." Magnus stood up, his voice gaining in volume and power.

He half turned and gave Alec a quick glance. Reading the command in Magnus' eyes, Alec lifted above his head the hand that held the arrow, and as one throws a lance, he released it with surprising speed in Asmodeus' direction. In movements that were almost blinding in their velocity and dexterity, Magnus did two things at once. With one hand he sent a stream of red hot magic in the arrow's direction locking its course and directing it towards his father; with his other hand, he sent another torrent of blue and silver magic towards Alec, the blast hitting the Shadowhunter in the chest, propelling him backwards and up towards the red sky, pushing him out of this terrible place.

"By the divine power of god, whose name makes Lucifer's children tremble and coward, I expel you Asmodeus, my father." Magnus finished the incantation at the exact moment in which the arrow penetrated his father's chest. Without turning, he took a single step back and into the circle of silver flames that delineated the pentagram that had just appeared on the ground. The last thing Magnus saw right before the gateway opened and swallowed him was his father's chest exploding, the force of the vanishing spell and of the magic contained in the arrow banishing Asmodeus to an even deeper level of hell.

Alec fell himself pushed backwards with such incredible force that he thought that his chest would cave in and crash his heart and lungs against his back. For a moment, he saw Magnus' diminishing figure as the force of the magic blast propelled him up towards the red sky. But then the ground disappeared and Magnus with it, and only red filled his field of vision, a red that quickly turned pink and then silver as Alec was swallowed up by the void. Soon, Alec no longer felt the push from Magnus' power, and the sensation of weightlessness and vertigo overtook him.

Mastering all his concentration, Alec closed his eyes and pictured the images from the memory Magnus had asked him to call: Magnus sitting in a white sofa, a smile on his lips, a cup of coffee in his hand, black silk pajama bottoms and a silk robe the color of deep red wine, open and showing Magnus' muscular chest and abdomen. He pictured the faint morning light that filtered through the floor-to-ceiling windows that surrounded Magnus' cottage, the sound of rain falling on trees and of the ocean in the distance. And, he pictured himself sitting next to Magnus, placing his own cup on the coffee table, turning to the warlock and kissing him, his hands itching to touch the soft skin on his chest. With all the love he had in him, he recalled the taste and scent of Magnus, the feeling of his soft skin, the quickening of his breathing. Alec recalled those memories as if they were his most precious possession, as if he wanted to carry them into the next world, as if he could forever live in them.

For a moment that felt like an eternity, Alec floated weightless and adrift in a silent void, no longer feeling the pain, just the memory for company. But then the streams of magic that Tessa had cast like a fishing line towards the void that separated the world from the infinite beyond, caught Alec on the back and pulled him with immense force. As Tessa reeled in her powers, Alec felt the strength of a thousand tendrils pulling him, as if he was, in fact, a fish caught on a hook. He then began to plummet towards the ground, unable to stop or break his fall. Suddenly, he jumped, gasped and his lungs filled both with air and with intense and agonizing pain, the pain spreading towards every cell and nerve ending. Startled, he opened his eyes, and for just a moment, Tessa's familiar face came into his frame of vision before oblivion swallowed Alec once again.

 **For a long time, I have wanted to write about what I think hell would look like. I hope I have done a passable job. And, I hope you are as glad as I am that these two have found each other.**


	13. Chapter 13 - Eyes in the Darkness

**Eyes in the Darkness**

"Did you get him out?" Magnus asked as soon as he could see the contours of the room becoming solid between the waning white and silver flames that surrounded the pentagram. His expression mirrored the anguish and urgency of his voice, and his chest rose and fell in quick movements denoting his state of agitation and exhaustion. As soon as the last of the flames disappeared and he no longer felt the forces that had held him within the pentagram, Magnus attempted to take a step. But his legs refused to obey him, and he felt on one knee, his body drained beyond exhaustion. Somehow, Magnus managed to stop himself before totally collapsing to the floor, yet his head still swam, and he could see sparkles in the periphery of his vision, sparkles that he was sure were not the result of the vanishing gateway to hell. He turned and looked up towards where Tessa stood beside Alec's inert figure and saw the mixture of concentration and anxiety clearly written in his friend's strained expression.

Tessa was sending measured and steady short bursts of purple and green magic directly into Alec's heart, coaxing it to beat, careful not to lose control for fear that, instead of restarting it, she might cause the organ to explode. As soon as Catarina saw that Magnus was safely back, she too went to the sofa and placed a hand on Alec's forehead, sending gentle streams of magic to soothe pain and entice his lungs to open up and breath.

"Come on, Alec," Tessa urged. "Come on now, don't give up, you have come this far, just a little more." She closed her eyes and pictured in her mind the faces of so many of the Lightwoods she had known and loved over the years: Gabriel who married Will's sister, Gideon and Sophie, and their children and grandchildren, who had rebuilt the Lightwood's good name, ancestors of this young man whose life was now in her hands. "Come Alec, breath," she added as she called on the spirits of those Lightwoods to give Alec's soul the strength to fight his way out of the void. As she sent bursts of magic into the Shadowhunter, she also pulled with all her strength the lines of magic she had sent across the veil and with which she had captured Alec's soul, reeling in it towards the living world and back into his body.

Abruptly, Alec took a deep ragged breath, his back arching and then falling back on the sofa. His eyes flew open, for just a moment, before they closed once again, and he sank back into unconscious. Anxiously, Tessa looked at Catarina, whose hand was still resting on Alec's forehead and Catarina gazed back and nodded.

"He is breathing, and his heart is beating, which is a lot to say under the circumstances," Catarina confirmed. "But he is weak, and if his condition doesn't stabilize he may need mundane medicine: adrenaline, oxygen and a heart monitor at the very least. He may even need a Silent Brother."

"Alexander," came Magnus' faint voice from the foot of the sofa. Mastering all his strength, he had managed to get back on his feet and had been anxiously watching his friends' attempts to save the Shadowhunter, sorrier than ever for not having taken a more serious interest in healing magic before. As soon as Catarina confirmed that Alec was, at least for now, breathing, he came to kneel beside him, took his hand and brought it to his own cheek, anxious for the contact. Alec's skin felt cold and clammy against his own skin, but that didn't matter if it meant that life was again coursing through Alec's system. "We will get him to a hospital if we must, or we can get Jem here," Magnus said looking at Catarina. He was not sure how they would explain Alec's injuries to a mundane doctor or to a Silent Brother, but that didn't matter now. He would find a way.

"That took you long enough Magnus." Catarina's acerbic voice reminded Magnus that his friend's bedside manners, as usual, didn't not extend to him. "Did you decide to stop for margaritas on the way? Any longer and we would not have been able to get you out."

"We almost didn't make it," Magnus replied. "My father was quite insistent that we should remain. But we did make it, didn't we?" he added turning to Alec as if the Shadowhunter could answer or agree.

"We are not out of the woods yet," Tessa stated, "not by a long shot. Alec's condition is very delicate, and he still has a lot of fighting to do. And, Magnus, you need to call Jace right now, or there will be a serious incident between the Nephilim and the Spiral Labyrinth. Jem has been sending ever more urgent fire messages since the sun came out."

"Okay, but first, can we move Alec to the bedroom?" Magnus asked, standing up on shaky legs. "He would be more comfortable there."

"Right now, you cannot make a leaf move in the wind, Magnus," Catarina replied. "Your powers are completely spent, and Alec is too weak to be moved. Let's give it some time."

It was dark, or rather hazy, and Alec was lost in the freezing fog. "What happened? Where am I?" he asked as he tried to get his bearings, but the fog was so thick that he could not even see his own hands in front of him. He tried to look down at his chest, to ascertain why he felt such sharp pain there, but when he tried to move his head, a pain even more intense ceased him, a pain that burned and froze him at the same time. He gasped, but no air came into his lungs, only a burning and freezing pain that made him choke and taste blood. "I am dying," he thought as the darkness swallowed him, and the realization did not frighten him. For a Shadowhunter, death was, after all, a constant figure in the horizon, and at this moment, Alec would welcome death if it took the pain away.

Alec did not know how long he floated weightless and adrift in the darkness, but a few minutes. or perhaps a few centuries later, he thought he heard faint voices calling to him. He could not make up what they were saying or whose voices they were. He tried to hold on to the sound, walk towards its origin, but he could not move and soon, he was falling, heavy like a rock, unable to stop or help himself. When he thought he would hit the ground, he hit water instead and the water began to cover him and pull him under. He struggled for breath, but his lungs refused to obey, and he went down, only one thought in his mind: "this is what dying is like."

But Alec did not die, instead, a pair of golden and green eyes, the eyes of cat, their slit pupils penetrating, looked at him across the dark waters, and he felt himself being pulled up by the power of those eyes. "Alexander," someone called to him, the voice so familiar and sweet, a voice that made Alec think of nights in the warm shelter of a pair of strong arms. He followed the voice and the eyes up to the surface and when he broke through, he gasped, and the pain was back in all its intensity, spreading with relentless cruelty to every inch of him. He wanted to call for Magnus, the owner of those haunting eyes, but the name froze on his lips, the pain making it impossible for Alec to hold on to the name long enough.

"I need to heal the fractured ribs, or he won't be able to breath," another voiced said, and Alec could not tell whose voice it was or the significance of what the voice said. He could no longer see the eyes that had beckoned him and, disoriented once again, he let go of his feeble hold on reality.

Alec could not tell how long he was lost this time, but at some point, he felt the touch of hands on his leg, and then the pain, no longer burning or freezing, but cutting him with a thousand knives, cutting him in half, and then shredding his skin until there was nothing left of him. This time, he let go voluntarily, wanting with all his heart to be swallowed up by the emptiness, glad not to feel the pain anymore. "Open your eyes Alexander," someone said and although the voice was pleasantly familiar and loving, Alec did not reach for it.

"He is still too weak, and the runes Tessa drew don't seem to be enough," Catarina stated from the foot of the bed looking at Alec with an expression of concern and puzzlement. She thought that something was odd, not wrong necessarily, just odd, but she could not put her finger on it. It was something in the energy that surrounded Alec, the distinct energy she had learned to recognize in the souls that came under her care and that allowed her to distinguish between Nephilim, Mundanes and Downworlders. Something about Alec's soul was not yet completely back to normal, or perhaps it had been fundamentally changed by his ordeal. If she had to describe its condition, she would say that Alec's soul seemed to have carried a piece of the Seventh Circle as it crossed the veil, and something about it reminded her of the way Tessa's soul felt like.

"What is it?" Tessa, who was standing beside her, asked. Tessa looked at her friend with unease. Catarina was a great healer, perhaps the best, and Tessa had learned to trust her friend's instincts, and the puzzled look in her eyes told her that something was not as it should be.

"I am not sure," Catarina replied, not wanting to read too much into a situation that was already unpredictable enough.

After twenty-four hours that were touch and go and using a combination of magic and physical force, they had finally moved Alec upstairs to the bedroom. He now laid on Magnus' enormous bed, and the morning light that shyly shone through the windows and the white sheets that covered him made his skin look almost translucent and accentuated the dark bags under Alec's eyes. Magnus sat on the edge of the bed beside Alec and held his hand in a position that had become a permanent feature of the scene since the two of them returned from the Seventh Circle. Catarina could tell that despite the food that she had almost forced Magnus to eat, he was still exhausted; the fact that he refused to lay down and sleep was not helping either.

A noise on the window irrupted on her reverie and when she looked, she saw yet another paper bird tapping on the glass, another fire message demanding their attention, telling them that they could not continue pretending that it was just the four of them in the world anymore.

"You need to answer Magnus," Catarina said, as she walked to the window and opened it to allow the fire message to reach its destination. "Celestina Rays will not give up, you know that."

"I know," said Magnus with a sigh, opening his hand for the message to land on his palm. "I guess we cannot delay this any longer. I will arrange for Jace to portal to a place where I can meet him and bring him here. He is anxious to see Alec and we will need his help" he added standing up. With resignation, he looked at Alec's unconscious figure one last time before walking out of the room.

"Hey Alec, buddy," a voice called to Alec, familiar and safe, the voice of someone Alec knew as well as he knew himself. Still, it took him a moment to identify the voice as belonging to Jace, but when he did, a sensation of warmth took residence in the spot atop his hip where his parabatai rune was located, the sensation soothing the pain a little, inviting him back into the waking world. He wanted to follow the voice, hear its summon and open his eyes, but his eyelids felt like they were made of concrete and refused to obey him. So instead, he surrendered to the sensation of comfort and warmth Jace's voice provoked in him knowing that his brother would not begrudge him if he took a little longer to reply.

"I know it doesn't look like it, but he is doing better," Magnus' voice came after, and Alec, who had begun to surrender to unconscious once again wanted to turn and stay. He tried with a superhuman effort to open his eyes, to look at Magnus and ease his anxiety with a smile, but no matter how much he tried, he had already lost the battle.

For five days, Alec drifted in between worlds, lost and aimless. A few times, Magnus' voice beckoned him to come back, reaching him through the dark distance with sweet and loving words; at other times, it was the memory of those cat eyes shining in the darkness that enticed him to return; a couple of times, the pull came from the strength of the angelic runes someone drew on his skin. But every time he was about to break through the barrier that separated oblivion from reality, the pain seized him with all its force and he let go, choosing nothingness over the agony of being in a body that felt like it was being taken apart and put back together again. In more than one occasion Alec was tempted to let go for good, but then the image, clear and unforgettable, of Magnus stepping between him and Asmodeus made him reconsider and he stayed in that in-between place, biding his time until he could build the strength to push himself back into the world.

On the morning of the sixth day, Alec finally stepped over the threshold, and the first thing of which he became aware was the soft white light that reached his pupils through his still closed eyelids and the singing of birds in the distance. He then realized that he was no longer floating in the emptiness, that, in fact, he occupied physical space, had weight and substance. He knew this because his hands touched soft sheets and he could perceive the weight of his body against the mattress and the air touching his skin. He laid with eyes closed for a while longer, unsure whether he could open them, and when he decided to try, his eyelids were heavy and disobedient. When he finally gained control over them, he could see no more than blurry shadows.

And then, just like that, he was back. Or rather, his body was back; it came back to him all at once and the pain was excruciating. It was in his chest, his head, his side, every inch of his skin, and having already let go of oblivion, he could not avoid it or escape it. Alec reached out with his hand, and someone took it and held it, and with the sensation of another's touch, a face came into his frame of vision, gentle green eyes, and a round face framed by reddish-brown curls.

"Hey, there you are, welcome back," Tessa said, a broad smile on her lovely face. She then brought a cup to Alec's lip and helping him lift his head, which seemed to have become a boulder, enticed him to drink. The liquid was sweet and had a faint floral scent and as it run down his throat, it took with it the sandpaper that seemed to have taken residence there. As soon as it reached his stomach, the drink dulled the pain and cleared his head somewhat, and he felt a surge of strength spreading through him.

"Ma-Magnus," Alec managed to say once he convinced his throat to work, and his voice sounded foreign and hoarse after days of disuse. In fact, it felt as if his throat, his mouth and his voice were not his own, and he had to learn to use them again.

"Magnus is perfectly fine," Tessa replied. "He is not here right now but should be back soon. How do you feel?"

"Like…" he started to say but then had to catch his breath. "Like I was run through… a paper shredder." The last part of the statement came accompanied by a laborious exhalation.

"That is a fair assessment," Tessa said, her smile widening.

As the potion cleared his mind even more, Alec became aware of a sensation that was a mixture of vibration and heat on his arm and when he slowly turned his head, he noticed a fresh rune there. He observed the rune with a certain detachment as if it was not on his body on which it was edged, or rather, as if his body was not his own. He had the eerie sensation that his body was like a new suit to which buttons, zippers and seams he had to get used. 'This is what having your soul ripped from your body and then push back into it must feel like,' he thought.

"Jace drew that healing rune as well as a strength rune on your other arm," Tessa informed him. "I have been redrawing them every few hours to rebuild your strength."

"Jace was here?"

"Yes, he came to see you and to get Magnus and Catarina," Tessa replied.

"Can you help me sit up?" Alec felt his mind fading again, and his eyes were threatening to close against his will. He didn't want to fall asleep yet, at least not until he found out what was going on and why Magnus was not here. "Where is Magnus?" he asked as Tessa placed another pillow under his head and helped him to a semi-sitting position.

"You gave us quite a scare," Tessa said dodging the question. She helped Alec drink some more of the potion. "Even with the combination of angelic runes and magic, your recovery has been slow."

"Tessa," Alec insisted, bringing the full weight of his stare on the warlock, and feeling the reviving effects of the medicine. "What happened, where is Magnus?"

Tessa sighed loudly and then reached for an envelope that rested on the night table. "He left this for you in case you woke up before he came back. While you look at it, I will go prepare some more medicine. I will be back soon."

Alec took the envelope and for a moment looked at his name written in Magnus' ornate script, a script that made Alec think of Victorian love letters. With shaking hands, he turned the envelope and saw a wax seal with an M imprinted on it and smiled, likely his first smile in weeks, for that too was another proof of Magnus' love for old fashions. But the smile faded when he tried to break the seal and it refused to budge. He looked at it again, and suddenly, words that had been invisible slowly appeared on the envelope: " _only true love's kiss."_ As he brought the seal to his lips, Alec thought that if his side didn't hurt so much, he would laugh. For Alec, who had never read any of the mundane fairy tales, the words evoked other memories, memories full of sensuality, memories of a rainy night of laughs and playful embraces, of warm touches and daring invitations.

At the touch of his lips, the seal gave way and the envelope opened, and when Alec took out the sheet of paper inside, an old brass key fell on his hand, big and with an intricate swirly design in its bow.

" _Dear Alexander,"_ the note read in Magnus' neat script.

" _I am sorry I was not there when you finally woke up. It couldn't be helped. Our last misadventure has called the attention of the Spiral Labyrinth and, through them, of The Clave. Jace, Catarina and I are going to the Spiral Labyrinth to sort things out before we have a full-blown crisis in our hands. I know you would have wanted to come along, but there is still something very important you can do for me, or rather for us. This key is enchanted to work only for you. It opens all doors in the cottage and in my penthouse, including and most importantly, the safe in my office. There is a black book there, a book containing many secrets, secrets that some warlocks would pay dearly to keep hidden. I am planning to use those secrets as collateral to get Celestina Rays and the Spiral Labyrinth off our backs. I am entrusting you with the book. Should something happen, do with it as you see fit._

 _I will be back as soon as I can. Until then, I know you will keep getting stronger; for you are, after all, the bravest and toughest Nephilim, the toughest man, I have ever known._

 _Magnus"_

For a moment, Alec looked from the key to the note, trying to clear the cobwebs that still clouded his mind long enough to make sense of their significance. But soon, the ominous tone that underlined Magnus' words –"Should something happen" – won over all other speculations.

Mastering all the strength that he had left in him, Alec turned and began to swing his legs out of bed, determined to get up, unsure yet what he would do, but completely convinced that he had to do something.

"Where do you think you are going?" Tessa's words came from the doorway, urgent and full surprise. She was coming back into the room with a tray containing what Alec suspected were more potions and medicines for him.

"I have to get in touch with Celestina Rays." Alec's head was spinning, and he could see bright lights in the periphery of his vision, but he was more determined than ever to get back on his feet. "Help me get up, Tessa, please."

"You are still too weak Alec," Tessa retorted. "Only a few minutes ago you were still unconscious. Besides, there are no means of communications between this cottage and the outside world, except for fire messages. Jace couldn't even portal directly here. Magnus had to go pick him up several kilometers away."

"Magnus has a way, I know it. He left me the key to his desk, there is communication equipment there." The first time he and Magnus were in the cottage, he had seen the laptop and the big flat screen hidden behind an enormous painting on the wall in Magnus' office. Magnus had told him that he had devised a spell that allowed the laptop to undetectably connect to the outside world, but that it was meant to be used only in emergencies. Alec suspected the present situation qualified as an emergency. "How long ago did they leave?" he now asked Tessa, his voice full of determination despite the fact that it still sounded a little feeble. "How long Tessa?" He repeated the question when Tessa failed to reply.

"They left yesterday," she finally said with a loud sigh.

"And you have not heard from any of them, have you?"

"No, but that doesn't mean anything. Time has a different meaning for warlocks, especially those in the Spiral Labyrinth" Tessa argued, wanting to ease Alec's mind. "It could be that they are just taking their time sorting things out."

"Magnus would have been in touch," Alec replied, "even if just to check on us."

Tessa had to agree; Magnus had been reluctant to leave to begin with and had agreed to go only after Tessa had assured him that she would look after Alec. Still, he had told her that he would be checking in every couple of hours.

After the incident with Aldous Nix's spell book, and when she failed to get any of the New York warlocks to surrender Catarina and Magnus, Celestina Rays had gone directly to the New York Institute and had accused Magnus, Catarina and Alec of stealing a precious book from the Labyrinth's archives. She had obviously failed to report that the book belonged to Aldous and that it contained information about the ancient warlock's research and demonic activities.

Jace had done all in his power to appease Celestina, but it had been to no avail. By the time Magnus had finally gotten in touch with Jace, Celestina was threatening a full-blown diplomatic incident with The Clave. Magnus had had to agree to a meeting; he had no other choice. Jace had insisted on coming along, arguing with Celestina that Alec was away on an important mission and that he, Jace, as acting Head of the Institute, was the highest-ranking Clave representative in New York. Prior to the meeting, Jace had portalled to a location about a hundred kilometers away, and Magnus, using his portal key – the only way in and out of the cottage – had gone to fetch him so he could come see Alec.

"Magnus, what did you do to my parabatai?" Jace had asked when he saw Alec lying unconscious on the bed, half healing burns covering his skin, and bandages wrapped around his torso and foot. "I have been out of mind with worry. In more than one occasion I was sure he was dead or dying."

"We were on a demon hunt," had been Magnus' curt reply, not wanting to reveal more information than what Alec might consider appropriate for Jace to know.

"What happened? Wait don't tell me. It is better than I don't know if I am going to help you sort out the mess with that irritating and arrogant warlock," Jace had stated and Tessa had had to smile. For Celestina must have given Jace a run for his money if he was calling her arrogant.

Jace, Magnus and Catarina had left twenty-four hours ago. Since them, not even a fire message indicating that they had arrived at the Labyrinth had come, nothing, no news and no word, and no matter what she now told Alec, Tessa was growing increasingly worried.

"Get me my stele," Alec asked Tessa once his feet were on the ground and he was sitting on the edge of the bed. He felt dizzy and more than a little nauseous, but he was fully awake and planned to remain so for as long as necessary. Remembering his training, he forced his lungs to breath slowly and steadily through the pain that threatened to overcome him.

Fifteen minutes, two potions, and two stamina and two pain relieving runes later, Alec was in Magnus' office, leaning against Magnus' desk, and looking at the surprised faces of the warlocks that sat around a table at the other side of the computer screen. He could see Magnus, Jace and Catarina there, but he resisted the temptation to acknowledge their presence or to look at Magnus. Instead, he put on his best Institute Head's expression and looked straight at the woman at the head of the table. He had never met Celestina Rays in person, but he had seen pictures of the serious bleach blond woman with the pixie haircut and the glasses that Alec was sure she did not need, but that she wore nonetheless, likely to inspire respect for her authority.

"What a surprise Mr. Lightwood," Celestina said by way of greeting. "I was under the impression that you were indisposed."

"Not indisposed," Alec replied, his voice steady and authoritative, "but rather busy. Catarina and Magnus were helping the New York Institute on a secret mission of great importance when you summoned them. I expect that you have a powerful reason for interfering with my mission." Casually and assuming the demeanor of a cat playing with a mouse, Alec turned a page on Magnus' black book, which he had retrieved from the safe and now held in his hands, strategically positioned for Celestina to see. After pretending to read a few sentences, he looked up at Celestina. "When can I expect them back Ms. Rays?"

"We are pursuing an investigation of our own Mr. Lightwood. We have received reports of unusual demonic activity in New York."

"Demonic activity?" Alec replied feigning surprise. "And since when does the Spiral Labyrinth investigate demonic activities? I thought that was our job."

"Our reports indicate that warlocks were involved in these demonic activities, and that some of those warlocks took a precious book from our archives likely in order to pursue said activities."

"Failing to report Downworlder involvement in demonic activity is a serious bridge of The Accords, Ms. Rays. I assume you reported this and any other such incident to us." As he turned another page in Magnus' book, Alec thought that if he was not in so much pain he would be enjoying this conversation. He looked back at Calestina Rays and thought for a moment that the women had the expression of a fish that had found itself suddenly out of the water. She was trying hard to remain cool, but Alec suspected that she was terrified of what Alec might be reading in the book.

"Of course, we abide by The Accords," replied Celestine finally finding her voice, her face a study in outrage. "That is why we requested to meet with Mr. Herondale."

"And what, may I ask, do you think Magnus and Catarina have to do with the loss of your precious book? I hope you are not accusing the High Warlock of Brooklyn or the New York Institute of theft. That would be a serious accusation," Alec added, his voice measured and his eyes steady. "Let me assure you, Ms. Rays, that Magnus, Catarina and I have been on a very important demon hunt for the last several weeks. I do not know of the book of which you speak. I know of other books, however, books that contain many secrets, secrets that many might want to keep hidden."

Alec thought he saw a small twitch alter Celestina Rays' impassive expression, but she quickly regained control of her features, plastering a pleasant smile on her face. Some of the other warlocks sitting around the table were less adept at deception, however, and more than a few shifted uncomfortably in the seats. Alec resisted the urge to smile or gloat, for he knew that, like the cat that finally gets the mouse, he had Celestina and her warlocks exactly where he wanted them.

"I am making no accusations, Mr. Lightwood. We are just investigating."

"Well, in that case," Alec said, his expression a study in indifference, "and since I do have a very important and potentially destructive demon to catch, I expect Magnus and Catarina to return to their duties presently. The Clave does, after all, pay the Spiral Labyrinth a handsome commission every time we secure the services of a warlock. You do not want to delay the fulfillment of our mission or damage our business relationship, do you?" He turned another page of the black book for good measure and to finally bring the point home.

"Of course," Celestina Rays replied, her tone equally deliberate. "We do not want to interfere with such an important collaboration between the warlock community and the Shadowhunters."

"I hope you find your lost book soon, Ms. Rays," Alec stated in a tone that conveyed that the conversation was over. "Now I must return to my duties, demons do not hunt themselves after all."

As soon as he cut off the call and the screen went black, Alec leaned forward, rested his hands on his knees, and took a few rapid and ragged breaths, the pain and exhaustion finally winning over his determination to remain on his feet. His body began to shake uncontrollably and a thin sheen of sweat covered his brow and back. "I think I need to go back to bed now, Tessa," he said, his voice strained. "Can you help me?"

Tessa, who had remained standing by the doorway and out of sight of Celestina. walked forward and put her arm around Alec's waist supporting him before he collapsed to the ground. They then slowly made their way back upstairs and to Magnus' bed. As soon as his head hit the pillow, Alec closed his eyes, and the last thing in his mind as he fell into a deep slumber was the image of Magnus' looking at him from the other side of the screen, a faint and proud smile rising to his slips.

Hours later, Alec opened his eyes when he felt the touch of a soft hand against his cheek. The room was in shadows and he suspected that it was night, but even in the darkness he could clearly see the cat eyes that were looking at him with a tender expression. "Magnus?" he asked.

"I am here," Magnus replied, his voice tender. "As I have said many times before, Alexander, you never cease to amaze me. I knew you would come through for us. Now go back to sleep. I will see you in the morning."

Alec closed his eyes once again, exhaustion winning over his desire to speak with Magnus, and as sleep reclaimed him, he breathed in deeply, feeling more peaceful than he had felt in weeks.

 **Tying lose ends as I approach the end. I appreciate any comments you may have, even if to let me know that I am not writing just for myself.**


	14. Chapter 14 - Eight-Point Star

**Eight Point Star**

Alec thought he should be healed and back to normal by now. He was, after all, a Shadowhunter with superior physical strengths and with access to healing and strengthening runes. Furthermore, he did not remember ever having received so much magic or potions before in his life. He could not understand why he was not bouncing back as fast as he was used to; why he was still so tired and weak that even a trip down the stairs left him breathless; and why he still felt like someone had just hit him with a sledgehammer squarely on the chest. The Nephilim were not generally afflicted by illness and, thus, were not particularly good patients. They certainly failed miserably in the patience test. When Shadowhunters fell ill, it was usually in old age. If they were injured, which was quite a common occurrence, they either died or rapidly mended. As a result, the general expectation was that if a Shadowhunter did not die, they should get up from their hospital bed and go immediately back to their duties. Anything less was considered a sign of weakness.

"Shouldn't I be back to full strength by now?" Alec asked, as Catarina examined him and sent jet another stream of magic towards his ankle, meant to strengthen the bone and ease his pain. "I mean it's been over a week."

"We have no roadmap for the injuries you suffered, Alec," replied Tessa who at that moment was setting a tray with yet more potions on the coffee table. "As far as we know, no other Nephilim has ever gone through what you have gone through. Your body just needs time to recover. Your skin, at least, has healed nicely; you will have no visible scars from the burns," she added examining Alec's arm which just days ago had been covered in horrible blisters.

"But that is the thing," Alec argued. "It was not really my body that went to the Seven Circle. My body was here all along."

"The soul has no other way to manifest injuries, except for the body to which it is joined," Catarina responded. "Your body suffered, broke and burned in response to what your soul was enduring. It is only natural that your body will also be the conduit for healing your soul."

Upon knowing that Magnus was safely back, Alec had had a fairly decent night sleep, and, in the morning, he had even felt strong enough to get himself out of bed and downstairs to the living room. He had woken up slowly and to the faint sound of water running in the bathroom. Still half asleep, he had reached for the side of the bed where Magnus usually slept. But he had found it empty and cold, and when he finally opened his eyes and looked, he saw that the bed covers were not disturbed there. Magnus had slept somewhere else and had only come into the room in the morning to shower.

Alec had laid quietly for a few minutes listening to the sound of water while he looked up at the ceiling. After a few moments, he had remembered the remote control that had rested on the night table the last time he and Magnus spent the night in this room, and had reached for it, pressing the button to open the mechanic blinds on the skylight. The reward for the effort had been that he could see blue sky peeking through cottony clouds and between the tree tops that surrounded the cottage. The view was as beautiful and peaceful as he remembered, the occasional birdsong the only noise. That, and the sound of the shower in the bathroom where Alec imagined the water running through Magnus' hair and caressing Magnus' golden skin.

As he turned and slowly and carefully swung his legs out of bed, his body complaining with every movement and twist, he had thought that his health was not the only thing that needed improvement, that his and Magnus' relationship also needed considerable mending. Wanting to give Magnus privacy, and knowing that neither of them was yet ready to go back to things the way they were before, he had gotten up, put on jeans and a button-down shirt someone had left for him at the foot of the bed and slowly headed downstairs.

He had felt much better and his legs had seemed quite capable to sustaining his weight. Yet, by the time he had made it to the living room, he was breathing shallowly and was so dizzy that he had to sit down and catch his breath. Tessa and Catarina, who at that moment had been sitting at the kitchen counter, cups of coffee in their hands, had turned and looked at him with a mixture of surprise and relief. They had then quickly, and despite his protestations, jumped into healing and nursing mode.

Keeping her hand a couple of inches above his body, Catarina now sent gentle streams of magic towards Alec, starting near his injured ankle and slowly moving up his leg and towards his chest, diagnosing and healing as she went along. The magic gave Alec a tingling sensation that was both soothing and strengthening. When she reached Alec's chest, she stopped at a spot over his sternum, just a couple of inches from his heart, and a look of puzzlement, curiosity and concern came to her face. She lifted the hand that was not performing magic to her mouth in a gesture of deep contemplation. After a second, and as if she was testing a theory, she rested the hand performing magic on Alec's sternum.

The contact made Alec jump as if he had received an electric shock, and his chest suddenly swelled as if filling with what Alec could only describe as energy, the sensation tingling the inside of his chest cavity. For a second, he thought he saw multicolor threads of energy swirling around the room and reaching for the spot on his chest where Catarina's hand rested.

"What was that?" Alec asked startled. He then saw a look he could not quite identify pass between Catarina and Tessa. "What is it?" he asked even more urgently.

"Can I take a look at your chest Alec?" Catarina asked, uncertainty and anxiety joining curiosity on her face.

Alec unbuttoned his shirt exposing his chest and then looked down at the spot on his sternum where Catarina's hand had rested a moment ago. That was the spot where Alec had received the blow from the magic energy Magnus had used to propel him out of hell, and the blast had originally left an angry and excruciatingly painful burn. The burn had healed but the spot was still sore. Now as he looked down, he saw that the burn had left a scar, a rather odd scar that did not look red as it was expected of burns. Rather, this scar was silver, almost luminescent, and looked awfully like a star, a star that instead of five points, had eight. As he looked at the scar, it began to fade, as if sinking into the skin.

Alec had not noticed the scar when he got dressed this morning and having been unconscious for most of the last few days, had no idea whether it had been there before. However, something told him that neither Tessa, nor Catarina, had seen or noticed it until now.

"Can you sit up, so I can see your back?" Catarina asked, her voice measured and nurse-like.

Alec did as he was told, and he didn't need to see for himself to know that his back exhibited a similar scar. This time, Catarina rested her hand against a spot between Alec's shoulder blades, and the tingling sensation returned at the same time that the scar on his chest, and apparently also the one on his back, glowed once again before beginning to fade until they almost disappeared. Tessa and Catarina's expression of puzzlement that quickly turned into shock or perhaps fear told him that what was happening was not something they had ever seen before.

"That is where I grabbed Alec's soul with my magic to pull him across the veil," Tessa quietly commented, pointing to the spot between Alec's shoulder blades.

"It may just be scar tissue," Catarina speculated. "It could be that there are still remnants of energy from the Seventh Circle lingering between skin and muscle." For some reason, however, Alec did not think that Catarina truly believed her own explanation.

"What kind of spell were you just trying out Catarina?" Magnus' unmistakable voice came from the second floor, followed by the sound of his steps on the stairs. "Are you trying to bring down the wards? It won't work, you know. My wards are notoriously unbreakable."

Alec quickly pulled his shirt down and began to do the buttons, sending a clear signal to the two women that he did not want Magnus to know about the scars, at least not for now.

"Good morning Magnus, how did you sleep?" has asked turning to the stairway as Magnus reached the last step.

Despite the dark shadows under his eyes, evidence of his lingering exhaustion, the warlock looked considerably more like himself this morning. His jet-black hair stylishly stuck out in all directions and reflected the morning light coming in through the window. His two-day stubble was perfectly sculpted and trimmed, and the dark red shirt and black jeans he wore hugged his body perfectly. The hairdo, the stubble and the clothes, along with the jewelry and the makeup he wore around his eyes, made Magnus look surprisingly manly without appearing ultra-masculine, as if in Magnus all those things found perfect harmony. Alec thought, not for the first time, that Magnus was probably one of the most stylish men he knew, not that he knew much about style himself. It was perhaps that Magnus was completely comfortable in his skin, in a way he, Alec, wished one day also to feel.

"I slept quite well, thank you," Magnus replied, his tone towards Alec overly polite. "How are you feeling Alexander?"

"Stronger, but my two doctors here think that I still have some ways to go," Alec said sitting up. He then looked from Catarina to Tessa and saw that they had both managed to conceal the look of concern from a moment ago.

"I would listen to them," Magnus stated with a bright smile as he sat on the arm of the sofa, very close but not touching Alec. "You do not want to know what Catarina does to her patients when they do not follow her instructions. So," he added turning to Catarina, "what kind of ancient spell were you trying to perform just now? Was it elemental magic that I felt? You almost blew up the lightbulbs in the bathroom, you know."

"I don't know what you are talking about Magnus," Catarina said in the tone she usually used when speaking to her oldest friend in the world. "For the look of your hair, I would say that it was the inordinate amount of hair spray your used that caused the lights to flicker."

Alec pretended to be engrossed in the banter but from the corner of his eyes, he looked at Tessa and saw the pensive expression in her face. Something about the scars on his body had unsettled her, or perhaps it was that she knew what the scars meant. Perhaps, the news was not good, and he was not really getting better. Perhaps he was even getting worse; perhaps his time in hell had wounded him in ways that could not be healed. That would explain why he was not getting stronger. Perhaps he was not really out of the woods yet.

"Alexander," Magnus' voice interrupted his gloomy thoughts. "I asked if you were hungry. Do you feel up to eating a good breakfast?"

"Yes, I think I could eat a little," he replied turning to Magnus, the warlock's smile momentarily making him forget his concerns. As usual, Magnus' smile had a magnetic pull on Alec, especially when his eyes also smiled and gleamed the way they did this morning, and he could not help but corresponding that smile. For a moment, Alec thought that Magnus would reach with his hand and touch him the way he had done so many times before. He even thought that he saw Magnus' hand move a little in his direction, and his heart skipped a beat and his skin tingled in anticipation. But either Alec imagined it, or Magnus halted the gesture. For instead, Magnus stood up and headed for the kitchen, announcing that he would make his famous French toast.

"When are you going to finally admit that you stole that recipe from Julia Child, Magnus?" Catarina said, keeping up with Magnus' good humor.

"I taught Julia the recipe," Magnus retorted, a feigned tone of outrage in his voice. "It was she who failed to give me credit for it."

They ate at the kitchen counter and in good humored companionship, and Alec even managed to finish half of his food and have a whole cup of coffee before he was too tired to keep eating and had to return to the sofa for a rest. All through the meal, the three warlocks kept a lively conversation, a conversation that covered all kinds of topics except for the events of the last few weeks. They were not ready to speak about what had happened yet; it was still too fresh in their minds, and Alec suspected that they were also being considerate towards him because they thought he was not yet strong enough for difficult conversations.

Magnus and Alec kept surreptitiously looking in each other's direction, and every time their eyes met, they smiled, and Alec was sure that he, at least, blushed in more than one occasion. The energy between them was palpable, it was like a magnetic field building, expanding and contracting between them. The sensation made the butterflies in Alec's stomach flutter, and his heart swell with a love he wished he could profess for all to hear. It was as if they were back to those first days of their acquaintance when they were not yet certain where they stood with one another, when the attraction that they felt for each other was like a force that they could not resist even if they didn't know what to do about it. Alec wished he could reach and rest his hand against Magnus' cheek or run his fingers through Magnus' hair, but he didn't because there were things to say and this was not the time to say them.

Magnus, on his part, felt like a swarm of birds had suddenly come awake in his chest, and they got even more rowdy every time Alec turned those deep brown eyes on him. His fingers itched to touch the Shadowhunter, run through his skin making sure he was really okay. His arms wanted to wrap themselves around Alec ascertaining that, in fact, he was solid and present and not just an invention of Magnus' imagination. Like he had felt during the first few weeks after he had met Alec, when they were just friends who hanged out and shared drinks, Magnus felt nervous and his heart was in suspense, and he thought he would explode if he didn't release some of the energy building within him. He was happy beyond belief that Alec was alive, and he wanted with all his heart to hold him in his arms, to kiss him, to run his hands up and down his back, but something made him feel unaccountably shy.

For the next few days, Alec continued getting stronger, not as fast as he expected, but stronger nonetheless. Neither Catarina nor Tessa mentioned again the scars on Alec's chest and back, and not wanting to worry Magnus, Alec did not say anything either. He did examine the spot on his chest though and noticed that, while most of the time, the scar was barely visible, a few times at least, it seemed to glow with more intensity. The scars were odd in their shape, colour and symmetry. They looked as if a spear had pierced his chest from front to back, leaving a trace of metal as it passed through, metal that sometimes sparkled eerily both on his chest and back.

Alec and Magnus remained polite, attentive and solicitous towards one another. But they kept their distance even if the distance was small. Neither of them reached for the other, and neither did they bring up the issues that had caused their argument, or the experiences each of them had endured during their time in hell. Yet, they talked easily with one another, without awkward silences, or uncomfortable topics.

Alec came downstairs every morning and sometimes sat out in the terrace with Tessa or Magnus, and they discussed books, history, movies, music or favorite restaurants. Tessa, Magnus and Catarina also diverted Alec with stories of their many adventures and of the people they had met over the centuries of their lives. Sometimes, they just sat quietly, listening to music, readings, or simply lost in their own thoughts.

When Alec got tired, which was quite often, he napped on the sofa and woke up with Magnus sitting beside him, a book or an ancient manuscript in his hand, quietly reading or working, while keeping watch over him. Every time he needed to take potions, Catarina or Tessa prepared them, but Magnus was the one to administer them to him. Magnus also always stood nearby when Tessa or Catarina performed healing or strengthening spells on Alec and he constantly asked him if he felt better or needed anything. Furthermore, Magnus made sure that Alec ate and brought him coffee or a snack every time he thought too many hours had passed since Alec's last meal. Yet at night, Alec went to bed alone in Magnus' bed. Magnus sometimes accompanied him upstairs if he thought Alec was too tired and might stumble, but then he came to sleep on the sofa.

During those nights, Alec laid awake for a long while, looking up at the dark sky through the skylight, which blinds he kept permanently open, and imagined Magnus downstairs, lying on the white couch. He pictured his face that looked even more youthful when he slept, the way his hair fell across his forehead and his eyes fluttered when he dreamt. But he did not come downstairs, neither did he ask Magnus to come to bed with him. They were not ready yet; Alec knew that there were things that needed saying before they could put this terrible episode behind them and hopefully move forward.

In the same way that Alec laid awake thinking of Magnus, Magnus spent hours pacing back and forth his living room, wishing with all his heart that he could run up the stairs, walk into the bedroom and claim a place in Alec's life once again. He longed, like he had not done in a long time, for the taste and feel of Alec's lips, for the sensation of Alec's touch, and the incredible thrill of coming undone in Alec's arms and having Alec come undone in his. But, for one, Alec was not yet completely recovered, and there were things that still needed to be sorted between them.

Neither of them doubted the strength of the feelings they each had for the other. The events of the last few weeks had proven their might. They were just not certain whether those feelings would be strong enough to build a life on. Magnus did not know whether Alec had overcome his struggled with Magnus' immortality and the memories he carried from his past lives, and Alec did not know whether Magnus had forgiven him for the stupid mistake that had brought them to such a terrible impasse. So, they resigned themselves to living in a state of suspense, biding their time until things settled, and they could talk.

After lunch one day, Alec announced that he wanted to go for a walk. He was feeling cabin fever – a good sign, thought Catarina – and craved the feel of open space. Alec had not been outside the first time he had come to the cottage; in fact, he was not even certain that there was a way to get down from this house that seemed to float tens of meters above the ground. After asking him whether he truly felt up to the challenge, Magnus offered to accompany him and guided him through a set of wooden stairs that started off the terrace and spiraled down the trunk of a gigantic Douglas fir. As they went, Magnus stopped every so often to point the different features of the beautiful landscape that surrounded the small island on which the cottage was located. The place reminded Alec a little of Idris, with its majestic mountains and snow-peaked volcanoes visible through the trees. The only difference was the scent of brine and seaweed that told Alec that they were near the ocean.

Once they got to the bottom of the stairs, they walked for a while along a trail that zigzagged among the trees following the contours of the island. When they arrived at a small beach, they sat on a rock silently and without touching, just the sound of the ocean lapping against the shore interrupting the stillness.

"This is a beautiful place Magnus," Alec said after a long while. "It is such a privilege to be here after what we went through, don't you think?" It was the first time that Alec made any reference to their ordeal and even though he did not say anything more, Magnus knew exactly what he meant. "I wish I could stay here forever, live like a mundane, have an ordinary life, be completely oblivious to the existence of demons. Perhaps I could even become a fisherman, live off the fruits of the sea, or rummage for berries and hunt for game in the forest. Wouldn't that be nice?" he added as he looked out towards the mountains in the distance, a wistful expression in his eyes.

Magnus turned and looked at Alec with surprise. In the time they had known each other, he had always believed that Alec was happy and fulfilled in his life as a Shadowhunter, especially since he had become the leader of the New York Institute. It was a life and a role for which he had trained all his life. But now that Alec mentioned it, Magnus realized that Shadowhunting was not necessarily something Alec had chosen for himself. Like all other Nephilim, his sacred duty had been drilled into him since birth. Magnus thought that while he, Magnus, could not help who he was, Alec had not been given the choice to be anything else. They were in a way, both trapped in lives they had not chosen for themselves. The thought made him a little sad, for there where so many things that he wanted Alec to experience and see; he wanted for Alec a life full of possibilities and dreams but being a Shadowhunter meant being tied to duty. "We are but dust and shadows," was the Shadowhunter motto and that meant that they could be nothing else.

Yet, the sad expression in Alec's eyes told him that perhaps his latest experiences had made him reconsider the direction that his life had taken. Perhaps those experiences were making him wish for a different life, a different destiny, a different outcome. Perhaps having come so close to death had made Alec wish for things he had never thought he missed.

"I can teach you how to fish," Magnus said pushing aside the sad thoughts, not wishing yet to start a conversation that he knew would be painful and difficult. "I was born in a fishing village, you know. I may even have some fishing equipment lying around somewhere. Salmon season is great around these parts."

"I would like that," Alec replied, a tentative smile lifting the corners of his mouth and competing with the melancholy of a moment ago. At that moment, Magnus was tempted once again to reach with his hand and rest it against Alec's chest, so he could feel Alec's steady and soothing heartbeat drumming against his palm. He wanted to smooth with his fingers the sad expression that stills furrowed Alec's brow. He wanted to kiss him, run his fingers through his hair, pull him against his own body, wrap him in his arms and shelter him. But he contained himself, or rather, the look of sadness and perhaps uncertainty in Alec's eyes stopped him.

They walked back in easy companionship, Magnus regaling Alec with stories of the different times he had built and rebuilt the cottage, and of the local people he had met. By the time they got back, the exercise and the fresh air had returned some of the color to Alec's cheeks and Magnus' stories had managed to push away some of the unhappy thoughts. Still, despite his refusal to accept Magnus' assistance, the effort of climbing all those stairs up to the house exhausted Alec and by the time they reached the terrace, he was breathing harder and moving even slower than usual.

"I think it is time for us to go back to New York," Catarina announced when Magnus and Alec walked in. "Alec is obviously doing better, and Tessa and I have things and people waiting for us."

"Should we all go back then?" Alec asked.

"You are not yet fit for duty," Catarina declared. "I have already informed Jace that you need at least another 5 days, if not ten. It is not even safe for you to use a portal yet. You may be feeling stronger, but you are not fully recovered. You cannot even climb the stairs without losing your breath," she added, waving a hand in Alec's direction as if the evidence was plainly visible. "I will come back to check on you in a couple of days and then we will see. Magnus, I trust that you will keep up with Alec's treatment and monitor his recovery. Do not tire him out, you hear?"

"I will do my best," Magnus replied.

"I expect more than your best," Catarina said.

The next two hour were a flurry of activity with Catarina and Tessa preparing for their departure. At one point, Alec went upstairs to the bedroom to write a fire message to Jace and Izzy informing them that he was doing well and that he hoped to be back soon. He also wanted to reassure them that he trusted that they would keep the Institute running smoothly while he was away. Tessa knocked and walked in as he was finishing sending the message.

"I would like to show you something Alec," she said, a mixture of uncertainty and nervousness in her voice. "Very few people have seen this," she added as with shaking fingers she undid the top buttons of her shirt and, turning, exposed her shoulder for Alec to see. There on her shoulder blade, a silver mark was clearly visible against her fair skin, a silver mark that looked like a halfmoon.

"How did you get that?" Alec asked trying to gather his thoughts, for the similarities between his own scars and Tessa's was undeniable.

"You know I am half-Nephilim. My mother was an unmarked Shadowhunter. Yet, the demon blood that runs in my veins also makes me a warlock. I was born without a demon mark and without powers; this mark appeared on my skin when my magic first started manifesting."

"What does that mean? Do you think your mark has some connection to the scars on my skin?" Alec's mind was racing, several thoughts rattling around his skull, crashing against one another, not making any sense.

"I don't know," she replied with as much honesty as she could infuse into the words. "I don't know why you came back from hell with marks like those on you," Tessa added, reaching and taking Alec's hand, the gesture warm and comforting. "They may mean nothing; they may even disappear in a few days, weeks or months. They may even mean that the kind of contact you had with demonic forces had a particular effect on you as a Nephilim. Whatever it is, I will help you figure it out. You can count on me as you know you can also count on Magnus. He helped me once in ways that I cannot even begin to explain, and I will help you if you let me. In the meantime, try not to worry. You still have some healing to do."

"Thank you, Tessa," Alec said, and his voice was full of sincerity; for Tessa as well as Catarina had risked so much to help him. All along he had thought that they had assisted him because of their loyalty and friendship towards Magnus. But now Tessa was offering a gift of friendship meant just for him, and he was grateful.

"I will be in touch," Tessa announced as she stood on tiptoes and kissed Alec on the cheek. "In the meantime, do not fret over what you cannot know or control yet."

"Do you want me to pick up some takeout on my way back?" Magnus asked Alec as he and Tessa came downstairs and found Magnus in the middle of the living room opening the portal through which he would take their friends home.

"Sure," Alec replied. He then hugged Tessa and Catarina in turn and thanked them for everything they had done for him.

"Remember to take it easy," Catarina told him in her best schoolmaster voice before she stepped through the portal after Tessa.

"I will be back shortly," Magnus then said as he too walked through. The portal then flickered and vanished in a shower of tiny sparkles, leaving the house in silence.

For a few moments, Alec stared at the spot where portal had been and thought that he would miss the two women who, in their own particular ways, had become permanent fixtures of his life in the last weeks. He would miss Tessa's quiet intelligence and unassuming demeanor; he would even miss Catarina's dry humor and sharp tongue. He, who had been raised in a climate of distrust towards anyone who was not a Nephilim, and especially towards Downwolders, would have never imagined that he would grow so close and be so thankful to those two warlocks.

Suddenly aware of the emptiness and silence that surrounded him, Alec took a turn around the room, and realized that for the first time in a long time he had no mission to accomplish, no immediate duties to fulfill or reports to write. The sensation was strange. Yet, perhaps because he was tired and still weak, it was not unsettling. It occurred to him that perhaps he should find something to do: read a book, do maintenance on his bow and quiver which had managed to survive the journey back from hell strapped to Magnus' back, or even tidy up or clean the kitchen. But then he thought better of it, and instead walked out on the terrace and leaned against the railing, admiring once again the breathtaking view, letting the sunlight and the landscape pull him into a state of silent meditation. He didn't know how long he stood there, relishing in the quiet and peace, but at one point, he became aware of the breeze that ruffled his hair and he imagined what it would be like to be a bird gliding in the wind, completely careless and free. Wanting to experience that sensation of freedom, he closed his eyes, looked up to the sky, extended his arms wide and let the wind kiss his face. As he did, he imagined that he could fly, that he could travel with the wind to new and unknown places, places where there were no demons, or hell and the horror it contained. For a split moment, he even thought that he was floating above the ground, untethered and completely free, and the sensation was exhilarating and liberating.

Rather than portaling right into the middle of the living room, and not wanting to startle Alec, Magnus directed the portal to open in the foyer by the entrance. When he stepped through and set the takeout bags on the floor, he noticed how quiet the place was and wondered whether Alec, exhausted after their walk, had fallen asleep. Yet, as he quietly walked into the living room, Magnus saw that Alec was standing out on the terrace with his eyes closed, his face turned up towards the sky and his arms extended to the winds. The setting sun kissed his face and painted his skin in gold, red and orange, making him look almost luminous, like an angel touched by the hand of god. The scene was utterly serene and so strikingly beautiful that it took Magnus' breath away. He stood motionless for a while, refusing to move for fear that he would break the spell and the image of Alec the angel would dissolve.

After a few moments and perhaps feeling his presence, Alec opened his eyes, brought his arms down to his sides, turned to look at Magnus and smiled, one of those smiles capable of illuminating the darkest of nights. "You are back," he said. "How was New York?"

As if he had been overtaken by a power he could not control, or as if his feet were moving of their own volition, Magnus wordlessly walked with sure and steady steps towards Alec, his eyes looking at the Shadowhunter with a burning intensity. As Alec had done all those months ago, Magnus stopped just a few inches in front of him. He then reached for Alec's hand, the way he had wanted to do ever since he returned from the Spiral Labyrinth, the feel of Alec's skin sending shivers up and down Magnus' spine. Alec's breath caught in his throat and goosebumps rose on the skin, and Magnus thought his heart was melting.

For a moment, they stood silently looking into each other's eyes, just their hands touching while their hearts drummed against their chests. And then Magnus shifted his gaze from Alec's eyes down to his lips, and for a second, he thought the anticipation was going to undue him. Yet he managed to resist a little longer, wanting to delay the gratification he knew was just within reach, wanting to savor every millisecond, commit them to memory so he could remember this moment for ever. When he thought the waiting would kill him, he finally and very gently closed the distance between his lips and Alec's, the feel of those soft lips and the scent of Alec invading every corner of him, erasing everything else, until nothing else existed in the world but this man he loved with an intensity that overwhelmed him.

At the beginning, the kiss was soft, gentle and even chaste, but then Alec let go of the breath that had caught in his chest. As he did, he parted his lips, just a little but oh so enticingly that Magnus could not help but run his tongue over those lips. The gesture stoked the fire that had never truly gone out between them, and before they knew it, Magnus was running the hand that was not holding Alec's hand down Alec's back and Alec was running the fingers of his own free hand through Magnus' hair. As the kiss intensified, Magnus became tongue and Alec mouth, and Magnus explored him thoroughly, staking a new claim on the Shadowhunter. Alec leaned against the railing and Magnus followed, and soon Alec was trapped between the railing and Magnus' strong body, and he thought he would rather lose his freedom for ever if it meant that he could remain exactly where he was.

Magnus and Alec had had a first kiss before, a wonderful first kiss that had also been a moment of decision, the moment when Alec openly recognized who he was for the first time. But this tender and gentle kiss also felt like a first, a new discovery, a new surrender and a new beginning. Magnus thought that Alec's lips were the gateway into heaven, and Alec felt that the kiss was finally knitting to his body the last of his soul that was still unattached, healing him and completing him.

Alec brought his hand to Magnus' cheek, the touch soft and demanding at the same time, and Magnus, wanting to melt into Alec's body, moved even closer, wrapping his arms around Alec's waist and pulling him to him. Suddenly, an involuntary whimper escaped Alec's lips and the memory of Alec's injured body abruptly brought Magnus back to his senses and he let go of his claim on Alec's lips and tried to pull away. But Alec stopped him by wrapping one of his arms around Magnus' waist to hold him in place. He then rested his forehead against Magnus' forehead, his breathing shallow and his eyes close.

"I hurt you," Magnus whispered, his own chest rising and falling rapidly.

"I am fine Magnus, just a little sore, that's all." Alec's voice was also a whisper.

"Do you want to go in and sit down?"

"No, I want to stay here with you forever," Alec replied and regaled Magnus with another of his dazzling smiles, not a trace of sadness in his expression. It was Alec then the one to claim Magnus' lips, he the one to gently entice them to part so his own tongue could explore his mouth. It was Alec the one to pull Magnus closer, pushing past pain and discomfort, wanting to feel every inch of Magnus' body against his own. At that moment Alec thought he understood what it felt like to drink after days of thirst, to feel the sun against one's skin after decades in the darkness, to breath fresh air for the first time in one's life. He did not care that his body still pained him, he did not care for the scars that now marked his chest. He only cared for the sublime sensation of Magnus so close to him.

"I too want to remain here for all eternity, Alexander," Magnus said much, much later when he was sure his lips were swollen and red from all that kissing, and his skin and clothes were completely impregnated with Alec's masculine scent. "But it gets awfully cold here at night and Catarina would kill me if you got pneumonia because of me."

Alec smiled once again, his forehead resting against Magnus'. He then looked up and realized that daylight had completely surrendered to a dark night and that the sounds of birdsongs had been replaced by the hooting of owls awakening for another night of hunting. A shiver run through him and he realized that his back was cold from leaning against the railing for so long, and that it was likely that his feet had also gone to sleep.

"Come Alexander," Magnus said, taking Alec's hand and turning to walk back inside. "I am glad I brought sushi, or after all this time, I would have had to heat our dinner. Now I only have to heat the miso soup and that, I can do with a simple spell."

They walked back inside and while Magnus set up dinner on the coffee table, Alec lighted a fire, the smell of smoke comforting and familiar. They then sat on the floor in front of the fire and ate and talked, and for a while they forgot their misadventure and the weeks of separation and sadness. Instead, they relished in the feeling of simply being with one another, just two people who were getting to know one another once again, two people united by feelings and emotions that were as old as time.

Alec, using his chopsticks, placed a piece of deep fried banana covered in caramel in Magnus' mouth, and the gesture was inviting and full of promise. Magnus did the same, and he followed the gesture with a kiss, the taste of sugar and fruit in Alec's lips awakening every one of his senses. Knowing that there was no way that he could top Magnus' gesture, Alec gave up on his attempt to feed Magnus. Instead, he grabbed him by the front of his shirt and pulled him towards him, claiming his mouth, the kiss demanding and giving with astonishing greediness and generosity. Slowly and with incredible seductiveness, he began to run his lips down Magnus' neck starting at his ear and ending at that sweet spot where neck met shoulder and where Magnus' scent was the most intoxicating.

"I thought I would never get to kiss you again, Magnus" he whispered between shallow breaths a while later, and Magnus knew exactly what Alec meant, for he too had lost hope of ever having the Shadowhunter in his arms again.

They kissed and caressed each other for hours that night, each one wanting to once again memorize the taste and feel of the other. They did not make love, however, or rather they expressed love in other ways. It was not something they agreed on; it was simply not something they wanted to rush into, especially considering that Alec was not yet fully recovered. Instead, they held each other, speaking little sweet things in each other' ears, relishing in the pure sensation of being in each other's arms. At one point, exhausted after such an eventful day, Alec dozed off, his head resting on Magnus' lap, and Magnus spent a long while watching him sleep and running his fingers through his messy hair, while listening to the soothing sound of the ocean in the distance. After a while, however, he grew concerned that Alec would be even more sore and weak in the morning if he slept on the floor and gently awoke him.

"Let's get you up to bed, Alexander" he whispered, as he helped Alec to his feet and then up the stairs. "Good night," he then said at the door of his bedroom and before he could change his mind, turned and went back downstairs, to his spot on the sofa, happier than he had been in a long time.

They were on the couch having coffee the next morning, the weak spring sunshine filtering through the enormous windows and illuminating Magnus' golden skin and bouncing against his black hair still wet from the shower. Alec sat beside him, their bodies touching, and Magnus was telling him about a new ancient manuscript he had been hired to translate. After a moment, Alec turned to look at Magnus and smiled in a particularly suggestive way.

"What is it?" Magnus asked feeling suddenly self-conscious. "Do I have a milk mustache?"

"No," replied Alec. "It is just that this is the image that I pictured in my mind when you asked me to remember this place." He then shifted his gaze away from Magnus' eyes and slowly traced with his own eyes the length of Magnus' long neck and continued down Magnus' muscular chest and stomach visible through his open silk robe. The sensation of Alec's eyes on him felt like the touch of feather on Magnus's skin, and the force of those eyes made his skin respond with millions of goosebumps.

As his eyes continued their journey, Alec bit his lower lip in that way that always made Magnus a little crazy. "You here beside me, looking as you do now, was the image that beckoned me out of the void and back into the world. This was the image with which you saved me," Alec added. He then bent down and planted a gentle kiss in the middle of Magnus' chest, in the same spot where now Alec bore the scar from when Magnus pushed him out of that horrible red hell. His mouth then began a slow journey up along Magnus sternum and in the direction of Magnus' neck. His fingers followed suit, tracing slow maddening circles on Magnus' abdomen and chest, circles that felt electric and magnetic and that clouded Magnus' mind until he thought he would forget even his own name. When Alec finally reached his lips, Magnus performed a quick spell with which he deposited the coffee cup he had been holding on the table, freeing his hand. He then entangled his fingers in Alec's hair, the last remnants of the spell leaving luminescent traces as they went along.

For a while, nothing else in the universe existed but the maddeningly soft touch of Alec's fingers on his skin, the feel of Alec's soft and demanding lips, and the scent and taste of Alec in his own lips. Magnus surrendered to the touch and allowed his body to melt against the sofa, allowing Alec to continue drawing lines on his skin, sure that each touch was magical and capable of leaving the feel of Alec permanently edged on his body.

"Alexander," he said when he thought his heart would explode from all the emotions it contained, "I had to go find you because I didn't think I could live without you." Suddenly, Magnus realized that tears were running down his cheeks, and that a torrent of emotions were threatening to overcome him.

Alec rested his forehead against Magnus' and with gentle fingers wiped the tears away. The gesture was so tender and caring that more tears threatened to fall just so Alec could carry them away in his fingers. "Then you know how I felt, for I too could not leave you in that place," he whispered. He then pulled Magnus to him and wrapped his arms around him, sheltering him with his body and allowing Magnus to anchor him once more.

 **I think this chapter could still use some work, but I hope you enjoy it.**


	15. Chapter 15 - Truths and Passions

**Truths and Passions**

"Do you want to tell me what happened to you in hell?" Alec tentatively asked. He had been silently holding Magnus for a few moments, one arm firmly wrapped around Magnus' body, while with the other, he caressed the hair in the back of Magnus' head. Their half-finished coffees were forgotten on the table beside their half-eaten toasts. Alec felt Magnus' chest rise and fall against his own chest, and with each inhalation and exhalation, Magnus' body relaxed, as if in this embrace, Magnus was finally letting go of all the tension he had been accumulating since this whole ordeal began.

The feel of Magnus' arms around his waist was both tender and strong, and Alec was once again surprised by how easily things and qualities that would appear contradictory in anyone else coexisted perfectly in Magnus; how strength and tenderness, power and vulnerability, physical might and sensibility seamlessly coalesced in Magnus as if contradictions had no meaning. This was the Magnus he had fallen in love with, the one that flirted openly with him but never pushed or impose himself, the one who, when he knew Alec needed time to decide his own path, was content to wait and offer safe friendship, the one who had gone to the depth of hell for him.

"Only if you also want to tell me what happened to you," Magnus replied, his tone also tentative, his voice soft against Alec's shoulder. "But we do not have to talk about it now if you are not ready Alexander."

"The experts say that it is better to talk about things," Alec replied with a sigh. He unwrapped his arms from around Magnus' body and leaned back on the couch. He then took Magnus' hand in his as if he needed the touch to anchor him to reality. Magnus half turned, folded one leg under him, rested the elbow of his free arm on the back of the couch and his head on his hand, and looked at Alec, his expression serene and completely open.

"You were there with me, you know," Alec started, and his eyes were piercing as they looked into Magnus' eyes as if with his eyes, Alec wanted Magnus to grasp the full meaning of his words. "Or, rather, I think it was the part of you that still remains a child."

Once the first words were out of his mouth, he could not stop the rest and the story began to pour out of him as if the barriers that had contained it had broken. Alec told Magnus about the child who had accompanied him through the first part of his journey, about the things that the child had shown him, the sad and loving memories that the young Magnus had shared with him. As he spoke, he run the fingers of the hand not holding Magnus' up and down Magnus' arm, the fingers awakening every cell they touched along the way. For a split moment, Magnus felt his magic coming alive under Alec's touch, as if Alec had the power to summon it, as if his magic obeyed Alec's silent command. Magnus looked down and thought he saw Alec's fingers leaving thin lines of silver sparkles as they journeyed along his skin, as if he was drawing magical lines on his arm. The sensation was puzzling and surprising, but not wanting to get distracted from what Alec was telling him, he did not say anything. Instead, he quickly regained control over his unruly powers and turned his attention back to Alec.

"You look like you mother, you know," Alec said a few minutes later by way of a conclusion to this chapter in his tale. "She was beautiful."

"Over the centuries my memories of her have changed," Magnus said with a wistful smile. "I was so young when she killed herself. For a long time, I blamed myself for her death. At other times, especially during dark times, I blamed her for leaving me, for not loving me the way I am, for not accepting me. After all, I had no say on the conditions of my conception and birth. But over the years I have come to understand how difficult it was for her to bear a child she could not understand; how difficult it was for someone brought up in such deeply religious environment to come to terms with the fact that she had given birth to the offspring of a demon. In time, I forgave her."

"I can tell," Alec observed with a gentle, even if still sad, smile. "Your memories of her seem completely devoid of resentment. At least, I assume those were your memories of her. It could have been one of Asmodeus's tricks."

"I don't know, or rather I don't think so," Magnus stated. "Aldous recorded in his book that a few times during his experiments with petrifying warlocks, he contacted different versions of the warlocks' consciousness. It is likely that you encountered a part of my subconscious, especially considering that the child did not try to harm you, but rather help you."

"If that is the case, it was a very cute part of your subconscious," Alec said, the smile turning playful. He then leaned and kissed Magnus gently on the cheek, the touch of his lips causing goosebumps to rise on Magnus' neck and arms.

"I saw the child again," Alec continued, and now his expression grew somber. "After I fell through the demon trap, I landed in a cage in a dark dungeon. Asmodeus was there and he had you, the young you, in another cage." Alec's voice trailed off and he looked out towards the distance, his mind lost in some terrible memory. Magnus did not press for details knowing that Alec would tell him as much as he needed to and only when he was ready.

"He hurt you so badly, Magnus, and he made me watch," Alec added after a while. That had been the truly hellish part of his ordeal, and his most traumatic and painful memory of his time in the Seventh Circle. Likely knowing that the best way of tormenting Alec was not by hurting him directly, but rather by making him helplessly witness how he tortured someone else, specially someone as powerless as a child, Amadeus had made him watch as he inflicted the worst of torments on the fragile body of the young Magnus. "You were so strong and so brave," he said, and it was now his tears that Magnus wiped away, and his chest the one that rose and fell as Alec tried to bring his emotions under control. "There are things that are so horrible that are better left undescribed."

Alec felt silent for a while and Magnus thought he could see the memories that were playing in Alec's mind, and wished he could smooth them out with a gentle touch of his fingers. "Anyway, I think he eventually got tired and let his demons have at me. He likely thought that they would break me" he concluded, the memory of that child's suffering forever edged in his mind.

"My father's cruelty knows no bounds," Magnus stated, his voice as sharp as a knife. "He has a knack for discovering your weaknesses and enjoys taking advantage of them. But you must know, Alexander, that none of those things happened to me. I was already out and back home by then. He made you see those terrible things, but it was not me. It was likely a demon taking the form of the child. He wanted to break you as he tried to do with me."

Alec shifted his gaze from the window back to Magnus, and his eyes were full of questions and apprehension. If Asmodeus, who barely knew Alec, had been able to learn and then exploit his most enduring weakness, he could only imagine what he was capable of doing to someone who was of his own blood. "What did he do Magnus?" he asked and gently squeezed Magnus' hand in an encouraging gesture.

Magnus told Alec about Asmodeus' attempts to play tricks with his memory; how he made Magnus relive so many moments just to rewrite them and change them. In an even voice, Magnus told Alec how Asmodeus made him see so many of his achievements become failures; how he saw Catarina burn at the stake, and Tessa die at the hands of the monster that orchestrated her creation. As he spoke, he looked out the window, the way Alec had previously done, and kept a firm hold on Alec's hand, as if needing an anchor.

"When that did not work," he said a while later as he turned to look at Alec, "he made me see you die over and over again. He would convince me that I could save you, and every time I thought I would manage it, he found even more bloody and destructive ways to kill you." After countless bloody deaths, Magnus had been covered in Alec's blood and many times, he had thought that he would rather give up, surrender to Asmodeus' control as long as he didn't have to watch the man he loved die one more time.

"But you didn't give up," Alec commented.

"No," Magnus said and smiled sadly, "because every time I thought I was done, I heard your voice calling for me, or I felt the touch of your fingers across my forehead or along my arm, and the sensation reminded me that everything my father was making me see was an illusion. Eventually, he gave up. And then you were truly there, and he thought that he would finally win, that we would break, and he would achieve his objective. But he was wrong, wasn't he? He didn't know how tenacious a Shadowhunters you are."

"Not as tenacious as you, Magnus," Alec said. "What do you think happened to Asmodeus? Is he dead?"

"No, but I did manage to send him to a pretty deep and obscured part of hell," Magnus replied with a smug smile. "It will take him some time to climb back up, centuries I hope."

"As usual warlock, you are amazing," Alec said and kissed him, deeply and tenderly, his fingers once again tracing those maddening lines up and down his arm, those lines that made Magnus' magic unruly. Magnus felt the powerful pull of Alec's body, as if Alec was a star and he the planet caught in its orbit, hopelessly and forever tied to it.

"I am sorry Magnus," Alec whispered when after a long while of slow and ever more passionate kissing he rested his forehead against Magnus'. "You must know that me kissing that Shadowhunter is a mistake I will regret all my life. You must know that I regretted it the moment it happened. I was stupid and childish and, you were right, I was not mature enough to accept your immortality and the place of our relationship in your life. I didn't know I would hurt you so badly, I don't know how else to ask for your forgiveness."

"Shush," Magnus said and placed his index finger on Alec's lips. "We were both to blame because I didn't want to recognize that the strength of my feelings for you scared me. I could not say that I was also struggling with my own immortality and with the certainty that I would lose you one day. Instead, I placed all the blame on you."

"But Magnus, I am the most to blame. Look at what my stupidity cost you. I almost lost you; you almost lost yourself."

"Alexander," Magnus said and turned the full force of his eyes on Alec, "you must know that I didn't intend to petrify. That was all Asmodeus; he must have been lurking at the edge that separates our world from hell, bidding his time, looking for an opportunity. He found that opportunity during one of my moments of weakness. He has been wanting to come back to the mundane world ever since I vanished him almost three hundred years ago, and since I am his closest blood connection, I was the perfect candidate. It is not your fault or my fault."

"He didn't know who he was going against, did he?" Alec said, and his smile was, for the first time since this conversation began, completely unguarded.

"As one of my friends used to say: he came for roasted pig and left with his tail in flames," Magnus said with a chuckle.

For a long while, they sat in silence, their hands interlaced, their eyes in the distance, each in their own thoughts until Magnus' stomach growled and Alec laughed. "We should fix you some lunch Magnus," he said and kissed him, the kiss intending to be swift. But Magnus had other ideas and bringing his hand to the back of Alec's head held him in place while he gently but thoroughly explored his mouth until he felt heady and intoxicated with the scent and taste of Alec. At that moment, he did not care if he died of starvation as long as he could nourish his senses with the feel and taste of the Shadowhunter. However, his unruly stomach was not about to give up and its second growl caused Alec to chuckle once again.

"Come on Magnus, food is in order," Alec declared, standing up. He stood still for a moment trying to control the dizziness that suddenly threatened to make him lose his balance.

"Are you okay Alexander?" Magnus asked swiftly standing up and giving Alec a look of deep concern.

"Fine, I just got up too quickly."

"You are still convalescing and here I am tiring you out. Catarina is going to kill me if she knows I am not taking proper care of you."

"I am fine, Magnus," Alec said in a firmer tone. "Now, what do you feel like eating?"

Magnus and Alec spent the rest of the day in a state of peaceful contentment. After lunch, they went for another walk and this time, when they stopped near the water, Magnus approached Alec from behind and wrapped his arms around him, planting a gentle kiss in the back of Alec's neck and resting his chin on his shoulder. Alec relaxed against him and together they spend a long while watching a pair of bald eagles diving and catching fish. When the eagles finally flew away, their hunger apparently sated, Alec turned his head towards Magnus and Magnus' lips were waiting.

They kissed for a long while, their hands running up and down each other's arms and backs, and their fingers entangling themselves in each other's hair, only the forest and the ocean as witnesses. When the air grew colder, they walked hand in hand back to the house, talking about everything and nothing, completely happy in each other's company. They had a quiet dinner and when Alec's eyes began to slowly close at the dinner table, Magnus ordered him to bed. He then kissed him passionately at the bottom of the stairs.

Magnus did not offer to go with him and Alec did not ask. It was not that he did not want Magnus with every cell of his body. In fact, in more than one occasion throughout the day when they had been slowly kissing and caressing each other, he had thought they would finally take things further, that they would finally surrender to the desire Alec knew they both felt. It was just that he suspected that Magnus wanted to take things slow and he did not want to rush him.

"What do you say about going for a drive today Alexander?" Magnus asked the next day after breakfast.

"A drive in what?" Alec asked turning from the dishes he was washing and looking at Magnus with a surprised and curious expression.

"In my car, of course."

"You have a car?!" Alec said, his tone now astonished.

"Alexander, I may be three hundred years old, but I am perfectly capable of keeping up with technology. Of course, I have a car, a very nice car, mind you. It is parked on the mainland."

"I didn't even know you could drive Magnus," Alec said amazed.

"I am full of surprises," Magnus stated, and his smile was flirtatious and a little smug. "Anyway, I think you are strong enough to tolerate a short portal journey just to the other side of the wards. Catarina wants to see you, but she cannot portal directly here. I was thinking we can meet her by the car and then we can go for a drive, have a late lunch or early dinner at a restaurant I know before we come back."

"Okay, but do you even have a driver's license? How old does it say you are?" Alec chuckled when he saw the feigned expression of woundedness in Magnus' face.

"You are healing nicely," Catarina declared a couple of hours later after she examined Alec. "The pain on your chest should begin to subside soon, and you should also begin to feel stronger. You are not yet fit for duty though. You still need a few more days."

They were sitting on the back seat of Magnus' shiny black SUV, which was parked by the side of a road that meandered along the foot of the most beautiful mountains that Alec had ever seen. Magnus was in the driver's seat and his body was half-turned to the back to better see what Catarina was doing. He had already gotten an earful from his friend for making Alec go through a portal and no matter how much Alec had reassured her that he felt fine, Catarina remained unconvinced.

Alec thought that very few things got past Catarina, that no matter what he said, she could tell that, despite being brief and the distance it travelled short, the journey through the portal had made Alex dizzy and aggravated the pain on his chest.

"You did not tell me that your chest was paining you Alexander," Magnus now said, a wounded and concerned tone in his voice.

"It is nothing," Alec replied, his voice a little bit more forceful than he intended. He was growing frustrated with his body's slow recovery and kept thinking that he should be back to normal and to duty by now.

"Anyway," Catarina interrupted in her usual nurse-like tone. "I trust that Magnus is not tiring you out. He can be a bit tiresome, you know. You should be fine to go back to the cottage by portal but, Alec, do not overdue it. I told Jace that I would not clear you for duty until you were as recovered as possible, so don't push yourself beyond your limits." Catarina pointed her index finger first in his direction and then in Magnus' direction in a gesture meant to convey that all kinds of nasty consequences would result if either of them disobeyed.

Catarina declined their invitation to dinner, indicating that she was on duty first thing in the morning and needed to get some sleep. After she portalled back to New York, Alec and Magnus got in Magnus' car and drove through a breathtaking landscape to a quaint little village about a hundred kilometers away. The road snaked along a shoreline that separated mountains and ocean, and at times it seemed to tilt at the edge threatening to fall into the deep blue waters. The day was clear and by the time they arrived at the restaurant, Alec felt his lungs were full of the purest air he had ever breathed.

"You are a good driver, Magnus," Alec commented over their plates of cedar planked salmon and roasted potatoes. They were sitting by an enormous fireplace at an elegant restaurant, the dining room illuminated by candles, the windows framing a breathtaking view of the sun setting behind the mountains. The dining room was full, and since Alec was not glamored, he felt particularly conspicuous after so many days of isolation. A few of the other dinners turned to surreptitiously look at them, wondering, Alec suspected, about the nature of their relationship, or perhaps about the marks on his skin, which mundanes called tattoos. Magnus, on his part, seemed completely unconcerned and at ease.

"Of course, I am a good driver. I drove the very first model that Henry Ford produced."

"I am not surprised," Alec commented. "It is just that I have always felt so inept when it comes to the most basic mundane things, like driving, taking planes, or even getting a passport. You seemed so adept to all those things."

"I can teach you to drive if you want. It is really not that hard."

"I would like that," Alec said, and the conversation reminded him of their talk of fishing and ordinary mundane life a few days ago.

As the sky slowly turned from bright orange to a deep blue, they drove back in silent companionship, Alec's eyes on the landscape as if he wanted to impregnate himself in the beautiful view, as if he wanted the view to erase all the dark memories of the last few weeks. When Magnus reached and took his hand, he turned to look at the warlock and Magnus smiled, his eyes full of fire and longing. Unable to stop himself and certain that Magnus would be able to use his magic to prevent them from going off the road, he leaned in and kissed Magnus on that sweet spot behind his ear. He then gently bit the warlock's earlobe, relishing in the sensation of soft skin between his teeth, the intoxicating scent of Magnus, and the goosebumps he felt rising on Magnus's skin.

Magnus turned the wheel and parked the car on the side of the deserted road, and after swiftly turning off the engine, turned and claimed Alec's lips with a hunger and desire that surprised even him. Neither of them would remember much what happened next but in no time, Magnus had undone his seatbelt and swinging his legs had come to sit astride Alec, his hands entangled in Alec's hair. Alec wrapped his arms around Magnus' hips and with Nephilim strength pulled him even closer. One hand then found the bottom of Magnus' shirt and desperately journeyed under it searching for the feel of Magnus' skin, running fingers and nails down Magnus' strong back, the touch causing Magnus to gasp in that way that always made Alec lose his senses.

With a rapid motion that was likely aided by not a small amount of magic, someone made the seat tilt back and then Alec was lying almost flat and Magnus was on top of him, his mouth on a maddening journey down Alec's long neck and his fingers searching for the bottom of Alec's shirt. When Magnus bit him on the side of the neck, Alec gasped and grabbing Magnus' behind pulled him even closer, savoring in the way in which Magnus' hips had begun to move against his body.

Alec had never been much for riding in cars, and if someone had asked him before, he would have said that the room in the passenger side was not big enough for him and Magnus. For even if Magnus was slightly shorter, he was still a big man, they both were. But at this moment, he felt that cars were his new favorite thing, just small enough to not allow for too much distance between him and Magnus. After a long while, Alec finally gathered the nerve to bring his hands to Magnus' belt buckle, but Magnus stopped him by placing his own hands atop Alec's.

"Not like this, Shadowhunter," Magnus said, his voice coming out in a gasp. "Not in a rush or in a place where I cannot taste you and have you the way I want, or where you cannot have me the way you want."

"Oh warlock, you are driving me mad, you know," Alec said lifting his hands and running them through his hair in a way that made his hair look truly like the hair of a madman.

"I suspect that I do that a lot," Magnus replied and gave Alec one of those smiles that contained just the right amount of seductiveness and innocence. He then gently placed his hand on Alec's chest, in the spot where his scar was located under his shirt. "You didn't tell me that your chest was paining you," he said once again.

"It does not hurt any worse than the rest of my injuries," Alec lied, and he exercised all his willpower to stop the scar from reacting to Magnus' touch the way it had reacted to Catarina's, the effort increasing the pain and pressure he felt on his chest. He was pretty certain that the scar had become very visible and silvery under his shirt, and, not for the first time, felt that something was trapped in his chest, something that was struggling to get free.

"I do not want you to keep things from me Alexander. You do not have to be stoic, and I cannot help you if you do not tell when you are hurting." Magnus kissed him swiftly this time, and then shifted positions and went back to the driver's seat. "Let's go home, shall we?"

The portal deposited them in the foyer and when they came through, Alec had to reach for Magnus' hand to steady himself, the energy from the portal putting undue pressure on his chest. When Magnus, who had been talking animatedly about a concert he had once attended, looked back, Alec once again called on all his willpower to compose his features. He replied to Magnus' inquisitorial expression by gently grabbing Magnus' upper arm and pulling him closer, quieting any questions with a kiss. The contact with the warlock's body made Alec feel steady and grounded and eased the sudden dizziness caused by the journey through folded space.

The kiss quickly intensified and in no time, Magnus was pushing Alec against the wall, kissing him with ever increasing desperation, holding on to him as if Alec was a life line and he a drowning man. As Magnus pressed his body against Alec's, Alec could feel how much the warlock wanted him, and the intensity of Magnus' desire and hunger for him reignited and made the fire in his own body burn hotter. Feeling finally steady on his feet, Alec grabbed Magnus by his hips and turned, so he could now be the one to pin Magnus against the wall. With ever more desperate desire, Alec began to plant kisses up and down Magnus' neck, completely oblivious to time and space. When he felt Magnus' hands rounding his behind and pulling him closer, Alec made a superhuman effort for self-control and, remembering Magnus' words in the car, stopped the kissing. He rested his forehead against Magnus' and looked into the warlock's eyes with burning desire. After a moment, he sighed in an effort to settle his racing heart, then took a step back, and grabbing Magnus's hand, turned towards the stairway.

"Come Magnus," Alec said, his voice certain and his tone authoritative, "it is time you come to bed with me."

"Alexander," Magnus replied and halted Alec's attempt to pull him along, "you are not strong enough yet, and after all this time, I am afraid I may lose control."

"I want you to lose control," Alec replied turning to look at Magnus. "I like it when you lose control, and I know you won't hurt me, like you know I will not hurt you. I want you Magnus," he whispered in Magnus' ear. "I want to come apart, break in a thousand pieces in your arms."

The breath caught in Magnus' throat, and Alec knew he had won that argument. With certain and steady steps, he guided Magnus up the stairs and into the bedroom. However, they did not make it to the bed until much, much later, and not until Alec had put Magnus' mind completely at ease as to his physical capacities.

As soon as they walked through the doorway and Magnus closed the door behind them, Alec turned and placing his hands on both sides of Magnus' face, kissed him gently, and even innocently. Yet, the kiss was full of promises and expectations. "Magnus, I can't begin to tell you how much I want you," he said during a break in the kiss, and then closed the distance between theirs mouths once again, determined to silence any remaining objections from Magnus. This time the kiss was not innocent or chaste but rather intense and mighty, and Magnus thanked all the gods for the gift of Alec's lips. For those lips were capable of making him feel that Alec was making love to him just by kissing him; for those lips were capable of bringing Magnus to his knees and make him forget even his own name.

When he reached for the buttons on Alec's shirt, it was Alec the one to stop him by placing his own hands on top of Magnus'. "Tsk, tsk," he said and shook his head, "right now you are mine."

With slow, deliberate and tender motions, Alec began to undo the buttons in Magnus' shirt, and as he slowly exposed Magnus chest, he gently and meticulously kissed, licked and bit the newly exposed skin starting with Magnus' neck, continuing with his shoulders and the hollow at the base of his throat. Once he had kissed every inch of Magnus' chest, he walked around, and as he slowly pulled Magnus' shirt down his back, Alec run his tongue down Magnus' spine starting at the base of his neck and slowly moving lower and lower as his fingers continued drawing lines and swirls all over Magnus' skin. As Alec slowly tormented him with his wicked mouth, Magnus thought that Alec was determined to drive him insane, but he did not care if he ended up mad as long as this was the reason for his madness.

They had not made love in months and, at least for the last few days, they had ached for each other with such intensity that Magnus expected their lovemaking to be a flurry of rushed, desperate and clumsy movements. But Alec had other plans, he wanted to enjoy the taste of every inch of Magnus, become once again intimately acquainted with the body of this man he loved with a passion that seemed to have no end. He wanted Magnus' body to relinquish every possible sound of pleasure and desire. He wanted to take his sweet, sweet time, slowly removing Magnus' clothes, kissing, licking and tasting him as he went along, restraining Magnus every time the warlock tried to rush him, tormenting him with slow and sinful movements of his fingers, lips and tongue.

"Perhaps you should light a fire," Alec whispered in Magnus' ear sometime later and when he felt a shiver run down Magnus' spine. "It is a little chilly tonight."

Understanding exactly what Alec was asking, Magnus obeyed and with a flick of his fingers threw a small ball of fiery magic towards the fireplace where logs were ready and waiting. Holding him by the waist and without breaking the kiss, Alec guided Magnus towards the couch in front of the fire and when they got there, he gently pushed him to sit down. He then kneeled in front of Magnus and began to draw a line of kisses that started in Magnus neck and went down along Magnus' chest and abdomen, his hands a few inches ahead of his lips loosening belt buckle, undoing buttons, pulling down zipper, and eventually slowly peeling off Magnus' jeans and underwear with a dexterity of which only Shadowhunters were capable.

Surrendering completely and knowing he had lost the battle even before it began, Magnus melted against the sofa, leaned his head back against the cushions, and allowed Alec to explore him and possess him completely and without resistance, the fingers of one hand in Alec's hair, his other hand tightly holding on to the upholstery in a futile attempt to stop himself from taking flight. If he had been able to formulate a coherence idea, Magnus would have thought that this moment was the most sinful and lustful of his life, that his body was completely exposed, completely naked and vulnerable and in the hands of a fully dressed Shadowhunter.

"You are beautiful," Alec whispered sometime later. "To have you just like this, naked and wanting me as much as I want you, is the most wonderful of gifts." Without waiting for a retort, Alec kissed Magnus again, his mouth even more demanding and domineering, before going back to his relentless exploration of the most intimate corners of Magnus' body.

Alec's words and the ministration of his sexy mouth and wicked hands became Magnus' whole universe as Alec lifted him higher and higher in search of a climax like no other. When he could not climb any higher, he stopped and for a moment that was perhaps an eternity, Magnus floated suspended in midair, in a state of complete connectedness as if his spirit had grown tendrils that reached to the universe and towards Alec. The glamor that concealed his warlock mark burned away and his eyes shone golden in the darkness. And then, he was falling back the ground in a torrent of pleasure and ecstasy, a sensation of vertigo tightening his stomach as he called Alec's name over and over. As he fell, Alec held him tightly as wave after wave of the most exquisite pleasure washed over Magnus, blurring his vision and making him dizzy.

When the last shivers run down his spine and he felt his spirit coming back to his body, Magnus mastered as much strength as he was able and slid down the couch until he was sitting astride on Alec's lap, his body trapped between the couch and Alec's strong body. He searched for Alec's eyes and when he found them, he saw in them an expression of wonderment and love.

"There you are warlock," Alec whispered as he looked into Magnus' unglamored eyes. "There is no need for glamor with me, no tonight, not ever." He then placed his hands on each side of Magnus' face and gently kissed each of Magnus' eyelids. Magnus felt that Alec was not just kissing his eyes but his very soul, and in his lips, the word warlock was not an insult or a derision, not a disgusted comment in his condition as a half-demon, but a term of adoration and reverence.

"Alexander, what are you doing to me?" Magnus asked, the words coming out between rapid and shallow breaths. With his fingers still entangled in Alec's hair, he looked once again into the deep brown of Alec's eyes, for just a moment before shifting his gaze down to Alec's glorious lips, those lips that just moments ago had taken him to the very gates of heaven. After a moment filled with the most exquisite anticipation, Magnus claimed those lips, invading Alec's mouth with a hunger that refused to abate.

Alec's hands rounded Magnus' behind as Alec pulled him even closer, and the feeling of the fabric of Alec's jeans against his naked skin and of Alec's desire clearly palpable even through the fabric gave Magnus such pleasure that he could not help gasping loudly. For a moment, he felt that he would lose the upper hand once again but quickly and with great effort he reigned in his self-control. Magnus continued his relentless assault on Alec's lips and relished in the indescribable sensation of the Shadowhunter surrendering to the ministrations of his lips.

He would have continued kissing Alec forever, but nakedness was the order of business and Magnus felt it was his duty to ensure that Alec followed that order. "Tsk, tsk," he said with a coy smile when his lips momentarily relinquished their claim on Alec's lips, "as much as I like how my shirt looks on you Alexander, I think it would look better off you." He began to undo the buttons on Alec's shirt, while his mouth continued to demand the full attention of Alec's mouth, and he smiled against Alec's lips when he heard the loud gasp with which Alec reacted to the sensation of their skins finally touching.

As Magnus took possession of his lips, Alec run fingers down Magnus' back leaving nail marks on the warlock's unblemished skin, as if the skin was unmarked territory and he its cartographer. Meanwhile, Magnus slowly slid his hands gently and slowly down Alec's chest and abdomen and with sinuous movements that rivalled Alec's earlier ones, he disposed of belt buckle, button and zipper in his attempt to free Alec of the remaining of his restrictive clothing. Neither of them would remember how, but in no time, there was not an inch of skin in either of their bodies that was not exposed and touching, not a single corner of their bodies that was not exposed and willing to be explored. As Alec maintained his strong hold on Magnus and supported the weight of his body on his crossed legs, Magnus was thankful beyond words for the physical strength and flexibility that the Angel had bestowed on the Nephilim.

In minutes, Alec was moving with increasing desperation against Magnus, holding on to Magnus as if he was an anchor without which Alec would fly away. With each movement, he possessed and offered, took and gave pleasure with equal amounts of greediness and generosity, and with each undulation of Alec's hips, Magnus felt like he was being carried on the crest of a wave about to break. As a new climax began to build in the very center of his being, he opened his eyes and looked upon the pleasure-filled face of the Shadowhunter.

"Look at me Alexander," Magnus demanded when he felt Alec's body shudder and tremble in anticipation of a powerful orgasm. "Look at me," he repeated, and Alec obeyed, and as he looked into Magnus' cat eyes, those eyes became beacons that guided Alec home. Magnus held on to Alec's shoulders as both their bodies started a dance that they had learned and had been perfecting since the first time they made love, a dance in which each knew the other's gestures and movements as if they were their own. As they built towards a shared climax that was both a conquer and a surrender, their eyes remained locked, Alec's eyes pools of amber in which Magnus felt he could swim forever, and Magnus' unglamored eyes, golden stars that illuminated Alec's path through the darkness. When each one knew that the other had reached his limit, together, they let go and their climaxes became waves crushing against one another, part of a torrent that lifted them and let them fall until eventually it carried them both to shore.

When the last of the tremors run through his body, Alec shifted position and carrying Magnus along brought them both to lay side by side on the carpet, Magnus arm resting across Alec's body and Alec's head leaning against Magnus' shoulder. With a flick of his fingers, Magnus willed the blanket that laid on the arm of the sofa to unfold and cover them. In a gesture meant to convey appreciation, Alec kissed Magnus' shoulder and sighed deeply and contentedly.

After a few minutes in which they both laid silent, the rising and falling of their chests slowly settling down, and their heartbeats gradually going back to normal, Alec turned on his side and propped himself on one elbow. "I love you Magnus," he said, not a thread of doubt or self-consciousness in his voice, "you must know that my heart belongs to you."

"As mine is yours Alexander," Magnus replied.

Alec smiled and then leaned and kissed Magnus, and Magnus knew that the night was far from over, for the kiss carried renewed desire and longing, desire and longing that seemed to have the power to reawake his own. He completely surrendered to the sensation of Alec's lips on him, and to the feel of Alec's hands drawing circles all over his skin, reawakening his desire, enticing him to even more burning passion. He began to run fingers up and down Alec's back and redrawing the lines his nails had made earlier, as his desire fueled new desperate explorations.

"Alexander," he whispered between shallow breaths a while later, the sensation of Alec's mouth on his neck, the feel of Alec's body moving against his own, and the sensation of the muscles of Alec's back under his hands, threatening to make him forget the words as soon as they formed in his mind, "I still want you so much that I feel my heart is going to explode."

Alec abandoned for a moment his kissing of Magnus's neck and looked at Magnus, his lips forming a naughty and mischievous smile. In a sinuous movement that was typical of Shadowhunters, Alec stood up and taking Magnus' hand pulled him to his feet. The glorious spectacle of Alec's naked body illuminated by the fire that still burned in the fireplace took Magnus' breath away. Alec closed the distance between them and kissed him once again, and, suddenly, breathing was no longer important or necessary. Without relinquishing his ownership of Magnus' lips, and with confident steps, Alec finally guided Magnus to the bed, and once there he leaned back against the mattress, the white sheets reflecting the flames from the fireplace providing the perfect background for Alec's gloriously naked body. Gently but determinately, Alec pulled Magnus to him.

"Show me how much you want me warlock," Alec whispered in Magnus' ear, his words a dare and a challenge and Magnus knew that, at that moment and perhaps forever, he was the luckiest man in the world.

Alec had told Magnus that he wished to break up in a thousand pieces in Magnus' arms and that night, Magnus fulfilled Alec's wish over and over. Alec did the same and with ever increasing passion repeatedly took Magnus to the very gates of heaven and beyond, until Magnus thought he had become an angel himself.

They made love as if the world was coming to an end and this night was all they had, as if no one and nothing else existed but the two of them in this room. Every time one of them thought the other had finally sated his desire, the other reached and with wild lips and unruly fingers offered and demanded with even more passion, and in no time, they were building up again, reaching for even higher peaks, even more intense ecstasies and more delicious surrenders. Magnus journeyed along every inch of Alec's skin, and Alec extracted ever possible sound of pleasure from Magnus, as each took and gave, possessed and offered in equal measure and without not even an ounce of avarice or restrain.

Hours later, when the night was at its darkest and his body was building up towards an even more powerful orgasm, just Magnus' hand in his anchoring him, Alec opened his eyes and met Magnus' astonishingly beautiful eyes glowing and calling to him through the darkness. Something in the power of those eyes awoke and unleashed something in Alec, a force, a power of his own that had been trapped in his chest clamoring for release.

If he had to describe the sensation, he would say that it felt as if an egg had cracked in the center of his being, in a place halfway between the scars in his chest and back, and a powerful force, like nothing he had ever felt before, finally broke free. As it unleashed, the force began to rush through his veins, carrying with it his very soul, searching and reaching with hundreds of tendrils towards Magnus.

At that moment, and as if the warlock was responding to the mysterious forces flowing through Alec, Magnus' chest expanded, and his back arched against the mattress. Magic began to pour out of him in golden lines that run along Magnus' veins, and out his fingers in a steady flow that entered Alec, surged through Alec's system until it reached the very center of Alec's being, that place where only the spirit resides. The sensation was indescribable and, if this had not been Magnus' magic invading Alec's body, I would have also been frightening. But instead of being afraid of it, Alec surrendered completely to the mystical experience and kept his eyes fixed on Magnus' eyes, completely oblivious to anything else going on around him, as those eyes finally guided him towards a climax that was not just physical, but also spiritual.

What Alec did not notice was that, longing for the gratification of seeing Alec come undone in his arms once again, Magnus had opened his eyes and looked at Alec at the precise moment in which something came alight in the center of Alec's chest. It was something that looked like a silver star, a star from which points silver tendrils extended and travelled along Alec's body, momentarily painting in silver the runes on the Shadowhunter's skin. When Alec opened his eyes and looked back at him, Magnus thought he saw quicksilver momentarily shinning in Alec's pupils.

As those silver tendrils reached Magnus, a surge of power, electric and magnetic, suddenly invaded him, searching and finally reaching even the most obscured corners of him. Abruptly and as if obeying an ancient call, Magnus' magic awoke and out of its own volition began to pour out of him, searching and reaching for the power emanating from Alec's chest. The sensation of magic meeting magic, of his powers coming in contact with the powers of another, was so indescribably pleasurable that Magnus gave up his attempt to contain the climax building within him.

Possessed by sensations neither of them could later describe, they both let go and finally surrendered to a shared climax was not only physical but also spiritual and magical and, as wave after wave of pleasure washed over them, their skins glowed, silver meeting gold, and hundreds of magic sparkles came to life in the places where their skins met, shooting out into the air, bouncing against the walls and breaking in thousands of tiny multicolor stars. Magnus experienced a brief moment of astonishment but the mysterious and indescribable sensations running though his body combined with the incredible feeling of his magic running free and unrestrained, erased all thoughts and took all willpower. He felt himself fall apart in as many tiny sparkles of magic as those shining all around them.

"I feel like my soul is growing wings Magnus," Alec whispered between gasps when he finally collapsed on top of Magnus a second later, the words barely holding their coherence, and Magnus thought that he could not have found better words to describe that had just happened. So instead of saying anything, he simple held the Shadowhunter as they both shuddered and trembled against one another and their souls reluctantly found the way back to their bodies. For minutes or perhaps hours, they laid in a tangle of arms, legs and magic tendrils, as their chests rose and fell, and their heartbeats drummed in their chests.

"I swear I just felt your magic enveloping my heart Magnus," Alec said once he found his voice and was able to formulate something that resembled a coherent thought.

"You felt it too?" Magnus asked, his still scrambled thoughts trying to organize themselves in his head. "How did you do that?"

"It wasn't me," Alec replied. "I thought it was you."

"I don't believe it was me, but if it was, I had no control over it," Magnus replied, puzzlement and concern chasing confusion away.

"Whatever it was, it was wonderful," Alec whispered. As Magnus held him and he rested his head on Magnus's chest, the warlock's heartbeat slowly lured him into a deep slumber.

Alec awoke a while later, and when he reached for Magnus, found his side of the bed empty. Momentarily disoriented, he lifted his head and looked around. "Magnus," he called, his voice hoarse and full of sleep.

"Here," came Magnus' voice from somewhere near the fire.

Shaking off the cobwebs of sleep, Alec swung his feet out of bed and went in search of his lover. He found him sitting on the floor in front of a newly stoked fire, the blanket that had covered them earlier wrapped around his shoulders, the orange glow of the fire reflecting on his skin and making him look like a gold statute. Alec approached and sat on the floor behind Magnus and stretched his legs on each side of the warlock. Removing the blanket from around Magnus' shoulder he wrapped it around his own so as to cover them both. He then wrapped his arms around Magnus, enticing him to lean back against his chest, the sensation of their skin touching warming and comforting. They sat like that for a while, their eyes fixed on the flames as they consumed the logs in the fireplace, and the sky outside their window slowly turned from black to dark blue.

"Did I do this to you Alexander?" Magnus asked a few minutes later half turning and placing his hand on Alec's chest, the scar responding to the touch with a faint silver glow.

Magnus had laid awake after Alec had fallen sleep, his arms wrapped around the Shadowhunter, his body keenly attuned to Alec's body as it slowly relaxed and Alec sank deeper and deeper into sleep. He still felt a faint energy gently vibrating in the spot in Alec's chest where earlier he had seen a silver mark glow in the darkness. As he stroked Alec's hair, he tried to make sense of what had just happened, of the forces that had mysteriously awoken his own magic in ways that no power had been able to do before.

When he was certain that Alec was deep asleep, he had enticed the Shadowhunter to turn so he could examine the mark on his chest, the eight-point star that had glowed with such power and intensity earlier but that now was slowly fading as if sinking back into Alec's skin. As he rested his hand on the mark, he had felt the power that emanated from it, a power that seemed to come alive at the contact with Magnus' magic.

"Did I do this to you?" he now repeated, his voice carrying a mixture of desperation and panic.

"What are you talking about?"

"You know what I am taking about Alexander." Magnus's voice sounded sharp and cut the silence of the room like knife. He then shifted his gaze from Alec's eyes down to his chest where his hand still rested, and Alec followed the movement with his own eyes.

"Nobody did this to me," Alec responded. "I came back from hell with this scar on me, but it does not hurt as much anymore, and Catarina said it is healing; that it in time it may disappear altogether." Alec was downplaying the situation because he did not want to worry Magnus by describing Catarina and Tessa's look of concern and surprise when they saw the scars.

"Oh, don't get me started," Magnus said, anger plainly evident on his voice. "I am going to have some serious words with my friends for not telling me what was happening. And, do not say that no one did this to you. I was the one who blasted you with a surge of demonic energy that hit you right here," he added pointing with his finger at the place in question.

"May I remind you that without that blast I would still be trapped in hell? And, if Tessa had not used her powers to pull me, I would still be floating in the ether." Alec's retort was a little bit more forceful than he had intended. "I am fine," he continued, bringing his tone down a few notches and imbuing his words with conviction. "Better than fine; I think something is changing in me, Magnus, the Seventh Circle changed me somehow." He had not made sense of what was happening to him until his lips formed the words, but as he heard himself speak, Alec knew that what he was saying was true. Something, some force he could not explain, was changing him from the inside out, perhaps altering somehow the very structure of his being. "But the change is not a bad one. I feel it and it is not bad. The scar will likely disappear in a few days and then everything will go back to normal," he added even though part of him was not certain that would the case.

"That is not a scar, Alec," Magnus said. "I don't know yet what it is, but it is much more than a scar. We have to find a way to get rid of it."

"No, we don't," Alec replied, his voice now the one to cut. For some reason he could not quite explain, he knew that he needed to let things follow their own course. "We are going to leave it alone and just wait."

"But Alexander," Magnus started to protest.

"Trust me Magnus, it is better to wait and see what happens." Alec smiled suggestively because he did not want Magnus to fret. He, after all, was not worried any more. In fact, he felt that whatever had been stuck in his chest had finally dislodged and, at least for now, he did not feel the pressure and tightness he had felt for the last few days. The sensation was liberating and, for the first time since he came back from the Seventh Circle, he felt his body getting stronger and his injuries healing. He could not explain why, but he knew that whatever was happening to him was not evil or sinister.

Magnus looked at him for a moment and then shook his head in a gesture of surrender, but Alec knew that the surrender was temporary. He had seen Magnus get obsessed with a mystery he could not quite unravel before, and he knew that he would not give up until he unraveled this mystery. For now, however, Alec was determined not to let the scar on his chest spoil their wonderful night together. So, he decided that at least for tonight, he would do all in this power to quiet any further protest and erase any concern from Magnus' mind.

Bringing a hand to the side of Magnus' face, Alec enticed Magnus to look back at him and when he did, he took possession once again of those lips that, he was sure, would one day be his perdition.

At first, Magnus' response to the kiss was reluctant, but Alec was not prepared to give up. He intensified his assault determined to bring Magnus to his way of thinking. He enticed Magnus' lips to part and let his tongue help in the convincing by inviting Magnus' tongue to play. Magnus relaxed against his body and Alec tighten his hold on Magnus pulling him closer as he run a hand up and down Magnus' chest and abdomen, and then slowly proceeded down in maddening and enticing new explorations.

"Alexander…" Magnus tried to protest some time later, but Alec was relentless and determined to give Magnus no respite.

"Shush," he said, his lips planting feather light kisses up and down Magnus' neck, "you are mine tonight warlock, and I am yours and that is all that matters." Alec knew he had won when Magnus lifted his arms and wrapped them around Alec's neck, opening his chest up, giving Alec's hands free access.

Magnus knew at that moment that he was lost, that there was no resistance possible, that Alec was a raging storm and he a flimsy vessel caught in the gale at the mercy of powerful waves and winds. Furthermore, his body responded to Alec's sensual and lustful ministrations with a will of its own, and his magic seemed to awake in him as if Alec was the master, not only of his body, but also of his powers. Soon they were moving together once again, wind and gale dancing with one another, building in energy, climbing new heights, surrendering to instincts that were as old as time itself.

When hours later the first light of the new morning finally found its way into Magnus and Alec's room, it found them wrapped in each other's arms, moving in unison, completely oblivious to their surroundings, to the singing of the birds, the sound of the ocean and the sun peeking above the mountain tops. As that first light illuminated their sweat covered skins, they each thought that the other was the most beautiful being they had ever laid eyes on, but the thought was brief, and it was gone as soon as it formed, overpowered by the incredible sensation of yet another climax. When they fell back on the bed for the last time, Alec's back resting against Magnus's chest, Magnus wrapped his arms around Alec and brought his hand up to the spot where he knew the mark was on his chest. He then gently kissed the spot in between Alec's shoulder blades where its sister reflected the morning light with a faint silver glow.

"I love you Alexander," he said for perhaps the hundredth time that night.

"I love you too Magnus," Alec replied as sleep carried them both off and their bodies finally surrendered to the most exquisite of exhaustions.

 **I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it…**


	16. Chapter 16 -Entanglements

**Entanglements**

The midday sun reached Magnus' pupils through his closed eyelids in soft hues of green and blue and ever so gently beckoned him back to the waking world. He inhaled deeply, stretched – oxygen simultaneously reaching muscles and brain – and finally, though still reluctantly, he opened his eyes, his pupils slowly adjusting to the light. As the cobwebs of sleep slowly cleared away and he became more aware of his surroundings, Magnus noticed that he was lying on his stomach and that, surprisingly, his head rested at the foot of the bed. Someone had covered him and as he inhaled deeply once again, the scent of soap, spices and something else he could never identify, but that were so completely Alec, invaded his senses.

He was alone in the bed and, when he lifted his head and looked around, he saw that there was no one else in the room either. Leisurely and unhurriedly, Magnus turned and gazed up through the skylight at the little pieces of blue sky visible between the tree brunches under which the cottage was sheltered. He stretched once more and realized that his body ached and pulled in the most delightful of ways, the aching filling his mind with the most exquisite memories: memories of Alec dragging fingers and nails down his back, Alec's teeth against his skin, Alec holding on to him with Shadowhunter strength. Other memories soon followed: Alec calling his name; Alec telling him that his heart belonged to Magnus; Alec's skin glowing silver in the darkness.

As if by instinct, his ears began to search for the sounds of Alec, filtering out the birdsongs, the ocean and the breeze until they finally homed in on Alec's soft and a-little-off-key whistling coming from downstairs. The sound called a smile to his lips – a smile that was just a little bit self-congratulatory – and he thought that Alec and his whistling fit perfectly in this house, that he was looking forward to Alec being part of the landscape and soundtrack of his life.

Magnus had never brought anyone, not even the people with whom he had shared his life before, to this secret hideaway, and sometimes decades had gone by between his own visits to the cottage. He had not even planned to bring Alec here the first time. It had been one of those spur-of-the-moment kinds of thing. This place was one of his most guarded secrets, his refuge when he needed a place to hide because he had gotten himself in trouble, needed time alone to work out a new spell or learn new magic, or, during sad times, lick his wounds and grieve. Yet, even the first time that Alec was here, Magnus had felt that the Shadowhunter, with his quiet and thoughtful demeanor, belonged; that this house so far away from the hustle and bustle of New York, so removed from their active lives, became a home when Alec occupied it.

As he laid in bed, his arms folded behind his head, Magnus thought that while he had known for some time that he was in love with Alec, he now understood that this love was the kind that, even for an immortal, came only once in a lifetime, the kind of love that completes one's life and makes one want to plan for two instead of one. The thought of loving in that way someone so mortal and ephemeral should have unsettled Magnus, but he was completely at ease with his feelings, as if a piece that had been missing in the puzzle of his life finally fit in place.

He let his mind wonder some more and his thoughts inevitably began to run through the events of the last few days, weeks and months. He thought that he was truly happy for the first time in a long time, perhaps happier than he had ever been before. Being with Alec was easy. Despite their different histories and the complicated relationship between their peoples, they got along and worked well together. Even during the crisis that had triggered their latest misadventure, neither of them had ever truly doubted their feelings for each other. Furthermore, from the very first time, being in love and making love with Alec had felt right. Unlike many of his previous relationships, being with Alec had never required comprise, submission or domination; being together had always been an act of mutual offering and mutual surrender.

He knew, of course, what many people thought of the kind of relationship him and Alec had. He had lived through times of deep bigotry, bigotry that turned cruel, murderous and even barbaric against people who did not look or did not conform to dominant ideas of morality and racial superiority, people who were seen as inferior, aberrations, immoral. He had been at the receiving end of those insults because of his ethnic background, his sexual identity and his condition as a warlock. Even if human society was nowadays more accepting of two men loving one another, homophobia was still rampant. In fact, Magnus suspected that homophobia might even be more dangerous and violent now because it had been pushed underground. The Nephilim, with their closed, secretive and insular society, their glamored lives and their determination to set themselves apart as a superior species were not free from the sins of superiority, bigotry and prejudice. Furthermore, they were rather slow in keeping up with the pace of mundane or even Downworld openness. The Angel's chosen were particularly afflicted by prejudice, not only against same-sex relationships but also, and most importantly, against the Downworld.

Yet, Alec had chosen to be with him, or rather, they had chosen to be with each other, and as the events of the last few weeks had demonstrated, they had gone to great lengths for one another. It had not been easy for either of them, even if for different reasons. Alec had had to go against thousands of years of traditions, prejudice and expectations, and he, Magnus, had had to overcome his own painful history with the Nephilim, some of it even involving the Lightwood family. Magnus had had to set aside centuries of resentment, abuse and the discrimination he had suffered at the hands of the Nephilim. But how not to jump if Alec had extended his hand to catch him? How not to defy prejudice and his own reluctance when Alec had looked at him with such awe, admiration and acceptance? How not to meet Alec halfway when Alec was the one to take the first step? Yes, he thought, this relationship felt right, as if after decades of wandering in the darkness, unsure of which direction his destiny would take him, his life finally made sense with Alec in it.

However, as his mind eventually came back to the previous night, something started to nag at Magnus, a mystery that needed solving. For, while, since the first time, they had always enjoyed incredible closeness and intimacy, for one moment last night, Alec had touched Magnus in ways he could not describe or explain, in ways that were more intense and more intimate than anything he had ever felt. At that moment in which the scars in Alec's chest and back glowed, Magnus had felt what he could only describe as tendrils, filaments or wisps of energy emerging from Alec and reaching towards him, touching and caressing every single cell in his body and soul. Every nerve-ending and sensory receptor in Magnus had come alive at once and, disconcertingly, his magic had awakened of its own accord as if it was answering Alec's command. Magnus' magic had responded to the call and, as it reached deep inside Alec, Magnus had felt like his magic was getting entangled with Alec's Nephilim life force.

Magic always required a certain amount of coercion – that is why it was called a power – because it required warlocks to bend the forces of nature to their will in order to extract the strength they needed to create a potion or perform a spell, incantation or summon. Those forces of nature always resisted. Magnus was, by all accounts, a powerful warlock, and, he had always prided himself on his exceptional capacity to master his powers, to control and even dominate the demonic part of him in order to master the forces that created and sustained magic. However, last night, during that indescribably intense and intimate moment, Magnus had had no control and there had not been any need for coercion, resistance or struggle.

The sensations, the sensory overload and the loss of control should have been overwhelming and terrifying. But instead, Magnus had felt entirely at ease, utterly in synergy and at peace with the forces around him and with the demonic and the human parts of him. He had felt that he was part of an invisible web that tied him to Alec's Nephilim energy, and to all energy around them. It was as if the mysterious forces emanating from Alec were guiding him into the depth of a tranquil lake made all of magic, and in which he and Alec floated in a state of completely intertwinement, as if their bodies, spirits and souls were one with each other and with nature.

Magnus was not complaining. He had never experienced such intense sensations, or that kind of intimacy and synergism. Just thinking about it now, gave him goosebumps and caused his magic to stir and crave once again for that state of bliss. But his rational self could not help wondering what had caused the phenomenon, what was happening to Alec and how much their experiences in the Seventh Circle were to blame. After all, nothing that came from that place should be taken lightly, not matter how positive it seemed at first sight. His father's realm was a dangerous place, especially for a Nephilim. Furthermore, Magnus knew his father too well and Asmodeus never gave anything in exchange for nothing. He needed to unravel this mystery, investigate the effects that a journey to hell might have on a Nephilim. He certainly needed to speak with Catarina and Tessa, find out what they knew and if they could help.

A sound from the kitchen irrupted in his reflection and the certitude of Alec's presence recalled Magnus to the here and now. The idea of wrapping his arms around the Shadowhunter, breathe in his scent and kiss those sensual lips, finally convinced him to put his concerns aside at least for the moment. He did not want to worry Alec until he, Magnus, knew more. Besides, at least for now, Alec seemed fine, he had said so himself. Yes, Magnus thought, he would call Tessa and Catarina at the first opportunity, but for now, his lover was downstairs, likely waiting for him.

Magnus got up and, after quickly – and with the assistance of a simple spell – making the bed with fresh and crisp white sheets, he headed for the bathroom. He looked at his reflection in the mirror and the twinkle that seemed to have found permanent residence in his eyes confirmed once again that he was a fool in love. He shifted his gaze down to his chest and then, turning, he examined the reflection of his back in the mirror, and a smile lifted the corners of his lips. As he had suspected, faint and some not-so-faint scratches crisscrossed his chest and back. Magnus thought of using a quick healing spell to take care of them but then reconsidered; for why get rid of the marks left by a night he never wanted to forget? So instead, he brushed his teeth, washed his face and run wet fingers through his hair, just enough to bring some order to his unruly hairstyle. After making sure he was sufficiently presentable, he put on silk pajama bottoms and a matching robe – both in a deep blue he thought would look wonderful against Alec's skin – and headed downstairs in search of Alec.

He found him in the kitchen, barefooted and wearing his frayed grey t-shirt over a pair of black boxer briefs that hugged his hips perfectly and temptingly. As he descended the stairs, Magnus saw Alec put something in the oven and then turn towards the coffee maker on the counter, apparently oblivious to Magnus' ogling. Magnus thought that beautiful and striking were not words that did justice to the way Alec looked, with his hair in disarray reflecting the sunlight coming in through the windows, his long legs and his perfectly proportionate body, a body that, as Magnus had confirmed once again last night, seemed to have been made, not only for fighting, but also for loving.

"Good morning Alexander," Magnus quietly said when he approached Alec from behind and wrapped his arms around him, the sensation of Alec's muscular back against his own chest defying any attempts at description.

"Good morning Magnus, you are up," Alec said his body immediately and easily relaxing against Magnus, "did you sleep well?"

"During those short intervals that you allowed me to sleep, I did," Magnus replied with a coy smile.

"When I allowed you to sleep?" Alec asked in a tone of feigned outrage, his face turning to look at Magnus, the force of those eyes making Magnus skip a heartbeat. "I think we may have different versions of last night Magnus."

Magnus marvelled at how wonderful his name sounded in Alec's lips, perhaps as wonderful as when Alec called him warlock in the intimacy of their bed. But then Alec smiled seductively, and that smile called for Magnus's lips, and all thoughts went up in smoke. Answering the call, Magnus leaned in and kissed Alec gently.

"Let's agree to disagree, shall we?" Magnus softly said once their lips parted. But then Alec turned, leaned against the counter and, pulling him closer, wrapped his arms firmly, yet also gently, around his waist, and Magnus thought that he would agree to anything Alec said as long as Alec continued holding him and looking at him in the way he was doing now.

"Did I tire you out Magnus?" Alec asked, and his smile and the low tone of his voice were just the right combination of innocent and seductive. "Was I too demanding?"

"I think I should be the one asking that question," Magnus replied as he tried to control the goosebumps that threatened to cover every inch of his skin. "May I remind you that Catarina threatened me with all kinds of nasty consequences if I didn't make sure you rested. How are you feeling Alexander?" he then asked, his smile fading into an expression that was a little bit more serious. Magnus rested his hand against Alec's chest feeling for that mysterious mark that last night had triggered something that Magnus could still not explain or fathom.

"I feel great," Alec replied. "Really," he added in response to Magnus' doubtful expression. "I feel stronger than I have felt in days and the pressure that I felt on my chest yesterday is almost gone."

"Do you do remember what happened last night?" Magnus asked tentatively, unable to contain the concern that had irrupted in his thoughts earlier, yet not wanting to alarm Alec.

"I remember every second of it," Alec whispered in Magnus' ear, and Magnus lost the battle against the goosebumps and his magic stirred at the sound of those words. "You were holding out on me Magnus. Whatever you did, however you did it, it was so intense that I can't even describe it. You never told me that being with you could feel like that."

"That has never happened to me before, Alexander, never. Whatever happened, it was not me, or rather it was not just me."

"But I saw the magic flowing out of you," Alec argued. "I felt it enter and running through me, healing me, releasing the pressure in my chest, and, for a moment, I felt transformed somehow. I felt that I was becoming more than what I am. Does that make sense? It was so intense that the hairs in my arms stand on end just thinking about it."

"I can relate to that," Magnus added, a smile lifting the corners of his mouth. "But that was not just my magic, Alexander. The scar on your chest had something to do with it. What if whatever is happening has to do with the energy I used to free you from the Seventh Circle? We need to find out what caused it, don't you think?"

"Can we not just enjoy this for a while, Magnus, this peace, this time without The Clave, demons, mysterious forces, and everything else that constantly occupies our lives? Can we not leave the rational explanations for when we go home?" Alec asked. "We have gone through so much; can we not just take this time as a blessing?"

"I don't know Alexander," Magnus replied with a deep sigh, "I think we should investigate some more."

Alec sighed and smiled. "Since I know I cannot stop you or convince you to leave it alone…," Alec began to say but before finishing the sentence, he leaned in and kissed Magnus. "Can I just ask that you don't get too obsessed? As I said, I feel great and I don't feel that what happened last night was sinister. In fact," he added, and he leaned in closer again to whisper in Magnus' ear, "I think it was unforgettable, even divine." He followed the words with a gentle and very enticing bite to Magnus' earlobe, a bite that made Magnus lose his train of thoughts. Images of wisps of silver magic and memories of the incredible sensations of the night before began to push away all rational thought.

"I guess we can wait until we go back to New York," Magnus said with sigh, his body automatically melting against Alec's strong body.

Before Magnus could say anything else, Alec was simultaneously kissing him and loosening the knot on the belt of his robe. A moment later, Alec's hands were going on a new recognizant mission up and down Magnus' back, and his mouth was doing a delightful dance along his neck. The sensation of Alec's body awakening against his own finally convinced Magnus that, at least for now, he could postpone the asking of questions. And then, they were kissing, completely oblivious to their surroundings, completely engrossed in the feel of each other's lips and bodies, and the way in which they each anticipated and responded to the other's needs and demands.

Alec's hands were slowly making their way under the waistband of Magnus' pajamas, pulling him closer and caressing him with unmatched dexterity when a beeping sound rudely irrupted in their private moment. "Brunch is ready, warlock," Alec informed him, his breathing shallow, his forehead leaning against Magnus'. "We should get some food in you and build up your strength. I don't want you to faint on me."

"I am an all-powerful warlock, Shadowhunter, and you have stamina runes, I don't think strength is an issue," Magnus said, and then leaned in for another passionate kiss. However, he had to acknowledge that whatever Alec had baked smelled delicious and that his stomach was complaining of hunger and his brain was suffering from coffee deprivation. "Let's eat," he finally said after another minute of slow and sensual kissing, "or Catarina will really have my hide if you faint from hunger,".

They reluctantly separated and while Alec made and served coffee, Magnus set dishes and food on the kitchen counter: fruit, cheese, bread and the frittata that Alec had prepared. The food was so delicious, filling and sensual and they were in such as state of arousal that the meal became part of their lovemaking, a foreplay full of promising flirtations, auspicious caresses and stolen kisses. The perfect preamble for an afternoon of exquisite pleasures. They whispered little sweet somethings in each other's ears. They laughed and yearningly looked into each other's eyes with a desire that kept building and building until their skins were covered in goosebumps, their senses were full of each other's scents, and their minds were drunk with the most lustful thoughts.

"Don't do that," Magnus told Alec, when Alec placed a blueberry in Magnus' mouth a while later.

"Do what?" Alec asked, and his tone was the perfect imitation of innocence.

"You know what," Magnus responded, his voice heavy with desire. "If you keep biting your lower lip like that, I will not be accountable for what I might do to you on this very counter."

"Is that a promise?" Alec replied and bit his lip once again, and Magnus grabbed him by the front of his t-shirt and pulled him closer, taking possession of the offending lips, officially putting an end to the meal.

The night before, and despite having been apart for so long, they had taken their time and had made love slowly and without rush, rejoicing in the process of recognizing and reclaiming each other's bodies once again. That had not necessarily been Magnus' doing and a few times, specially at the beginning, Alec had restrained Magnus' unruly impulses. Today, however, there seemed to be no need for restrain and Alec quickly surrendered to Magnus' overwhelming desire. Instinct pushed aside all rational thought or attempt at self-control, and a powerful need for release took over them with surprising force.

In seconds, Magnus was pulling Alec towards the sofa, kissing him at the same time that he hastily helped off his t-shirt and underwear. And then, he pushed him with a little bit more strength than necessary down on the couch and climbed on top of him. All the while, he continued kissing him and caressing him with the need and hunger of a starving man. Meanwhile, Alec's hands resumed their exploration past the waistband of Magnus' pajamas, rounding his behind and pulling him closer and closer until Magnus thought there was no possible way to tell where one ended and the other began, until they had fused together and become one, one organism, one life moving towards the same goal.

Their bodies began to move together, offering and taking, their minds unable to keep up with their instincts, their lips kissing and whispering words of love and wanting that acquired the quality of incantations. When Alec's body shuddered and quaked in that exquisite way that Magnus had learned to recognize as the moment in which his lover surrendered to a climax he could no longer contain, he too let go and finally jumped into the abyss, his chest opened, his heart exposed to the four winds. For a moment or an hour – neither of them knew – they froze in place, still and unable to move, their bodies transformed into a single connected muscle before they were washed away by the most exquisite wave and they collapsed. Magnus rested his head on Alec's shoulder, his face turned towards that sweet spot where neck met shoulder, and Alec wrapped his arms around Magnus, as if holding on for dear life.

"I like how this fabric feels on you," Alec whispered when he recovered his voice sometime later, "it is soft and sexy, just like you. It makes me think of a gift that is just for me to unwrap." When Magnus gave him an inquisitorial look, Alec gestured to the silk robe Magnus was still wearing and run a hand down and under the waistband of Magnus' pajama bottoms which were barely holding on to Magnus' hips.

Magnus looked down at himself and laughed. "I guess I was in a rush," he said, the memory of being naked while Alec remained fully dressed the night before adding to the seductiveness and sinfulness of the moment.

"I guess we are even now," Alec whispered as if he had read Magnus' mind. "But I think we should find a reason to disrobe you soon."

"Aren't you tired Alexander? You were in death's doorsteps just a few days ago."

"Of making love with you? Never," Alec replied. "All you have to do is touch me, warlock, and I forget everything; all pain and tiredness gone. That is the kind of power you have over me." Alec sighed deeply and tighten his hold on Magnus and for a while they laid entangled in a knot of arms and legs.

After a few minutes, Magnus flicked his fingers and with a wave of his hand send a flow of magic into the air. At that moment, water started running somewhere upstairs, the faint scent of sandalwood eventually reaching them. Slowly and gently disentangling himself from Alec, Magnus stood up and, reaching for Alec's hand, pulled him to his feet.

"Come Alexander," he said. He then slowly guided Alec up the stairs, pausing a couple of times along the way, first so Magnus could stand a step higher than Alec and kiss him, and then so Alec could push Magnus against the banister to return the gesture. When they finally got to their bedroom, Magnus pulled Alec towards the bathroom, and as he did, he congratulated himself for having had the foresight of installing an extra-large Japanese bathtub the last time he renovated his bathroom.

Alec sat on the edge of the tub, the sunlight filtering through the panoramic window behind him reflecting on his skin and hair and making his eyes shine like pools of dark honey. He pulled Magnus to him, and with as gentle movements as the night before, he began draw a path of kisses along Magnus' skin starting at the hollow of his neck, while slowly peeling off Magnus' silk robe and pajama bottoms.

"I am sorry I scratched you Magnus," Alec said kissing one of the scratches on Magnus' chest, and the look of dismay in his eyes made Magnus regret not having used that healing spell.

"It is nothing," Magnus replied. "I also scratched you," he added gesturing to a similar injury in Alec's shoulder.

Alec looked in the direction Magnus was pointing and smiled. "I guess we were both a little distracted," he whispered in Magnus's ear and then followed with a gentle bite to his earlobe. "You did drive me a little crazy last night. I am not even sure I was in control of myself at times."

"You and I both," Magnus replied, as he searched for Alec's eyes. When their eyes met, Magnus shifted his gaze down to Alec's lips and after a moment of exquisite anticipation, he reasserted his ownership of those lips. Alec surrendered to the kiss and then his hands were exploring once again Magnus' bare skin while Magnus' fingers were running through Alec's hair. When Magnus rested his hand against Alec's cheek, Alec turned and kissed the inside of his wrist and the gesture was so gentle and so loving that Magnus' heart melted.

"You are so beautiful that you take my breath away," Alec whispered, and his words and his eyes were so full of honesty that they had the power of erasing all memory of those times when other Nephilim had looked at Magnus with scorn, disgust or disdain. At that moment, Magnus felt that Alec's words were remaking him into a new and better being, a being without darkness in him. Magnus' reply was a gentle kiss on Alec's forehead. But the kissed quickly turned passionate as Magnus' lips progressed down Alec's face until they reached Alec's lips once again. And as if by magic, Alec and Magnus became fire and flames once more, their thoughts and emotions entangled together, and for the remaining of the afternoon, that bathroom and that bedroom became their whole world, a world of their own making in which time had no meaning and only they existed.

They were in the bathtub a long time later, Magnus' back against Alec's chest, his head leaning back against the Shadowhunter's shoulder. Magnus was relishing in the protective feel of Alec's arms around him, the warm water that covered them, and the way in which Alec was running a sponge lathered in sandalwood soap along his chest and abdomen. The scent together with the feel of Alec's body against his own were making Magnus feel a little inebriated.

"Does this mean we are in a relationship again Magnus?" Alec softly asked.

"And here I thought we were going for casual sex and a one-night stand," Magnus replied turning to look at Alec with a playful smile.

"One-night stand? Casual sex? Really Magnus?" Alec replied, his smile equally playful. "I don't think we could ever have just sex, and, as I think we have proven today, one night will never be enough for us." Alec leaned in and tenderly kissed Magnus, the scent of sandalwood adding to the sensuality of the contact. "I give you my most solemn oath, Magnus," he added once their lips parted, his tone no longer playful, "that I will never again do anything that may cause you to doubt my faithfulness. You do know that Nephilim oaths are sacred."

Magnus looked into the eyes of this fascinating creature that had so quietly and unassumingly walked into his life and made himself at home in it. There was no a thread of doubt or hesitation in those eyes and Magnus knew that Alec's oath was unbreakable, that with those simple words, Alec was offering his life to Magnus. The gesture caused a sensation of warmth to run through Magnus' body and his heart suddenly felt like it was made of melting chocolate.

"I have a better idea," Magnus said, and he had to swallow in order to push down the emotions that were making it hard to speak. "What if you moved in?"

As soon as the words left his mouth, Magnus felt that they were finally coming full circle, that they were finally ready to move on and leave behind the childish things from the past. He then looked at Alec and thought that if he had a camera, he would have recorded Alec's expression to keep it for all eternity as a perfect study in surprise. For Alec did a double take, dropped the sponge with which he had been washing Magnus, and his eyes opened wide with what could only be described as astonishment.

"But Magnus, I thought you were not ready to move in together yet," Alec replied when he finally recovered this capacity for speech.

"I was ready," Magnus stated, his voice full of conviction. "I was ready even before you asked, but the fact that I felt ready to jump into a life with you, a Shadowhunter no less, scared me."

By way of an answer, Alec brought his hand to the side of Magnus' face and leaning in, kissed him, the kiss passionate and completely unguarded. "I give you my word," he said when he finally recovered tenure of his mouth, "that you will never regret trusting me with your heart Magnus," and at that moment, Magnus believed Alec completely.

"My heart is exploding, Magnus," Alec exclaimed hours later, his eyes locked on Magnus' eyes, quicksilver flooding his pupils and reflecting the light from the setting sun in ways that seemed to capture sunlight in ice.

They had finally made it to the bed and had spent the last few hours between white sheets, playing and laughing with puppy-like unselfconsciousness, curiosity and desire. But then, a few minutes ago, Magnus had felt a sudden change in the air around them, as if it had become electrically charged. The tone and feel of their lovemaking had changed then, becoming stronger, deeper and more intense, and there were no longer laughs or words, but just the incredible sensation of harmoniously moving with someone whose body and soul you knew as well as your own.

This time when he looked down and saw the mark on Alec's chest glow with silvery shine, Magnus was prepared. Rather than trying to control the effects of that mysterious force that had begun to flow from Alec, he gave free rein to his own magic, so it could go in search of the sensations Magnus had been craving as much as Alec had. Magnus reached with his powers deep into that mark and then deeper still until he thought he felt Alec's heartbeats in the very center of his own being. As he did, Magnus brought down his own barriers and defenses and welcomed the sensations of that mysterious power that touched his body and soul with cool silvery fingers.

Alec closed his eyes and relinquished his own self-control and Magnus did the same, and as the energy flowing from Alec entered Magnus, and as Magnus' magic invaded Alec, the most incredible and indescribable sensations invaded them. It was as if silver and gold, ice and fire, ocean and lava were coming into contact in an explosive collision that made Alec and Magnus feel that they were disintegrating into millions of stars that for an infinite moment floated in the air, outside history and time. As they surrendered, their orgasm was not just physical or individual, but a shared spiritual, physical and magical experience.

Completely overcome and feeling like his joints had become disarticulated, Magnus collapsed on top of Alec, and Alec gathered him in his arms, holding him while the remnants of whatever power they had conjured up run through their veins. As his own heartbeat slowly went back to normal and his breathing settled, Alec whispered loving words in Magnus' ear, telling him how much he loved him, how beautiful he looked with the setting sun illuminating his skin, how much he wanted to hold on to him forever and never let him go.

"Alexander," Magnus said when his breathing settled enough for him to form the words. "I feel like I just died and came back to life."

"A truly religious experience then," Alec whispered and then chuckled.

An exquisite sensation of exhaustion and satedness began to take over them, and soon they began to drift into a deep sleep, the drumming of Alec's heartbeat in his ear a lullaby that quieted, at least for the moment, all of Magnus' thoughts and apprehensions; the feel of Magnus' strong body on him a blanket that surrounded Alec in soothing security.

After lunch the following day, Alec announced that he was feeling strong enough to go for a run. Magnus looked at him with a dubious expression but then decided that Alec knew his own limits better than anyone, and that if he said he was fine, who was he to doubt him? Besides, it was likely that Alec was needing some space and time alone after days of being cooped up.

"I am going to work on a translation while you do that," Magnus said as he watched Alec put on a pair of Magnus' running shoes which size Magnus had to adjust to fit Alec's bigger feet. He then watched as Alec set off down the stairs that led to the ground.

In minutes, Alec was running along the trail, rejoicing in the sensation of fresh air and the scent of wet soil and ocean entering his lungs. The last time he had run was back in Idris, the day that Catarina sent him the fire message telling that Magnus was in trouble, and Alec's heart had been heavy with sadness and his mind crowded with thoughts of how much he missed Magnus. Today, however, his mind was quiet, and his feelings were at ease, all the dark thoughts and fears from the last few weeks gone. Soon, his body was feeling the exertion that was likely the result of the lingering effects of his injuries, and of the last couple of days in which he and Magnus had made love almost without stop. The sensation was not uncomfortable, but as sweat began to cover his forehead and back, Alec began to regret having forgotten on the kitchen counter the bottle of water he had planned to bring. Still, he pushed on, his mind entering into that state of meditation that always made running such a relaxing and rewarding experience.

He eventually reached the beach he and Magnus had stopped at during their previous excursions and as he bent down to rest his hands on his knees and catch his breath, he noticed that he had not forgotten the water bottle. He brought it to his lips and the coolness of the liquid running down his throat eased the exhaustion and the faint burning on his chest. He thought, not for the first time, that he could live forever among these ancient trees, majestic mountains and tranquil waters, that he would not mind spending the rest of his life listening to the birds and watching the occasional whales that came to swim in this remote cove. Yes, he thought, he could live here, only Magnus for company. The thought was surprising, even if not new, for he had never spent any considerable amount of time in nature. He was a city man, and he was a Shadowhunter, and Shadowhunters, especially those serving in Institutes, were not the kind that craved quiet life.

At an easy pace, Alec began to make his way back to the house, the thought of Magnus sitting at the kitchen counter, his eyes on the manuscript, calling and guiding him home. Yet, when the entered the house, Magnus was nowhere to be seen and the manuscript laid forgotten on the counter. "Magnus?" Alec called, and when he received no answer, he sharpened his hearing and began to search for the sounds of his boyfriend. A moment later, he heard murmurs coming from Magnus' office.

Alec had not ventured again to that part of the house since the day that Tessa helped him to Magnus' office, so he could call Celestina Rays and blackmail her in order to ensure Magnus and Catarina's release. He now quietly opened the French doors that stood to one side of the living room and that led to the part of the house that contained two small guest bedrooms, a bathroom and Magnus' office. As he went along, Magnus' voice became clearer and then Tessa and Catarina's voices also joined in. Magnus was obviously on a videoconference with the two warlocks. Odd, thought Alec, his heart suddenly skipping a beat; Magnus had told him that communications between the cottage and the outside world should only be attempted in cases of emergency. Further, the urgency and concern in Magnus' voice told him that this call qualified as an emergency. For a reason he could not explain, Alec approached the door quietly and stealthily, not wanting to alert Magnus of his presence until he had a better sense of what was happening.

"Are you certain that is what is happening to Alec?" Magnus was asking.

"I cannot think of any other explanation for the symptoms you describe," Tessa replied, her soothing tone a contrast to Magnus' concerned one.

"I felt the power in my own magic when I touched that scar, Magnus," Catarina added. "It was very strong and unmistakable. I have to agree with Tessa on this."

"But is this a permanent condition? Will it go away?" Magnus asked, and Alec heard him shifting in his seat, another telltale of Magnus' state of agitation.

"It might go away," Tessa replied, her tone reassuring. "We just have to wait and see. But if it doesn't go away, Alec will adjust, I am sure of it."

"I must do something," Magnus stated, and his voice could not sound more desperate. "This is my fault. I have to find a solution, perhaps try to summon my father or another demon to force them to give me a cure."

"Magnus," Catarina interrupted Magnus' desperate ranting, "the best thing is to wait and see. Does Alec have any idea about what is happening?"

"I don't know. He appears unconcerned, though he could be trying to not alarm me. But then again, it has only been a couple of incidents." Alec could almost hear the wheels turning in Magnus' head as he run multiple scenarios.

"You may want to speak to him," Tessa suggested. "Ask him how he feels and what he thinks."

"He has gone through so much because of me," Magnus replied. "I cannot worry him right now, especially when he is starting to feel like himself again."

"I don't know if it is a good idea to keep this from Alec," Catarina said. "You should talk to him, at least share your concerns with him."

"I will think about it," Magnus stated. "In the meantime, we must keep looking for an explanation and a solution."

"I am sure of one thing though," Tessa added, "we need to give his Nephilim system the opportunity to deal with whatever is happening. He is strong; he will pull through. Trust me Magnus, I am speaking from experience."

Alec turned away from the door once he heard Magnus say good bye to his friends, and quietly made his way back to the living room. By the time he reached the kitchen and sat at the counter, he had made the decision to keep to himself whatever was going on with his body, to push that energy that seemed to be singing in his veins deep inside himself along with that scar that, for whatever reason, caused Magnus so much apprehension. When Magnus came back to the kitchen a few minutes later, Alec welcomed him with a completely carefree smile, and Magnus replied with a similar gesture. Neither of them mentioned the scar on Alec's chest or the power it exerted again, and Magnus never spoke of his phone call with his friends.

That evening, Catarina sent Alec a fire message announcing that, in her opinion, he was ready to return to duty. When Magnus came downstairs the following morning, he found Alec out on the terrace, wearing his Shadowhunter clothes, his gaze lost in the distance. The morning was quiet and dark clouds announced impending rain and seeing Alec there leaning against the banister, Magnus thought that the sky was about to cry because of their impending departure.

They had spent the previous evening tidying up the house, picking up the books they had been reading, putting away dishes that would not get used again for who knew how long. After a quiet candlelight dinner, Alec had stood and reached for Magnus' hand and had quietly guided him upstairs to their bed and to their last night of making love by the sounds of the ocean and the wind.

"Ready to go home Alexander?" Magnus now asked as he came to stand beside Alec and with his eyes followed in the direction of the Shadowhunter's gaze.

"Are you ready?" Alec asked by way of an answer.

"As ready as I will ever be," Magnus replied trying to keep his tone light. "I do have work to do once I get home. I have to make room in my closet for someone's clothes."

Alec smiled and turned to look at Magnus, and Magnus, anticipating the move, leaned in and kissed him, the kiss gentle and tender.

"I hope you will bring me back here for another visit sometime," Alec said. "I am going to miss this house."

"If you play your cards right…" Magnus started to say, but then he saw a look of regret or perhaps sadness pass across Alec's eyes that made him suspect that Alec was not as enthusiastic about going back as he had anticipated. "Aren't you missing home Alexander?" he asked after a pause.

"It is funny really," Alec stated, "I have been so caught up with everything that happened that I have not given much thought to the fact that I have not been at the New York Institute in over six weeks. This is the longest I have ever been away from home. Things got so crazy and for a while I was not feeling well that I have not had the chance to think about work much."

Being a Shadowhunter had been all that Alec had thought about since he was a child. It had been his whole purpose in life and not a day had gone by that he had not thought about, gone on, or reported on missions. He had never had much of a personal life; Shadowhunters had no hobbies or interests outside of their angelic obligations, and their sense of duty was drilled into them since childhood. Yet in the last few days he had gotten a glimpse of a different life, or rather of a different setting for his life, away from the business of the Institute and the demands of a war against dark forces which threat never seemed to abate. Being just with Magnus and so far away from all that was familiar to him had gotten him thinking about what it would be like to live an ordinary life. Yet, he knew that such thoughts were futile; duty was calling to him, and he would answer as it was expected.

"I have a gift for you," Magnus said, irrupting in Alec's gloomy thoughts. He then lifted his fisted hand and opened it. Alec looked down and saw a set of rings on Magnus' palm, heavy, sturdy and beautifully crafted. The rings were actually made of two separate parts: a wider and sturdy silver band surrounded by a thinner band that moved around the wider one. The spinning inset was made of intertwined and interlocking threads of gold and silver forming an unbreakable bond. "I know you are not much for wearing jewelry, Alexander, but I thought you might consider wearing this ring."

"Magnus…" Alec started to say but then seemed to be lost for words, so instead, he leaned in and kissed Magnus. Magnus thought that he could hear Alec's rapid heartbeat and suspected that Alec could also hear his.

"They are magic," Magnus explained, gathering in his emotions and picking the ring that he had made for Alec. He turned it, so Alec could see the inscription inside. "To come to thee and be thy love," it read in Magnus' neat penmanship.

"It is a take on Sr. Walter Raleigh's old poem," Magnus continued. "Both rings have the same inscription, which is also an incantation. The rings are linked, you see, like twins. If you want me to know that you are thinking of me, you just have to give the top part – the one with the silver and gold design – half a turn. But if you are ever in danger and need me, you rotate it all the way around, and no matter where I am I will sense your call, and no matter where you are, I will find you."

"They are beautiful Magnus, but magic objects like these are very rare and valuable," Alec responded, "Are you sure you want me to have it?" Magnus thought that Alec's words contained more emotions than they could express

"I wouldn't be offering it to you if I didn't," Magnus responded.

"Is this the warlock's equivalent to a tracking devise?" Alec asked trying to imbue lightness into the tone. "Does yours work in the same way?"

"Yes," Magnus replied. "If I am ever in danger and in need of a Shadowhunter – which I doubt will ever happened – I give my ring and turn, and you will be able to use yours to open a portal to wherever I am."

Magnus had spent the last few days working on the rings whenever he had a chance, using some of his rarest and most potent potions and ingredients, as well as some of his most secret, ancient and powerful spells to bestow on the metals the power to act as a beacon between him and Alec. "Would you wear it?" he now asked. "I promise not to use mine for booty calls."

"Oh, that's too bad," Alec teased him. "Of course, I will wear it," he added and picking up the ring that was meant for Magnus, slid it down Magnus' finger. Magnus then did the same with Alec's ring. "Does this mean that there is a chance that you might agree to marry me one day Magnus?"

"Wow, not too fast Shadowhunter. We just went from casual sex to moving in together, don't push your luck."

Alec rested his hand on the side of Magnus' face, the feeling of the ring cool against Magnus' skin. "I love you Magnus," he whispered and now the smile was completely unguarded and free from the wistfulness Magnus had seen before. He then leaned closer and kissed Magnus, and the kiss was passionate, tender and full of promises, the perfect start for the next stage of their lives together.

Magnus and Alec portalled home a few minutes later, back to their lives and the fights, missions and struggles that were a daily part of the lives of a Shadowhunter and a warlock in a city like New York. As Alec stepped through the portal, he concentrated all his willpower in controlling the pressure building up in his chest and in pushing the scars deep into his skin, resolute to keep the promise he had made the afternoon he listened in on Magnus, Tessa and Catarina's conversation, determined to not tamper with the joy of starting a life with the man he loved.

Neither Magnus nor Alec would learn until weeks later the dangerous consequences of Alec's decision to hide the effects of that mark, and of Magnus' choice not to speak openly with his boyfriend about his suspicions and fears. Neither of them knew then that Asmodeus' hatred would soon rear its ugly head once again.

 **I wrote this chapter thinking about what it might feel like to make love to a magic-maker. I am not sure the writing does justice to my imagination. I am sure the chapter could still use some more work.**


	17. Chapter 17 -To Come to Thee

**To Come to Thee and Be Thy Love**

"You are such a distraction Alexander," Magnus said as he tried to catch his breath and stop his heart from jumping out of his chest. His forehead rested against Alec's and his fingers were entangled in his hair. He could also hear and see the Shadowhunter's efforts to settle his own breathing and heartbeat.

"A good distraction, I hope," Alec replied with a smile that tried to be apologetic but that came out smug instead.

"Yes, but how am I going to get any work done if you keep messing up my work space?"

Alec had one arm firmly wrapped around Magnus' waist and with the other he was steadying himself on Magnus' worktable. Magnus could still feel the last of the delicious tremors that run through Alec's body. Alec's expression told him that he could also feel the shudders that were running through Magnus as the last of the aftershocks of their powerful climaxes made their way through their systems. Suspecting that Alec felt as lightheaded as he did, Magnus tighten his hold on him, just in case his knees decided to give out.

Alec looked around at the sheets of paper and the bottles of potions and herbs that, a few minutes ago, had laid in neat and organized piles and groups on the table, but that now were strewn all over the floor. Some of the bottles and jars that had managed to remain on the table after Alec swept things aside to make room for Magnus were laying on their sides, some of their content spilling onto the wooden surface.

"I am sorry I messed up your desk," he said turning to look at Magnus again, his smile now a bit more apologetic than before. "I hope none of this is dangerous. I don't fancy being turned into a toad."

Magnus leaned in and kissed Alec gently and tenderly, and then gave him an indulgent smile. "Shadowhunter, since I've known you, I have learned to take precautions and keep my most dangerous and volatile ingredients high up on the shelves."

"A good precaution," Alec replied, and it was now him the one to swiftly kiss Magnus. "Still, I am sorry if I interrupted your work."

"I believe I very enthusiastically welcomed the interruption Alexander."

In the last four weeks, both Magnus and Alec had come to appreciate the pleasures and advantages of sharing a life with someone else. At the beginning, Magnus had thought that living with a Shadowhunter would be complicated, especially considering their distinct jobs and habits, and the fact that Magnus' warlock activities some time took him dangerously close to the boundary of what Shadowhunters considered acceptable or even legal.

Yet, from the very beginning, living with Alec had been easy. The day after they returned to New York, Alec had moved into Magnus' apartment without much fanfare, carrying what Magnus thought was a rather small duffle bag containing an assortment of grey and black jeans, t-shirts and hoodies and a few books. The bulkiest of his possessions were his Shadowhunter gear, his bow and arrow and the few weapons he carried. But Magnus had emptied the closet by the entrance for Alec to store them. Anyone looking at Alec would think that Shadowhunters were spartan and unostentatious, but Magnus, who knew Izzy and Jace and had known many Shadowhunters across history, knew these were just Alec's qualities.

Since childhood, Alec had lived the life of a soldier: tidy, disciplined and ruled by orders and laws. He had shared home with his family and other Shadowhunters, but he had always protected his private space, the space in which he guarded his secrets and insecurities. Alec had been nervous about living with a glamorous warlock with a reputation for debauchery, flamboyance and chaos. Yet, he had quickly learned that Magnus was tidy, clean and adept to house shores, qualities that Alec shared and appreciated a great deal. Furthermore, despite his reputation, Magnus enjoyed quiet dinners, evening walks through the city, and peaceful evenings at home. He liked parties too, of course, and him and Alec often went to bars and hang out with their friends.

What was most surprising for both of them was how caring and affectionate they both were. They showed those qualities in many small and no so small details, like Alec making breakfast before leaving for work, bringing Magnus coffee when he was working, wrapping a sweater around Magnus' shoulders when it was cold. Magnus corresponded with similar caring gestures of his own, making sure Alec ate a good meal after a long day at the Institute, mixing him a drink when he came home, ensuring the fridge was stocked with things Alec liked to eat.

In the process, Alec and Magnus had gotten to experience some of the ordinary things mundane couples usually did, things that Magnus had done at different times in his life when he had tried to live more like a mundane, but that to Alec were foreign. Magus had teased Alec the first time they went to the supermarket and Alec had to choose what brand of bread to buy and figure out the value of US currency. When Magnus asked, Alec explained that Shadowhunters did not do groceries, that at the institute food was delivered, usually by a downworlder working for a Downworld company.

Magnus constantly marveled at how easily they have gone from singular to plural – our favorite cereal, our favorite restaurant, our favorite laundry detergent – and how easily two lives that were so distinct had intertwined. Some might say that this was because they were still in the honeymoon stage of their relationship. Yet, something told Magnus that their relationship was strong and that the care and love they felt for one another would survive the bumps they were bound to encounter along the way.

And then, there was the intimacy: the nights in which they did not make love but still went to sleep in each other's arms; the times when one of them awoke in the middle of the night and reached for the other under the sheets, and the other responded even in his sleep and, in no time, they were making passionate love. There were the mornings when Magnus walked into the bathroom, took off his pajamas and stepped into the shower after Alec, and then saw Alec run off a while later, his hair still dripping wet, a half-eaten toast in his hand, halfheartedly complaining that Magnus had made him late for work. There were the furtive encounters when without prearrangements they came together seeking the bliss of coming undone in each other's arms. And, there were surprises like today, when Alec came home, walked with assertive steps into Magnus' office, carelessly dropping his jacket on the back of a chair along the way, and without a word or preamble, grabbed Magnus by the waist and pushed him against his worktable, claiming his lips and his body with the intensity and impetus of a whirlwind. Magnus could not help but surrender to the hurricane of Alec's desire and in no time that desire was carrying them along with such passion that they did not even have time to remove all their clothes before they were lost.

"I'll help you tidy up," Alec now said but he did not relinquish his hold on Magnus. Instead, he leaned in and ardently and tenderly kissed him again and the mess did no longer matter.

An insistent ringing tone suddenly and rudely irrupted in their moment and, without breaking the kiss, Alec began to search in his pockets for the culprit phone. A chuckle escaped Magnus' lips and Alec joined in. For whomever was trying to reach the serious and highly competent Head of the New York Institute could not imagine the compromising position in which Alec found himself at the moment. Reluctantly, Alec had to relinquish his possession of Magnus' lips and, crouching down, he retrieved his phone from where it laid under a sheet of paper on the floor.

"Shoot, I need to go Magnus," Alec said looking at the message on the screen. "I came to ask you out for lunch… Now I feel bad, maybe I can call and tell them that I am busy..."

"Go do your job Shadowhunter," Magnus interrupted and then kissed Alec on the forehead.

"Dinner then?" Alec asked.

"Yes, I have to go see a client this afternoon, but I should be back by then."

Alec stepped back and began to rearrange his clothes and, getting down from his worktable, Magnus did the same. "I am sorry your glamorous shirt is all wrinkled now Magnus," Alec said stepping closer and trying to smooth the warlock's white linen shirt with his hand.

"I think this makes us even Alexander," Magnus replied smiling and steading Alec's hands with his own. "If my memory serves me right, in your office the other day, I had to magically reattach some of the buttons on your shirt."

"Good times" Alec said, his smile broadening and his eyes sparkling, "I am glad there are no security cameras there." He then kissed Magnus one last time – the kiss both a reminder and a promise of things to come – before stepping away and grabbing his jacket. "Do I look okay?" he asked from the door, looking at himself to make sure he was sufficiently presentable.

"Like a respectable Shadowhunter," Magnus said.

"I am sorry about the mess, Magnus," Alec said, his hand in the doorknob, and his tone was now truly apologetic.

"Nothing that a little magic cannot fix Alexander. Besides, it was worth it."

As Magnus brought order back to his worktable, he thought, not for the first time, how wonderful it was to be young and in love again; how amazing it was to explore with someone you love the things that made you and them scream from pleasure; and how fortunate he felt to be the one Alec had chosen to accompany him in his own journey of self-discovery. All along, Magnus had been pleasantly surprised to discover that Alec was a passionate man, a perfect combination of loving, gentle, generous and demanding. Furthermore, as today exemplified, he was adventurous and even audacious. Alec was a man of contrasts, Magnus thought with a smile: reserved, serious and even shy in public, but demonstrative and full of fire and passion in private.

"Are you sure that you guys are a couple?" Jace, who never wasted an opportunity to hold Clary's hand, put his arms around her or kiss her in public, had asked during one of Magnus' visits to the Institute. "I mean my brother is so serious and uptight."

"Well Jace, you know what they say about the dangers of apparently calm waters," had been Magnus' only reply and Alec, who had been listening to the conversation, turned as red as beets.

The analogy was spot on, thought Magnus, their relationship was in many ways like the surface of a lake that by all accounts seemed tranquil, but that underneath concealed strong currents. Magnus and Alec never touched, kissed or expressed affection in public. When Downworld and Nephilim business brought them together, they both acted in the upmost professional manner. Alec was cordial and not uncaring, but he never showed favoritism or partiality towards Magnus, and Magnus was more than capable of disagreeing with Alec or expressing his opinion in regard to any aspect of Nephilim-Downworld politics. However, when they were in private, they were fire and flames, and the passion of their love seemed to know no end. They were also affectionate, tender and caring. They were not hiding; in fact, everybody knew that they were in a relationship and that they lived together. They simply thought that their love was the kind of treasured emotion that should be expressed in the privacy of their home and bed.

Yes, thought Magnus as he grabbed his leather bag and began to wave his arms in the air, calling on the forces needed to open the portal that would take him to his business meeting, being in love was wonderful and rejuvenating. He hoped he and Alec would get to enjoy being in love for a long, long time. Later, he would think that perhaps the happiness and novelty of being in love had blinded him to the signs that were already there. He would think that if he had not been so engrossed in the sensations and the delight of starting a new adventure with someone he loved like he never thought possible to love anyone, he would have paid more attention. But love makes us all naïve.

A few hours later, Magnus was wrapping up a meeting with the high-level executive of a transnational corporation that had hired him to help in a new business venture. After apologizing to the tired-looking woman for the time difference between New York and Osaka – which required them to meet in the dead of night – Magnus headed out towards the elevator. He was thinking about stopping to pick up a box of wagashi before portalling home, when the ring in his finger began to insistently vibrate and then burn hot against his skin. Surprised, Magnus looked at it for a second. The ring commonly vibrated softly every time Alec distractedly gave a gentle turn to its spinning inset, and the sensation told Magnus that Alec was thinking of him. He was certain that Alec's ring gave similar vibes at least twice a day. However, this was not that kind of vibration; this was insistent and alarming, and as the heat emanating from the metal increased, the gold and silver spinning inset began to turn of its own accord.

A second earlier in New York, Alec had walked into the gym where Izzy was waiting for him. He was feeling tired and the increasing pressure in his chest was making him feel more than a little dizzy. But as he had done every time that, in the last four weeks, he had felt that energy in his chest threatening to break free, he had gone in search of some physical activity, something to tire him out and quiet the buzzing, burning and itching he felt in those scars that refused to go away. Today it had proven to be a particularly challenging day, perhaps the result of his busy schedule, but he had hoped that an hour or so of sparring with Izzy would calm him enough to be able to go home and keep hiding the scars from Magnus.

As he walked into the gym, the room suddenly begun to spin out of control and he felt that a burning hot rock had lodged itself in his chest. The rock then cracked and broke, and what he could only describe as hot lava began to pour out of it, spreading throughout his system, burning organs, veins and skin. The pain was unbearable, heating and freezing as it reached his nerve ending, and a sensation of utter panic gripped him. Alec bent down, unable to catch his breath and, knowing he was about to lose consciousness, reached for the ring in his finger. Before darkness finally took him, Alec gave the ring a decisive full turn. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness were silver white lines running through his skin.

Magnus' heart skipped at least one beat and the hair at the back of his neck stood on end, but realizing what the vibrations and heat meant, he quickly jumped into action. He stepped into the elevator and, as soon as the doors closed, he swiftly waved his arms around, not caring that the energy from the portal he was opening would likely shake the building and make the lights go off. When the whirlpool of energy finally acquired coherence, Magnus stuck the hand with the ring through the event horizon and then stepped through, knowing that the ring would portal him to wherever his lover was now urgently calling for him.

Magnus emerged from the portal in the Institute's gym and the first thing he saw was that the lights were flickering and that the room seemed to be shaking as if from an earthquake. But Magnus had no time to think about those things. His eyes quickly swept the room and stopped when they found Alec lying unconscious on the floor, silvery energy flowing in lines along his skin and illuminating the runes visible on his neck and arms. Izzy was kneeling beside him and insistently called for Alec to wake up.

"What happened!?" Magnus urgently asked as he approached and too kneeled beside Alec. His first instinct was to lay a hand on Alec's chest to feel for a heartbeat and send a stream of magic that might wake him. But, seeing the silver lines of energy running wild through Alec's skin, he halted. Touching Alec with his magic was likely a bad idea at this moment, especially considering the little he knew about what was happening and the effect that mysterious force had had on his own powers before.

"I don't know," Izzy replied in an alarmed voice. "We were going to train but then Alec clutched his chest and fell on one knee… and then, something happened Magnus," she added and turned to look at Magnus, her eyes wild and her voice uncomprehending. "His skin glowed and some force bent him backward…it lifted him up. He floated for a second before falling… The whole building was shaking… I have never seen or felt anything like that before."

The panic and the shock were making Izzy sound almost incoherent. Magnus tried to master his own panic before turning to look at Izzy and give her what he hoped was a calm and reassuring look. "It is okay, Izzy. We will figure this out."

Still reluctant to touch Alec, Magnus began to run his hand a few inches above the Shadowhunter's body, tentatively feeling for Alec's life energy and trying to ascertain whether it was safe to touch him. The sensation was like touching a live wire, as if the energy emanating from Alec was wild, untamed and raw. Magnus looked at the floor around Alec and saw what he could only describe as tiny filaments of energy reaching from Alec towards the floor in search, Magnus suspected, of soil in which to discharge pent-up energy. He knew what that meant, he had known for a while, but he still refused to believe it.

Suddenly, Alec gasped, his chest expanded, and his back arched against the floor, before falling down once again. Magnus perceived a shift in the silvery flow, as if the excess of energy that had been accumulating in Alec had finally found much needed release. He looked back at the face of his lover and called for him in a gentle voice, willing him to open his eyes. After a moment and as if he had heard him, Alec opened his eyes and when they looked at Magnus, Magnus saw the last remnants of quicksilver fading from Alec's pupils. Alec looked at Magnus with eyes full of agony before he lost his frail grasp on reality and felt unconscious once again.

"We need to get him to the infirmary Izzy," Magnus stated and making a superhuman effort to keep his own magic from reacting and causing an explosion when it came into contact with Alec, he wrapped his arms around him. He gestured for Izzy to do the same and together they half carried, and half dragged Alec out of the gym and next door to the Institute's infirmary. Alec was a tall and muscular man, which meant that he was also heavy, but at that moment, Magnus did not feel strain, effort or exhaustion.

"What happened Magnus? What is going on with Alec?" Izzy asked, her voice full of puzzlement and persistent panic.

Thankfully, Magnus did not have to answer, for when they were laying Alec on one of the hospital beds, Izzy's phone began to insistently buzz. "It is Clary, something happened to Jace during their patrol," Izzy informed Magnus as soon as she got off the call.

"Go help your other brother," Magnus instructed, his tone even and reassuring. "I will take care of this one. And Izzy," Magnus added putting a hand gently on Izzy's shoulder, "let's keep this between us for now, until we know more. We do not want to worry the Shadowhunters under Alec's command."

"This is what happens when you try to suppress magic," Tessa declared a while later, as she sent a steady stream of soothing energy directly into Alec's chest, the silver glow on his skin slowly abating.

Magnus' breath caught in his throat and he closed his eyes in a gesture that was equal parts agony, despondency and desperation. For Tessa had just said the word that Magnus had been trying so desperately to ignore since that very first time Alec's marks glowed, and his eyes turned the color of quicksilver. In one word, Tessa had captured the truth that Magnus had been staunchly denying since that night he felt the familiar pull emanating from Alec's chest. All this time, Magnus had thought that if he did not say the word, that if he did not even think it, then what he knew in his very heart could not be true.

"Oh, come on Magnus," Tessa said, her tone one of admonishment, her eyes on Magnus full of fire. "Do not tell me that you did not know what was happening to Alec. Catarina and I shared our suspicions with you."

"Alec did not say anything to me; I did not know that he has been trying to suppress his powers," Magnus replied, his voice almost a whisper. Yet, now that the word was out and floating in the air between them, he could not ignore it any more. He had to recognize that the signs had been there all along: Alec's look of exhaustion that Magnus had attributed to long working hours and ongoing demon threats; the look of loss and even pain that crossed Alec's eyes sometime; Alec's politely declining an invitation to portal to Paris for an evening, saying that he preferred a quiet dinner at home.

"Do you mean to tell me that he has been trying to deal with this all on his own since you came back to New York?" Tessa's tone was now one of outrage. "No wonder he almost exploded and brought the Institute down with him. I thought you had talked to him Magnus! I would not have gone to Brazil if I had known!"

Magnus' friend had arrived, as if by pure chance, a few minutes ago. A Shadowhunter had escorted her to the infirmary and announced that Tessa was there for her three o'clock meeting with Alec. Magnus had welcomed her at the door and had informed the Shadowhunter that Alec had twisted an ankle during training and that he would meet with Tessa in the infirmary. Thankfully, the recruit had not asked any further questions and no one else had interrupted them since. Izzy had called a few minutes after leaving to help Jace and Clary, to inform Magnus that Jace had experienced sudden dizziness while on patrol but that he seemed fine now. Magnus had instructed her to stay with Jace, just in case, and had reassured her that Alec was okay, that he was taking care of her brother, and that Alec would explain later.

When he asked, Tessa informed Magnus that she had contacted Alec the day before to tell him that she was back for a short visit and wanted to see him, and they had agreed to meet today.

"You guys," Tessa now said, her voice becoming angry, angrier, in fact, than Magnus had ever heard. "You are made for each other you know. Neither of you wants to worry the other and, in the process, you make things worse for everybody involved. Communication, Magnus. That, more than great sex, is the secret of a good relationship. Take it from me who was married to a Shadowhunter for decades. Do you remember what happened when my powers first started to manifest? If I had not had you and Will I would not have made it."

Magnus did not argue; he simply listened to his friend's well-deserved chastising. Tessa was right, he should have talked to Alec, pay more attention, ask more often how he was feeling. But love makes fools of us all, and he was probably the biggest fool of all. "How bad is it Tessa?" he asked, his voice heavy with anguish. Once again, he wished he had paid more attention to healing spells, specially spells meant to fix magic.

"He is fine," Tessa replied with a sigh that was half exasperation and half resignation. "The excess energy had been released. His vitals are good; he just needs rest."

"We must do something," Magnus said, and he run a gentle finger along Alec's forehead, brushing aside a lock of hair. The memory of his lover smiling and apologizing for messing up his worktable was such a contrast to Alec's now pale face. "We have to find a way to fix this."

"There is nothing to fix Magnus," Tessa said, and her voice carried the weight of a death sentence. "If it has not gone away already it is because it is not going away. I told you the last time we spoke, Alec will adapt and so will you. You have to accept it."

"How can I accept this? I am the one responsible for what happened! How can I expect him to forgive me?"

"Magnus, you are not responsible," Tessa replied. "Neither you nor Alec could have predicted what happened. He has shown you that he is capable of going to the very depths of hell – quite literally – for you. You would do the same in a heartbeat. He will adapt and so will you. This is just a hurdle."

"This is more than a hurdle! I cannot let this just happened without a fight," Magnus said and with the fingers of one hand wiped away the tears that were running down his cheek. "I have to stop it."

"Would you have tried to stop my powers from manifesting Magnus? What would you have said if Will had asked you to stop me from becoming a warlock?"

"But this is different," Magnus replied, even though he was not sure his argument held water. "You were born what you are."

"And Alec is becoming whatever he will be," Tessa interrupted. "These are mysterious forces Magnus, forces not even us can fully understand. But as I have proven, there is nothing that says that a Nephilim cannot also be a warlock."

"I do not want Alec to become a warlock; that is not what he wants for his life."

"Oh honey, after three hundred years, even you have to accept that we rarely have the life we plan," Tessa said, her tone no longer angry, but sad and compassionate. "Did you plan to fall in love with a Shadowhunter, did he plan to fall in love with you?"

It was already dark outside when Alec finally opened his eyes, and when his eyes met Magnus', they were their usual rich and deep brown. Magnus smiled lovingly, and holding Alec's hand, lifted it to his lips for a gentle kiss. He then held it firmly as he asked Alec how he was feeling.

"I feel like a truck just run over my chest," Alec replied. "I am sorry you had to leave your meeting to come help me. I don't know what happened."

"It is okay," Magnus reassured him, swiftly shifting his eyes towards Tessa and then back, his friend's expression one of relief and a little reproach. "Tessa is here, and she has been most helpful. You know how bad I am at healing."

"Hi Tessa," Alec said turning to the other warlock. "I guess you arrived at the nick of time." Alec closed his eyes once again because the room seemed to still be spinning, even if less violently than before.

"Rest some more, Alec," Tessa instructed. "You need to build up your strength. Magnus and I will be here."

"I am sorry Magnus…" Alec said but did not finish the sentence because his eyes were heavy, and he was drifting off to sleep once again. However, Magnus did not need to hear what Alec was sorry for; he already knew. Alec had not wanted to worry him, but by keeping his secret, he had had to face the changes he was undergoing alone and likely scared. Magnus thought that he was the one who was the sorriest; for he had miserably failed Alec; for he had not protected him; for if he had not come into Alec's life all those months ago, Alec would not be paying such a hefty price right now.

As soon as he was certain that Alec was asleep once again, Magnus grabbed his bag and headed for the door.

"Where are you going Magnus?" asked Tessa, who at that moment was walking in with a newly mixed fortifying potion for Alec.

"I am going to have words with my father or one of his minions," Magnus stated, his voice a knife that cut the silence of the room.

"Come on Magnus don't do anything stupid," Tessa pleaded.

"I must at least try Tessa, or I won't be able to live with myself."

As Magnus walked along the Institute's corridors towards the roof, he thought about the times when he would not have been allowed past the sanctuary or the Institute's Head's office. So many things had happened since that night Clary and her new Shadowhunter friends crashed his party, so many things that had resulted in him getting to know and feeling more comfortable at the New York Institute than in any other of the Institutes he had visited in his very long life. As a result, he now knew most of the nocks and crannies in the enormous and ancient building, including what part of the roof was the most remote and secluded. As he climbed the stairs, he was thankful that he always carried in his bag the tools of his trade, especially those tools needed to summon a greater demon.

"My lord Asmodeus warned me you would be in touch demon son." The demon that now looked at Magnus with a derisive expression had been Asmodeus' right-hand man when Magnus and Alec were trapped in his court, the one with the powdered wig and the jaundiced eyes and skin.

After more than an hour of unsuccessfully trying to summon his father, Magnus had realized that Asmodeus was likely too deep in hell, too far out of Magnus' reach for his powers to pull him out. So, instead and determined to get answers at any cost, Magnus had decided to modify the summoning spell to catch any of his father's followers.

"You finally got your father's gift, didn't you?" the demon asked, an evil smile disfiguring his features even more.

"Of what gift do you speak demon?" Magnus asked. With a twist of his wrists, Magnus made the flames from the black candles surrounding the pentagram burn hotter and closer to the demon, tightening the trap in which Magnus had caught the ugly creature.

"The one he put inside the Nephilim boy, of course," replied the demon and his evil smile showed several rows of rotting teeth. "The one you activated with your own magic, warlock."

"Speak plainly," Magnus ordered, his voice dead serious and authoritative. "Or you will find out what the powers of my blood can do."

"You did not count on your father's hatred and desire for vengeance, did you demon son? He knew you would try to save the Nephilim boy. He knows that you are and will always been a hopeless romantic in addition to a traitor." Despite the restrictive trap, the demon seemed to be enjoying himself immensely at Magnus' expense. "He put something, you see, a seed inside the boy and with your magic, you made that seed open, germinate and grow."

"Why would my father do such a thing? How does that help him escape hell?"

"It doesn't," the demon replied, and he made a dismissive gesture with his hand. Magnus thought that the smug look did not improve the demon's sickly appearance. "But it does help him take vengeance on you."

"What kind of vengeance is that?" Magnus asked and when the demon refused to answer and, instead, sardonically snickered, Magnus twisted his wrists once more, making the candles burn even hotter and closer to the demon. "Answer me!" he ordered.

"Asmodeus knew that you hate the demon blood that runs through your veins," the demon finally replied. "Now, the same blood runs through your Nephilim's veins. Poetic justice, don't you think, to give to the one you love that which you most hate about yourself?"

The demon's voice and posture grew more menacing with each word and his demonic power began to violently push against the magic restrains with which Magnus had him trapped. The pressure and the demand that the trap made on Magnus' magic was beginning to weaken him and his magic was draining rapidly. He suddenly realized that this demon was stronger than he had originally thought, stronger, in fact, than most demons he had ever known, perhaps as strong as Asmodeus.

"There must be a cure, a way to reverse the curse," Magnus said, trying to disguise the strain in his voice. "You will give me that cure."

"Stupid child," the demon now said with a snarl that had none of the deceivingly calm tone of a second ago. "That is the beauty of my lord's vengeance," he laughed. "There is no cure, the transformation once triggered is permanent and unchangeable. Do you have any idea how many demons Asmodeus destroyed to arrive at the right combination of demonic blood?"

As the demon's voice grew angrier, more powerful and booming, the ground began to shake and the light bulbs illuminating the roof exploded, throwing sparkles in all directions and plunging the roof in deep darkness.

The demon's words felt like a bucket of freezing water dropped down Magnus' back, but he had no time to fully take stock of their meaning. For he felt the demon increase his resistance against the magic restrains, and he had to commit even more of his powers to maintaining the creature trapped within the pentagram.

"I do not believe you," Magnus stated, "You will tell me how to reverse the curse."

The demon who had been looking straight at him, suddenly shifted his gaze towards somewhere behind Magnus, but not wanting to lose even more of his hold on the pentagram, Magnus did not dare look back.

"Will you love the Nephilim now that he is tainted and contaminated with our blood demon son? And do you think he will still love you when he learns what he has become because of you?"

The demon gave an abrupt and violent push against his restrains and, for a moment, Magnus thought he was lost, that the demon would finally break the trap and would get lose. But suddenly he felt a hand on his shoulder and when he looked, Alec was there standing beside him. Alec looked at Magnus and smiled, his expression completely devoid of judgement. He then gestured to Magnus' other side and when Magnus turned, Tessa was also there.

"What do you say Shadowhunter?" the demon asked, his voice growing in volume at the same rate that he exerted pressure against the forces that kept him trapped. "Can you love that which you have been trained to hate?"

"There is nothing about Magnus that could ever change my feelings for him," Alec stated, his voice strong and certain. "Asmodeus has failed miserably; for I love everything about Magnus and, as a result, I can never hate what I am or might become because of him."

The demon screeched loudly and, extending his arms, pushed against his restrains, forcing the magical field to expand as if it was a balloon with too much air and that was about to explode. Magnus extended his arms even wider and resisted with all his strength and powers, trying to contain the demonic energy that threatened to break out of the pentagram. As his power crashed against the demonic energy, Magnus felt like he was trying to contain a hurricane and, hadn't been for Alec who was supporting him, he was sure the force would have thrown him back a few meters.

"Together Magnus; take my strength," Alec said softly and when Magnus turned to look at him, his eyes were gentle and full of love.

Alec had shared his strength with Magnus before and, since then, Magnus had learned to recognize the feel of Alec's life force. The sensation had always felt natural and effortless, as if him and Alec were made to share not only love and life, but also strength. Now, when Magnus tapped into Alec's energy, what he felt was not only Nephilim life force, but also a power, an energy that was pure and good, an energy that made him think of the crystalline waters of an unspoiled river. As Alec allowed his own power to flow into Magnus, he too got to experience the warmth, strength and goodness of Magnus' magic and the sensation was both familiar and surprising.

Alec turned and, with a determined expression, looked at the demon who at that moment was growing in size and power, pushing with unbelievable strength against the borders of the pentagram. "I banish you, demon, the inventor and master of all deceit," Alec said, remembering the words of the old vanishing spell that Magnus had said to his father in the Seven Circle, a spell he, Alec, had had to memorize as part of his Shadowhunter training.

"I invoke the secret and terrible name of god," Tessa continued from the other side of Magnus, her voice also full of determination, a stream of blue magic shooting out from her fingers.

"By the divine power of god, whose name makes Lucifer's children tremble and coward, I vanish you!" Magnus completed the incantation. He directed a powerful stream of gold and silver magic towards the demon, a stream that resembled the interlocking design in the rings he had made for him and Alec.

The demon staggered, and he hit the magic barrier behind him, and before he could regain his footing, Magnus and Tessa released another surge of magic that hit him in the stomach. He seemed to crumple and fold, as if he was a piece of paper being squeezed by a fist until he was not more than a ball. Before he disappeared back into hell, he issued one last high pitch cry.

Magnus fell on one knee and if Alec had not been there to support him, he would have collapsed all the way to the ground. "I got you Magnus," Alec said, wrapping his arms around the warlock.

"You should be in bed Alexander. What are you doing here?"

"Saving your hide apparently," Alec replied. "I woke up and you were not there and then Tessa told me what you were planning to do, so I came to help."

"Who was that nasty demon?" Tessa asked. "I don't remember ever coming across one so powerful."

"The bearer of my father's bad news," Magnus replied.

"Can we leave the explanations for later?" Alec interrupted. "Every alarm just went off downstairs. The whole institute is likely to be here any minute. We need to clean up this mess." Alec gesture at the broken glass and the electric sparkles that were still shooting out from broken light fixtures, as well as the burning marks left by the pentagram on the stone ground.

"Magnus, you and Tessa portal home," Alec said, after, in a flurry of activity and with no small amount of magic, they cleaned as much as possible the mess left by the demon. "I have to stay a bit longer and come up with an explanation about what happened, an explanation that can put my people at ease."

"I did this," Magnus said, knowing perfectly well the punishment for summoning a demon in Institute property. "I should stay and face the consequences."

"Absolutely not," Alec replied, his tone not leaving any room for protest. "I will handle this. Besides, the least my people know the better."

"But Alexander, are you feeling well enough to stay?" Magnus asked.

"I am fine Magnus, really," he replied. "I can handle a short report. You order us some dinner in the meantime. I am kind of starving and we should at least feed Tessa."

"Come on Magnus," Tessa said putting a hand on Magnus' arm. "Let's leave Alec to do his job."

"I am here for you," Tessa told Alec a minute later and before she stepped through the portal Magnus had just opened.

Magnus gazed at Alec with eyes that conveyed feelings that Magnus could not yet find words to express, feelings of guilt, pride, fear and love all mixed together. When he turned and took a step towards the portal, Alec stopped him by grabbing him by the arm and gently pulling him back. Surprised, Magnus turned, and his eyes met the deep brown pool of Alec's eyes.

"Every word I said to that demon is true, Magnus," Alec said as he lifted his other hand and placed it against Magnus' cheek. "I love everything about you because you are a good and beautiful soul. If I am ever fortunate enough to be just a little bit more like you, I will love myself better for it. I hope you can love and accept me the same way."

"Alexander," Magnus said and lifting his hand placed it against the spot where he knew Alec's mark glowed silver, "you must never doubt my love for you, for it is infinite and eternal. Tonight, you have filled my heart with pride."

Alec leaned in and kissed Magnus deeply and tenderly, and Magnus thought his heart was bursting from all the love that filled it.

"I will see you at home soon," Alec said as Magnus reluctantly let go of him and stepped through the portal.


	18. Chapter 18 - Your Hand upon my Chest

**Your Hand upon my Chest**

"You will ask me to marry you one day Magnus," Alec said as he put down the book he was reading and looked at his boyfriend straight in the eyes. The statement come completely out of the blue and it was not a question or a speculation, but rather an affirmation, a prediction completely devoid of uncertainty.

Magnus looked up from the ancient manuscript he had just been hired to decipher, did a double take, and almost dropped the coffee cup he had in his hand. When he looked at Alec again, his expression was a mixture of confusion and surprise.

They were sitting at each end of the sofa in their terrace. Magnus had one leg folded under him and one elbow propped against the back of the couch. Alec had his bare feet up on the ottoman, the book that had been in his hands now rested closed on his lap, his finger marking the page he had been reading.

Magnus was wearing one of his characteristic silk pajama bottoms – cerulean blue – which he had matched with one of Alec's old black t-shirts. The ensemble was an unlikely combination of fashion and functionality, glamour and thread bareness. Yet, it was somehow also completely Magnus. The early summer sun that filtered through the white canvas of the gigantic patio umbrella under which they were sheltered made Magnus' skin and his unglamored eyes glow even more golden than usual. Alec thought that the way the morning light kissed Magnus' skin accentuated his look of surprise and made him look even more beautiful and young.

They were having a leisured Saturday morning: a morning of reading, listening to music, and enjoying a breakfast they had cooked together. Alec had been on late night patrol the night before and Magnus had already been deep asleep when he came home around three in the morning. Magnus had fallen asleep with the blinds open and, before heading to the bathroom for a shower, Alec had spent a long moment watching how the moonlight reflected on the white sheets and outlined Magnus' figure making him look like a marble sculpture, softness captured in stone.

After washing away the dirt and stench of the city, Alec had put on the cottons boxer shorts and old t-shirt that served as his pajamas. He had then gotten in bed, looking forward to several hours of peaceful rest and sleep with his arms wrapped around his lover. However, he had soon realized that, one, he was overdressed, and, two, that rest and sleep were overrated. For as soon as he spooned against Magnus, he had felt the electrifying sensation of Magnus' completely naked body under the sheets.

The feeling of Magnus' bare skin and muscular back against his chest, as usual, had had the power of dissipating all exhaustion, pushing away sleep and making Alec's body immediately came alive and alight. The breath had caught in Alec's throat, and even though he could tell that Magnus was deep asleep, he could not help kissing him on the back of the neck and biting his earlobe, the feel of skin and metal from Magnus' silver earrings, awakening the sensory receptors in his mouth and tongue.

"I should let you sleep," Alec had whispered in Magnus' ear, calling on his willpower to regain control over his unruly desire, determined not to disturb Magnus' rest.

But Magnus' body had already been answering the call of Alec's body, even if his mind was still half asleep. He had instinctually leaned even further against Alec, his body almost melting into the body of the Shadowhunter, his breathing picking up speed, goosebumps rising on his skin. They had both known then that sleep was not a priority at the moment, that the night called for passion and love.

Aching for the sensation of bare skin against bare skin, Alec had removed his makeshift pajamas. He had then tightened his hold on Magnus, wrapping an arm firmly across Magnus' chest and pulling him even closer, his body suddenly besieged by an even more uncontained rush of desire. Alec had wrapped a hand gently around Magnus' jaw and enticed him to turn his head, so he could savour those lips that Alec was certain one day would drive him to insanity. The taste and feel of those lips and the sensation of Magnus' playful tongue finally defeated any vestige of reason and prudence left in Alec.

Alec's naughty mouth had finally pulled Magnus wholly from his sleep, and he replied to Alec's beckoning with a loud gasp, the feel of Alec's body and mouth confusing, enticing and tantalizing. By the time his mind had woken up, Magnus' body was already responding to Alec's enticing lips, the touch of his fingers and the feel of Alec's quick breathing against his skin.

While retaining full possessions of Magnus' lips, Alec had begun to run a hand slowly but resolutely down Magnus' bare chest and abdomen, and then proceeded lower and lower. His hand had drawn enticing and tempting swirls and circles as it leisurely journeyed the long and slow road to its intended destination. As he did, every nerve ending on Alec' skin and every one of his senses had become fully awake and completely attuned to each of Magnus' responses.

They had spent a long while caressing, kissing and moving together by the light of the full moon. They had relished in the sensation of making passionate but unhurried love, knowing that the journey up to that peak from which they knew they would eventually jump was as important as the destination. When later, he recognized the familiar signs that told him that Magnus was about to let go of the climax that was building within him, Alec had been determined to postpone gratification a little longer. To that end, and with the unrivaled dexterity and strength of a Shadowhunter, Alec had shifted both their positions, enticing Magnus to turn around, so they could face one another, he on his back, and Magnus on top of him.

Alec had looked into Magnus' cat eyes and the force of those eyes was mesmerizing, their power calling and beckoning that still-mysterious force that always lurked just under Alec's skin. Over the last few weeks, Alec had learned that it was futile to resist the power of those eyes, and before he even attempted to reign in his self-control, he had already been drawing silvery lines and circles all over Magnus' back, tiny white and silver sparkles shooting from those places where his fingers touched the warlock's skin.

When Magnus looked into Alec's eyes, he already knew what he would see, that in those pupils, he would find swirls of quicksilver, their glow reflecting and competing with the moonlight. He knew because he had already felt the air around them becoming electrically charged, like the air prior to a thunderstorm. He had also felt the already familiar change in the intensity and feel of Alec's touch, the indescribable sensation of being touched by pure magic. It was not roughness or forcefulness, but depth of feeling. Magnus understood with no small amount of exhilaration that tonight was one of those special nights: one of those nights when making love with this mysterious creature with whom he had the fortune of sharing his life and bed, was not just a union of bodies and spirits, but also of powers and magic.

"Come play with me Shadowhunter," Magnus had whispered, his eyes fixed on Alec. "Show me your power."

Accepting the invitation, Alec had closed his eyes and taken a deep breath, his chest expanding to the point of almost arching against the mattress. The silver glow of the mark on his chest had intensified and lines of silver had begun run along his skin, illuminating runes along the way.

In response to Alec's signal, Magnus had loosened the reigns on his own magic, setting it free. As they both let go of any attempt at restrain, silver and gold found one another, lines of magic and power becoming interwoven, flowing through skin and muscles, illuminating runes, shooting from fingers, and shinning in eyes in a harmonious dance. Even after weeks, the sensation of sharing magic was indescribable and almost overwhelming. It was as if every cell in their bodies had dissolved into pure light and energy, as if their very souls had become irremediably intertwined with each other and with the universe.

At that moment of ultimate connection, Alec had reached with his powers towards the forces of nature that fed magic and Magnus had followed. Together, they became keenly aware, not only of the incredible sensations of their bodies fused and moving together with ever increasing passion, but also of the mysterious forces that surrounded all living things, the miniscule particles of water and earth carried by the wind, the tiny vibrations caused by the love song of the crickets outside their window, the way the leaves on the trees experienced the touch of the night breeze.

As a shared climax had begun to build within them, and as their bodies began to shudder and tremble, the certainty of unimaginable pleasure had pulled them back to this shared moment in their bed. The movement of their bodies intensified even more, wind and gale in an ocean of pure magic, building, and building until they each felt they were exploding in millions of light particles, mind, body and soul transformed into pure and unadulterated ecstasy. Magnus called Alec's name as he collapsed against his chest, and Alec gathered him in his arms, his body protective and sheltering. As thousands of small and no so small shivers run to through their bodies, like waves crushing against one another in an uncontained tempest, Alec whispered words of love and devotion and planted dozens of kisses on Magnus' forehead and hair.

"Hi," Alec had said once he recovered his capacity for speech, a mischievous smile lifting the corners of his mouth. "Who needs Tessa's exercises if I have you to help me spend my unused energy."

"I am glad to be of service, Alexander," Magnus had said, his smile equally playful.

"I am sorry I woke you," Alec had added, a look of feign regret in his eyes.

"That was the plan all along," Magnus had replied, his body slowly relaxing against the chest of the Shadowhunter.

"It was a ploy then," Alec had whispered, his voice suddenly heavy with sleep. "What am I going to do with you Magnus?"

"I think you just proved that you know exactly what to do with me," Magnus had replied, shifting position so they could lie side by side, their foreheads touching, their arms wrapped around each other.

"Likewise," was Alec's replied, his eyes slowly closing.

"Now, sleep Alexander; you needed it."

"You do know I love you, don't you?" Alec had asked as he sighed deeply.

"Of course, I know," Magnus had replied and had then kissed Alec on the forehead, the gesture communicating that the feeling was mutual.

Magnus had stayed awake for a few moments longer, listening to Alec's breathing change and become deep and smooth as sleep carried him off. As he relaxed, Alec leaned in and put his nose close to the hollow of Magnus' throat, inhaling deeply the scent of his lover. The sound of Alec's breathing soon enticed Magnus to also relax, and his last thought before he too relinquished his hold on reality was that there were not enough numbers for him to count his blessings.

"You will ask me to marry you Magnus, I am sure of it," Alec was now repeating as if to make sure Magnus had heard him correctly the first time. The certainty of the statement and the force of his gaze told Magnus that the Shadowhunter was dead serious and absolutely sure of the veracity of his words.

"Should I remind you once again, Alexander, that it is forbidden for a Nephilim to marry a Downworlder?" Magnus stated. "Furthermore, same-sex marriage is not recognized under Nephilim law either."

"That doesn't matter," Alec replied. "As I told you before, I am doing all in my power to challenge those backward laws. It is time my people change their old ways. But even if they do not change the law, you will still ask me, and I will say yes and marry you even if that means leaving the Nephilim to live as a mundane."

Almost six weeks had passed since Magnus had summoned Asmodeus right-hand demon and learned of his father's latest attempt to take revenge on him. That night, it had been well past midnight when Alec walked through the door and, exhausted, collapsed on the couch, a deep sigh of relief escaping his lips. Magnus had put a plate of Chinese food in front of him and, as if in auto-pilot, Alec had eaten it, not knowing full well what he was ingesting. When Magnus offered to mix him a drink, he declined arguing that he was too tired and feared that he would pass out if he added alcohol to the mix. Instead, he had drank two big glasses of cold water.

When Magnus enquired, Alec had told him that things at the Institute were back to normal. He had told his people that a malfunction in the power generator had caused a short circuit on the roof, but that the issue had been quickly resolved. Jace was the one who remained unconvinced. They knew each other too well, and Jace was not the kind to ignore the effects that Alec's collapse had on his parabatai rune and on the angelic ties that linked them. Alec had known that sooner or later, he would have to have a serious conversation with his brother, and likely also with his sister. He just hoped that by then, he would have more concrete information to share. Since then, Alec had managed to avoid that conversation even when Jace continued asking, but Magnus thought that the tactic would not be effective for long.

Tessa had reminded Alec that she was Jace's ancestor, that even when the Nephilim did their upmost to forget that she was one of them once, the fact of the matter was that one of Idris' most respectable families carried warlock blood in their veins, even if a small amount of it. Jace would understand and accept the changes going in Alec, Tessa had quite certainly argued.

"I wish I could understand the changes myself," Alec had stated.

Now that the truth was out and there was no longer a need to hide it from Magnus, Alec had begun to speak openly about his struggles. He had told Magnus and Tessa that during the last month, he had waged a constant battle with a force he did not understand, a force that kept challenging his self-control, but he also felt compelled to hide.

The more he had tried to conceal and supress that energy that seemed to be emanating from his chest and running wild through his veins, the more it found ways to escape. Sometimes, it happened in ways Alec had not even noticed, like that day in Magnus' cottage when he went for a run and forgot his water bottle, and then, as if by magic, the bottle was in his hand. There had been several other similar incidents since then: his phone, which he was sure he had left on his desk, appearing in his pocket when he needed to make a call; an apple suddenly materializing on his desk just at the moment that he was thinking that he was hungry; the lights coming on by themselves when the room got too dark for him to read; his hair suddenly drying up as he was walking in from the rain wishing for a towel; an arrow appearing in his hand just when he needed it the most. Every time those things happened, he had experienced a sudden sense of relief in the pressure he constantly felt inside his chest and every time, the star-shaped marks on his chest and back had glowed silver. Physical activity had helped at first, but over time, even that had proven ineffective. "I didn't know what to do; I still don't know," he had added. "I mean, do you even understand these powers? Do we even know if this is permanent or temporary?"

Tessa had replied that unfortunately they were in unknown territory and that, as far as she knew, no one had ever gone through what Alec had gone through, that they just had to wait and see. "There is one thing you must promise me though," Tessa had added, as she fixed her eyes on Alec. "No more trying to supress your powers. It is dangerous Alec. Warlock powers need to be exercised and mastered. We feed on the energy around us, but we also need to spend some of that energy, or it builds up with nasty consequence like the ones we saw today."

"It is a matter of balance," Magnus had added, "we are conduits for magic and we need to ensure it smoothly flows through us. If we use too much, we grow weak, if we do not use enough, it builds up."

"I will teach you the exercises that helped me when my powers started to manifest," Tessa had offered. Since then, she had been true to her word and had called and paid regular visits to Alec. The two had developed a flourishing friendship and a rather unlikely complicity, which came to the fore specially when convincing Magnus to desist on his attempt to summon his father and force him to revert the curse he had put on Alec.

That night and for many nights afterwards, Magnus had been guilt-ridden, and when Alec had apologized for keeping the manifestation of his powers secret, he had told Alec that he had nothing to be sorry for. That if anyone had reasons to be sorry it was him, that Alec had stayed quiet because he did not want Magnus to worry. "I am the reason why you are going through these changes, I am the reason why you felt you had to hide, and I am the one who needs to find a solution…"

"Magnus," Alec had interrupted and had then placed a hand atop Magnus' hand as if to quiet Magnus' apprehension, "I knew that going to hell and facing Asmodeus would have consequences. I went with my eyes fully open and I would do it again in a heartbeat if you were in danger. You are not responsible for this. And, there is nothing to be gained by starting this blaming game. May I remind you that Asmodeus would have never gotten to you if I had not made the first mistake?"

"Alec is right, assigning blame is not helpful Magnus," Tessa had added, and her smile was both sincere and compassionate.

"You must promise me here and in front of Tessa that you will not try to summon your father again to ask him to revert my transformation," Alec had said, his hold on Magnus' hand growing stronger. "It is not only dangerous Magnus, but also useless. Besides, I am open to accepting whatever the future brings."

"But don't you want to at least search for a solution?" Magnus had asked.

"Searching for a solution implies that this is a problem," Alec had stated, and his tone had been a little sharper than he had intended. "This is not a curse; this is just a new challenge. You thinking that this is a curse or punishment only gives Asmodeus what he has wanted all along. This is difficult and challenging now, but in time, we will adapt. This might turn out to be a great new adventure for us; you have always liked adventures Magnus. Promise me please that you will not do anything more to reverse this, that you will let this take its course." He had added pointing towards his own chest as if to make absolutely certain that Magnus understood what he was asking.

Magnus' reply had been a simple nod and an 'okay,' and Alec had known that more convincing would be required. Since then, he had extracted other similar half-made promises every time Magnus broached the topic and offered to search for a way to undo what his father had done. Alec was determined to protect Magnus from any action borne of misplaced guilt or sense of responsibility.

It was almost two in the morning when Magnus had seen Tessa to the door. She had declined his invitation to stay with them saying that her luggage was already at Catarina's and that she and Magnus' other friend had planned to spend the day together. She had promised to come back before returning to Brazil two days later. After hugging his friend goodbye and thanking her once again for her help, Magnus had gone back to the living room and had found Alec sleeping soundly on the couch. When he had tried to wake him, Alec had not even stirred. So, Magnus had wrapped a blanket around him and after spending a few moments watching Alec's peacefully sleeping face, he had kissed him on the forehead, turned off the light and retired to the bedroom.

Magnus had taken off his clothes and stepped into the shower, wanting to get rid of the stench left by the demon. As soon as the warm shower began to wash away the grime and dirt, a dam had opened in his heart and tears had begun to flow down his face, mixing with the water and spreading throughout his body. Sobs soon followed, and his body began to suddenly shake from emotions he had not let out in perhaps hundreds of years: feelings of regret, inadequacy, self-hatred.

Magnus was not someone who sobbed or who surrendered to self-pity. He sometimes teared up, but he never cried the way he had cried that night. He had always prided himself on his emotional fortitude, a fortitude he attributed to the many sorrows of his childhood, to the years barely surviving on the streets – orphan and unclaimed – to the decades living with the distant and detached Silent Bothers. He had also always endeavoured to live a life with more joy than sorrow. That night in the shower, however, he had felt overcome by the memories of the suffering Alec had endured in the last few weeks, the memories of his own struggles and suffering, and memories of the countless times in which people had told him that one day his demon blood would be the source of his and perhaps someone else's perdition.

He had cried until his body and mind felt drained, emptied and spent, until he had exhausted all his energy and all he had left was just the strength needed to get out of the shower and drag himself to bed. Just like Alec, he had fallen asleep before he even realized it. His last conscious thought before he fell into a deep dreamless slumber was one of determination: a stubborn determination to hold on to Alec with all his strength as they both faced the new challenges that fate had put on their path.

Six weeks later, Alec was still learning how to control, manage and channel his new powers, and as most new warlocks, he was still finding out the limits and extent of his magic. Yet, Alec approached this new challenge the way he approached any other part of his Shadowhunter life: with consistency, determination, bravely and no a small amount of stubbornness. He continued to reject any of Magnus' suggestions for finding a way to reverse Asmodeus' curse, and lately, he had even begun to use the argument concerning what his new powers did for their lovemaking as a tool to dissuade Magnus. The argument was a low blow because Magnus could not deny that magic moments like the one from the night before were unforgettable and impossible to resist.

Alec remained committed to take his new condition in stride. The morning after the incident in the roof, he had arrived at the Institute almost at midday, a coffee in his hand. Despite the fact that he had slept on a sofa that was at least a foot shorter than he was, he had felt more rested than he had felt in weeks,. The late spring sunlight and the city noises had finally awoken him when the sun was already quite high on the sky. Despite knowing that work was waiting for him, Alec had laid on the sofa for a while longer, relishing in a peace and quiet that was not only the result of the silence in the apartment, but also of the internal calm he felt. There was none of the itching and buzzing that had constantly disturbed his peace and happiness in the last few weeks, and there was none of the exhaustion that supressing the energy flowing through him had caused. He had felt as if a great weight had been lifted and as if parts of himself that had been at war with each other were finally ready to make peace.

Alec had spent the rest of the day working, occupied in the many tasks that made up his life as a Shadowhunter and as head of the New York Institute: meetings with Downworld leaders, assigning patrol duties, planning for new recruit training. In the afternoon, he had called Magnus and when the warlock picked up, asked him if he wanted to go out for that dinner he had promised him the day before.

"Are you asking me out on a date Alexander?" Magnus had asked him and even though Magnus' voice was playful, Alec could still hear a trace of sadness in the warlock's tone.

"I guess I am," Alec had replied. "I must warn you though, it is not my practice to invite my dates home until at least the fifth date."

"That's a shame," Magnus had replied, and his voice suggested that he was thinking of all the possible ways in which the evening could end. "I guess I am going to have to find ways to get you in my bed Shadowhunter."

At that moment, someone had knocked on Alec's door and before Alec had a chance to reply, Jace had walked in, a tablet in one hand and a pile of papers in the other. Despite his attempts at self-control, he was sure his brother had noticed that he was blushing. "Okay then, should we meet at the restaurant?"

"You have the face of the kid who got caught with his hand in the cookie jar," Jace had teased him and Alec had gotten even redder.

That night they had gone to dinner to one of their favourite restaurants, and then met with Jace, Izzy and Clary for drinks and a few rounds of pool. Yet several times during the evening, one of them had thought that being out was not a good idea. For from the very moment they saw one another outside the restaurant, their evening became the combination of an act of seduction and an exercise in restrain. The air between them felt electrically charged, and every time their fingers brushed against each other's skin, their shoulders touched, or they looked at one another, the hairs in the back of their necks stood on end, goosebumps rose on their skin and butterflies stirred in the pit of their stomachs.

More than once, Alec had thought that that was the wrong evening to be out, that that evening was an evening to be at home lost in the arms of his lover. Magnus, on his part, had kept wishing that he could reach and touch Alec, grab his hand, put his arms around his shoulders. He had wished that Alec was not the respectable leader of the New York Shadowhunters with a reputation to maintain and an image to keep. He had even cursed those deep brown eyes that kept looking at him with desire plainly written in them and that alluring smile that kept putting all kinds of ideas in his mind.

"If you keep looking at me that way," he had whispered in Alec's ear during a break in their pool game, "I am going to do something to you on this pool table that is going to scandalize even the most adventurous Downworlders here."

Instead of replying, Alec had turned towards his parabatai and announced that he and Magnus were calling it a night, that he was tired and needed a good night sleep. "I may take the morning off tomorrow," he had then told Jace on his way out, and Jace's smile had told him he understood perfectly why Alec was leaving.

They had walked home through the park, the evening warm and dry, a fresh freeze sending the scent of the first of the season's honeysuckle in their direction. Except for a few small comments, they were for the most part quiet. Yet, their silence was not uncomfortable; it rather had the feeling of the kinds of silences of those who knew each other so well that words were not required.

When they reached the Angel of the Waters fountain, Alec had stopped and turning, had taken Magnus' hand, the gesture putting an end to the anticipation they had felt for the touch of the other. Magnus looked down at their interlaced fingers and then back at Alec with surprise because Alec was not the kind of man who engaged in public displays of affection. Taking advantage of Magnus' surprise, Alec had leaned in and kissed him, completely oblivious and unconcerned about anyone who might be watching them, not caring that they were not glamored.

The kiss had had such an effect on Magnus that he felt that if he could put his very soul in it, he would. Alec had wrapped his free hand around Magnus' waist and pulled him even closer, their bodies coming alive at the contact, and Magnus had lost all capacity for thought. The sound of the city, the praying eyes of the other people who were walking through the park at that moment, the scent of honeysuckle all disappeared, and only Alec and Magnus had existed in the world at that moment. Magnus lifted his free hand and rested it on Alec's chest, the sensation of the power emanating from Alec's mark almost singing and calling to Magnus.

"I have been wanting to do this all night," Alec had whispered during a break in their kissing. "You kept looking at me with those enchanting eyes of yours and I thought that I would certainly lose my mind if I didn't kiss you."

Magnus' answer was to pull Alec closer again, claiming those lips and letting Alec claim his.

That night in front of the Angel of the Water fountain, Alec had brought up the issue of marriage for the first time. He had said that he knew that Nephilim law did not allow for same-sex marriage or for the marriage between a Nephilim and a Downworlder. But, if Magnus would consider spending the rest of Alec's life with him, and if he was willing to wait, Alec would do all in his power and more to change the law and get his people to accept their union.

"Alexander, we do not need a piece of paper to confirm our commitment to one another," Magnus had argued, "and you are still young. Your feelings may change." Magnus had placed a hand against Alec's cheek, his eyes shining with unexpressed emotion.

"I know my own heart Magnus," Alec had replied. "I know I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want you to be the person that gets called if I am ever in an accident or injured. I want you to be the one who, when I am too old and frail, gets to make decisions on my behalf. I want my people never to doubt our commitment towards one another. For whatever number of years that we may have together, I want us to be a family under the law. I just ask that you give me time to work on changing that law."

"Do you think that is going to change the way other Nephilim feel about us?" Magnus had asked.

"Is that what concerns you?" had been Alec's answer. "Because if my people cannot accept our union, I will resign as Head of the Institute and leave the Shadowhunters if that is what it takes for you to be happy."

"I do not want you to do anything, Alexander, nothing that will make you unhappy, and I do not want you to have regrets one day."

"The only thing that can ever cause me regret is if I do not do all in my power to make you happy Magnus," Alec had replied. "I just ask for a little time to try to change the law." Without waiting for a response, Alec had leaned in and kissed Magnus once again, his lips sweet and tender, his hand soft and steady in Magnus' hand.

After a long while of slow kissing, and fearing that if they did not continue on their way home they would certainly scandalize anyone walking around the fountain, they had resumed their journey. They had walked hand in hand the rest of the way, completely unconcerned about anyone who may look their way, content and at peace in each other's company. When they had gotten home, Alec had not let go of Magnus hand, and instead had led him straight into the bedroom and to a night of unhurried and uncontained passion and surrender.

"I want to welcome the morning in your arms warlock," Alec had whispered in Magnus' ear as he slowly peeled Magnus' clothes off. "I want this night to last forever."

That night, they had made love like those lovers who know exactly how to extract the most pleasure from one another's body; how to give and how to take without greed or request; when to stop and when to continue; when to possess and when to relinquish. They had spent the whole night in each other's arms, and in the process, they had closed the last of the wounds left by weeks of separation, struggles and secrecy.

"I am yours Alexander," Magnus had said at one point, his heart beating so fast and hard that he was sure it would break free from his chest, his body and Alec's body one connected muscle. "I do not need a piece of paper to tie my heart to yours."

"And I am yours Magnus," Alec had replied, "and while I do not need that piece of paper either, I would still like to have it."

Alec had not brought up the topic marriage again since that night. That is, until this morning when he had so certainly stated that Magnus would one day pose the question.

"What makes you so sure that I will be the one to ask you?" Magnus said. "The law has not changed; marriage between us is still illegal."

"I am a hundred percent sure," Alec replied, and his smile contained not a small amount of smugness.

"You do know Alexander that divination is not a very credible warlock skill, don't' you?" Magnus teased him. "Even those warlocks that profess to possess the gift say that it is an inexact science at the best of times. And, I am sorry to say but I don't think you have the gift of predicting the future."

"Call it informed guesswork," Alec replied. "I'll tell you one more thing: it will happen after we have a very big fight. You will realize that I am not going anywhere and that you are not going anywhere and that, even if we have to elope and get married under mundane law, we may as well make it legal."

Magnus laughed, shook his head indulgently, and then leaned in for a swift kiss. At least it was meant to be swift, for as soon as his lips touched Alec's, Alec grabbed him by the front of his t-shirt and, with his usual speed and dexterity, pulled him closer. Their lips parted for just a moment to allow for Magnus to catch his breath, but then Alec shifted his gaze from Magnus' eyes down to his lips, in that gesture of delicious anticipation and promise that always awoke the butterflies in the pit of Magnus' stomach, and Magnus knew surrender was his only option.

Magnus and Alec got lost in the sensation of their lips melting and merging, of their tongues initiating an already familiar dance, of their bodies awakening and calling for one another. Book and manuscript fell to the ground and cups of coffee and half-finished breakfasts were soon forgotten. T-shirts suffered a similar fate a few moments later and became casualties of Magnus and Alec's desire for the feel of bare skin. Alec shifted down on the sofa and pulled Magnus even closer until the warlock's body laid completely on top of him.

"Thank the Angel for weekends off," Magnus whispered between gasps, the feel of Alec's hands rounding his behind and pulling him even closer threatening to erase all coherent thought.

"Don't you have work to do?" Alec asked between kisses on Magnus' neck.

"I think I have more pressing things to do," Magnus teased, and then, shifted his attention away from Alec's neck and down to the hollow at the base of his throat. In a motion that Alec suspected was meant to drive him mad, Magnus began a slow journey with his tongue down Alec's sternum, in search for that silver mark that had become so incredibly sensitive.

"That feels…," Alec exclaimed between gasps when Magnus' tongue finally reached the eight-point star on Alec's chest and began a swirling motion meant to tease and torment. "…I don't have words to describe how that feels… Magnus."

In any case, words were unnecessary, for Magnus had learned in the last few weeks just how sensitive Alec's warlock mark was. He had learned that whenever he wanted Alec to abandon any sense of self-control, all he needed to do was to concentrate his attentions on those special spots on Alec's chest or back.

Alec had asked him once whether all warlocks made love this way, whether he, Magnus, had ever experienced this with any other of Lilith's Children. Alec had not asked about Magnus' previous lovers in a long time, and the question had caught Magnus by surprise. They had been sitting on the sofa in front of the fire one evening and when Magnus turned to look at Alec in the eyes, Alec saw the answer plainly written in Magnus' astonished expression.

"Alexander, you must know that I have never experienced those sensations before in my life, never and with no one," Magnus had replied. "You are the first and only person with whom I have ever felt this way."

"I am glad," Alec had replied, his smile loving and just a little too smug, "because you are also my first and only. There will never be anyone else."

Now, as he delineated the contours of the silvery star with his proficient tongue, Magnus was hit once again with the realization, or rather conviction, that there would never be anyone else for him, that no matter how many centuries he lived, this young Shadowhunter would also be his one and only.

Before he lost his own self-control, Magnus stood up and extended his hand to Alec. "Come Shadowhunter, we do not want to scandalize the neighbours even more."

Magnus guided Alec towards their bathroom, and once there, he turned on the shower, making sure the water was at the right temperature. Before he could turn and reach for Alec's hand and pull him into the immense shower stall, Alec embraced him from behind, the sensation of Alec's strong arms comforting and familiar, the feel of Alec's kisses and gentle nibbles along his neck maddening.

Magnus and Alec spent the rest of that Saturday morning the way many couples in love do: lost in the sensation of leisurely making love to their soulmate under the shower and then in bed, feeling absolutely complete and fulfilled, needing nothing else than the feel and taste of each other's lips, fingers and skin, wanting nothing more than to reaffirm their commitment to one another.

They were in their bed a while later, lying side by side, waiting for their heartbeats to slow down and their breathing to settle. "I don't know how you do it, Alexander, but you manage to make come undone every time," Magnus said, turning to look at Alec and propping himself on one elbow. "Who taught you how to do that?"

"You did Magnus," Alec replied with a broad self-satisfactory smile. "I haven't said this to you before," he added, and his expression was suddenly more serious, "I am sorry that at the beginning I was insecure and jealous of your previous lovers. It was childish of me. I am thankful to all those people with whom you shared your life before me. For they helped you become the amazing man you are today and because they taught you how to love me and touch me the way you do."

"Nothing and no one could have ever prepared me for you Alexander. The relationship we have is one of kind."

"And that is why you will ask me to marry you one day, Magnus," Alec said once again. "We are destined to become a family you and I."

"We already are a family," Magnus replied and leaned in to kiss Alec once again.

It took five years for Alec's prediction to come true. During that time, Magnus and Alec built a life together, as normal a life as a warlock and a Nephilim-warlock hybrid could ever built. They fought side by side in many battles, defeated countless demons, saved each other's lives and the lives of their loved ones several times, and more than once dwarfed evil ploys to destroy the Nephilim, the Downworld, or the mundane world. In time, they became a force to reckon with, evidence of the strength of Nephilim and Downworld working together, the example many used to challenge the Nephilim's bigoted prejudices.

They also did other more ordinary things together like buying a car; Magnus teaching Alec how to drive and taking him to get his driver's license; putting both their names on the purchase of a bigger apartment; having friends over for dinner; going on vacations; doing their laundry; caring for each other when sick; listing their names as next of kin on paperwork. In time, no one, not even the most conservative and prejudiced of Nephilim could think of Alec without Magnus.

Alec's prediction came true exactly as he had foreseen it. It was late winter and for weeks, they had been on the hunt for the greater demon Gressil, who had somehow escaped hell and was targeting young men in the Bronx, killing them in the bloodiest of ways. Gressill's tactic was to tempt his victims by offering them what they most desired and then killing them just at the moment in which they thought their wish was within their grasp.

The pursuit had been particularly frustrating because no matter what the Shadowhunters did, or what summoning spells Magnus used, Gressil constantly avoided them, disappearing just at the moment when they thought they had him trapped. Magnus finally cornered him in a dark alley one night. While he waited for Alec and his team, Magnus used his powers to keep Gressil contained within the pentagram he had hastily drawn in the ground.

"I know what ails your heart demon son," Gressil said, his demonic force pushing and pulling against the boundaries of the pentagram, testing the limits of Magnus' powers. "I know what you most desire and I can give it to you."

"You don't know anything," Magnus replied and extending his arms even wider, resisted Gressil's attempts to get free.

"You desire a cure for your Nephilim boy," Gressil stated and his smile was an ugly mask of malice and temptation. "You have seen what Asmodeus' curse is doing to your Shadowhunter and there is nothing your heart wants more than to revert it. I can give you what you want; I have the power to undo the curse."

That was all it took for Magnus to lose some of his grip on the demon trap, just a split second of hesitation, just a moment in which Magnus was tempted to take Gressil' offer. For the demon was correct: he had seen the latest result of Asmodeus' punishment.

It had been an ordinary morning a few weeks before. Alec had been in the bathroom shaving before work and Magnus had walked in, wrapped his arms around the Shadowhunter and rested his chin on his shoulder. He had then looked up at their reflection in the mirror, a naughty comment of some sort already forming in his lips. But then the comment had frozen in his mouth and his heart had suddenly sunk to the bottom of his stomach. For when he looked closely at Alec's reflection he had seen there what, for the last five years, he had feared to the point of nightmares. He had managed somehow to gather his emotions, hide his despair and force a smile to lift the corners of his mouth. However, since then Magnus had felt an ever-increasing sense of desperation and guilt, a desperation and guilt he had not felt since Alec was trapped in the Seven Circle five years before.

Now Gressil was offering him hope, perhaps the solution he had most searched for, that which he most desired. "How do I know you are speaking the truth?" he asked, his mind already running through all possible scenarios that might allow him both to force Gressil to give him the cure and to still vanish him back to hell.

Magnus should have known better, but he was weak and desperate, and at that one moment of hesitation and temptation, Gressil felt the strength of the demon trap weaken and falter. It was no more than a second, but that was all Gressil needed to get a grip on freedom. The demon pushed with all his strength against the trap, forcing Magnus to redouble his efforts to keep him contained. Magnus tuned out all distractions and fixed his attention solely on keeping Gressil caged. As a result, he did not hear Alec and his team approach through the entrance to the alley until it was too late.

"Give me the cure for Asmodeus' curse, or you will find out what I am capable of," Magnus said between clenched teeth.

Gressil knew then that he had won, that there was no way the warlock would be able to keep him trapped for long. For the key to Gressil's power was his capacity to tempt men, to offer what they want most; for he fed on weakness borne of unfulfilled desire. And, at that moment, Magnus was giving him precisely the strength he needed to defeat him.

Magnus felt a sudden increase in Gressil's power, and while he tried to match the demon's strength with his own and to reign in his self-control, it was too late. Gressil gave a mighty push and broke his retrains and Magnus felt himself being pushed backward with unbelievable force. He hit a wall behind him with the force and speed of a bullet and collapsed to the ground. His last thoughts before losing consciousness, were of confusion, regret and dejection.

Gressil got free that night, and as he escaped, he badly injured and almost killed two young members of Alec's team. He did not get to kill another mundane, however, and Alec and his team, with Catarina's assistance, finally trapped him and vanished him twenty-four hours later. Magnus did not learn this until after the fact because he spent the following twenty-four hours under Tessa's care, unconscious, suffering from extreme power depletion and a contusion.

Magnus was sitting on the couch drinking one of Tessa's fortifying potions when Alec walked in, carrying along the stench of sulfur that was so characteristic of demons. Magnus took just one look at Alec and knew that the Shadowhunter was more furious at Magnus than he had ever seen him.

"Tessa, I need to have a word with Magnus and I do not think you want to hear this," Alec said, his tone dead serious.

"That's fine," said Tessa, who had already spent the last few hours admonishing Magnus to her heart's content. "I am meeting Catarina for dinner. I will see you later Magnus, bye Alec," she added and put an affectionate hand on Alec's arm before walking out the door, leaving Alec and Magnus to have the biggest fight of their relationship.

"How could you do this Magnus?" Alec started. "You promised me that you would stop looking for a way to revert my transformation. Why can you not accept that I am happy with the way things are? You could have died, Gressil could have killed you, and what would I have done then?"

Magnus argued that he had seen an opportunity to give Alec his life back and he taken it. That it was true that he had not counted on Gressil's strength and cunning, but that he had had to take the chance to give Alec back what he had lost. "I did this to you Alec; I had to try to fix it," he said.

"There is nothing to fix Magnus!" Alec interrupted, his face red with anger and frustration. "And because of your stubbornness, two of my people were gravely injured. If they had died, I would have had to be the one to tell their loved ones that they would not be coming home. All because you cannot love yourself with all that you are, and because of that, you cannot love me with all that I am." Alec knew that the comment was a low blow, but he was angry and angry people do not always measure their words.

"That is unfair, Alec," Magnus replied. "I will not sit here and be judged by someone who has experienced what it is like to be warlock for all of five minutes, specially someone whose people had made it their mission in life to look down on people like me." Magnus had also known that the comment was un-called for, but he too was angry and hurt.

That night Alec and Magnus argued fiercely and when they both run out of recriminations, accusations and resentments, Magnus told Alec that he did not want to see him right now. "Well, I do not want to see you either," Alec replied and walked out of the apartment, the door banging loudly on his way out.

For next two nights, Alec slept, or rather tried to sleep, at the institute. Magnus did not call him, and he did not call the warlock either. They were both angry, hurt and full of regrets. They were not the kind of couples that violently argued, or that said hurtful things to one another. They had always resolved their disagreements with a commitment to talking things through and finding a fair solution, a solution with which they could both live. In the heat of anger, they had both said hurtful things, things that perhaps they had both felt in the deepest corners of their hearts but that they had never voiced for fear of hurting the one they loved.

On the third evening, Alec finally went home, and Magnus was waiting for him. He walked in the room with the same silent and decisive steps with which he had walked in the first night he kissed Magnus. Like that first night, rather than saying anything, he simply took Magnus' hand, leaned in and kissed him. The kiss was tender, completely sincere and had the feeling of those kisses that are pregnant with emotions that cannot be expressed in words: love, regret, sorrow and immense devotion and acceptance.

"When did you know Magnus?" Alec asked, his forehead leaning against Magnus' forehead.

"That morning when I walked into the bathroom and you were shaving. When _did you_ know Alexander?" Magnus asked in return.

"About a week before that," Alec replied.

It had been a Tuesday like any other, and Alec had been walking down the street towards a meeting of the Downworld council. He had caught sight of his reflection in a window and had suddenly stopped. He had looked again and thought that perhaps his reflection was distorted by some particular quality of the glass. But when he got back to the Institute and looked at himself in the mirror in his office's bathroom, he had known that what he was seeing was not an optical illusion. It was not something explicitly different or wrong about the way he looked. It was rather something in the quality of his reflection, in the way in which the mirror seemed to capture his image in ice, as if he was looking at himself through a cool blue filter.

At that moment Alec had known; he had known that while he would never be younger than he was at that moment, he would never look older either, no matter how long he lived; he had known that his transformation was finally complete; that the clock had stopped for him; that he would no longer age. His first impulse was to immediately call Magnus, but he had known even then that this new development would be a terrible blow for his partner. So, he had kept quiet, wanting, once again, to spare Magnus unnecessary suffering.

"I am sorry Magnus," he now said, "I did not mean to blame you for the injuries Gressil inflicted on my team members and I did not meant to imply that you did not love yourself or me. I know you love me."

"You were right Alexander," Magnus interrupted, tears running down his cheek in response to similar tears overflowing Alec's eyes. "I have always had a hard time accepting the demonic blood that runs through my veins. That is why I did not want this for you, but that does not mean that I do not feel the luckiest man in the whole universe for having you in my life. Please forgive me for scaring you, for what I did, and for what it caused your people."

"I know that the process of becoming a warlock was hard for you Magnus," Alec said. "But you have made the process so different and easier for me. As a result, I do not hate or regret who I am, and for that I love you. I love you, not despite, but because of everything that you are and for everything you give me. I would not change anything about you… well, except for your stubbornness." Alec smiled broadly, and Magnus corresponded with a similar smile. A weight seemed to lift from both their chests; for they knew, as they had perhaps known all along, that they would be fine.

Before Magnus could say anything else, Alec kissed him deeply, unguardedly and completely without resentment. Magnus surrendered to the kiss and to the love that this incredible man offered him so openly and so freely.

"Can we go to our bed now Magnus?" Alec asked after he had thoroughly kissed Magnus until he felt drunk in the scent and taste of the Shadowhunter. "I am not used to the beds in the Institute anymore. So, I haven't slept in more than two days."

"That couch is very uncomfortable too, you know?" Magnus replied and taking Alec by the hand lead him to their bed.

The following evening, Magnus asked Alec out to dinner and afterwards suggested a walk on the park. It was a cool night, winter still lingering in the air, but their walk was pleasant nonetheless. They eventually reached the Angel of the Waters fountain and, like Alec had done five years before, Magnus turned, took his boyfriend's hand and catching Alec by surprise, kissed him deeply and unselfconsciously.

"Alexander, you predicted this moment quite accurately five years ago," Magnus said once their lips parted. The expression of puzzlement in Alec's eyes told him that the Shadowhunter had no clue of the direction the conversation was taking. "You said that one day, after a big fight, I would ask something of you." Alec expression slowly changed from confusion to dawning realization. "So, now I must ask: Alexander Lightwood would you do me the immense honor of accepting me as your husband?"

Magnus thought that if a smile could capture the brilliance of the sun, it would be the smile that Alec was now giving him. For it was a smile capable to illuminating and warming the darkness corners of his soul. Alec leaned in and kissed Magnus, and the kiss seemed to contain the Shadowhunter's whole heart.

"I am going to need an explicit answer, Alexander," Magnus said once Alec finally relinquished control of his lips.

"Of course, I will marry you Magnus Bane," Alec finally replied, his voice full emotion and his eyes glowing like pools of gold in the darkness. "I promise to honor and protect you with my very life and as long as I draw breath, and to make sure you never regret trusting me with your heart."

Six weeks later, Jem Carstairs married Magnus and Alec under mundane and Nephilim laws. They had a small ceremony by the river on Luke's farm, their Nephilim, Downworld and mundane friends and family as witnesses. Alec and Magnus wore black suits, Alec over a black shirt, and Magnus over a white one. Alec wore a golden tie, and using a simple spell Magnus had taught him, added a few golden strands to his hair. Magnus wore a silver tie and his hair displayed considerably more silvery glitter.

Jace was Alec's suggenes and Catarina was Magnus'. The ceremony took place at the moment that the sun was setting in the west and the full moon was rising in the east – a rare meeting of silver and gold. True to Nephilim tradition and determined to have their union recognized and respected by the Angel's chosen as he had fought so hard to accomplish, Alec asked Magnus to draw a wedded union rune above his heart. Then using a magic spell of his own design, Alec made a similar mark above Magnus' own heart, sealing their marriage and confirming their love.

"Magnus and Alec have also asked to be wedded according to mundane law," Jem announced once the running part of the ceremony was completed. "They will now exchange rings and their own vows."

Magnus and Alec faced each other, and each took one of the rings Magnus had made for them five years ago, the same rings that ensured that they would find one another even in the darkest of places and most dire of situations. Then using the words of Neruda, they professed their love and commitment to one another and for all to hear.

"Alexander, I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where," Magnus started and with shaking hands he slid the ring along Alec's finger. He then placed his hand above the new rune over Alec's heart.

"Magnus, I love you simply, without problems or pride," Alec responded as he too placed the ring on Magnus' finger and then rested his own hand above the mark he had made over the warlock's heart.

"I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this," Magnus continued and his voiced trembled a little.

"I love you in a way in which there is no I or you." Alec tried his upmost to control the emotions that seemed to be pushing their way into his words.

"So intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand," Magnus added…

"So intimate that when you fall asleep my eyes close," Alec concluded.

Alec reached with his free hand and dried Magnus' tears away, and, smiling, Magnus did the same to Alec, the gestures intimate, tender and completely unselfconscious.

"By the power vested on me by the State of New York, I pronounced you married under the law," Jem then declared. "Magnus and Alec, you may kiss," he added even though his permission was completely unnecessary. Magnus had already closed the remaining distance between him and Alec to kiss him, the kiss communicating emotions that neither of them could find words to express.

"Friends," Jem then stated as he addressed the audience, "it is my great honor to introduce to you Alexander Lightwood-Bane and Magnus Bane-Lightwood. Please join me in wishing them a very long and happy life together."

This is how Magnus and Alec sealed their union and began their married life. In many ways, and except for a short and intimate honeymoon in a small private island in Hawaii, and for Alec's insistence that Magnus be listed as his husband in all official and non-official Nephilim records, their lives did not change much in the years after the got married. They had, after all, already intertwined their destinies a long time ago and by the time they walked down the aisle, they knew without a doubt that they would love and honor one another for all eternity.

Alec continued to serve as Head of the New York Institute and over time was the originator of many positive changes in Nephilim-Downworld relations. Magnus continued providing his warlock services and to work with Alec in strengthening the relationships between the different species that made the Downworld.

Things did not change significantly in their lives until a terrible and violent night five years later, when among the burning ruins of the Montevideo Institute, with her last breath Mariana Almendros, a brave Shadowhunter, bestowed on them the gift that finally began to complete their family. After that night, Magnus and Alec embarked in a new journey, a journey that many times they thought was the most challenging adventure of their lives. In the process, Alec finally learned to fish and eventually taught the skill to his own children. He also got to experience what an ordinary mundane life was like, or at least as ordinary as it was possible for someone like him who was also married to a warlock.

 **This chapter still needs quite a bit of work and I may make some edits later. But I am travelling for studies in a couple of days and I did not want to leave without posting this chapter.**

 **I have one more to write before I called this epic story concluded. Thanks once again for reading.**


	19. Chapter 19 - Epilogue: Homebound

**Epilogue: Homebound**

Twenty-seven years later…

"Professor Lightwood!" a young female voice called.

 _Mundies,_ Alec thought with a sigh, _always appearing at the worst possible time_. With a swift movement of his hand, he snatched the fire message from where it hovered a couple of centimeters above his head, and as he turned to greet whomever was calling him, put the sheet of paper in his jacket pocket.

The young woman calling him looked momentarily startled. She had obviously seen the flaming paper bird that had a moment ago appeared out of thin air and flown in Alec's direction. But then, as it happened when most mundanes got brief glimpses of the shadow world, denial won over hard evidence. The young woman shook her head faintly and, obviously convincing herself that she was the victim of her own imagination and not wanting Professor Lightwood to think she was unhinged, tentatively smiled at Alec.

The young woman had been waiting inside the café ever since Professor Lightwood's lecture ended a few minutes ago, hoping for a few moments alone with one of the handsomest, most popular, and most successful professors in the Comparative Literature Department at Berkeley. Attractiveness, popularity and success were qualities that the young woman considered equally important when it came to assessing someone's sex appeal, and Professor Lightwood possessed them in abundance. No wonder his classes were always full, and that most female students, and likely some male ones, looked at the professor like he was a delicious morsel of food. Who cared that he was likely as old as her father; she did not discriminate in that regards. Besides, Professor Lightwood with that muscular tall body and that almost ageless face looked nothing like her father.

Since the beginning of the term, the young woman had sat in the front row of Professor Lightwood's Thursday afternoon lecture, at a spot that was impossible to miss. She had chosen her attire carefully every time, her ensembles revealing enough to make even a dead man come to attention. She had also made a few clever remarks and asked a couple of pointed questions during lecture, enough to give the impression that she was smart, but not enough to appear overbearing. The Professor had acknowledged her a few times and had on a couple occasions smiled at her as he entered the room, and those gestures had fueled the young woman's determination. She had heard some classmates comment that the professor stopped for a coffee and an hour or so of work every Thursday at this very café. She had observed him do so for the last two weeks and had chosen today as the day she would finally approach him.

When the tall handsome professor entered the café, the young woman had sat up straight, smoothed the front of her very tight and almost see-through shirt and run a swift hand through her long blond hair. Professor Lightwood had walked to the counter and, after handing a bill to the teller, collected a paper tray with two lattes, which the barista – a young man with thin dreadlocks that stuck in all directions – had already brewed in evident anticipation of the customer's arrival. Professor Lightwood had smiled and exchanged a few pleasantries with the café's employees, but rather than seating as he usually did, and to the young woman's surprise, had turned and walked in long sinewy strides towards the exit door.

"Professor Lightwood!" she had called as she quickly got up from her seat and followed the professor to the exit. The sudden change in plans had surprised her but she was not yet ready to give up.

"Professor Lightwood," she had called a second time, as she opened the door and followed the professor out of the building. He was already halfway down the stairs that lead to the entrance to Eucalyptus Grove. "Can I have a mom-moment…?" she added, the last word coming out with a stutter. For a split second, the young woman had thought she saw something glow like fire a few centimeters above the professor's head, something that she would have sworn looked like a burning bird. It must have been a trick of the light or her imagination, for when she looked again, all she saw was a piece of white paper in the professor's hand. _I must cut down on the coffee,_ she thought, _it is making me see things._

Professor Lightwood turned, put the piece of paper in his pocket and looked at the young woman with deep brown eyes that she was sure were capable of melting ice.

"What can I do for you miss…?" Professor Lightwood asked.

"Chastity Williams," replied the young woman, as she descended the remaining steps and came to stand a step above the tall handsome man. "My friends call me Chaste." Chaste thought that up close the professor was even hotter than at a distance with big brown eyes that seemed to look right into her; salt and pepper hair that became almost white around the temples; laugh lines around his eyes and around his well-defined lips, and long fingers that he now had wrapped around a paper tray containing two cups of coffee. The thought of what Professor Lightwood was capable of doing with those long fingers made her blush and she had to reign in her composure before she started hyperventilating.

Alec gazed down at his feet, making a grand effort to stifle yet another sigh. He wondered whether this child's parents had imagined their baby girl walking around dressed – or rather undressed – like that when they named her, or that one day chastity would be the last thing in her mind. It then occurred to Alec that Magnus would have a field day if he learned of this exchange. Every year his husband bet him on the number of students – and sometimes new colleagues – who would try to flirt with Alec. No matter how many years passed and how much younger than him the students got, Magnus always won the wager.

"What can I do for you Miss Williams?" Alec asked in the most professional and distant tone he could manage without appearing rude. She was, after all a student, someone he had a role in educating. When he looked back at the girl again, he thought that the young student with her tight jeans, her exposed navel and her extremely revealing t-shirt could be his daughter. He doubted though that Sofie would ever approach an older man with Chastity Williams' intentions. Sofie would find the gesture and the outfit demeaning, a symptom of what she would call the ever-enduring patriarchal structures of power. Nope, thought Alec, thanks the Angel, his daughter was too strong, self-contained and mature for this kind of behavior.

"I was hoping to speak with you about your expectations for the final assignment," Chaste replied with a smile that she expected contained the right combination of flirtatiousness, coyness and mystery. She then rolled a lock of hair around her finger in a gesture that never failed to call attention.

"I answer assignment questions during class, Miss William."

"Please call me Chaste," Chaste insisted. "I am rather shy. I would prefer to discuss my questions in private," she hesitantly added as she batted her eyelashes in a suggestive way. "I would like to get some clarification; I really want to get a good grade."

Alec resisted the impulse to laugh out loud, for he doubted very much that shyness was a defining feature of Chaste' character. If Chaste had paid closer attention she would have noticed the effort Alec made to stop himself from sighing and rolling his eyes, but she was obviously oblivious to the fact that her flirtations were lost on him.

"Miss Williams," Alec replied, putting special emphasis on addressing the young woman in the most formal of ways. He had learned a long time ago to deal with these kinds of encounters. "I suggest that you speak first with my teaching assistant and if you still have questions after that, bring them to next week's lecture. Other students might benefit from them." _Make every moment a teachable moment_ , Alec thought, remembering the lessons he had learned from his own mentors.

"Oh, ah," Chaste stumbled, "I would prefer to speak to you directly and in private. I am not good at speaking up in class," she insisted, and Alec thought that if she continued batting her eyelashes that way, she would definitely take flight. "It would only take a few minutes; perhaps I can buy you a cup of coffee." The fact that Alec already had a tray with two cups in his hand seemed to be lost on Chaste. A refusal was not the answer she had expected and, thus, had to improvise. She could not fathom why this man was acting as if he was oblivious to her charms.

"I am sorry Miss Williams," Alec replied as he looked at his watch. "But I am afraid this would have to wait until class. I am in a rush and _my husband_ would not like it if I am late for our getaway weekend." He then gave the young woman a courteous nod, turned and walked away. If he had looked back at least once, he would have seen the look of utter surprise in Chastity Williams' face and the way her jaw dropped almost to her chest, but Alec had a strict policy when it came to disappointing students' expectations; he never laughed at their embarrassment.

A few meters away, he stopped and sat on a park bench by the entrance to Eucalyptus Grove and took the fire message from his pocket. He did not need to read the whole content; he already knew what it contained. For it was not the first such message he had received in the last couple of weeks. The Clave was calling him back to duty; they had left him alone for long enough and they now wanted him back. He did look at the bottom of the page though, at the words inscribed in ink right below the signature and seal of the newly appointed Consul, the only part of the message that was new. A few words were clearly legible there, words written in his brother's unmistakable scribble, words with the power of twisting destinies: " _You took a solemn oath when you left, brother, that if I ever needed you, you would come back; I need you now."_

Alec read the words a second time, the words with which Consul Jace Herondale, his brother and parabatai, was reminding him of his oath, an oath that even after seventeen years still carried the same power than the night in which he had first sworn it.

The gentle touch of a familiar gaze on him, like the caress of butterfly wings, made Alec look up and glance in the direction of the parking lot. There several meters away, Magnus was waiting, leaning against the hood of their silver convertible, looking as handsome and lovely as ever despite the glamor than concealed his agelessness. He had his hands in the front pocket of his black jeans. His light blue linen shirt hugged his muscular body perfectly. His hair, a little less spiky and glittery than he used to wear it and which he he had peppered with stylish gray highlights, blew in the freeze, and the afternoon sun made his skin glow even more golden. Magnus' glamoured eyes shone in a way that even after twenty-two years of marriage had not lost their power over Alec. A few passersby, men and women, looked at Magnus with appreciative expressions, obviously unable to resist the mysterious pull of his husband's magnetism. But Magnus, as usual, only had eyes for him, just like Alec could never have eyes for anyone else.

Alec sighed and smiled. He put the fire message back in his pocket, stood up and walked in the direction of his husband, determined to postpone the inevitable moment of decision a little longer, Chastity Williams completely forgotten.

"Have you been waiting long?" he asked when he reached Magnus. He then offered him one of coffee cups and took the other for himself. Knowing that Magnus liked his coffee hot, Alec snapped his fingers and sent a few silver sparkles into his husband's coffee cup magically warming the liquid within.

"Long enough," Magnus replied with a coy smile. "So, Chaste Williams?"

"Didn't anyone tell you, Magnus, that eavesdropping is a very bad habit, especially when using magic?"

"I could not help myself, Alexander," Magnus replied, and he took a sip from his coffee cup. "I wanted to know my competition."

"I am very sorry Magnus," Alec said, a feign tone of regret in his voice, "I didn't want you to find out this way, but Chaste and I are in love."

"It was bound to happen one of these days," Magnus replied as he brought one hand up to his heart and sighed loudly. "I knew that one day you would not be able to resist your students' advances any longer."

"What is going on with these students?!" Alec asked giving up all pretense, his tone one of puzzlement and frustration. "They get younger and younger every year, and no matter how old I look, they are not deterred."

"What can I say Alexander? Middle age suits you and many of these youngsters, especially the women, have father issues."

"Well in that case, next year I will grow a white beard that will reach all the way down to my very prominent beer belly."

"Not a beer belly, please," Magnus pleaded as he stifled a laugh. "So, if my numbers are correct, Miss Williams makes five this year."

"If you say so," Alec replied with a resigned sigh.

"In that case, you owe me dinner."

"Only if you tell me how many men and women have made advances on you," Alec rebutted.

"A gentleman has no memory, Alexander. So, do you want to drive or shall I?" Magnus added as he leaned away from the car and presented Alec with the keys.

"You drive," Alec replied, "I can take over later if you get tired." Alec knew how much Magnus enjoyed driving their convertible on the highway, the feel of speedily maneuvering around cars, the sensation of freedom that came over them every time they managed to carve a weekend away and go to the cottage.

"Very well," Magnus said as he walked towards the driver side and got in. Alec mirrored the movements and got in through the passenger side.

"Did you bring my bag?" Alec asked glancing towards the small space behind the front seat. "I had some books that I would like to start reading."

"Yes, everything is here," Magnus replied.

"Did the kids get off okay?" Alec then enquired as Magnus turned on the ignition and backed out of the parking spot.

"Everybody left without any hiccups," Magnus replied. "Joshua left first, Kaya opened the portal for him. Our daughter's skills are developing amazingly fast. Joshua still teased her though, told her that one of these days she would send him to the moon by mistake. But a minute after stepping through, he called from Luke's farm to tell me that he had 'surprisingly' arrived in one peace." Magnus drew air quotes around the word 'surprisingly' with the index and middle finger of the hand not holding the steering wheel. "Our son has a flair for the dramatic."

"I wonder whom he got that from," Alec replied with a playful smile. "He is the youngest," he added, "and was born with a gentle soul. How about Mat and Sofie?"

"Matt left after school. He was looking forward to a weekend of working on college applications with his study group. I don't know why he bothers. He already got early admission to Berkeley medical."

"You know Harvard and Oxford are his first choices," Alec replied, his eyes on the landscape. "He wants to go to his father's alma mater." He then smiled, and Magnus saw deep and barely concealed pride on Alec's face.

"Kaya and Sofie left soon after," Magnus continued. "Izzy and the cousins were waiting for them to start their survival training weekend in the Canyon. I am sure they will come back Sunday with new cuts and scrapes. Kaya was looking forward to trying a new healing spell Catarina taught her."

They were getting on the highway, picking up speed as they headed north west. In a couple of hours, they would reach Mendocino National Park, where they would stop for an early dinner, before parking the car and portalling to their cottage by the sea. This had become their routine every time they went away to their cottage for the weekend. Rather than portalling directly there, they always drove part of the way. At the beginning they had told themselves that it was for the sake of pretense, that it would look suspicious if Professor Lightwood disappeared into a closet at the university with his husband and never came out. They had argued that this was also a way to ensure that the kids live as much a normal mundane life as possible. But over time, they had dropped all pretense and recognized that they enjoyed the leisured drive, especially on sunny days when they could lower the top and enjoy the breeze. In the early years of their lives as parents, they had packed the kids into the big family car, but as the children grew and developed their own interests and relationships, their group had begun to shrink until it was just the two of them once again.

 _Time does fly,_ Alec thought as he gazed towards the distance. He extended his arm over his head and let the wind run through his fingers, as if to imbue the thought with a physical sensation.

Twenty-seven years had passed since they went to the Seventh Circle and their lives changed forever; twenty-two years since Alec had stopped aging and he and Magnus professed their eternal love in front of all their friends and family; and, seventeen since that fatidic night when Magnus and Alec welcomed Sofia and Matias Bane-Lightwood into the world and became parents for the first time. Seventeen years since he left the ranks of the Shadowhunters and decided to live as much a mundane life as was possible under the circumstances.

" _You took a solemn oath when you left, brother, that if I ever needed you, you would come back; I need you now."_ His parabatai's words echoed in Alec's mind, the words feeling as heavy in his mind as the fire message felt in his pocket. The words had the force of the oath they reminded him of, the oath he had sworn that night seventeen years ago when he and Magnus had sneaked out in the middle of the night, pierced the border between the shadow world and the mundane world, carrying the twins, determined to fulfill the promise they had made to their dying mother a few months before.

They had not planned to be in South America when the Montevideo Institute was destroyed during one of the worst demon attacks in years. It had been pure chance or perhaps fate. For a few months, Magnus and Alec had been planning to portal to Machu Picchu for a long weekend of hiking and sightseeing. That night, they had gone back to their hotel after a long day exploring the ruins of the ancient city. Magnus had drawn them a bath and they had spent a wonderful hour soaking in the tub; washing away sweat and grime; laughing and talking; completely oblivious to the troubles of the world; happily looking forward to a quiet dinner and a night in the enormous canopy bed, lost in each other's arms, making love with a passion that did not go away despite years of sharing the same bed.

Alec had been in the process of getting out of the bathtub when his phone had begun to ring insistently. He had quickly sprung into action, donning his Shadowhunter gear and wrapping his bow and quiver across his back. Magnus had dressed in equally swift fashion, determined, as usual, to follow his husband into the very depth of hell if needed.

Hell had been precisely what they had found when they stepped through the portal and onto the grounds of one of South America's oldest institutes. The building had been completely engulfed in flames, the demonic energy that fed the fires making them burn so hot that even brick and rock melted; the stench of sulfur and burning flesh impregnating the air and making it hard to breathe. It was the middle of the night and many of the Montevideo's Shadowhunters had been asleep. Those who had been on patrol were starting to arrive and were running back and forth in a state of utter confusion and disbelief.

Alec and Magnus had quickly taken command and had organized search and rescue teams as well as teams in charge of bringing the fire under control. Using magic spells designed to protect them from burns, they had been among the first to walk into the burning building and begin to painful task of searching for survivors. They had found mostly horrid death and destruction. That is until they reached the almost completely consumed doors of what had been the infirmary. There among charred debris, they had found the body of Matias Almendros, his chest pierced by the venomous sting of a demon, his face hidden under his long blond curls. A few steps away, laid the body of the demon, a seraph blade piercing him from chest to back.

Magnus had seen the young Shadowhunter only a handful of times, and thus did not remember him very well, but Alec knew him. Matias and his wife Mariana had been students of Alec's during one of his terms teaching at the Idris Academy. The young man had been a mundane that had fallen in love with a Shadowhunter. In order to be with her, he had taken the great risk of drinking from the Mortal Cup in order to ascend and become Nephilim. He had survived the procedure and upon marrying Mariana, had taken her last name and become a member of an old Shadowhunter family. They had then moved to Montevideo to run the institute with her parents.

When Alec met them, they had been newlyweds and Marianna had confided on Alec that she admired him for his determination to live according to his own decisions, no caring what rules or social conventions he broke in the process. She had also confessed that she had wanted to leave the Shadowhunters when she met Matias; that she had never wanted to impose ascension on the man she loved, but Matias had told her that being a Shadowhunter was her calling and he could never ask her to give that up. Neither of them had known that their life together would be short and its end tragic.

Magnus had been the one who, after confirming that Matias was dead, had walked into the ruins of the infirmary, convinced that he could hear someone calling for help. Alec had followed close behind, his bow in hand, an arrow nocked and ready to shoot. They had found Mariana trapped underneath part of the roof that had collapsed. Magnus and Alec had combined magic powers to free her, and what they found underneath rendered them both speechless. Alec had heard that Mariana was pregnant, but he did not know how far along she was. But it took only one glance for him to realize that her pregnancy was quite advanced and that she had gone into labor in the middle of the attack. She was also gravely injured and dying.

"Help me Alec," she had pleaded between painful gasps, "I don't want my babies to die in my belly, but I don't have the strength to deliver them on my own. You have to take them out."

Alec had glanced at Magnus and immediately known that the situation was even more dire that he had suspected. For after running a quick hand over Mariana's body to assess the state of her injuries, Magnus had looked at Alec with hopelessness in his eyes and had almost imperceptibly shaken his head.

"There is no hope for me; I am dying," Mariana had stated grabbing Alec's hand with surprising strength, confirming Magnus' assessment. "But there is still hope for the twins if you help me." She had then shifted her gaze towards Magnus and the force of her gaze was as powerful as her grip. "You have to deliver the children," she had added as another contraction run through her body.

That is how it came to pass that Alec and Magnus helped a dying courageous Shadowhunter bring into the world two beautiful children. In the process and in an act of selfless generosity, Mariana Almendros made Alec and Magnus parents. Their daughter had arrived first, crying at the top of her lungs, all Shadowhunter willfulness and strength, her blond curls – like her biological father's – making her look like a cherub from a renaissance painting. Magnus had wrapped her in his jacket and had placed her on Mariana's chest. She had kissed her on the forehead and named her Sofia after her own grandmother. Their son had arrived a couple of minutes later, quiet and wide eyed; observant and thoughtful; an old soul from the very beginning; a mane of chestnut brown hair – the same tone as his mother's – reaching almost to his shoulders. Alec took off the grey hoodie he was wearing under his jacket and wrapped it around his tiny body. Mariana kissed him as she had kissed her daughter and named him Matias after the man she had loved and who had died protecting his family.

The twins took their first breaths as their mother took her last and with that last breath, Mariana extracted a final and solemn promise from Alec and Magnus, to give their children the freedom to decide their own destinies. "Let them decide for themselves whether they want to have our life, Alec," Mariana had said as she laid dying in a pool of her own blood, "the way you two have done. They are your children now," she had added looking from Alec to Magnus; "don't let The Clave decide their fate or taken them away from you." She had then laid her head back on the stone ground and with a last sigh closed her eyes. A few seconds later, Magnus had placed a finger against the side of her neck and confirmed that Mariana Almendros had passed from this world.

Magnus and Alec had looked at one another, each of their expressions mirroring the mixture of fear, surprise and uncertainty they saw in the eyes of the other. They then looked down at the small bundles in each of their arms and, at that very moment, all fear and uncertainty disappeared. "We need to get them to safety," Magnus stated gazing around at the death and burning devastation that surrounded them and hugging Sofia closer to his chest in a protective gesture.

"Right," Alec responded jumping into action with unexpected foresight, "you need to leave and take the children to New York, Magnus. I will join you as soon as I can. Go to the mundane Health Department first thing tomorrow and register their birth and then ask Jem to perform the Nephilim protection ceremony on them."

Nephilim children were not usually registered in the mundane records and many of them did not even hold birth certificates or passports. Yet at that moment, Alec had understood that if he and Magnus had any hope of both keeping their children and honoring Mariana's dying wish, they needed to move fast and think ahead.

"Okay," Magnus had said, no needing any further explanation to understand Alec's meaning. He had then fished his phone out of his pocket and dialed Tessa's number. Less than two minutes later, Alec had kissed Magnus on the lips and then their son and daughter on the forehead, before Magnus stepped across the event horizon of the portal Alec had opened, carrying one child in each arm.

The following morning, Luke had accompanied a nervous Magnus to register the twins' home birth. For the occasion, Magnus had worn an unusually conservative dark grey suit and foregone all make up and jewelry, and for months afterwards, Luke had teased him that he had looked like an insurance salesman. At Alec's insistence, the children had been entered into the records as Sofia and Matias Bane-Lightwood with Magnus and Alec as their parents. Alec had insisted because he wanted no one to ever doubt that the twins were as much Magnus' and they were his. When Alec finally portalled back to New York the evening after the Montevideo attack, a small circle of their closest family and friends were waiting in their apartment for Jem to perform the ceremony that would protect Sofia and Matias against any demon attack until they reached the Nephilim age of maturity.

The arrival of the twins had marked the beginning of the end of Alec's term as Head of the New York Institute and of his life as a Shadowhunter. While by them Nephilim law granted some recognition and protection to same-sex relationships – thanks in great part to Alec's efforts – it did not yet grant parental rights to same-sex couples. The Clave was especially reluctant to allow a Downworlder, someone with demon blood, to raise two of the Angel's chosen, no matter how respected Magnus and Alec were among the Nephilim. Thankfully, Alec's condition as a Nephilim-warlock hybrid was known only to their closest family and friends, or the situation would have certainly been hopeless.

Over the next several months, Magnus and Alec had fought fiercely for their children, countering with carefully articulated rebuttals every attempt made by The Clave to challenge their claim as Sofia and Matias' parents. The Clave had insisted that the children needed to be raised within a 'properly constituted' Nephilim family; that, as was traditional with most orphans, the twins should grow in an Institute and within a 'proper' Nephilim environment; that two men were ill equipped to raise children, specially girls; that a warlock was not the right kind of influence for a Nephilim child. The Clave had even attempted to track down members of the Almendros family hoping to find even a distant relative willing to challenge Alec and Magnus' claim on the children, but the whole Almendros' clan had died in Montevideo.

Magnus and Alec had fought The Clave at every turn, calling attention to the backwardness of their arguments; opening their home to be inspected by Clave delegates; calling witnesses to attest to their parenting skills and their love for their children; demonstrating with increasing certainty that they were the twins' unquestioned parents. After months of relentless battle and scrutiny, The Clave had run out of arguments and had no other choice but to grant Magnus and Alec temporary guardianship of the twins. The decision had included two important caveats, however: Magnus and Alec were ordered to submit to periodical visits and assessments "for the purpose of ensuring the children were growing up in the proper environment and with the right influence," and that if something ever happened to Alec, "the children be returned to the custody of the Clave."

That evening, Alec and Magnus had gone home where Jace, Clary and Izzy were waiting, Matias placidly sleeping on Jace's arms and Sofia bouncing in Izzy's. After greeting their children and family, Magnus and Alec had walked towards a closet and had extracted from it a few already packed suitcases.

"We are leaving," Alec had informed his siblings as he handed Jace the letter in which he resigned as Head of the Institute and to the ranks of the Shadowhunters. "You are now in charge Jace, you will do fine. We will be in touch as soon as we get settled, but I am afraid we won't see each other for a while, perhaps years."

"Why?" Izzy had asked, tightening her hold on her niece. "You already have guardianship of the children. In time, The Clave will give up and leave you alone."

"That might be the case," Alec argued, "but we cannot live with the fear that if something happens to me, Magnus would lose the children too. Besides, we made a promise to Mariana to give our children the right to choose their own destiny," Alec added. "In order to fulfill that promise we have to go away and give them the option of growing up far from The Clave's influence. Besides, you know the Clave will not easily give up. "

"We do not want our children to grow up feeling that their family is abnormal," Magnus had added, "or that it is wrong for them to have warlocks as parents."

"It won't be forever," Alec had stated as he hugged his sister. "You won't be able to reach me or track me for a while. I am activating my anti-tracking rune, but I will be in touch, I promise. And, as soon as we are settled, and it is safe, we will arrange for you to come visit."

Alec had then embraced his brother and Jace had demanded the oath that he was now asking Alec to fulfill, that when he needed him, he would come back. Over the next seventeen years, Jace never reminded him of the oath, for they both knew that Nephilim oaths were unbreakable and needed no reminding. Despite the fact that Jace had fought many battles and wars since Alec left the Shadowhunters, his brother had never before asked him to fulfill his promise either. For Jace had also sworn that night that he would only call on Alec if the situation was truly dire, which apparently it now was.

Izzy and Jace had thought at first that Magnus and Alec were being overly cautious, but over the next two years, they had realized that they have been right to be so. The Clave had constantly demanded to know the whereabouts of Alec and the children, arguing that it was their prerogative to ensure the children 'proper' upbringing, that Nephilim children could not simply disappear or be taken away to be raised by Downworlders. Two years had passed before The Clave gave up; two years in which Izzy, Jace and Clary got to see their niece and nephew only on special occasions and always in secret.

The Clave eventually stopped challenging Magnus and Alec's claims on their children, making it possible for them to no longer live in hiding. Still, Magnus and Alec kept their distance. Alec never again stepped into the Institute and did not visit Idris. Magnus avoided to work for the Nephilim as much as possible preferring his private clients. They also remained committed to giving their children as much as possible an ordinary life, a life of soccer games, regular schools, science and art fairs, and weekends away.

Alec and Magnus never concealed their ancestry or the conditions of their birth from their children. They taught them everything they could about their history, and Alec even trained them to defend themselves. However, they also remained true to the promise they had made their mother and, thus, did not pressure the twins to follow on their ancestors' footsteps. That is why despite the fact that Nephilim children usually received their first rune at the age of six, Sofie and Matt did not go through their first running ceremony until they were eleven and choose to do so. Even then, the ceremony took place, not at an Institute as it was tradition, but at Luke's farm surrounded by friends and family, mundanes, downworlders and Nephilim. By then, two more siblings had joined the Bane-Lightwood family: Kaya and Joshua.

Alec had wanted to protect his children, to give them choices, to open up as many opportunities as possible for them to decide on their paths. Yet, as Magnus now negotiated highway traffic and Alec watched the landscape pass by, he wondered whether he could continue to keep the promise he had made Mariana now that Jace had finally asked him to fulfill his oath.

The gentle touch of a familiar hand atop his own called Alec back to the present and as he turned to look at his husband's lovely face, he smiled.

"What are you thinking so hard about Alexander?" Magnus asked.

"About the passage of time," Alec replied. "When did we go from packing four children in a family van along with what seemed like an endless supply of toys and children books to being just the two of us again?"

"Are you feeling old Alexander?"

"No, I just hoped it would last longer," Alec replied, placing his other hand atop Magnus', trapping his lover's hand between his own. "I had hoped the children would be along for the ride a bit longer. I had hoped that at least Joshua would still want to go away with us."

Magnus had noticed that Alec had been particularly quiet since he picked him up at the university. It was not an uncomfortable silence because over the years they had learned to live with and respect each other's need for quietness, to not take silence personally, to not assume that they were shut out of the other's thoughts simply because they were not yet ready to put them into words. Magnus suspected though that something important was occupying Alec's thoughts and knew that he just needed to wait until his husband was ready to speak what was in his mind.

He was turning into the parking lot of their favorite restaurant, a quaint little bistro run by a werewolf named Marcia and her husband. Once he parked and turned off the engine, he half turned on his seat, took Alec's hand in his once again, and looked at him with loving intensity. Middle age and parenthood suited Alec, he thought. Fatherly concern and love softened his features and gave him a vulnerability that made Magnus fall even more deeply in love with him, if that was possible. "Kaya will remain with us a while longer," Magnus said.

"Perhaps," Alec replied. "But Magnus, I know you have been looking out for the signs already. I have also been watching her, knowing that soon the day will come when she will stop aging and will become full-grown warlock, frozen in time. I know you are anticipating that as well."

"Yes," Magnus replied with a sigh. "But I don't think that will happen for another few years. She is only sixteen and her power are not yet fully developed. We still have time."

The twins had been three years old when the phone rang one morning. When Alec picked up, Jem told him that he and Magnus needed to portal to a small remote village in Japan. "There is someone I want you to meet," Jem had said, "someone who needs the two of you very much."

They had been living in Oxford, England for the past two years, ever since they left New York. They had gone there because Magnus owned a house in the outskirts of the town, a house big enough for them to raise their children in safety. After a period of uncertainty in which Alec had contemplated what he wanted to do with his life now that he no longer was a Shadowhunter, he had decided that he wanted to go to school. Magnus had suggested that perhaps he should improve his magic skills and work as a warlock, but while Alec had mastered quite a few magic powers, especially those needed for healing, he knew that he would never be a powerful warlock and was fine with that. Yet, he had always liked reading and considered himself intelligent enough to navigate the mundane education system, even if he had never stepped into a mundane classroom in his life. He had asked Magnus to get him mundane education credentials in addition to a mundane passport, birth certificate and social security number, and, after months of independent study, he had gained entry into a Masters in English Literature at Oxford. During those first years, Magnus taught Alec how to drive and navigate the most mundane aspects of human life, like grocery shopping, paying bills, and doing maintenance work in their home. They avoided using magic as much as possible, not wanting to call attention to themselves and except for his anti-tracking rune, which Alec redrew every so often, his runes had slowly began to fade from black to a faint silver.

Alec divided his time between the classroom and parenting. At the beginning he had considered getting a job; after all, he had walked away from his life with just two suitcases, leaving all his possessions and any wealth his might have had behind. But Magnus had told him that they were quiet wealthy and that even if neither of them worked for money for a couple of decades, they would still be okay. Still, Alec had encouraged Magnus to continue providing his warlock services and had helped him set shop in a converted barn adjacent to their Oxford house. He had insisted not because they needed the money, but because he knew Magnus would be unhappy if he stopped doing magic. Magnus would not be Magnus, his Magnus, if he did not have a chance to also be a warlock. Magnus had drawn the line at demon summoning, however, afraid that even the most benign form of dark magic could place his family at risk. Thus, during those first two years and for years afterwards, he had mostly offered white magic services, potions, love spells, spells meant to ensure economic success or fame, etc. He had also continued working in the translation of ancient documents and manuscripts, a job that did not require much magic.

Magnus and Alec would remember those first years as an endless chain of diaper changes, feedings, sleepless nights, and hours of cuddling with the twins. They took the twins for long walks around the park and even met other parents with whom they struck friendships, organized playing dates and birthday parties. Eventually, neither of them could remember a time when Sofie and Matt were not part of their lives. They fiercely loved their children and celebrated every small and no so small achievement – first smiles, first steps, first words – with a mixture of happiness and sorrow. For with each of Sofie and Matt's new achievement, they grew more independent and loss some of their babyhood.

A few months after he started graduate school, Alec was admitted into a doctorate in English Literature. As a Shadowhunter, he had always enjoyed teaching younger recruits, and in university, he had discovered a passion for research and writing.

When Jem called, Alec had been in the middle of planning for his doctorate thesis research, his time divided between parenting the twins and studying. Alec would remember that call as another important and unforgettable milestone in his and Magnus' life. At first, Magnus had been reluctant to portal to Japan arguing that the children were too small to be left under Catarina's care; that he did not understand why Jem could not simply portal to Oxford himself if he needed to see them. However, all his complaining had stopped as soon as they walked into the orphanage where they met Kaya Misako, their daughter.

Jem had been waiting for them at the other side of the portal that took Alec and Magnus to a secluded corner on the grounds of an old nunnery that now served as an orphanage. As soon as they arrived, he escorted them into a room with whitewashed walls, terracotta red tiles on the floor, and windows that looked out towards the mountains and the forest in the distance. White metal cribs – some empty, some occupied – were lined up against the walls and the room smelled of a mixture of bleach, sour milk and urine. Jem had introduced them to a grave looking Dutch nun in a long black and white habit, who had taken them to a corner of the room where a small child – no older than two – sat quietly in her crib. She had long blue hair that reached half way down her tiny back, and her silver colored eyes looked at them with wide curiosity. Kaya had gazed from Alec to Magnus and, recognizing them as kin, had extended her tiny arms towards Magnus, and just like that Magnus had surrendered to his daughter's charms. "She reminds me of you," he had whispered as he looked from the child to Alec. "Your eyes shine in almost the same tone of silver when magic runs through you."

Kaya had been abandoned at the orphanage's doorsteps when she was no more than a couple of days old. She had spent the first two years of her life being looked upon with increasing unease by the nuns in charge of the place. The strange color of her eyes and the fact that her hair changed from almost white to dark blue depending on her mood both fascinated and scared the women. She was, otherwise, a pleasant, intelligent, thoughtful and quiet child and had a knack for calming the other children when they were upset by simply looking at them with those silver eyes. The nuns had named her Kaya and later added Misako as her second name because she was truly a fascinating creature. When it had become obvious that the child had unique abilities, the Dutch nun had contacted Jem whom she had met during one of Jem and Tessa's trips to Japan, and Jem had called Magnus and Alec. Alec had taken one look at his husband and at the way he held and smiled at Kaya and had known that it would be futile to try to separate them.

"Can we do it Alexander?" Magnus had asked, wanting to give Alec the choice to say no, thinking that perhaps he could find another way to help this small warlock child.

"I don't see why not, Magnus. We can afford it and we already have two, how hard can it be to raise three?"

"That is not what I mean," Magnus had replied, placing Kaya in Jem's arms and taking Alec by the hand towards a corner of the room. "You are busy with your studies and the twins may not like having a new member in the family."

"We will manage Magnus," Alec had replied and had placed a gentle hand against Magnus' cheek.

Wanting to make sure that Alec continued with his studies uninterruptedly, Magnus had reduced his hours of work and the number of his clients in order to spend more time with the children and do more of the parenting. At the end, his concern for the twins had been unwarranted. Sofie and Matt had seamlessly adjusted to their new sister, simply extending the circle of complicity to include Kaya, and Kaya had loved Matt and Sofie from the very first moment.

The two sisters had developed an immediate complicity and closeness, a closeness based on shared passion for adventure. From the beginning Kaya followed her sister everywhere, even when Sofie began to attend regular Shadowhunter training under Izzy's tutelage. They always joked that if they could, they would become parabatai, but that even if they couldn't, they would still fight together. With Matt, Kaya had the most special relationship, a relationship built less on fighting and training, and more on common intellectual interests. Kaya and Matt read similar books, had similar tastes in art and music, and even shared a love for graphic novels. Kaya had been the first one to whom Matt had told that he had no desire to join the Shadowhunters, that his passion was human medicine and that he hoped one day to become a doctor. The confession had been unnecessary; for Kaya had known as much a long time ago.

Joshua had arrived to complete their lives three years later. By then, the Bane-Lightwood family had settled in Berkeley where Alec had secured an assistant professor position in the Comparative Literature Department. He had just published his first academic book: "Among us: The influence of the supernatural in popular culture," a book that would eventually become required reading in many literature and popular culture studies programs and that had secured him a place of respect among his scholarly peers. He was also in the process of writing "Quest", the first in the series of fantasy novels that would eventually made him a well-known and respected author. He and Magnus always joked that Alec had made a career of turning into fantasy for mundane readers what for him was reality.

"I am the only author I know who writes autobiography and people think it is make-believe," he used to say every time any of his downworlder friends asked about his novels.

Alec had been at first reluctant to return to the States, concerned that the closer they were to New York, the more likely it would be that his old life would call him back. He was also worried about uprooting the children, but Magnus had argued that the children would adjust and that moving back would make it easier for them to develop relationships with their aunt, uncles and cousins. By then, Izzy and Jace had children of their own. Magnus, on the other hand, had no trouble moving back, for his business had always carried him back and forth. They eventually settled back in the States with not even a hiccup, the fear of losing the twins almost forgotten, their time in New York a pleasant memory that no longer caused nostalgia or pain.

Magnus and Alec had been having a quiet breakfast in their kitchen the morning Joshua entered their lives. The five-year old twins and four-year old Kaya were surprisingly still asleep, and Magnus and Alec were enjoying the unexpected peace.

"You woke me up in the middle of the night," Magnus had been whispering in Alec's ear, "you should do that more often."

"You are always the one to wake me up," Alec replied, planting a soft and tender kiss on Magnus' lips, "it was about time that I got the upper hand, don't you think?" He was about to claim Magnus' mouth more resolutely, when the doorbell rand. "Hum, who could it be so early on a Saturday?"

"I don't know, but if you pour me another cup of coffee, I will go find out," Magnus had replied.

That is precisely what Alec had been doing when Magnus walked back into the kitchen a few moments later. "We are going to have to either move or stop answering our door, Alexander," he said in a tone that conveyed a mixture of humor, surprise and puzzlement.

Behind Magnus, walked Luke Graymark and Maia Roberts, a small bundle wrapped in a white blanket securely in her arms.

"What is going on?" Alec had asked, standing up to greet his longtime friends. As soon as he gave Maia a half-embrace, the small bundle in her arms stirred and began to complain in a cry that Alec recognized as one of hunger. Gently moving the blanket aside, Alec peered into the black eyes of a new born baby – perhaps not older than two weeks – with a head covered in soft black curls and a face the color of cinnamon. Alec had looked from the baby's face back to Maia and then towards Luke.

"We were in Savannah, Georgia last night, attending a meeting of the local werewolf clan," Luke had explained. "Someone left this baby outside Maia's hotel room with a note saying that his name is Joshua, no last name, no birth certificate, nothing. The note only said that the mother wanted him to be with his kind."

"That is a werewolf child," Magnus had said as he came to stand beside Alec, his tone one of amazement and concern. He too looked at baby Joshua who by now was beginning to wonder when someone would finally feed him. Magnus had recognized the scent of wolf in the child. "It is rare for a child to be born a werewolf and happens mostly when a woman is bitten during pregnancy. Most of the time, werewolf children do not survive birth; this one is a fighter. Who is the mother?"

"We do not know for sure," Maia responded, "but we suspect that it was a young woman whose body washed up to shore this morning. She was apparently at the meeting last night. Marie, the clan leader, told us that they had never seen her before. They do not know her name or where she lived. We think she committed suicide. We did not know where else to take him."

"So, you brought him here?!" Magnus replied, his tone a little bit more forceful than he had intended. At the sound of a raised voice, Joshua had given up all pretense of being patient and had begun to wail.

Alec had stepped into action immediately, warming a bottle and bringing it to Maia. "I have never fed a baby," Maia had confessed. So, Alec had taken Joshua from her. Joshua had immediately quieted and had happily taken the bottle, content for the first time in hours to be in the arms of someone who obviously knew what he was doing.

An animated discussion had ensued between Magnus, Luke and Maia, but Alec was not paying attention. He was mesmerized by Joshua's placid expression and by the unmistakable scent and feel of a newborn baby. "We should keep him Magnus," Alec had stated a few minutes later, interrupting Magnus who at that moment was saying to Luke that he and Alec might not be the best suited to raise a werewolf child.

"We will help," Luke had immediately offered. "I can be uncle Luke and take him to my farm on weekends and during the full moon and eventually introduce him to our pack."

Magnus had sighed loudly and shaken his head at Alec but had not argued any further. For he had seen in the face of his husband that any argument would be futile. And just like that, a morning that had begun with remembrances of a night of passionate lovemaking had turned into the first day of their lives with Joshua. "Well, I guess I better go dig out my ugly 'insurance salesman' suit so I can go register our son," Magnus had stated as he finally approached Alec and kissed first him and then the forehead of the small child who now slept placidly in his husband's arms.

"You are coming with me Luke as it is tradition, so do not go anywhere," he then added as he turned towards the stairs. "We are going to need a nanny, preferably one that is also a werewolf.

"I know just the one," Maia stated. "She is a friend of mine."

"Your family is officially the United Nations of the Shadow World," Simon had teased them at their annual Christmas party that year, as he held a bouncing six-month-old Joshua in his arms. Joshua looked at his uncle with the fascinated attention with which he approached every new face. "You now just need a vampire and a Seelie."

"Do not put any ideas in Alec's head," Magnus had pleaded with a smile as he took Alec's hand in his and brought it to his lips for a kiss. He had then reached and run a gentle hand through Joshua soft curls, the gesture completely loving in its unguardedness. "Besides, I already raised Raphael. That was enough for me, thank you very much."

"What are you going to do when he begins to turn during the full moon?" Simon had asked.

Alec and Magnus had already thought of that eventuality. They had sold their house and were buying a bigger place in the outskirts of the city, a place with a big enough basement and backyard to accommodate their son's growing needs. They had also hired Maia's friend to help out.

However, at the end, Joshua had been an easier child than they had expected, quiet and thoughtful, a born-poet, a sensitive soul as well as practical man. He had accepted his own nature and the changes that came over him every month with the same ease with which he had accepted that he was a black child living in a multiracial two-father family. After all, he had two dads, one Asian one white, his oldest brother and sister were half-Latino and wore runes on their skin, and Kaya, who was Japanese by birth, had hair that changed color with her mood. What if he turned into a wolf once every full moon?

"You know Joshua is the one who needs the most to spend time with his kind," Magnus said as he looked into Alec's eyes, his tone full of understanding. "He treasures his weekends with Luke and the pack, the feeling of running free through the forest under the full moon. That does not mean he does not need us anymore. He is just twelve, still a child."

They had parked the car and were now having dinner at their friends' bistro. Magnus reached across the table and took Alec's hand, the gesture completely unguarded despite the fact that they rarely expressed affection in public. He understood Alec's nostalgia for times gone by, for mornings spent playing with the children, for the sound of small feet running down the hallway and even for midnight feedings and sleepless nights. He understood because he shared the feeling. Magnus had lived many lives and had seen many people he loved age and die. He knew that Alec was still learning what it was like to live on after the ones you love are gone, what it was like to experience so much grief that you curse your immortality. He just hoped that Alec would not have to experience that loss for decades to come.

"I know," Alec replied with a slight shrug of his shoulders. "Still, I think I am starting to get empty nest syndrome. Don't you miss the feeling of a small body wrapped around you, of short legs dangling down as you carry one of the kids to bed? Soon, Matt will be off to college and become a doctor, and Sofie will go to the Idris Academy with Izzy's kids, and then join an Institute and become a Shadowhunter. Kaya will eventually go off and live her own life. Joshua is the youngest of our children and I found myself feeling reluctant to let him go."

"Yes, I miss that too," Magnus replied with a smile that conveyed as much nostalgia as Alec's words.

Alec and Magnus had dinner in easy companionship, and as they enjoyed their meals, they talked about holiday plans, the cost of tuition for medical school, Sofie needing new Shadowhunter gear, Kaya mastering a particularly complicated spell, and Joshua wanting to spend two weeks that summer camping with Luke and the pack in Yellowstone National Park. Anyone listening to their conversation would have recognized the mixture of pride and concern that characterized most parents, even if the content of their conversation was somewhat foreign.

After dinner, they said good bye to Marcia and her husband and, as they always did, asked them to keep an eye on their car. They then picked up their duffle bags from the back of their convertible and walked a few hundred meters into the forest before Magnus opened the portal that took them to their cottage by the sea. They stepped through onto the foyer of their home and as soon as the portal closed behind them, Alec turned, dropped his bag on the floor, and wrapping an arm around Magnus waist, pulled him closer and kissed him deeply and tenderly on the lips. Magnus welcomed the gesture and corresponded the kiss with equal enthusiasm and a little possessiveness. He had been wanting to kiss his husband since he first saw him talking to that flirtatious student outside the café.

"Have I told you lately that middle-age suits you Magnus?" Alec asked once his lips relinquished their claim over Magnus'. "The silver in your hair and the lines around your eyes make you look very interesting and sophisticated."

"Thank you," Magnus replied, and it was now him the one to take possession of Alec's lips, the kiss passionate but unhurried. After all, they had the whole weekend and there was no need to rush. The pleasure of making love without rush or concern about a child waking up was one of the best parts of having children old enough to have their own lives, Magnus thought. That and the pleasure of having Alec all to himself for a couple of days, to be able to peel his clothes off slowly in the living room, in the bedroom or wherever he wanted; the incredible exhilaration of making love to his husband anywhere in their house.

"Humm, welcome home husband," Alec whispered a moment later.

"Thank you, husband," Magnus replied. "How about a drink?"

"That sounds perfect," Alec replied. He took a step back, kicked off his shoes and socks, walked across the room and opened the glass door leading to the terrace, the setting sun calling to him.

Magnus also kicked his shoes off, but rather than immediately following Alec outside, he walked towards the kitchen counter where he began to mix their drinks. As he did, he looked at his husband through the window, Alec's face turned up towards the sky as if wanting to soak the last of the sun. Even after decades of a shared life, the gesture still reminded Magnus of their first time in the cottage, when he found Alec with his arms extended towards the sky, looking like an angel about to take flight. No matter how many holidays and weekends they spent in the cottage, and how many sunsets they welcomed together, Magnus still thought of that first time with a love that never ebbed, and he knew that no matter how many decades and centuries passed, that would be memory he would always make this place home.

The cottage that once had sheltered them while Alec recovered from his injuries and in which he had first discovered that his experiences in the Seventh Circle had changed his nature forever, had, in their twenty-seven years together, become their most valued and treasured possession. It was the place they went when they wanted quiet, the place that, during their years living in hiding from The Clave, became their secret meeting place with their close family and friends. Over the years, the cottage had grown to accommodate the needs of a growing family, with rooms added to accommodate playing and quiet times, times out, privacy and eventually training. When Alec started school, Magnus had built him an office besides his, a room that looked out towards the mountains and the ocean and with bookshelves covering three of the walls.

The cottage and the island were also the place where Magnus first taught Alec and later their children how to fish. It was the place where the twins received their first Shadowhunting training, Matt always the first one to master combat skills even though he could not bear the thought of hurting anyone and had no desire to become a Shadowhunter. Eventually, the children had learned to fight as a team, the twins moving with as much ease with Kaya's magic as Alec had moved with Magnus'. Even Joshua became a natural member of the team, the three older children learning to appreciate the advantages of having a four-legged team member with the agility of a wolf. In the process, Joshua also gained the confidence that his siblings would protect him even at the expense of their own safety.

Of course, like in all families, there had been difficult moments: times when the children did not get along with each other or with their fathers, and they fought most of the time over trivial things. Perhaps the hardest of those times had been with Sofie who had, from a very early age, wanted to become a Shadowhunter and had not always understood why her fathers had decided to live so far away from her people. Furthermore, she could not understand Matt's complete lack of desire to join her, his refusal to become her parabatai, and his preference for science and books instead of weapons and training. With all her teenage passion and fire, she had insisted that Alec make Matt train, arguing that it was their duty to defend humanity, to fend any demonic threats, a duty she considered more important than any futile attempt to heal mundanes.

"We promised you biological mother that we would allow you to choose your own fate," Magnus had told Sofie after one of her heated arguments with Alec in which she had pretty much accused him of being a coward for running away from his duty.

She had been thirteen at the time, and, having instantly realized the unfairness and hurtfulness of the comment, but still too proud to apologize, had stormed out of the room. Magnus had found her later sitting on the same beach where he and Alec has spent so many wonderful and private moments together. "Do you think it was easy for your father to leave his life? He is the one who lost the most in the process. He gave up his place as a leader, his relationship with his own parents, his family and home. He had to learn how to live like an ordinary mundane. He did all of that for you, so you and your brother could one day decide how you wanted to live your lives."

"Dad, I am sorry I was mean to father," Sofie had eventually said as she sought the shelter of Magnus' arms. "I don't know what gets over me sometimes. I get so angry."

"You have the volatile temper and the passion of a Shadowhunter," Magnus had replied as he stroke her long blond hair. "Those qualities will serve you well among the Nephilim if you learn to make them work in your favor."

Despite having been shared the same wound and having been born at the same time, the twins' personalities were as distinct from one another as their physical appearance. Matt was tall, muscular and with the alabaster skin and reddish-brown wavy hair he had inherited from Mariana Almendros. His looks were a sharp contrast to his petite sister with her light peach-tone skin and the long blond curls she had inherited from her biological father. Their different personalities and interests had made adolescence particularly hard for them, a period marked by a friction that was only now starting to abate. Magnus knew he was not supposed to have favorites, but he had a soft spot in his heart for the twins. He had, after all, helped bring them into the world. He also recognized himself in the fiery Sofie more than he did in Kaya – despite the fact that Kaya was a warlock like him – and he recognized Alec in Matt, the same thoughtful and sensitive nature, the same selflessness, the same kind heart.

Of course, Magnus loved Kaya and Joshua. Kaya with her amiable personality and her special ability to make people feel at ease seemed to have taken the role of the glue that united her siblings. She got along with Matt and shared many of his interests as much as she got along with Sofie with whom she shared a love for adventure and a desire to fight evil. Kaya also knew that her condition as a warlock meant that she would likely be the one to accompany his siblings as they aged, that their lives would be shorter than hers, and she did not want to waste any time in disagreements and fights.

Joshua, being the youngest, was the one that kept the family laughing, the eternal comedian, the one with the ability to break through any tension, and to laugh at himself as much as at others. Yet, underneath all that, he was a kind and sensitive soul, an accepting man, a lover rather than a fighter. He also worshipped Alec with a love and loyalty than accepted no critique. He was still too young, but Magnus suspected that Joshua was gay; he had already seen the signs, the way his heart seemed to skip a beat every time a handsome boy was in the vicinity, and he hoped that Joshua would discover himself in a welcoming and accepting community, a better world than the one in which he and Alec had grown up.

 _Thank the Angel that Sofie's difficult teenage years were almost over_ , thought Magnus as he walked onto the terrace with a drink in each hand. Except for the usual crushes and heartbreaks, Matt had never gone through the kind of rebellious stage Sofia had gone through, and Kaya was too sensible to let hormones get the better of her. While Joshua was still to hit the dreaded teens, Magnus suspected that his youngest son was too much of a practical man to rebel or to agonize over his sexual identity. If he could accept his monthly transformation as a fact of life, he would likely accept any other aspect of his identity, as well as the ups and down of teenage years with similar equanimity.

"What should we do tonight?" Magnus asked as he handed Alec his drink. Leaning against the rail, he took a sip of his own cocktail and briefly glanced in the direction of the mountains behind which the sun had all but disappeared.

"I don't know," Alec replied turning to look at his husband and smiling in that suggestive way that always made the color raise to Magnus' cheeks. "What do you have in mind?" he added and when Magnus looked back at him, bit his lower lip in that way that he knew drove Magnus crazy.

Magnus shifted his gaze from Alec's eyes down to those sinful lips. After a moment of delightful anticipation, he leaned in and gently and tenderly kissed Alec, his free hand reaching and caressing his husband's cheek. Alec closed even more the distance between them, his free arm rounding Magnus' waist and pulling him closer. He then parted his lips a little, the gesture an invitation to Magnus' tongue to come out and play. Magnus responded without delay, his heartbeat picking up speed, his body awakening in response to Alec's beckoning.

"Humm, right now, the only thing I want, warlock, is to have you naked, willing and all to myself," Alec stated during a break in their kissing.

"Your wish is my command Shadowhunter," Magnus replied, and taking a step back, took Alec's hand and led him up the stairs and to their bedroom, depositing his drink on the kitchen counter along the way. Alec also left his drink on the counter. Alcohol was, after all, overrated. He preferred to get drunk in the scent and taste of Magnus.

"You and me, shower, right now," Magnus said as soon as they entered their bedroom and with a quick snap of his fingers, he willed the door to close behind them.

"Humm, as usual, you read my mind, Magnus," Alec replied, as he began to undo the bottoms on Magnus' shirt and plant soft kissed along his neck and on the newly exposed skin. In no time, they were both shirtless, golden and silver skins melting into one another, goosebumps awakening along arms and chests. As he rounded Alec's behind with both hands, Magnus pulled him along towards the bathroom and once there, and with already familiar but still surprising dexterity, he undid belt buckle and zipper at the same time that he sat on the edge of the tub and pull Alec closer, determined to explore his lover's body until Alec called his name at the top of his lungs.

After a long while in which Magnus explored him with that blessed mouth of his, bringing him almost to the edge of insanity, Alec looked down at the loving face of this man that was not only his husband, the companion of his life, but also and most importantly, his lover. Magnus looked up at him and smiled, and Alec run a gentle hand through his hair. "No, this would not do," he bended down and whispered in Magnus' ear. "You know there are no glamors in this house," he added as he pulled Magnus to his feet and wrapped an arm firmly around his waist.

Alec then snapped his fingers and silver streams of magic began to sparkle between them. "Middle age becomes you Magnus, but we agreed that we would never use glamor here," he added as he run a gentle hand along Magnus' hair and then his face. As if he was peeling a thin layer of skin and with a steady, yet gentle stream of silver magic, Alec removed the glamor that concealed Magnus' agelessness: the laugh lines around his eyes, the wrinkles along his forehead and the silver strands of hair that made Magnus look like a handsome fifty-something.

Imitating Alec's gesture, Magnus also run a hand along Alec's hair, face and arms, peeling away with golden streams of magic the wrinkles, laugh lines, sun spots and silver hair that made his husband look like a well-preserved middle age man. As he did, he briefly thought of Chaste Williams and all the other students who had, over the years, harbored crushes on Alec and wondered whether Alec remained so alluring because no matter under how much glamor he concealed his agelessness, he could still not dissimulate his beautiful youth.

In moments, the glamor they wore in public, the disguise they used when meeting his children's friends, and when Alec went to work or they attended functions at the university was gone. In moments, they looked like two men in their late twenties, the way they would look for the rest of their lives.

"There you are, Magnus," Alec said with a smile. He then leaned in and kissed Magnus with a passion that knew no end, his brother's summoning, his students, his work all but forgotten. All gone, just Magnus left, always and only Magnus.

Gently, he pulled Magnus along as he walked backwards and into the shower stall that occupied one whole wall. Along the way, he reached for Magnus' belt buckle and with swift movements helped his husband out of his jeans. Once they were both naked, he turned on the water and let the shower washed away any remaining vestiges of glamor and any reminders of the mundane world they had left behind. This was the best part of their time at the cottage, Alec and Magnus knew. Here in this refuge, they could be themselves, two magic creatures, two lovers, two men that had decided to build a life together.

They explored each other's bodies for a long time, the water from the shower shutting out all other noises and creating the illusion of being completely isolated from the world. Minutes later, Alec was surrendering to a powerful orgasm, Magnus following suit soon after, and as he held his lover's trembling body, Alec thanked the Angel for perhaps the millionth time for this man and this life he felt so fortunate to have.

"More," Magnus whispered in Alec's ear a few moments later as Alec run a soft towel along his skin. "More, I want more of you," he repeated just before claiming Alec's mouth for another passionate kiss.

"Greedy, aren't you?" Alec replied. Yet, he knew that he too wanted more, that the night was just starting and that there were still hours left to spend in the arms of his lover. With determined strength, he pulled Magnus closer, their naked bodies fully alive and wanting once again.

It was now Magnus the one to pull Alec along in the direction of their bed, he the one to kiss and gently bite his long neck. When he finally felt the edge of the bed against the back of his legs, he turned and, switching positions, gently but firmly pushed Alec backwards and onto the bed. He then climbed in top of him, determined to spend as long as his strength allowed possessing and relinquishing, giving and taking until there was nothing left of him but exhaustion and love for this man he was fortunate to call his own.

The sky had started to turn from dark to light blue when Magnus woke up alone in bed several hours later. "Alexander," he called as he lifted his head and looked around the empty room. When he received no answer, he got up, put on a pair of pajama bottoms and one of Alec's hoodies and went in search of his husband. He found him out in the part of the terrace that faced east, dressed in nothing but a pair of boxer briefs and an old t-shirt, his gaze lost in the distance. Grabbing one of Alec's old sweaters from the back of a sofa, Magnus headed outside to join him.

"So, are we going back?" he asked as he approached Alec and wrapped the sweater around his body. He then leaned against the rail and looked in the same direction of Alec's gaze.

"Back where?" Alec asked, his mind apparently lost in some distant thought.

"Back home, to New York and the Shadowhunter, of course," Magnus replied.

"You knew?" Alec asked turning to look at his lover, his expression one of surprise.

"No really, but I suspected it. You have been unusually quiet for the last few days," Magnus explained. "Besides, I saw you getting that fire message this afternoon."

"How do you know what it says?"

"I don't know, but I can guess," Magnus replied. "Newly appointed Consul Jace Herondale called me two days ago and while he did not say anything directly, I suspect her was trying to assess the situation. He asked about the children and whether you were about done with the last of your novels. He is asking you to come back, isn't he?"

Magnus was proud of Alec, of his intelligence as well as his determination to excel in any endeavor he embarked in. Alec had approached his life as a mundane with as much dedication as he had lived his life as a Shadowhunter. Not only that, he had used his knowledge and experience in the Shadow World to his advantage, as material to write three successful novels. Now, Jace was apparently asking him to once again leave his life behind and return to the ranks of the Shadowhunters.

Alec sighed and nodded. "Jace wouldn't ask me to fulfill my promise if it wasn't serious. Do you know what is going on Magnus?"

"I don't," Magnus replied. "Like you, I have stayed away from Shadowhunter business for all this time. I have made it a point not to ask Izzy or Clary any questions either."

Alec had not stepped into an Institute, let alone the New York Institute, since he and Magnus walked away. Over the years, his siblings and friends had learned to avoid any conversations related to Nephilim or Shadowhunter politics for respect to Magnus and Alec's decision to live separate from that life and give their children as much of a free choice as possible. When Sofie began to train with Izzy, it had been Magnus the one to portal her there, and Izzy had made it a point never to involve their daughter in any Shadowhunter missions until Magnus and Alec were ready to give permission. "It must be serious though," Magnus now added. "Otherwise, Jace would not be asking. What have you decided?"

"I have not decided anything," Alec replied turning and reaching for Magnus' hand. With his index finger, he traced the contours of the wedding ring he had placed in Magnus's finger twenty-two years ago. "This is not a decision I can make on my own. It is our life Magnus and we have to think of the children."

"I won't tell you what to do Alexander," Magnus said reaching with his free hand and placing it against Alec's cheek. "But you know that I will follow you to the end of the earth if necessary like you did for me." Magnus was not just referring to when Alec went to hell in search of him. He knew that when Alec decided to leave New York and the Institute, he had not only done it to protect their children. He had done it to protect Magnus, to make sure that Magnus never lost the family they had built together. Alec had followed Magnus into the mundane world and now he, Magnus, would follow him back to the ranks of the Shadowhunters if necessary.

Alec leaned in and kissed him, the kiss grateful and humble. "Thank you, Magnus," he whispered. "Thank you for loving me and for the family you have given me. I could not ask for more, and because I cannot ask for more, I don't want to ask you or the children to sacrifice the life we have in order to go back."

"I am not sacrificing anything, Alexander, and neither are the children," Magnus replied. "The children will be okay. We will make sure of that. Matt will be going to medical school in the next few months and we will protect him with all the protection spells we have at our disposal. Sofie will be happy to go back and Kaya and Joshua are as prepared for the move as the twins. We knew that this day would come one day. That is why we made sure the children were prepared."

"Still, going back is likely to make my condition as a hybrid harder to conceal," Alec stated. "You know how bigoted my people are."

Alec sighed and turned to look once again towards the distance. The sun had begun to peek from behind the mountains, golden light slowly displacing night, a halo against which Alec's face appeared even more angelic.

"We are going home then," Magnus said, not a question but statement.

Alec inhaled deeply, and as he exhaled, Magnus saw an almost imperceptible transformation in Alec's posture and demeanor, a transformation that only he, the one that knew Alec best in the world, was likely to see. He straightened his back and squared his shoulders slightly, and a look of determination rose to his eyes and settled in the lines of his face. And just like that, Alec was no longer the popular university professor and author who broke his students' heart; he was no longer the ordinary family man who dropped his children off at school every morning. Just like that, the Shadowhunter that Alec always carried within came back to the surface and right before Magnus' eyes, Alec became the warrior who loved peace; the man who would heed his brother's call even if it meant to leave behind the life he had worked so hard to build; the courageous Nephilim who had one day left everything behind to follow the man he loved because he wanted to build home and family with him.

Alec turned and looked into the unglamored cat eyes of his husband, the gold undertone of his lovely skin reflecting the sunlight and accentuating his ageless youth. In those eyes and on that face, Alec saw unconditional love, faithfulness and loyalty, and Alec knew without the shred of a doubt that Magnus would be by his side to the very end, that in the same way that he, Alec, would give his life for Magnus, Magnus would do the same in return. Alec knew that no matter where fate took them, as long as Magnus was by his side, he, Alec, would have home, kin and country.

"I guess we are," he replied and nodded. He then wrapped an arm firmly around Magnus' shoulders, the gesture meant to convey his resolve to protect his husband with his very life no matter what came their way. Magnus wrapped his own arm around Alec's waist, the gesture equally determined, for he would go to the end of the earth and beyond for this man he loved and would love for all eternity.

THE END

 **I apologize for taking so long to post the last chapter in this story. I have been out of the country on a study and research trip.**

 **I hope you enjoy reading this last installment. I wrote it in short chunks and during my breaks. I am sure it still needs work.**

 **Thanks for reading and for sticking with this story to the end.**


End file.
